Chapter 2

I didn't ask why Kurt was going into the girl's bathroom when he sprinted past me. He did spare me a dirty look before he disappeared inside. I almost wished he'd stopped and yelled at me. Maybe punched me so I could justifiably leave school.

Only two weeks into the first semester of my junior year, and already I was longing for the quasi peace of my house. I hadn't even signed up for Glee or Cheerios because I didn't think I wanted to participate in all that drama. Nobody from Glee had asked me if I was going to come, but I knew that Sue was going to find me soon. Probably threaten me some, however, it was expected so I wasn't too scared.

I entered the classroom. A few students were already in their seats scrambling through the math problems that were supposed to be due in a few minutes. I sat in the back.

I didn't follow the flow of students to the cafeteria like I used to when I was in Cheerios. Instead I headed to the library. It would have hurt my image before to be seen reading so much. But now, when I didn't care so much about how I was perceived, it didn't matter.

Not only was the library quiet, but it was just about people-free. More importantly, it was Rachel-free. I didn't want to look at her. Not after this morning.

It's not like I expected her to forgive me for the things I had put her through. I didn't expect anyone to forgive me. With Rachel though… with Rachel I thought maybe she'd give me a chance to at least help her. Just a little. To prove that maybe that offer for friendship could still be accepted.

A gentle beep sounded.

Santana: Where r u?

The text made me heart stop for a moment. Santana hadn't texted or really even talked to me for more than three weeks. She had said a quick good morning on the first day of school, but that was all. If she was wondering where I was then she must want to talk to me about something. The question was: did I want to talk to her?

The answer was a quick and efficient no. My phone went back into my pocket. Ignoring Santana was probably asking for trouble later, but I just didn't want to deal with her scathing attitude right now. I was already deprecating myself enough on my own. It was normal for Santana to be just too much. Her unstoppable bluntness was for the most part unappreciated on my account. Seldom were talks with her actually helpful. Almost always I would find myself more prone to tear someone down after a heart to heart with her than anyone else.

Another beep.

I didn't even look at me phone. I glanced around again. There were a few other's in the library, but they weren't anybody special. They were more like the people who were in the background. Not even important enough to get slushied. I made my way to a small corner of the library. Hopefully if anyone came looking they wouldn't bother actually doing a full sweep of the library in their quest to find me.

I pulled an old friend out of my backpack. A well worn, old copy of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. It was rather beaten from how often I read it, but the Harry Potter series was still my favorite. Though I had a rather deep hatred for Ron Weasley and his oafish ways. He almost reminded me of Finn with the way he offered a bare minimum in his relationships. Even in the jealousy that he had when he wasn't in one.

I opened up the book to my place(right before they entered the maze), and worked to get lost in the fantasy…

I was tearing up a bit as I read the beginning of the graveyard scene. I've read this more than ten times, but the scene still got me.

"FABRAY!" Santana screamed from the entrance of the library. She looked like a Latina whirlwind in full swing. Some people said I was scary when I was mad. At this school it was between Santana and I which one of us was more fearsome. It was almost a competition in the eyes of our peers. Since I couldn't exactly compare how daunting I really was, it would always be Santana who won in my books. I slowly sank in my chair. No sudden movements. She was scanning around the library; she ignored the shushs and glares with practiced ease. Her eyes passed over me, but I knew it was too soon to be relieved.

Only as the bell ringed did I realize I wasn't about to be found. I watched as she huffed, and stormed towards her next class. I waited a moment.

I scrambled to my class; I checked the hallways as I went. In my class I was safe. That is until I heard my phone beep again. I checked it on reflex. Two messages. One before, and one right now.

Santana: Where r u? I don't C u in the Caf.

Santana: Y AREN'T U ANSWERING? We need to talk.

Oh God…

Last period of the day. I had minutes until the bell rang. A million plans to get away before Santana found me went through my mind. So far the most brilliant of them was also pretty simple.

I would walk as fast as I could without running to my car. That way Santana wouldn't have time to find and stop me. The most she would see would be my back tail lights.

It's not like I didn't realize I would have to face Santana… I just didn't want to do it today. I had my limits. One emotionally crippling experience a day.

The ring of the bell echoed through the classroom. While everyone else packed up I was already on my way. I charged out with my head down. I didn't even make it two steps before a hand attached itself to my arm pulling me back just outside of the door I came out of.

I stared back into the eyes of Rachel, whose hand remained on my upper bicep in a way that I supposed was going to try to stop me if I tried to run away. She didn't say anything. Continuing in that fashion she began dragging me in the direction of the Glee classroom.

She gave me a gentle push into the classroom, where the members of Glee were slowly making their way in and sitting down. We didn't sit. She stood next to me as everyone got there.

"What's going on?" I asked quietly. Rachel moved to stand in front of me. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she seemed to be trying to be stern. Or at least attempting to be.

"We, those of us you see around you today, have noticed that you seem to be isolating yourself," Rachel began. I almost wanted to cut her off before she could get into full speech mode, but I figured I owed them all enough to at least hear her out. "Not only have you refrained from joining Glee, but also the Cheerios. While none of us are particularly fond of the Cheerios it seemed important to you, and we are worried about you."

"I don't plan on joining either this year," I stated firmly.

"Well that's all good if that's what you've decided bu-"

"FABRAY," Santana's cry cut off Rachel. "Why aren't you answering your phone?!"

Santana stopped a moment and glanced around at the ensemble that was encircled about Rachel and I.

"What is this some kind of intervention?"

"No," Rachel said. She was glaring at Santana for interrupting her. "We were expressing our worries for Quinn, and were then going to ask her if she was going to involve herself with Glee again."

"Sorry Man hands, me and Quinn need to be discussing Cheerios and why she hasn't signed up yet. I figure it's more important since the deadline is Thursday."

"Hey, Glee is just as important as Cheerios!" Kurt said as he stood. Other's followed his example and started making similar claims in rising voices. Of course, Santana screamed back twice as loud.

Everyone was out of control. Names were thrown about, and threats were made. It was so loud, and I was finding it extremely difficult to handle it all. What shook me to the core was the knowledge that I used to be in the center of arguments like this. I used to help start them. In a way I had started this one. Without even trying I was tearing these people apart. Why couldn't anything ever just work out for me?

I had been watching Santana one-woman army it through the arguement when my vision began to blur. I couldn't figure out what was happening. Everything was clear and then it wasn't. I shook my head to see if it helped. It didn't. Then the yelling began to die. I looked about. It seemed as if everyone was staring at me in shock. A sound escaped me. And then I realized.

I was crying.