Okie dokie guys heres chapter 28 xx I'd just liike to say goodbye and thank you to Clairebear97 who is sadly leaving fanfiction. I'm gonna miss you babe but at least we will still be able to email eachother. Your writing skills are going to be missed here, but make sure to keep on writing out side of school and good luck will your A Levels. YOu are going to do great I just know it! Anyway R&R and I will look forward to hearing from you all xxxx

Thalia's Tree x x x

Claire's POV -

Day 6 of treatment

Dear Diary,

So its 10:30am and I really should be getting ready to go for my next appointment of radiotherapy. But i'm too tired, i haven't even gotten out of bed yet. I don't think I will today, i mean its not like anybody has come up to wake me up so. . .

I suppose Dr Evelyn's idea for me to write down my feelings in a diary was a good one, but its also kind of depressing. I mean imagine being in a bad mood, then writing down your feelings and realising how bad your life is just makes you feel even worse! Radiotherapy isn't getting any easier, even though I thought it would. I mean, I remember the first time I went, I was so so scared. I knew more than anyone that this stuff would make me feel ill, worse than what I already did, but that night I didn't feel any different. Eve had actually refused to leave me alone because all of us expected me to suddenly collapse on the spot or something dramatic like that. But I didn't. I guess after that I thought I would be one of those exceptions to the rules, one of those people who gets the minimum side effects. But my God was I wrong. The next day I went back for my second lot of treatment, repeating the same thing as the day before, only this time i hit rock bottom as soon as I got in the car. I suddenly felt very tired and grouchy. From there on it just keeps going down hill. Apparently according to my doctors I have to keep a 'positive head' on a all times. That's enough to make anyone feel sick. So I suppose what I should be writing is that its got to get worse before it gets better. So . . . I guess I'm getting better? Na, that's sounds just as bad on paper as it did in my head.Anyway, I guess i should probably start writing down the important stuff the doctor told me to. . .

Symptoms:

-Tiredness (a lot of it too)

-Nausea (threw up last night but haven't yet this morning.)

-Loss of appetite (i really don't want breakfast)

-Headaches

There was a knock on the door so I quickly stopped writing and stuffed the diary under my pillow. Maybe I should think about investing in a lock. I couldn't be bothered do anything so I continued to lay there, as if I hadn't moved all night. The person at the door didn't wait for permission to come in, just pushed open the door gently.
Eve stepped into my room, looking slightly distracted but had a smile on her face. I cringed on the inside. If only I could skip today . . .

oxoxoxoxoxoxox

Shane's POV

The old, slowly dying clock on the wall read 10:30am. The second hand was moving way too quickly for my liking. How come it never used to that at school? Damn I really couldn't afford to let Claire stay in bed much longer or we would be late. And it wouldn't be the first time.

I heard footsteps coming down the stairs, hoping they were Claire's but knowing by the heaviness and loudness of them that it was in fact Eve and her army boots. Claire, due to lack if appetite, had become very light and everything she did lately was all at a much slower pace, which was different because before she got sick she was like a bull in a china shop.

I know that it is all because of the medication she is on but it still scares me how quickly she has gone down hill. Its Tuesday today and the 6th time we will be making the trip to the hospital. I take Claire in at 11 o'clock every morning, with weekends off. Eve came alone once after she had convinced Claire and I that she would be able to handle it. But it had actually upset her more than either of us could of predicted. Needless to say Eve hasn't wanted to come again.

I am so glad that Claire is able to have weekends off because I've never seen her as bad as she was on the Friday before the last one. We had all been up the whole of Thursday night listening to Claire as she continuously emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet until she had nothing left and was dry heaving. I'd stayed with her the whole time, scared that if I left her for just a minute she would pass out from exhaustion. I'd sat next to her on the bathroom floor, muttering comforting phrases like 'Its okay' and 'It'll be over soon.' Though I'm pretty sure I was just trying to convince myself that that was the case. The next morning, the Friday, Claire hadn't even been able to muster up the energy to get out of bed. Eve and I had helped her get changed and Michael had carried her down to the car. I think the hospital is lending us a small wheel chair until Claire gets better.

Eve entered the kitchen and grabbed her coffee, downing it like it was a drug.

"Thats better." Eve sighed, taking a seat opposite me and putting her head on the table moaning "I hate mornings."

"You don't say." I reply sarcastically. Normally after I say something like that she would have some kind of fire back but she didn't. She didn't even move.

"Yo Gothica? Are you dead there?" I said, poking her arm. That got a response.

"Pee off Shane I'm not in the mood." She gave me the finger and went back to muttering her moans. At least that was the Eve I knew. I looked up at the clock again which now read 10:35am. I couldn't leave it any longer. Remind me to smash that clock when for being so patronizing later. I guess Morganville being small is a good thing, it doesn't take very long to get to places.

"Eve?"

"Oh what what what?" She shouted. Woah.

"Easy tiger! I was just gonna ask if you could go wake Claire up? We kinda have to go and I need to like put some stuff together." Was it just me or was Eve acting very very mean this morning? "You alright?" I ask.

"Yeah yeah, whatever." And with that she got up and left the round rubbing her face which had hardly any make up on. I guess I could sit her and ponder Eve's mysterious behavior but I had to find my phone. Urg this was not going to be a good day.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Claire's POV

"Morning CB." Said Eve as she sat on the end of my bed. "You know you have to get up at some point today right?"

I pretended to be asleep. I felt the weight on the bed shift and suddenly I was aware that Eve was lying next to me, probably staring up at the ceiling. "I wish that I could stay like this too, just not have to move at all. Don't think I don't know how you're feeling."

I remained still. But when Eve didn't continue I opened my eyes and, sharing at the ceiling, mirrored her. In a mono-toned voice, as if it were obvious, I said "You have no idea how I feel."

My best friend sighed and rolled over, propping her head up on her hand. "I know. Maybe I don't, but we all have problems Claire." Eve replied.

I just wanted to be alone. I didn't want her in here with me. I wanted to sleep until this nightmare was over and then wake up in Shane's arms, having him tell me that it was all a dream, that I was safe now.

I didn't tell this to Eve. I said nothing like it. But when I did speak, the words I said were words I didn't think I was capable of speaking.

"You're problems are nothing compared to mine."

The room seemed to go completely still. It was as if even the wind had stopped blowing. What I said was true. I was dying for goodness sake. Nothing could top that. I should be feeling guilty, but I don't. I'd finally said what I had been keeping in all this time. Nothing else mattered any more. No one else mattered.

Eve got off my bed and I sat up, watching her move towards the door. Her shoulders were slumped and her walk was not a bold as it normally was. Her black hair fell limp on her shoulders which were covered in a simple black cardigan. Eve put one hand on the door knob, her red painted fingers clutching at it as she twisted it, the door opening. Before leaving she turned back to me saying,

"You have radiotherapy in fifteen minutes. You better get your ass out of bed at some point in the next few minutes if you are going to have any chance of your 'problem' getting any better." I stared at Eve. How could she be so mean to me? My friend didn't leave straight away. She looked like she wanted to say something else, but after a moments hesitation she turned on her heel and left.

I pulled out my diary from under my pillow, picked up my pen and began to write again.

So, it turns out its not just the world that hates me . . .

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Eve's POV

I stormed down the stairs and grabbed my coat from the hanger. I pushed the kitchen door open forcefully, shouting in at Shane.

"Claire may or may not be coming down at any point during today. Bye!" With out waiting to here my roommates response I turned and made my way to the front door, picking up my bag from the stairs on the way.

I heard Shane shout after me. "Where are you going?

"Out!" I yelled back, putting in extra effort when I slammed the front door shut behind me.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

I was sat in the waiting room of the local Doctors, picking at my red nail varnish nervously. Yeah I know I said that coming to the doctors had been my last resort but I've run out of other options. I'd rather know now than spend the rest of my life wondering if I am just trying for no reason. I may only be 20 years old but like I said, its something I've always wanted.

I picked up one of those cheesy fashion magazines and began to flip through it. Urg the stuff is here was so much of a cliche. I mean the things in here are way to slutty, and not in a good way. This morning I'd come in at about 11 0'clock and now it was 4:30pm. I know, its a long time but I wanted to get my test results today. The doctor I saw said it would be easier tomorrow but I refused. I wanted to get it over with.

"Eve Glass?" Came a a female voice. I looked up from the magazine to see Dr Auralee, I think that's her name anyway. "I have your results. If you'd like to come this way?"

I took a deep breath and stood up, following her into one of the side room. The tall blonde doctor smiled at me as she opened the door to allow me to step in. The room was bright white. In the corner was one of those substitute beds with the uncomfortable paper on it that breaks every time you sit down. I sat down on one of the chairs by the computer.

"Okay Eve, here's what came back." The doctor sat down opposite me. "The blood test are not too much of a concern, though your hormone levels were slightly off. But I wouldn't worry about that as it may not make a difference. It is only very slight." Next Dr Auralee showed me a picture on her ipad. It didn't really make much sense to me but I looked at it with fake interest.

"And what does this show?" I asked politely.

"Well," She started. "The Hysterosalpingography did show something that worried me slightly." I held my breath. "It shows the your Fallopian it blocked. Now this can be worked out but - "

"But what does this mean for me?" I cut in. "Right now." Even though I asked this, I think I already knew the answer.

"Right now," Dr Auralee leaned forward a bit and her voice became gentler. "With these test results and your family history, it may be hard for you to ever become pregnant."

Her words lay still in the air for a while. This was what I'd been dreading. I've always wanted children, and now I've just been told that the chances of me ever being able to have any is very low. This isn't how I wanted things to be.

"There is a chance that you will be able to conceive, but it's not going to be as easy as it would be for other women. There are treatments that can . . . "

". . . I think I'd like to go home now." I said quietly.

"Of course."The doctor replied kindly. "Just phone in and make a follow up appointment and we can talk more about it."

"Okay. Thank you." I said before standing up and leaving. I felt like I was walking on air. How was I going to tell Michael. We knew that we were going to have problems, him being a vampire and all, but now it wasn't just him that was the problem. It was me.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Claire's POV

"I can't remember a time I wasn't throwing up." I said miserably from the bathroom floor. Shane sat down opposite me, leaning against the bath tub.

"I wish I could take this away from you." He said sadly.

"I know you do, but I'd rather it be me than you." I told him. He smiled and leaned forward to kiss me on the head.

"My brave brave girl." Said Shane. I really didn't deserve him.

"What makes you say that?" He asked. I must have said it out loud.

I sighed. I guess I should probably tell him. Maybe he can help me work it out. "I'm a bad person. I think Eve and I fell out this morning. I kind of said something mean to her." I explained the events of this morning to him. The truth was, after about 30 minutes of it happening, while I was lying under a laser, I began to feel guilty. I mean Eve is someone who doesn't opens up about her true feelings very often and I think this morning she was trying to. And I told her I didn't care. What kind of a best friend was I?

"Thinking about it Eve has seemed a bit off lately." Shane muttered.

As I was about to reply I heard the slam of the front room door and footsteps that seemed to be running up the stairs.

"Eve's home."

"Yeah." I stood up, putting a hand to my head. "I guess I should go talk to her."

Shane stood up too and grabbed my arm. "Or maybe you should go lay down for a bit. Your last episode there was pretty intense."

"No, I wouldn't be able to sleep with this on my conscience anyway." I left Shane there and made my way to the end of the corridor where Eve's room was. I lent in to knock on the door but stop when I heard the sound of sobbing.

I gently pushed open the door and poked my head in. Eve's curtains were pulled so the already dark room was darker than normal. Eve lay on her bed, motionless other than her shoulders shaking. Sighing, I closed the door and turned the light on.

"Eve."

She lifted her head off the pillow to look at me and in a tired tone said "Go away Claire. I'm not in the mood." But I didn't go away. Instead, I came and sat next to her, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, scared that I was going to cry too. "I didn't mean what I said earlier. Your problems do matter. You matter."

I waited as Eve sat up slowly, crossing her legs and putting her pillow in her lap. "Okay. I'm sorry too. For not being there for you."

"What do you mean?" I gasped. "You've been nothing but supportive!" Eve didn't reply, she just looked down at her lap.

"So," I started slowly. "Do you want to tell me why you are crying?"

Eve didn't look up. She also didn't say anything. "Look, Eve, you can tell me. I'm your best friend. I'll always listen to you."

The tear stained girl opposite finally lifted her head and took a deep breath. "Today I, um, went to the doctors surgery and had some tests done."

I didn't interrupt, I just let her get her composure back and continue, although I didn't like where this was going.

"Claire, I can't have children." My best friend broke down in tears again.

"Oh Eve . . ." I muttered and pulled her into a hug. She sobbed in my arms and I began to cry silently too. I knew how much having kids meant to Eve and for that to be taken away from her? That was just cruel.

"I'm so sorry babe." I told her as she pulled away. "Is it for definite?"

"Well, the doctor said that there is a chance I could still get pregnant in the future, but with my family history and the test results it going to be hard." Eve laughed dryly. "Its ironic really. Not that long ago we talking like this, only it was you thinking that you were pregnant, and now its me, who can't get pregnant."

I just hugged her again. "We'll get through this Eve." I told her. "We'll find a way."

I felt Eve sigh against my neck.

"I hope you're right."