Chapter Sixty Seven

"You seem different," Loki said. "Are you alright?"

"Yes," I said. It wasn't completely a lie. Yes, I was still in a war. I had no idea who I was anymore. But today had been amazing. It was probably our best day of battle since the war started. The other side didn't expect it. We had about three times more angels than we had before. It was amazing. They were still pissed at Cas, but they easily forgave him. Gabriel led the army now. Lucifer was very surprised when he saw him on the battlefield.

And the Doctor was back.

To celebrate our victory, I went to visit Loki. It's been a while since I've visited him. He was king of Asgard now. We stood in the library, talking.

"You're doing it, again," he remarked quietly. He was skimming his hand among the books. I sat in a chair, facing the fire.

"Doing what?" I murmured.

He stopped moving. "Tell me something, Rissa. What do they call me? On Earth?"

"The trickster god. The god of lies, and mischief, and chaos," I said immediately. I didn't like lying to Loki. Then again, I was keeping the war hidden from him. But I had no reason to hide something like this from him.

"The god of lies…" he said quietly. "I've lied a lot in my life, Rissa. And I know how to spot one." He turned and faced me. "You're hiding something. And you've kept it hidden for a while."

His face softened slightly as he looked at me. "Tell me, how old are you?"

"Twenty," I said.

Twenty. Hard to believe it's been five years since I've met the Doctor.

"It's hard to believe that you're still the same girl that I grew up with," Loki said, coming closer. "And yet…I still see her when I look at you. But you don't look twenty. You look older. You have one of those faces. Where you see the young girl who you grew up with, but you see the sad stranger that you now are. You act sadder, and wiser. And it seems as if you carry the fate of a thousand souls."

I said nothing.

"Rissa," Loki sighed. It seemed that he has grown up too. He rarely gets mad anymore. "What are you keeping from me?"

"I promise that I'll tell you everything," I said, getting up and moving closer to him. I faced him down, and I felt the fire on my back, giving me courage. "But now is not the time. You will find out. But you've lived hundreds of years. Be patient, will you?"

Loki and I stood eye to eye. Sort of. I wasn't as short as I was before. Well, I was still shorter than him, because he was like 6 feet 2 inches, but I was five eight.

I was not the same person that he saw hiding around a post.

I was different.

I wonder if I had reached that point. If I became the monster yet.

I wonder if I became the villain to my own story.

...

"You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain."

- Two Faced, The Dark Knight