AUTHOR'S NOTE: OK THIS IS FOR THE TWO PEOPLE THAT ASKED ME TO KEEP THE FOCUS ON SAM, WELL, HERE'S THE THING. I CAN'T. SIMPLY BECAUSE I'M NOT TELLING THIS STORY FROM SAM'S POV, I'M TELLING IT FROM A NARRATIVE PERSPECTIVE i.e. THIRD PERSON. I DON'T LIKE TO FOCUS TOO MUCH ON ONE PARTICULAR CHARACTER IN A STORY, BECAUSE IT CAN BECOME …WELL BORING. I LIKE TO FOCUS ON THE COUPLE THEMSELVES AND MAYBE A COUPLE OF MAIN CHARACTERS. TO ME IT KEEPS THINGS FRESH IF THE STORY DOESN'T JUST FOCUS ON ONE OR TWO PEOPLE. THINK OF IT AS HAVING A MAGNIFYING GLASS OVER A MOUND OF ANTS, HOLD IT OVER ONE OR TWO FOR TOO LONG AND THEY FIZZLE AND BURN OUT QUICKLY. SO I HOPE I DON'T UPSET ANYONE BY THIS, BUT I FEEL I MUST MAKE MYSELF BE UNDERSTOOD SINCE I CAN'T PM A GUEST.
…now for the next chapter
Blaine is sitting under the tree where he and Kurt buried Pavarotti, the Warbler Bird that died just before they got together. He stares at the small marker they made together as his mind drifts to all of the happiness he felt that came with being Kurt's boyfriend. The day they met, their first kiss, the first time they said "I love you," to each other, all of the memories are playing on an infinite loop in his mind.
"I miss you so much, Kurt" This is the first time he's found himself talking to a ghost.
He takes a seat at the trunk of the tree, with his legs drawn towards his chest. He runs his hands over his face and scoffs. "I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I feel like I'm trying to put on this brave face and move on with my life, but I'm not. I'm…" he thinks as he tries to find the words, "…just trying to keep breathing." He thinks of the past few weeks and the events that have occurred since Kurt died. "Sam's become my best friend, but something's happened between us." He takes a deep breath, trying his hardest not to cry. "I feel like Sam is pulling away from me ever since I told him I was thinking about asking out Sebastian. …Yeah I know what you would say about that, Kurt. But, he's actually really funny, and nice once you get to know him. I don't know." He huffs. "Maybe if anything, he can be the rebound guy and then I'll finally be able to move on from you, Kurt." For a moment, he thinks he can feel Kurt holding his hand, and he smiles.
…
"RACHEL!" Sam yells down the hall as he runs after his friend.
Rachel stops and turns with a smile beaming from her face as she sees Sam approaching her. When he gets to her she can tell he has something important to discuss. "What's up, Sam?"
He pulls out a brochure for a weekend camp. "Look what I found. It's a place that will help me get rid of my … you know feelings."
Rachel's eyes go wide and she snatches the brochure from Sam, shredding it before he can take it back.
"What did you do that for?" Sam asks demandingly.
Rachel stomps he foot and grabs Sam's shirt collar, pulling him to her level. "Sam, those people aren't going to help you do anything."
Sam sighs heavily, feeling disappointed. "But I don't want to be gay."
Rachel hugs him quickly. "Sam, if you're gay, then you're gay. Nothing can change that." She can see the hurt and fear in his eyes. "Sam," she says softly, "I know this is confusing, and something you never thought would happen to you."
"It's not," he says fighting his tears. His mind is on Blaine and how badly he wants to be with him.
"What do you mean?" She asks feeling like she's missed something.
Sam takes a deep breath and slowly exhales. "I mean, I've thought about it before…when I was at my old school, you know the all-boys boarding school." He sees the expression on her face show a glimmer of surprise. "My roommate and I were prowling for chicks one night and we met these two girls that wanted to see us kiss, and then they'd make out with us."
"So you kissed him?" Rachel asks curiously.
Sam shakes his head. "No he kissed me…but then they laughed at us and ran off. Anyways, later that night I dreamed he and I were kissing again. Then my dad got the job here and to save money, he transferred me to McKinley and the rest is history."
Rachel stands there dumbfounded. "Wow, I…never thought you…I mean that is to say…"
"It's ok, Rachel, I never thought I'd be gay either." Sam says being blunt.
…..
Blaine is sitting at the Lima Bean; his mind is full of memories of Kurt. He reaches for his phone and checks for a message from Sam that would explain his tardiness. He click's on Sam's contact info and composes a text.
BLAINE: ARE WE STILL ON FOR COFFEE?
Thirty minutes pass. He sends another text.
BLAINE: YOU OK?
Fifteen more minutes pass, another text is sent.
BLAINE: ARE YOU MAD AT ME? DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG?
Ten minutes go by quickly.
BLAINE: SAM, PLEASE CALL ME!
Five minutes. Blaine's eyes begin to feel with tears as he begins to feel as if he's been abandoned.
BLAINE: SAM! I'M BEGGING YOU! PLEASE JUST LET ME KNOW YOU'RE OK!
Another minute passes and Blaine grabs his phone and puts it in his pocket before throwing away his now empty coffee cup.
He feels his phone vibrate once, just as he walks to his car.
SAM: SORRY. I CAN'T.
Blaine climbs inside and starts the engine, just as his tears begin to flood down his face.
If Blaine had only looked to the left, just three cars down, he would have seen Sam in his car, hidden away so that he would not be seen by his friend. Sam is also crying as he reads the texts that Blaine had sent them. He hated himself for doing this to Blaine, but he needed the distance to figure out things. He didn't want to be gay, but with each passing day, his feelings for Blaine grew and to make things worse he caught himself checking out Finn and Puck while they were working out earlier and all he could do was hate himself further. The only thing he wants he can't have and until he can get it he believes he will never again be ok with who he is, who he's becoming.
….
A few days pass and Blaine is starting to revert back into the person he was after Kurt died. He's snapped at Mercedes and called her so many different fat names he's all but caused her to give up eating. He's already gotten an after glee detention with Will and Emma. He's tried to talk to Sam, but he keeps getting the same excuse. "I'm busy" of "I've gotta meat up with so and so" are all Sam will say to him.
He sits in glee while Sam steps up to perform a number. As the music begins he catches Sam looking at the girls in the room, especially Rachel.
(BOYFRIEND BY JUSTIN BIEBER PERFORED BY SAM EVANS featuring Artie Abrams and Mike Chang as the backup vocals in in the chorus)
If I was your boyfriend, I'd never let you go
I can take you places you ain't never been before
Baby, take a chance or you'll never ever know
I got money in my hands that I'd really like to blow
Swag, swag, swag, on you
Chillin' by the fire while we eatin' fondue
I don't know about me but I know about you
So say hello to falsetto in three, two, swag
Sam dances around the stage with the Cheerios backing him up.
I'd like to be everything you want
Hey girl, let me talk to you
Rachel is sitting right in front of Blaine, so he thinks Sam is singing to her. He looks over at Finn and can't help but think the male lead of glee had to be the biggest idiot. This made things make sense to him though. As Sam sings, Blaine wonders if him having feelings is the reason he's been avoiding him.
If I was your boyfriend, never let you go
Keep you on my arm girl, you'd never be alone
I can be a gentleman, anything you want
If I was your boyfriend, I'd never let you go, I'd never let you go
Mercedes and Quinn, like Blaine, naturally assume that their ex-boyfriend is singing to Rachel Berry, which makes Mercedes feel disgusted with Sam, and Quinn feeling disgusted with herself.
Tell me what you like yeah tell me what you don't
I could be your Buzz Lightyear, fly across the globe
I don't ever wanna fight yeah, you already know
Imma make you shine bright like you're laying in the snow
Burr
Girlfriend, girlfriend, you could be my girlfriend
You could be my girlfriend until the w-w-world ends
Make you dance do a spin and a twirl and
Voice goin crazy on this hook like a whirlwind
Swaggie
As Sam dances and sings, he has the other girls swooning over him, save for Tina, who give Mike her undivided attention when he and Sam do a dance duet while Artie harmonizes in the background. Mike fades back next to Artie as the chorus returns.
I'd like to be everything you want
Hey girl, let me talk to you
Sam smiles as he looks at Blaine, who still hasn't realized this song is for him.
If I was your boyfriend, never let you go
Keep you on my arm girl, you'd never be alone
I can be a gentleman, anything you want
If I was your boyfriend, I'd never let you go, I'd never let you go
Rachel starts to notice the looks Mercedes and Quinn are giving her and she shrinks into her seat a bit. Then she gazes over her shoulder and sees Blaine's leaned down to whisper into her ear. "I bet Finn would love to know that his girlfriend is a cheater. Give me back my friend or I'm telling him about the two of you." She shutters and quickly exits the auditorium as Sam finishes the song.
If I was your boyfriend (boyfriend), never let you go
Keep you on my arm girl, you'd never be alone (never be alone)
I can be a gentleman (gentleman), anything you want
If I was your boyfriend (boyfriend), I'd never let you go, never let you go
Na na na, na na na, na na na
Yeah girl
Na na na, na na na, na na na ey
If I was your boyfriend
Na na na, na na na, na na na ey
Na na na, na na na, na na na ey
If I was your boyfriend
When the song ends Finn runs out after Rachel. Sam wants to go after her too, but he's blocked by Quinn and Mercedes who pull him away so that they can talk in private. He feels a rush of panic overtaking him as they both begin to yell at him. He can tell by the looks in their eyes that they know and he regrets singing the entirety of the song to Blaine.
"I can't believe you Sam! I never thought you were like that!" Mercedes says angrily.
Quinn is right in his face, her face full of anger. "Is this why you kissed me?!" She says with bite in her voice.
"I'm sorry. I never thought I'd feel this way about him." He says feeling shameful for any way that he might have hurt either of his exes.
Quinn and Mercedes' eyes just about pop out of their heads and they have to scrape their jaws off the floor. "HIM!?"
Sam's face gives away that he hadn't meant to say that last word. They watch as he collapses to floor and cries in the fetal position, hiding his face in shame. Both girls fall to his side and begin to comfort him. They look at each other and realize that they made a mistake in cornering Sam and getting on to him for something they were just assuming.
…
Outside the school Finn finally catches up to Rachel. "Rachel, slow down, what happened?"
She hugs him, crying. She pulls away for a moment "I can't tell you. It's not my secret to share."
"Rachel what's wrong?" Finn says with sympathy filled eyes.
Rachel wipes her eyes. "Blaine, thinks that I'm having an affair with Sam, and he's going to tell you that he and I are fooling around behind your back if I don't fix things between him and Sam."
Finn takes a step back. "Sam likes Blaine doesn't he?"
Rachel finds herself speechless.
Finn hugs her. "I figured it out when Sam was singing that Bieber song. I could tell most people thought he was singing to you, but then I followed his eyes, and either he was singing to your headband or he was singing to Blaine."
"Finn, you can't tell Sam you know!" She says hastily.
"Why not?" Finn asks thinking Sam would be relieved to have another friend that knows the truth.
Rachel sighs, "Because he's scared of his feelings, and he actually was thinking about going to one of those degayification camps this weekend, until I talked him out of it."
"OK, I won't say anything until Sam is ready to talk about it." Finn says kissing the top of her head,
"Thank you." She says smiling.
….
Blaine walks out of his detention and pulls out his phone and dials the person he's wanted to call for days now. "Sebastian, hey…listen I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite to eat this Friday and go see a movie or do something? ….Yes it's an actual date….OK great, I'll pick you up around six thirty and we'll go out….OK cool, talk to you later then…bye." Blaine hangs up and begins to text Sam.
BLAINE: HEY I KNOW YOU'RE MAD AT ME OR WHATEVER, BUT I WANTED TO TELL YOU I ASKED SEBASTIAN OUT AND HE SAID YES! WE'RE GOING OUT ON FRIDAY! JUST WISH I HAD MY BEST FRIEND TO TALK TO ABOUT IT.
Blaine presses send and puts his phone away as he walks out to his car. He feels his phone buzz in his pocket and he fishes it out again.
SAM: THAT'S SO AWESOME. WITH QUINN AND MERCEDES. WILL CALL YOU LATER TO TALK. SORRY FOR BEING SO DISTANT LATELY. I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH SOMETHING PERSONAL.
Blaine smiles at the text and puts the phone in the passenger seat as he drives off.
Sam stands in the doorway of front exit of the school crying as Quinn and Mercedes try and comfort him.
AUTHOR'S OTHER NOTE
OK I REALLY ENJOYED WRITING THIS CHAPTER AND I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED IT AS WELL. ALL REVIEWS ARE WELCOME AND I AM THANKFUL FOR THEM WHEN I GET THEM.