I feel like I'm constantly apologizing for not updating in forever, but this week I have no excuse. I had planned to write this chapter last Sunday as I was free all day, and then at like 7:3opm I was just sat in my frontroom trying to remember what I was I had supposed to do that day. Oops yeah my memory is definitely not the best, ask anyone xx One of my many charms lol xxx Anyway this is the 3rd to last chapter so I hope you enjoy it, can't wait to here from you all agai x

Thalia's Tre

Disclaimer; I do not own Morganville Vampires, and of the song I include in this fanfiction or any of the poems used :)

Claire's POV

Its not long now before I have surgery. The day I have been both dreading and waiting for.

For the last few days I have been having countless tests done to check everything is else is okay. I had a blood test done two days to check my general health and to double check my blood group, and the day before that I had a chest x-ray and an ECG. Quite a few of the test done were pretty much just observations to be honest. They were pretty similar to the ones I had when I was diagnosed. Now and again a nurse would come over and ask me questions to see how alert I am, ask me the squeeze her hand and, annoyingly, shine a bright light into my eyes to see how my pupils would react. How did they think they would react? Jump out of my eyes and start dancing? Yeah right.

I looked up at the clock which read 6:30pm. My surgery is tomorrow morning at 11:30am. I was instructed earlier today that I will not be allowed to eat or drink anything after midnight in preparation, so I should have a snack soon. But I didn't feel like eating at all. I was so nervous. This time tomorrow, I will either be free of my brain cancer or I will be . . . dead, I guess.

I looked down at my hand which were shaking. I wish that Shane was here, but he and the others and gone home to grab some extra stuff I might need after the surgery. Things that I wasn't really sure were even necessary. They felt just as helpless as I did. I loved them so much for doing everything for me that I wasn't able to do, but right now I just want them to be here to take my mind off everything for a little while.

Everybody was so optimistic, talking about how it was all almost over, how I would be free soon. It was almost as if no one had actually realised that I might not come out of the operation room alive. No one but me had realised that.

And even if I did make if, even if I do survive, the battle will be far from over. I will have to go through months, maybe even years of extra treatments to get me back on my feet. The doctor told me earlier in my briefing that its not unusual for me to wake up after surgery and feel worse than I did before. What is the point in that? I wont be able to do things afterward that I can do now, with a brain tumour! I won't even be able to cough at first because that will increase the pressure in my head!

So I can't walk that far now without getting light headed, but at least I can walk by myself. I won't be able to do that for a while. I will need someone with me constantly at first so that I don't hurt myself. I'm so grateful for the support of my friends, but I can't help feel guilty. Shane has quite his job so that when I come home he can be there for me. Romantic, yes. Practical, no.

I sigh and begin to play with the white sheet that covers me. I know what you are probably thinking, in bed at 6:30pm? What normal teenager is in bed at that time? Hi! That would be me, currently. But I have an excuse.

I won't get to pull the 'I have cancer' card after my surgery, so I guess I'll have to start getting used to getting up off my lazy but to get my own things when I get back home. When I said that to Shane, he laughed.

I notice that the moon is out tonight. Not a full moon, more of a Waning Gibbous moon. I smiled to myself, figuring that I had actually learnt something in GCSE Astronomy after all.

Its weird to think that at this moment in time, somebody else, somewhere else, I looking up at the night sky, staring at the exact same moon that I am staring at.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Shane's POV

I got out of Michael's car and looked up at the night sky. No quite a full moon. The stars were out and they seemed to be shinning brighter than ever. I shook myself out of my thoughts, figuring that this was no time to get sentimental. I had a job to do.

"Okay, ground rules." Eve stated as she slammed the car door shut. She looked scary in the moonlight with her gothic clothes and makeup. Granted, she had toned it down a bit, but only due to the fact that she didn't have that much time in the mornings anymore. "Neither one of you boys are going through CB's underwear draw got it? She would kill me if I let you do that."

Michael moved around from the drivers side and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Okay." He answers. And then in a low, sexy voice he mumbled. "I've already seen whats in yours."

"Okay, okay, spare me the details!" I exclaimed, covering my ears dramatically. I smirked at them to let them know I was kidding and they laughed too. Together we made our way in the Glass house, which welcomed us with a warm breeze as we walked through the front door. It kind of felt weird walking into this house now, it felt alien. I hadn't spent a lot of time here lately to be honest. I would wake up early and go to the hospital to see Claire, leave when visiting times were over and take a long drive around to clear my head before arriving home late in the evening. I pretty much just slept in the house now, I didn't really live in it.

"You in there Shane?" I heard Eve say from behind me. I realised that I was blocking the doorway.

"Oh sorry, yeah." I cleared my throat. "Why don't you go on upstairs and start packing Claire's stuff? I'll be up in a moment."

I turned to look at Eve when she hesitated. I could tell she wanted to question me but when she saw the look in my eyes she wisely decided not to. Nodding she squeezed my shoulder as she walked past me and up the stairs.

I let out a breath and made my way into the front room. Pictures sat on the mantle piece and hung from the walls, depicting our once happy lives. Well, I know being hunted down by every evil vampire in town isn't everyone's schema of 'happy', but we weren't dying. We came close to death, and sometimes too close, but were weren't dying.

Before Claire moved to town, I was a dead guy, slowly returning to the living world. And Claire was a big part of that. She reminded me of how to love, and how to be loved. I used to think that maybe I just wasn't meant for love, seeing as everyone I had ever loved or had ever loved me had died. But Claire, showed me that that wasn't the case.

I had fallen in love with her. I had broken a promise I had made to myself after Lyss and mum died, and I had fallen in love. But I was the best thing I had ever done.

But now the person that meant everything to me was dying. Really dying. I had known this for a while obviously, but now, the night before her surgery, it had just registered that I might actually lose her. Because tomorrow was the turning point. Either it will be the beginning of her getting better or it will be the end of her life. And the end of mine.

I was a guy, slowly starting the live again, in love with a girl who was slowly dying. And we had found each other at a crossroad between dead and alive. I don't believe in fate, but I believe that we were meant to be.

"You alright bro?"

I turned to see Michael leaned against the door frame, arms crossed over his chest. When I turned back I realised that I had been staring at a picture of Claire and I when we had all gone on a road trip to Dallas.

"Yeah." I replied once I had regained my composure. "I'm good."

"You sure?" When I nodded he sighed. "This time tomorrow it will all be over."

"I'm just worried about what will be over." I muttered so he didn't hear. Oh yeah, I momentarily forgot that Mikey here was a vampire.

"What do you mean?" He questioned, frowning. When I tried to shake it off and go upstairs, Michael stopped me. "Seriously Shane."

"I just mean, what if . . . I mean there is always a chance she won't - make it." I trialed off, not really knowing how to express my thoughts. Guys weren't really very good at that.

"There is always a risk in surgery, you know that and so does Claire."

"I know, but it doesn't matter. She's going to make. I know she will." I said confidently, even though I was shaking with fear inside.

Michael moved forward and put a hand on my shoulder. "Of course she will."

"She has to."I replied, before moving passed him and going upstairs to help Eve with the packing.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Eve's POV

The three of us walked along the hospital corridor, a route that had become all too familiar. Nobody spoke, we just let the silence take over for once. Shane was being uncharacteristically quiet, but I didn't call him out for it. He had a lot on his mind, I knew that and it was probably best to let him figure it out before asking him to open up.

There was only 35 minutes left of visiting time. We weren't allowed to stay over night, only family were allowed to do that. Claire's parents had been informed of the surgery date and promised to try and do their best to get here. I hoped for Claire's sake that they made it here by tomorrow morning.

"Hold on," Michael whispered as we reached Claire's hospital. "Listen."

I did listen, but what I heard broke my heart.

Claire was crying, and talking, but I knew that she wasn't talking to anyone in the room. Stepping forward I pushed open the door slightly so we could peer in, but didn't disturb our sobbing friend. When Shane went to walk in Michael held our his arm, silently telling him stop and listen to what she was saying.

Claire was not in bed like how we had left her, but she had moved so that she was kneeling on the floor, elbows on the bed in a praying position. That's what she was doing, praying. I concentrated on what Claire was saying.

"I know that I don't deserve to be asking much from you, but I don't know what else to do. I know that I have abandoned and neglected you the lately and acted like you don't exist but that's just because I figured talking to you wouldn't do much good. And I'm sorry for that, I'm really really sorry."

"She is praying to God." I whispered, so that only the boys would hear.

"No." Shane whispered back. "She is praying to her angels."

"I feel like I used to rely on you for everything. Each one of you had your own special job, and depending on what the situation was, I would decide who I would pray to. But I realise now that I would pray for silly little things like helping me through a test. Now I realise why we have angels, you are here for times like this. For times when people like me are completely confused as to why things happen. " I saw a stray tear fall down my best friend's face as she tried to gather her thoughts. "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm scared. Really scared and I need you to let me know that everything is going to be okay."

"I can't stand here and listen to this." Shane muttered, but once again we stopped him from barging in. It was important for Claire to get her feelings out. And what she might be saying is something she might not be able to say to us.

"I might die tomorrow. I might die in surgery, but if I withdraw my consent I will die anyway. And I can't do that to my friends."

I tensed, getting a feeling that I wasn't necessarily going to like what I was about to hear.

Claire let out a sigh and wiped away her tears before continuing. "They do so much for me, and I feel like I never do anything for them. All I do is cause them unnecessary grief and pain. If it wasn't for me and this stupid tumour then everyone would be a lot happier. I wish they didn't have to go through this. I should be the only one feeling the pain, but I'm passing it onto them."

She didn't say anything for a while and she just cried a bit. Michael was about to tell us to go in when she suddenly spoke again. "Please look after me tomorrow. Don't let me be by myself. I don't know what it will feel like and I'm scared of the black void that awaits me. I may be smart, but even I don't know what happens next. What if . . . what if I fall asleep and never wake up? Will I know that I'm asleep? Will that be it for the rest of eternity, or is there something else after life? Because I believe there is, I mean there must be. If there wasn't then so many lives would just go to waste. But there is always the chance that heaven and hell are made up, just to give people's lives a meaning and purpose. We could all believe in an afterlife, only to find out that when we die there is actually nothing there for us. It was all make believe, a fantasy."

Claire, laughed but it was a bitter laugh, one that didn't suit her. "We all believe in fantasies, even if we don't realise it at the time. We once believed in things like Santa Claus and the tooth fairy, and those things made us so innocent. We were unaware of the things life could throw at us at that age. We didn't know that life could bring us sadness. But the biggest fantasy of them all is believing that we will wake up every morning. And the only way we figure out that this isn't the case is when we don't, and by then its too late. We believe we are safe, but really we are not.

"So, without wasting anymore of your time, I'll just ask one thing. Tomorrow, while I'm in surgery tomorrow, don't just comfort me, comfort my friends and family too. Because even though I'm the one getting my head cut open, I will be unconscious, whereas they will have to go through all the worry before I wake up. So yeah, look after them please. Thank angels, I love you so much." With that Claire let out a sob and her shoulders began to shake.

"Okay, that's it." Shane said as he went through the door. Neither Michael nor I moved to stopped him. We were to shocked by what we had heard to react.

oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Shane's POV

"Claire its okay don't cry." I begged as I made my way towards her shaking form.

She didn't react to my voice at first, just remained in the same position. For some reason I figured that she didn't want to turn around because she was too embarrassed to, and I felt guilty for making her feel that way. I put my hands gently on her shoulders so I didn't startle her, and that's all it took for her to completely break down. I pulled her into my arms and held her tightly, letting her know that I wasn't going anywhere.

"Shh, its okay I'm here." I whispered into her ear.

"Please don't leave me." She sobbed into my shoulder.

"Right back at you." I replied softly. We sat there for a while, both of us on the cold floor, much like we had been when my father had died. I had forgotten that Eve and Michael were in the room. Figuring that this wasn't the best place for Claire to be at the moment I began to move.

"Come on lets get you up." I coaxed. Eve came forward and helped me lift Claire up onto the bed. I hated seeing her like this, so vulnerable and scared.

Claire sat up straighter when I sat next to her. Eve came and sat at the end of the bed facing us with her legs crossed, and Michael sat on the edge next to her.

"Sorry, I really didn't want you to see that." Claire joked, wiped her eyes with a tissue Eve had passed her.

"Well we've always had a talent at bad timing." I replied with a laugh. It seemed to lighten the mood. I look at Claire, whose eyes were still teary but her smile was genuine.

"You probably think I'm crazy." She said as she looked down at her lap.

"Oh we already knew you were crazy." Michael replied. "I knew that the moment I let you live in the Glass house." Eve hit her husband's arm and he pretended to be hurt. "Sorry, I'll behave."

"Good." Eve said. Then she turned her attention to Claire. "What makes you think that?"

"It's just, well . . . " She continued playing with the bedding, a habit she had picked up lately. "I'm getting life saving treatment tomorrow, and I'm crying when I should be happy!"

"You're scared that's all." I said gently as I rubbed her back. "And that's okay."

"Yeah CB, surgery is scary stuff." Eve agreed, leaning forward and prying Claire's figures way from the sheets so she could hold her best friend's hands. "But it's going to be fine. The doctor has reassured us that the surgeons operating on you are the best of the best!"

"And we will be in the family unit watching over you the whole time." Michael added with a smile.

"Your angels will be there too." I said to her. My fiancee's head snapped towards me, suspicion written all over her beautiful face. She knows that I'm not religious and I don't really believe in God or angels, but I've see how much they mean to her. When she saw that I wasn't being sarcastic she smiled and leaned into my chest. I stroked her hair comfortingly.

"Thank you." She said quietly. "All of you. I couldn't have faced this without you."

"We would never have left you to do this by yourself." I promised, kissing her forehead. "You're strong Claire, but you are stronger with us."

"Yes." She said without hesitation. "I know that now."

We all nodded at that, finally glad that Claire was willing to accept a little more help. After a moment of everyone being lost in their own thoughts, Eve stated, "I think this calls for a group hug!"

"Why not." I agreed. "I'm feeling sentimental."

In our little circle we huddled close to each other, hugging one another while laughing. Sounds cheesy, I know, but I honestly didn't care. We needed each other, we always have done. And right now wasn't any different.

Tomorrow was going to be hard. It was going to be hard on all of us. But right now, at this moment in time, we didn't need to worry about it. All we need to worry about was keeping our spirits up.

Because nothing makes a tough situation worse than sadness.

Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice. But for those who love, life is eternity.