Katekyo Hitman Reborn

My Fate is Certainly Uncertain

Special Chapter!

Warnings: Story ending. Seriously, now it's stopping. *Is crying like a bear*

[Written to: First Date/ Last Night - Dogfight]

~o0o~

Author's note:

Well, this story has come to it's final day. It's really sad to say that my life will be very different, with something so strong not to write about anymore. I said this before, when someone asked me about the relationships that could have been with Phillipa. Originally, Squalo was meant to be, but later got changed due to story development decisions. A lot of the things that I planned have been right from the start. I distinctly remember sitting in my bed at two, three, five in the morning, frantically writing how this could be done, or how it could change. As a thank you, I've written this as my last chapter. Peace.

~o0o~

Superbi Squalo.

He was born into this blessed, peaceful environment on a March afternoon, as it rained. Screaming he came and this world that heard quieter things was shattered for his parents. Someone said once that he slept peacefully the first night he came home, but that wasn't at all certain. It wasn't characteristic of his aggressive, outstanding demeanor.

At a year old, his father babysat him for the first time. They didn't have maids or anything like that, but his wife was out of the country, doing business with some people from Albania, so he had no choice. He wasn't going to waste his money on a babysitter anyway, so he took the baby Squalo out with him on the mission. As a free hitman, he got a steady income, so the job wasn't a hassle, nor was it terribly worrying. Bloody, at the least but that comes with the territory. Squalo had a good time, from what he could tell. Not that he could talk.

It wasn't until he was two, and even then he was awkwardly confident in his actions. He yelled all the time, demanding things of his mother. It continued like this for many years, until one day he had to stop and start doing everything by himself.

School was school. He got good grades and took fencing as an elective, practicing it in his spare time till his limbs were sore, body drenched in a sticky sweat that stained and stunk. Didn't really talk to anyone, since nobody there had shit to say. The idiot was the only one who bothered, therefore, it made him quite the fool. Especially when he came back after Squalo had knocked him flat.

He was fifteen, the day that he met Xanxus. They never really talked, as the man wasn't much of a talker himself, but a mutual brutality lied within both of their morals that made a sort of a silent alliance. It may have been a spur of the moment thing, to vow his loyalty by his hair, but he really did mean it. With eyes locked, egos being held at bay, he decided on that day that he wouldn't look back. What was his past, his family, was obsolete.

That idiot was here too, Dino. They hadn't talked in a while, not since he decided to talk more to others in a friendly way. They were weaklings. He wasn't, but it would be a mistake to call him a wuss just based on the way he fell into the dirt. They never talked together when they went to middle school. He focussed on his fencing, while in school. He left when he was sixteen to join with Xanxus in the Varia. To be with the most feared among the elite. To live a life of sword sparring solitude was one path he took, but he fought with them. He loved it.

There wasn't many times in his life when he had been scared. None, while he was with the Varia. Once, as a child, when the house was raided and everything burned into a fiery pit of limbo. But only once. He retracts the earlier statement.

The day was bright out. It wasn't often that the Varia as a whole was grouped like this, though their boss was still sleeping in, Lussuria thought it would be good for everybody if they took a stroll down to the park. For weeks, the weather had been bad, raining heavily like monsoon season in Asia, fruitful in its bearings. Today was a first of sun and after being cooped up for far too long, Squalo accepted. They all reeked of shit, plus he liked to procrastinate. He hated paperwork.

Being out there, being able to taste the rain in the air was nice for a loud youngin' like himself. It was clear enough for Squalo to see the sun and he was glad that he came. It would have sucked to stay indoors.

It was only by fate's hand, that his afternoon was ruined by the unsightly zit of a human, walking in the opposite direction of himself. The sandy blond took little notice of him, and that was blatantly offensive. He could hear himself hissing on the tip of his tongue. The others, well they went in their own directions. He was by himself not, and he snapped back his hand, the shaft of his sword locking into place, out from the hidden compartment of his sleeve.

He was surprised to see that he couldn't get a cut on the blonde teenager, because of the girl between them that wasn't looking at him at all, but instead a package that had been tossed on the ground, moments before he had attacked.

What separated the two groups felt nasty. Mouths protruded and lurched, snapping enticingly. Her face was fallen and those blue eyes that had the reflection of the trees in them, they snapped up at his face, very annoyed.

"And what the fuck do you think you are DOING?!" She screeched, a mouth snapping at his side, her eyes infuriated. The woman; no. The girl in front of him was a good inch shorter. She looked like she was going to burst into tears and he fully expected her to, but no. Instead, she locked eyes with him, sizing herself up. The black haired hawk pinched in her cheeks. "I spent all afternoon on that!"

"VOI! THEN YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE THROWN IT ON THE FUCKING GROUND, TRASH!"

Her eyes widened with anger, head reeling back a little, teeth clenching. He didn't want to say how his ears hurt, as she proved how loud she could be. "YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE ATTACKED US, OLD MAN!"

"Old MAN?!"

"H-Hey!" The blond eyesore raised his hands in peace. "Leteth's just calm down, yes?! Master won't be pleased if you come back in bruises!"

"I won't." She said firmly, eyes still locked on Squalo. He tried cracking the shield, or whatever it was, but whatever it was made out of was resilient. "It's him that'll go home a-bruised and battered."

"Thou can't! He's part of the CEDEF-Varia alliance!"

"What's your name, voi"!" Squalo asked, his voice toned down slightly. Her eyebrow raised a little, as if intrigued by his question. She shouldn't have been, he just wanted to know her name.

"Phillipa. Why?" She said articulated, biting her inner cheek flesh. "What's yours, granny? Gladys?"

That really pinched his sides. "IT'S SQUALO, YOU SHE-HAG! I'M GOING TO BEAT YOUR ASS SO HARD THAT YOU WON'T BE CRAWLING BACK TO THAT FUCKING TRASH OF A BOSS!"

And despite all of this, she was the first woman ever to laugh back at such a vicious insult.

What a bitch.

~o0o~

At nineteen, they were working together as a team, despite the constant insults and refusals. Neither of them had a choice to what was going to happen. It was a transferral and one that was needed, since the Varia needed a new officer to join their ranks. They had hundreds to choose from, all liable candidates because it was by his word who was tested and who wasn't, but her name was submitted by the idiot, Iemitsu. He didn't like talking to him, since all that really happened was light hearted stuff, and he couldn't stomach it.

She almost didn't make the cut, but it was by Xanxus's decision that she was let in, even if she made it clear that she didn't want to be here. Frankly, she wanted to train and talk with that weird cat of hers. He didn't like it. Came with her everywhere and sat there, as if it understood. Quite creepy, though he'd never own up to that statement. It was her powers that got her into this anyway. Nobody knew where it came from.

"Born that way." She said, when he asked her about it. She answered as if it wasn't that important, looking off to somewhere else, kicking her feet as she sat in the chair, not able to sit still. It scored her the nickname Fidget.

Missions begun to pile up and soon the bickering turned over and slept. They couldn't fight each other like this anymore, since obviously there wasn't anything they could do to change it. With her powers, the Varia would benefit massively; therefore, she stayed.

It was some hundred missions later, a raid in Shanghai, when he noticed. It went over smoothly, but he realised when they were coming home on the plane, when everyone was sound asleep in their little worlds, that he was still wide awake. And it was her fault. He kept thinking of the fights they could have together, sparing all day, since she had a very good defence; it meant he had to work harder to defeat her. And it wasn't like he could stop it, either. It just happened, regardless of his state of mind.

At twenty, he noticed how well her curves suited her in her ballgown, as they attended the coronation process of the next Chiavarone boss, the idiot himself graduating from clumsy boy to the clumsiest head of the family this world had ever known. He wouldn't have gone, if he hadn't been forced into it. The boss didn't go, no surprises there, so he went there as a representative. Phillipa came, because Reborn had asked her to as his plus one. Squalo was quite surprised by it, them apparently knowing each other until she explained. And then it got unbelievable.

He found himself doubting her.

"So, he's your father?"

"Yes." She replied, nodding. They were sitting outside on the balcony, in the heat of the summer night. All of the doors were open, letting in the air, but out here was best.

"BUT HE'S A CHILD!?"

She grinned. "I'm not blind, but do you really think that Squalo? I don't think he was like that forever. It wouldn't have been possible then."

"You're crazy."

"Noticed that too." Phillipa hopped down from the railing and straightened out her dress, taking her eyes off of him to fix herself. That, in itself, allowed him to gaze while he waited patiently. He knew that there was no point in yelling obscenities at her, his anger wasn't affecting as it should.

Her hands were delicate, as was her posture. You wouldn't think that she's the type of girl who could win hands down in a wrestling match, only losing to a few that Squalo could count on his hands. She wasn't noticeable, didn't gain any notoriety from who she conversed with. Seemed forgettable, almost and that was the genius in her tactics. Phillipa could convince anyone, always able to keep on her toes with what the others around her were thinking. She was a great undercover agent.

"Come on Mister." Phillipa pipped, red licker lips smiling wide, deeply melting in with the dark blue of her dress, mixing with her eyes like a swaying party haze. Gradients of golds, peaches and pinks faded in the background, lights sparkling. "Let's go inside. We can't stay out here, or people might start talking.

"Voi." He said, leaning a little away from here. "Get off my arm, trash."

She clicked, running her tongue on the back of her teeth, eyeing everybody around her with a childish grin. He wondered how long it had been since she'd attended something like this. Maybe this was her first time.

"Loosen up Squalo! It's a party!" Phillipa had moved away in front of him, twirling a little. "Let's dance!"

I don't dance. He thought, frowning. He hated it, actually. While the movement reminded him of the lightness of his feet when if fencing practice, it was completely useless.

It was when he folded his arms and walked away, that he regretted not taking her offer up. It hadn't even been a minute, before the bucking bronco had stumbled up to her, attempting a conversation. He was a little red in the face, as a result from drinking the champagne and she looked at him with a smug yet amused face.

"You wanna dance, Miss….?" He asked, giving out a hand to her, eyes hopeful.

Squalo found himself unable to just stand there at the punch bowl, mingling with himself. His hand was on her shoulder, pulling her close, before he could comprehend his actions.

"Voi, she doesn't want to dance with you."

"Er…." Phillipa smiled with confusion, eyeing him up and down, analysing him. Dino's eyes blinked wider in surprise.

"Wow Squalo, I didn't know you had a girlfriend. A pretty one too."

"He doesn't, I'm not." She quickly corrected, sniffing.

"Then there's no-"

"Hey," Phillipa leaned to the side which Squalo Was standing, looking over Dino's shoulder. She didn't notice, but she was close enough for Squalo to smell her hair. "I think that girl over there's waving at you Bronco, better go over there, quick. Can't disappoint her, aye?"

Dino's soft lips parted, as if to say something else, but Phillipa curtsied a little and excused herself. He looked disappointed, but Squalo didn't have time to pity the blond. She was pulling him back out to the balcony area, where small couples waited outside, doing couple things.

"Dude!" She said in a low tone, like a surfer. "What was that back there?"

That's a good point, He paused, thinking, Why the heck did I do that?

"VOI! THE FUCK I KNOW WHY, I JUST DID!"

"You just did?" She repeated, with an air of suspicion to her voice. She took off her heels, breathing out a heavy sigh of happiness, falling shorter than himself.

He shrugged. It was like she didn't believe but in the end, knowing something out of it. That was one of the things about her, you couldn't be sneaky. You couldn't lie, because she already knew. Like a mind reader.

"Alright then." Phillipa replied, grinning tiredly. "I can't stand being in a room with this many people, so I'm out of here. Catch you later, or tomorrow. Whatever."

He couldn't lie to himself, when he was alone.

Squalo followed her back to the mansion.

~o0o~

And again, at twenty, Squalo knew how he felt about her, though his job came first, as did hers. Sometimes they didn't even see each other for weeks at a time, and when they did, it would be at dinner with the rest of the team, all stuffing their mouths with as much food as possible. She always ate politely, taking her time.

One night, he had come back from the gym, all sweaty and gross so he decided to take a shower. He was on his way back from them to hear crying.

And oddity amongst many.

Phillipa was in her room, drinking milk and eating cookies, while sitting on the windowsill with her legs dangling out the open window. The night was calm, no wind or rain. Strange, at this time of year, but it was stranger to see this coming from her. She loudly sniffed her nose, when she realized he was watching and tucked her legs in,

"W-What are you doing up?" She stuttered, turning to face him. She was in a tank top and short pyjama pants that revealed a lot of skin on her legs and chest area. He sighed and looked to the side of the room, feeling his face heat up and stomach tighten.

"Shower." He stated. "Voi, why the fuck are you crying?"

"I'm not!" She said, wiping her face.

What a fat load of bullshit.

He didn't want to watch her like this, so he sat beside her on the windowsill and talked, eating cookies together. He didn't realise how hungry he was, or maybe just ignoring the fact that he needed to keep his mouth busy from doing anything else.

"People are just cruel." Phillipa whispered, her voice breaking with emotion.

"Voi, what did you expect, daisies and roses?"

"Fuck no! But…." She sniffed and looked down. The cat jumped off the bed and wandered into the hallway, probably looking for something to occupy itself with.

"What happened?" He asked, in all seriousness.

"I foolishly decided to chase after the truth."

He didn't reply, but instead ate another biscuit, biting down on it hard. He wondered what this truth was.

"And it sucked, I'm guessing?'

She laughed like it was horrible to. "Oh yeah. Some idiot decided to kill himself after I met him. I just wanted to talk."

"...A guy?" He asked wearing, treading.

Phillipa smiled softly, but it was a bitter one. Her eyes were watering, fingers fumbling with a wet tissue. "Yeah, but not in the way that you're thinking. Way way too old for me."

He didn't press on further and she didn't give a clear answer as to who the man was, or what information she got. All she said at the end, when the cookies were all gone, was that she was done with "this", whatever "this" was. She looked tired, and he told her that, stating that she should go to bed.

Her eyes lingered longer than they should have, blinking thoughtfully before being slowly whisked away with a whimsical courtesy of a smile, blue eyes shutting off from the world.

He would have stayed there, if she asked.

But that was a dream.

She was twenty, the first time they encountered the young Vongola, who shrieked and cried out like a japanese schoolgirl, overexerting his voice. Squalo's eye twitched every time he screamed, not particularly liking how he acted. It certainly wasn't the way a boss should act, only proving further in his eyes that Xanxus should be the Vongola boss, and not this wimp of a kid.

But that changed, when he watched them fighting. He couldn't move from his wheelchair, but Phillipa stood by him with Reborn on her shoulder, watching the fight together with jaded eyes. He felt her wish to fight and promised silently that they would, when he got back on his feet and out of this fucking chair.

And when he did, he punched Dino right in the face when he tried to hit on her again. This was when they were just about to leave Japan, the Vongola kid still in awe of the Phillipa-Reborn relationship, though he didn't know what to make of it. This caused fighting between the two men and Phillipa herself, to which then Reborn entered and everything went to hell in a handbasket. That didn't happen in front of Reborn ever again.

Both Phillipa and Dino laughed the incident off, but Squalo felt serious on that moment and yet, it shouldn't have surprised him as it did when she asked if he was free that afternoon.

"Voi! Why the hell do you need to know?!"

"Woah!" She yelled with a whole dollop of sarcasm. Hands raised peacefully in the air. "Hold your hormones there, she-hulk! It's an innocent question, honest!"

"I don't believe you." He said. "Voi, do you think I'm fucking STUPID?!"

Her eyes widened, snorting a smile. "Woah, woah! Really!"

That was disappointing, to hear it was only just a question.

"Nothing." Squalo replied.

"Good! Then you can come with me!"

"VOI!"

"What?" Phillipa asked.

"..." He sighed, focussing on the wall past her face. He held out a hand and blushed, admittingly liking how he felt when he talked with her, touched her hand, smiled with her. Happy was what he was, and it was good. So, he took the chance.

"Let's go." He grunted.

~o0o~

It was a date, even if she avoided anything to do with couple things. He purposely left his sword back at the mansion, but really he did want to go cut some things into shreds. Like, maybe those guys that kept looking at her as she sat at the cafe table, drinking a red drink and happily talking about whatever was on her mind. He actually felt less manly sitting here. He thought he'd be doing something fun, but not this.

She noticed. Phillipa always did.

"Why are you still here? You know you don't have to stay, out of politeness. You can go if you're bored..." She asked, sipping. "I just needed to get out of there, you know? Can't stand being around them for too long..."

"Voi….Don't you have anything else to do?"

Phillipa pouted. "Uh, nope."

"Let's get out of here." He growled, feeling uncomfortable.

"Well, alright then. Let's take a walk! You like that, right?"

He liked the outdoors better than indoors, so rather cleverly they walked through the botanical gardens, as the day gave into the sweltering summer heat. A lot of people were eating icecreams, in togs on the beach and Phillipa was walking around, eating an ice cream that dribbled down her hands. She licked them and giggled when Squalo met her eyes.

They were standing under the shade of an old, grandeur tree that curved over with long, dangling branches that hung in mid air, not quite able to touch their heads yet. Phillipa had gone quiet after she finished eating and when he stared at her, she looked at him directly. He got caught in the stare, slightly blushing, hands in pockets and Phillipa was obviously going with what she thought was best at the moment.

"I like you." Phillipa blurted, turning beet red all over her cheeks and nose. Her eyes closed quickly, and she turned her head away from him, out of pure embarrassment. "I m-mean, the same way that you like me...Uh..."

This confession sent his nerves out of control. He tried to cover his face with a hand, looking slightly up as he thought to himself, sighing as his stomach danced about. Squalo's mouth was dry and he made her turn to face him by grabbing her hand and spinning her like a ballerina.

Phillipa squeaked as his other hand rested on her back, pulling them closer together, He thought that she looked cute when she was flustered and decided to cross the line even more. He kissed her forcefully, letting go of her wrist so that he could hold her chin up. Her cheeks were terribly warm and she tasted like summer, kissing him back just as forcefully when she regained her composure. The nerves took of, and the two stood there under the shade, exchanging covered smiles and hushed words.

"The park's not a good place for a date." He said, once they broke off their kisses to breathe properly. Her face was flushed, hand waving at it, trying to cool herself off. Be it heat of the sun or the beginning of something new, being outside today was probably a mistake. It was cooler inside. They had air conditioning and that was a joy in its own right. "Next time, lets go somewhere else."

"What about now?" Phillipa asked, her arms resting on his broad shoulders. "I'm not doing anything tonight, either…."

In a rare moment, he gave her a soft smile and kissed her cheek lightly, putting his arm around her shoulders as they begun to walk was a good day in Squalo's mind, because he never felt that kind of love - though he despises using the word, it's the only thing suitable - from anyone and from anyone, but her. And the fact that she was happy to stand beside him, to always chose his side in a fight was brilliant.

He just had to find out how to deal with her possessive tabby, and then life would be perfect.

~o0o~

I've spent a year on this story and even now I can't remember how it came about. All I know is that it kept me up for nights on end, sometimes being my first priority on the weekends and holidays. I've really loved writing this. I liked sitting here and giving you a story, knowing what's to come and cringing at how much you loved Al. I feel like this is a graduating child or something, jeez. :D

Soooo, I want to say something quickly about the endings. Honestly, I originally had two endings. One where she lives, and where she dies. That was right from the start but like all things, they change over time and I couldn't see myself with just one ending, because…..*sighs* Because I just couldn't. I love playing with different scenarios. Forgive me though. I promise I'll try and be just as sneaky and cruel in my other stories.

It was hard to restrain myself from telling things, when your comments came in. This is my thank you gift to all of you who have stayed from the very beginning, from before this even begun. And to those who are reading now, I thank you too.

Please write something nice if you've gotten this far, to those who have just started to read, or have been with me since the start. I've loved talking to you guys and I feel very sad for leaving you, but I'm glad I actually ended something (for once), and didn't give up.

Replies, my lovelies:

laffup: *Breaks out into Macklemore*

LeoInuyuka: I'm sorry. *bows*

Akayuki Sawada: Nope, I think I killed everyone.

Zuta-Chan: Well, I hope you still ain't after this chapter, otherwise I really will be sad.

Mashi-a-Mellow: 's okay. I had to go downstairs to the common-room for coffee a lot of the time to keep me up for the late night sessions, so I know how everyone feels when they're too lazy to login. Mind you, mine's always logged in.

sin kx: *Captures love in a net and stores in a bottle for keepsakes*

Viper's girl: Three different scenarios portraying possible endings! It's all very iffy, so don't fret over it! (Al's love for you is undying! So is mine!)

My Name is Alice: (Response to all three.) Yes to everything! Just….YES!

Animefreak1123: Yes, I seemed to be getting that a lot so I labeled the chapters so that people know know.

All the best.

*Mwah Mwah*

Verdigurl out.