AN: You're not going to like me after this chapter - but honestly, guys, it just wouldn't be realistic if everyone survived.

PetisaSerasVos: haha, that is just amazing!

BlueD: um... no, my full name is not Madison xD. I don't have a full name. It's just Maddy.

Severussnapefan123: you're the only one remembering that :P yes, I did say that.

The Wizard Of Wicked: well... um... *shuffles uncomfortably* I might be...

Chapter 16. The aftermath

The first thing Elphaba became aware of was a sharp pain in her head that made her gasp. Her body felt heavy and numb and everything hurt; and for a moment, she wondered what in Oz had happened to her.

Then she remembered the explosions, and she suddenly felt sick to her stomach.

Her eyes slowly fluttered open and she tried not to wince at the little light that filled the room – it hurt her eyes. She was in a dark room, lying on a bed. When she blinked a few times, she could distinguish Gazilon sitting in the armchair next to the bed.

"Gaz?" she croaked, and he immediately leapt to his feet.

"Elphaba!" When he came closer, stepping into the small beam of moonlight that shone into the room, she could see that he had been crying.

He took her hand, gently squeezing it. "Oz, El… I'm so glad you're awake," he said hoarsely. "It's been hours, and you didn't wake up… the nurses weren't even sure if you ever would."

She brought her hand up to her painful head, only to feel a bandage there. As she slowly became aware of her surroundings and of her own body again, she realised her right arm was wrapped up in a tight bandage, as was her lower left leg. They both hurt, too, but that wasn't the most important thing right now.

"Where are the others?" she whispered, struggling to sit up, but Gazilon gently pushed her down again.

Her anguished eyes met his. "Are they alright?"

He hesitated.

He hesitated.

A sense of dread washed over her.

"Galinda and Cyara are fine," he said quietly. "They were going to have tea on campus, but then Galinda remembered a nice café in town and they went there instead – thank Oz. They were far away when the attack came and they didn't even know about it until they got back here. They don't have a scratch."

Elphaba closed her eyes, relieved; but at the same time, there was something in Gazilon's voice that told her that not everyone had been so lucky.

"They're volunteering in helping the other victims of the attack," Gazilon continued. "It's complete chaos out there. There were three explosions, bringing down a huge part of the university. The victims have been brought into classrooms and dormitories and nurses and doctors are everywhere, but there's just not enough of them to treat everyone. You've been checked over by a nurse briefly, someone bandaged up your wounds, and then they told me to take you back here to my dorm room because there was no room for you at the hospital. The hospital is completely full, anyway – all emergency cases that needed surgery or are hurt extremely badly."

Elphaba listened in complete silence, horror filling her when the reality of what had happened hit her.

"You broke your arm," Gazilon continued, "and you've ripped some ligaments in your ankle, too. They had to stitch up the wound on your temple and they put a bandage around it – you've got a mild concussion. You should be fine, though." He squeezed her hand. "Thank Oz."

"Gaz…" she whispered. "What about Boq and Fiyero?"

Gazilon looked down, avoiding her gaze and not saying anything.

Elphaba tried her hardest not to panic. "Gazilon?"

He closed his eyes for a moment.

"The Psychology building was where the first explosion took place," he whispered. "The first explosion was also the worst one. The entire building caved in immediately, before any of the people inside could even attempt to escape." He lowered his gaze. "No-one who was in that building survived."

Elphaba's eyes were wide. "Are you… are you saying that Boq…"

Gazilon nodded, tears in his light brown eyes. "I'm sorry, Elphaba."

She clamped her free hand over her mouth, horrified. Tears filled her eyes.

She wasn't sure whether or not she wanted to know the answer to the next question, but she had to ask. "What… what about Fiyero?" she choked out.

Gazilon reached out again to squeeze her good arm sympathetically. "He's alive," he assured her.

Elphaba's tears spilled over and she let out a sob, closing her eyes for a moment as relief washed over her. "Where is he?" she whispered.

Gazilon sighed. "In his dorm room. Glin and Cyara are taking care of him." He looked at Elphaba and his eyes met hers.

"El," he said softly. "He… he and I found you, and he tried to carry you outside, to safety. We were taking you outside when there was a girl, trapped under some rubble, screaming for help…" He swallowed. "Honestly? I wanted to leave her there in order to make it safely out myself, along with you and Fiyero; but Fiyero insisted on helping the girl. He handed you over to me and told me to make sure you were safe, and then he helped that girl. She lives, she got out safely, but Fiyero… the ceiling collapsed on top of him, El."

Elphaba's face was pale and she was shaking her head frantically. "No."

"They… they don't think he's going to make it," Gazilon whispered sadly. "I'm sorry, Elphaba. I really am."

The world started spinning and her face suddenly went ashen, almost grey. Gazilon quickly grabbed a vase from the bedside table and held Elphaba's hair back as she retched into it, the sounds of her throwing up alternated with sobs escaping her lips.

When she was finished, Gazilon gently dabbed her face with a wet, cold cloth and handed her a glass of water. Her teeth chattered against the glass and she nearly choked on the water a few times; but by the time she lowered the glass and he took it back from her, she did look a bit calmer.

"I want to see him."

He sighed. "El…"

"No, Gazilon." Her dark brown eyes were piercing as they bored into his. "I'm going to see him with or without your help, so you might as well come with me to make sure I don't topple over."

"You're not supposed to –"

"I don't care! Oz dammit, Gazilon, just take me to him!" she shouted, suddenly frustrated. "It's my fault he's hurt in the first place! It's my fault that Boq is dead, and… and all those people…" Another sob escaped her throat. "It's my fault…"

"It's not." He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her gently. "El, it's not your fault. Not at all."

"How can you say that?" She angrily pulled away from him, trying to blink back her tears, but failing. "Gazilon, if I hadn't secretly been with Fiyero all this time, none of this would have happened! Boq would be alive, and Fiyero would be safe…"

"Fiyero would be unhappy," Gazilon corrected her.

"But safe," she added.

He shook his head. "It's not your fault," he said. "It wasn't fair of anyone to ask this of us in the first place… and besides – if Nessa hadn't written to your father…"

Elphaba shook her head frantically. "It's not her fault," she said in a choked voice. "She just did what she thought what's best. It's my fault. Mine, and mine alone." She struggled to sit up. "Now help me get up."

He sighed, but obeyed, helping her to a sitting position on the edge of the bed. He went to fetch his own robe and draped it around her shoulders to keep her warm before supporting her as she rose to her feet.

"Don't put pressure on your left ankle," he warned her, and she nodded. She started hopping, carefully, slowly. Her head felt like it might burst, but that wasn't the most important thing right now. The most important thing was that she would get to Fiyero.

Painfully slowly, she and Gazilon made their way through the hallway and towards Fiyero's dorm room. People hurried through the hallways every now and then, carrying food, water or medical supplies. The dormitories had been spared, but most of the university buildings had at least partially collapsed because of the explosions.

Gazilon knocked on the door and Galinda's voice called, "Come in!" When he pushed open the door and gently helped Elphaba inside, Galinda looked up from where she was stirring something in a bowl. Her eyes widened.

"Oh, Elphie!" she cried, putting the bowl down hurriedly and all but running towards her friend, gingerly hugging her. "Thank Oz you're alright!"

"Elphaba?" Cyara poked her head out from the bathroom and smiled sadly when she saw the green girl. "Hey. Good to see that you're okay."

Elphaba hugged her roommate back tightly, burying her face in Galinda's shoulder for a moment.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry about Boq, and Fiyero, and… everything. Everyone."

Galinda hugged her a bit tighter. "Me, too, Elphie," she said softly. "But we'll make it through. Don't worry. We'll be fine."

She let go of Elphaba and the green girl slowly made her way over to the bed, with Gazilon supporting her. Once she had reached it, he turned around to usher Galinda and Cyara into the adjoining sitting room to give Elphaba some time alone with Fiyero.

She gingerly reached out to touch his forehead. There were stitches just above his left eyebrow, and there was a bandage around his head as well. His eyes were closed and he looked paler than she had ever seen him. He looked like he was already gone.

A sob escaped her lips. "Fiyero…"

She crawled onto the bed with him, wrapping her good arm around him and burying her face in his neck.

"I'm sorry…" she whispered, tears leaking from her eyes. "I'm so sorry, Yero, it's my fault… it's all my fault. I'm sorry… please don't die. I promise I'll do anything – I'll listen to my father next time, I'll marry Gazilon, I'll leave you alone for the rest of your life, you won't have to see me ever again, I promise… just don't die. Yero… please, please don't die…"

Violent, but silent sobs racked her body, and she was trembling all over. "I'm so sorry…" She didn't seem to be capable of saying anything else. "Fiyero, please… please… I love you…" She choked on a sob. "Just come back," she begged him quietly. "Please. If not for me, then for your mother, and for Cyara… they already lost their husband and father, they can't lose you, too… not because of me. Please, Fiyero…"

"Elphie?"

Galinda stood in the doorway with Cyara right next to her. Both of them were slightly shocked to see Elphaba like this, but they tried not to let it show.

Elphaba, however, didn't even acknowledge their presence. She just burrowed into Fiyero's side, still crying and begging him not to die, to come back, to forgive her.

"Elphaba…" Cyara made her way into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed, placing her hand on Elphaba's shoulder.

The green girl looked up, her face stained with tears; and when she saw the tears standing in Cyara's eyes, she started sobbing even harder.

"I'm so sorry, Cyara!" she cried, burying her face in a pillow. "It's all my fault!"

"Of course it's not your fault." Cyara gently stroked the older girl's hair. Galinda, meanwhile, made her way over to the other side of the bed and sat down on the edge, reaching out to take Elphaba's hand in her own.

"It's the Glikkuns' fault," Cyara continued softly. "Not yours, Elphaba."

"And if you really want to blame someone for the Glikkuns finding out about you and Fiyero, blame Nessa," Galinda said fiercely. "She's the one who told your father!"

Elphaba shook her head, which was still buried in the pillow. "There wouldn't have been anything to tell if I hadn't done it!" she shouted, wrapping her good arm around herself and curling up in the foetal position, her head on Fiyero's chest. She could hear his heartbeat, which calmed her down just the tiniest bit. He wasn't dead yet. There was still hope for him.

But all those other students…

She was a murderer. Her father had been right all this time – she was a curse, an aberration, she only brought pain and death to the people around her.

Cyara was still stroking her hair. "He'll be okay," she said in a soothing tone of voice. "Elphaba, Yero will be okay. I've known him all my life and he's the most stubborn person I've ever met. He'll pull through. He would never leave us like this."

"I've been so weak," Elphaba whispered. "If I had only been able to stay strong, to stand my ground… Fiyero would have never known. None of you would have known about what was going on. It would have broken his heart, yes, and mine, too, but… but at least he'd be safe. At least he'd be alive. He and all those other students…"

"Yes, and then what?" Galinda asked sharply. "Then the Glikkuns would have attacked a university in Gillikin instead. Or in the Emerald City. Maybe they would have killed my parents, or my friends back home. Maybe they would have killed Nessa and Boq's friends in Munchkin City. They're terrorists, Elphie. No matter what you would have done, it would have ended in pain, death and bloodshed, anyway. And I want you to stop blaming yourself for this," she said, a fiery look in her blue eyes as she grabbed Elphaba's chin and forced the raven-haired girl to look up at her. "None of this is your fault. Just like it's not your fault that your mother died, or that Nessa was crippled. Elphie, the only reason why you believe all those things is because your father put them in your head; but they're not true. None of them are true. You are an amazing person, Elphaba Thropp; and if, Oz forbid, Fiyero should die… then at least he will have known the truth. At least he knows you love him, and you gave him the chance to be with you. He loves you, too, Elphie. So much. Knowing that you were safe was the most important thing for him."

Elphaba remained quiet for a long while. The girls just sat there for a few minutes; Elphaba still curled up on the bed, with Galinda holding her hand tightly and Cyara gently stroking her long, black hair.

"You need to sleep," Cyara said softly after a while. "That nurse said you need a lot of rest."

"I'll ask Gazilon to take you back to his room," Galinda offered, but Elphaba immediately shot up.

"No!"

"Elphie –"

"I'm staying here," the green girl declared, curling up on the bed once more.

Galinda sighed. "Elphie, you can't –"

"Let her," Cyara said, interrupting the blonde.

Galinda closed her mouth, sighed again, and nodded. "Alright. Fine." She grabbed a blanket and tucked Elphaba in, hugging her gently for a moment. "You'll be fine, Elphie. And so will Fiyero."

When the girls came back into the sitting room where Gazilon still was, he looked up at them. "And?"

"She thinks it's her fault," Cyara said quietly, sitting down in a chair. "She blames herself, she feels horrible… it's awful to watch." She sighed, running her fingers through her long, light blonde hair. "I wish he would just get better," she whispered, tears springing to her own green eyes now. "I lost my father, and now…"

"He'll live," Galinda tried to comfort her. "Fiyero will be fine, Cyara."

The Vinkun princess heaved a shaky sigh. "I hope so."

"Elphie is staying here," Galinda told Gazilon. "Do you want to stay as well?"

Gazilon nodded. "I really don't want to be alone tonight."

Galinda gave him a sympathetic smile. "We can sleep on the couch, or on the floor," she said, looking around her. "We just shouldn't leave Elphie or Fiyero alone right now."

Gazilon rose to his feet. "I'll go find some blankets," he offered.

He moved into the bedroom and his heart broke when he saw Elphaba and Fiyero this way. He was still unconscious and she was as close to him as she could possibly be, her cheek pressed against his chest, dried tears still on her face. She was asleep by now, for which he was grateful – she needed her rest and he knew how hard it must be for her to just relax and go to sleep right now.

He quietly took some blankets from the closet and tiptoed back to the sitting room, where he would set up camp with Galinda and Cyara.