Woop woop new chapter, it might be the last in a while though so try to bear with me here. As always thank you to my lovely reviewers
The tent wasn't much protection from the early sun, this became evident as it crept into Quinn's dreams and pulled her into reality. She rubbed her eyes and tried not to jump when she heard Santana's hoarse voice. "Sorry for last night, Q. It was just a pretty intense day."
"Don't worry about it San, personally I'm surprised I made it through at all. How are things with you and Britt?"
Santana sighed and buried her face into her pillow. "I don't know if I'm honest. I always thought if I got her back then everything would be good again. That if there was just her then nothing else would matter. But now she's here and I still feel lost."
"Maybe you just need space? Rachel and I are splitting up for the day to get our heads around everything, you and Britt might want to do the same."
Santana sat up and tried not to let herself hope. "So we could spend the day together then? I mean it would be like the old days when we'd go for walks with Fran."
Quinn scoffed. "Yeah but every time we did that, one of us would end up caked in mud and the other soaking after falling into the river. But maybe after lunch we can, I just need to have a word with Kurt first."
"You know that's a bad idea right? He isn't exactly thrilled about you and Berry. It got to the point yesterday when I had to tell him to cool off with the laser eyes." Santana shook her head with bewilderment; she should have known not to get her hopes up for a drama free day with Quinn.
"We just don't want to start this with a load of resistance already there, I mean once we get out into the real world it will be hell. Everyone is going to want a piece of us, especially since Rach hasn't even come out to the press yet and we just want this time to find our feet. So having both you and Kurt on board would mean the world to us."
Santana shook her head. "You know I'm not going to meddle anymore, so long as you're sure that you're in it for the right reasons. I care about Berry too you know, I want you both to be happy, it's just seeing what you went through it made me so mad at whoever did it to you. I mean sure, Berry was a bitch, but I still want her to be happy and if that happens to be with you then so be it."
Quinn smiled at her friend's lack of resistance. "Does that mean you'd be willing to talk to her while I'm with Kurt? You've heard my side of the story but I think maybe you should hear hers."
Santana smiled and shook her head. "Sure, whatever."
Quinn grinned in triumph and jumped out the tent to see Sam waiting for her, looking a bit sheepish. "Sam? Are you ok?" She asked, ignoring Santana's loud protests from inside the tent about him being there. "I just wanted to talk to you about something. It's nothing really I just wanted to clear some things up." Sam mumbled.
Quinn nodded and followed him a bit further away from the tent. "You can tell me whatever it is, Sam. I'm in no position to judge."
Sam smiled and sighed in relief. "It's just me and Puck were talking,"
"What's he said now?" Quinn cut in with a smirk before seeing Sam's annoyed expression and nodding. "Sorry, go on."
Sam shook his head before continuing. "It's just that us and Finn were the only guys to ever seriously date you and well, we didn't treat you all that great. I mean Puck feels terrible about how he took your virginity and I was too obsessed with being popular to actually realise what you were going through and Finn was a total jerk toward you, like at least me and Puck are sorry about it. I just wanted you to know that you didn't deserve any of it, and I'm really sorry for what happened back then."
"Sam, don't worry about it." She put a hand on his arm. "High school relationships are full of crap and usually the worst that anyone is going to experience, I mean there's a reason they never work out. Plus I cheated on you, I cheated on Finn as well I was an awful girlfriend and I know that you were nothing but a gentleman whilst we were going out as well as after so please don't feel bad."
"I know what Finn did." Sam looked straight into her eyes, his blue orbs intent on letting her know what he was referring to. "He bragged to me about it."
"He didn't actually do anything wrong you know, my father would have figured out who Beth's dad was anyway. I deserved what I got." Quinn looked down and began to turn away before Sam grabbed her arm.
"He knew what your Dad would have done to you, he knew he was endangering Beth's life by contacting him. He certainly shouldn't have been gloating about it when he started dating you again." Sam insisted. "I'm sorry I let him, and I'm sorry I let everyone worship him like a hero when he died; I don't blame you for not being at the memorial."
Quinn put a gentle hand on his bicep with a small smile. " Finn was troubled, he had issues and we all chose to ignore them. He wasn't all bad though, he could be sweet and kind and I knew he loved Rachel. It was still tragic that he died so young and it wouldn't have done anyone any favours if I had come along and reminded everyone that he wasn't the hero that people needed him to be in order to grieve. Rach didn't want me there either."
Sam nodded with that same sweet smile that Quinn had fallen for all those years ago. "I just needed you to know that I regret what happened and I hope we can be friends because I happened to hear that you're a secret star wars fan."
"Who told you?" Quinn asked with wide eyes, only Santana and Brittany knew about her lifelong appreciation for sci-fi films. Star Trek? Doctor Who? Star Wars? Battlestar? She loved them all.
"Britt let it slip when we were dating. Don't worry though, I won't tell a soul." The blond man smiled and patted her shoulder.
"Have you guys stopped being sappy so I can get out without interrupting some ridiculously heartfelt conversation where we are feel sorry for Quinn despite not giving a crap for the ten years we've known her." Santana's head poked out of the tent with an unamused expression.
Sam blushed and began to stutter until Quinn cut in. "Don't worry Sam, she's just winding you up. I mean she doesn't have a leg to stand on really, not with the constant back-stabbing since we were like 5."
Santana rolled her eyes and began to get out of the tent. "Shut up Fabray, you too Trouty. I needs to get ma coffee on." She strolled toward the campfire, swaying her hips so she could laugh at the two blondes staring at her ass. "Eyes up here Barbie." She called out behind her. "Same goes to you Quinn."
Quinn laughed and shook her head. "I best get away if I'm going to catch Kurt before he's latched on to Mercedes. By the way you should speak to her, I mean you two were great together back then maybe you could see if that's still there."
Sam nodded. "You're right, plus I think I owe her an apology as well. I was kind of a brat when we broke up."
By the time Quinn had found Kurt he was waiting against a tree by the river. Aparently Rachel had told him about their plan and he wasn't too impressed.
"Hey Kurt."
"Quinn." Was the sharp reply as his icy blue eyes locked onto her.
"How have you been?" Quinn really didn't was to go straight into an argument so she made an attempt at small talk.
"Come on Quinn we both know you couldn't care less about what I've been doing. I haven't even seen you since glee ended. Even then I could barely glance at you without Biff Whats-His-Face thinking I was giving him the eye." Kurt glared at her as if it was her fault her ex was a douche. It's not as if Blaine or Adam where saints.
"Then what do you want then? Because I'm guessing your problem is with me or it would be Rachel standing here." Quinn was sick of this. She was sick of defending herself to people who just couldn't mind their own business. She was sick of having to fight for a relationship that had barely even started.
"Well, well, well it seems that arrogance isn't the only thing taught at Yale. You missed your calling as a detective, really." Kurt quipped snidely.
"I didn't realise hypocrisy was a major at NYADA either." Quinn retorted, smirking at Kurt's unimpressed expression.
"I don't like you Quinn. I've never liked you. You're mean, your cruel and you have no respect for anyone the years that you tormented us, even when we were teammates and now you stand there all high and mighty claiming to have changed. You don't deserve Rachel."
"If we're going by that standard then neither do you. All the times I "tortured" you guys it was me and Santana staking our claim so that the jocks and the hockey guys wouldn't be so hard on you and when they were we prompted the guys to help you. You worshiped Finn for not hurting you but he was causing more damage than good; Santana, Puck and me all had to suck it up and get on with it to god damn protect you! Then we sat there while Schue lectured us about not playing as a team while Finn lapped it up even though he was as good as responsible for what all the football players did."
Kurt shook his head angrily. "Don't you dare talk about him like that. Not when you're pretty much spitting on his grave by stealing Rachel. Do have any idea how this will effect Carole and my dad? To see their son's sweetheart not only move on but move on with his other sweetheart? It would break them."
"In which case they need to grow up and realise that they can't stop other people being happy because they're still grieving. They're good people and I know they wouldn't think twice about us doing what would make us happy even if Finn wouldn't have been a fan. You however are an entirely different story. Just tell me the truth Kurt."
Kurt huffed and sat against a tree. "You do realise what would be happening right now if he was alive right? He would sweep her off her feet and she would fall for him again. Him a successful show choir coach and her a Broadway sensation, they would be magnificent. Whatever you do, you won't be him so you'll never be what she wants. Plus I don't like you anyway, at least when you were a cheerio I didn't have to suffer your hideous penchant for layers."
Quinn laughed and sat by him. "There we go the real reason is my fashion sense. I knew we'd get down to it."
"I just don't want her to go back to the animal sweatshirts once she sees you get away with those fugly scarves." Kurt smirked.
Quinn gasped over-exaggeratedly. "I can't believe you just said that."
"Honestly though, if Finn were alive you wouldn't have a chance." Kurt sobered in a flash.
"Perhaps but he isn't. They were kids when they were together, not everyone marries their first love Kurt. Finn struggled to stay faithful when he was with her every day, do you honestly think he'd wait all that time for her?" Though she had never told anyone, Finn had made moves on her several occasions in senior year especially when they had run for Prom king and queen.
"He still would've come back to her. He always came back to her and she would always take him." Kurt argued.
"Do you do this with everyone she tries to date? Are you ever going to let her be happy?"
"There is a difference between her dating a nice guy who never even met Finn to her being with his ex-girlfriend who made her life hell!" He yelled making Quinn flinch. He turned back and looked at her curiously when he saw he terrified look in her eyes. "Sorry I didn't mean to sound so aggressive there."
Quinn nodded with wide eyes. "No don't be. I'm just a bit on edge at the moment."
"I guess I'm just not used to people finding me scary, usually people find it funny when I yell. That doesn't make it ok though." Kurt only knew a limited amount about Quinn's father, just that he was bad enough that Mercedes refused to let her move back home after her pregnancy if he was there. And Mercedes Jones wasn't scared of much.
"Seriously, forget about it. I'm sick of people thinking I'm about to break, you are a 100 percent right about me hurting Rachel in the past and I deserve to be yelled at for that. Actually I deserve a lot worse." Quinn admitted, subconsciously stroking her thumb across her wrist and pressing in the nail to her soft skin.
Kurt watched the movement in alarm and reached out to hold her hand. "You did break Quinn, I know no one ever talks about it but you did several times and all because we didn't pay enough attention to see what was going on. You don't deserve what you do to yourself" His eyes where softer now and his words felt less condemning and more like a promise. "But that doesn't mean you deserve her either. I know you've had a tough life, much worse than any of us had imagined, but you have made badchoices that have hurt people and as soon as I see you take responsibility and try to fix that then you'll start to be someone who deserves a love like hers." He spared her a soft smile as he patted her hand and stood up.
Quinn looked up at him with a fixed jaw and a fiery determination she'd barely known since she buried Lucy with a nose job and a bottle of peroxide when she was fourteen. "I can do that. I will make it right."
Kurt smiled warmly at her. "There's the fabulous Quinn Fabray we all know and are slightly terrified of!" He quipped and helped her up. "Do you reckon that's sufficient enough of a heart to heart to appease Miss Berry?"
"Sure, I mean she'll probably set us up for a rematch until we actually resolve this but I reckon it will be ok for now. How do you reckon her and Santana are getting on?"
"Well considering the mess they made over the whole Funny Girl understudy saga way back, I'm surprised they haven't caused enough of a stir to damn well set this volcano off! Like seriously I love them both but god help anyone who crosses them." He smirked.
"You're a bitch, you know that right?" Santana mumbled as she sat on a boulder by the lake. She and Rachel had just had a screaming match for a solid 20 minutes and know they were both out of breath and emotionally exhausted, although they had succeeded in avoiding the face when fighting so as not to upset Quinn.
Rachel laughed but winced when she moved her ribs. "Did you hit me with a rock or something? Because it feels like I've been ran over."
Santana frowned and shuffled closer. "Nah I always avoid using weapons, besides Q would kill me. Let me take a look, something might be broken." She knelt in front of the woman as she pulled up her top. "Is it the ribs?" She asked, running her fingertips over the red skin that covered the bones that was already beginning to turn purple.
Rachel hissed at the gentle touch. "I think It might have been when you pushed me earlier, I hit the ground pretty hard." Her voice strained with trying not to groan in pain when the Latina pressed on her abused bones.
"Yeah sorry about that, I don't think they're broken though just bruised. Even then I'd be careful; it might be worth heading into town for some ice packs." Santana mumbled distractedly, already berating herself for being kind to the person she's considered heartless for years.
"Thanks Dr Lopez." Rachel joked but when Santana shot her a glare she sobered. She pulled her top down and leant back so she could soak up the sun. "You know we just did all that and I still don't know the real reason you can't see me happy with Quinn."
"Because you don't know her, you can't possibly or you would have took her with open arms way back when. She was drowning and you sent her right back out to sea. I just don't get how you could do that and then claim her once she's finally back on her feet." There was a hoarseness to her tone that made Rachel feel infinitely guilty. "She deserves someone who will put her first, without reward or obligation; she deserves someone who will keep her steady when she's about to fall and pick her up if she does anyway."
Rachel sat up and threw her a pointed look. "What like you?" She snapped, hating the way she felt so inadequate at her words. Although when she saw the guilt flash across her face she knew she'd hit a nerve. "That's what it is isn't it? You don't want me to have her so you can keep her to yourself. So what's Brittany? A fling? Something to keep you warm before you make your move on Quinn?" Rachel fumed.
"Don't you dare! You have no idea what I feel for Britt or Quinn for that matter. I love both of them for than you'll ever be capable of loving someone, so what if I'm confused about what I feel at least I can feel something for someone outside myself!" She snapped, standing up despite her bones cracking in protest.
"So you admit it? You're getting into a relationship with Britt, despite having feelings for Quinn. Do you have any idea how messed up that is? B would move the earth for you and you repay her by letting her think you'd do the same? You're pathetic!" Rachel sneered whilst facing up to her old rival. "And you have the nerve to tell me that I'm selfish!"
"Hey! Me and Britt are soulmates ok? I love her and I wouldn't do anything to hurt her but she hasn't been in my life for years. It's not my fault that I started having feelings for other people as well especially since me and Quinn have been sleeping together since I moved to LA." She snarled.
Rachel felt her blood run cold. It was irrational, she knew this, she knew Quinn would have been with other people since High School. She had met Biff and she was happy for her and Puck but there was something utterly chilling about the idea of Santana being with Quinn.
Santana grinned, knowing she'd hit a nerve. "What? Did you think that we'd just leave it after the wedding? That we'd spend years getting drunk together and cuddling and being there for each other with nothing ever happening? I'm sure it feels great to know that I got further with her then you. Although I'll bet you'll get there soon, you know how insatiable Quinn is, she's begging for it right?" Santana stopped to notice the hurt on the shorter woman's face. "Oh? She's not? I'm surprised I've always had to fight her off." She smirked.
"Fuck you Santana Lopez." Rachel yelled though her voice broke mid-sentence.
"Quinn Sure did!" Was the response that was shouted after her.
Rachel ran until she found Quinn chatting easily with Kurt and Mercedes.
"Hey Ra-" Quinn was cut off with a bruising kiss that felt too violent to be loving.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Rachel's voice was soft with the effort of not crying. "We even freaking talked about our exes and you still didn't mention her."
Quinn frowned and glanced at the two diva's next to her to see if they had any idea what was going on. "Who?"
"Don't fucking play dumb with me Quinn! You've been fucking Santana for years and you never thought to tell me?" She yelled, drawing the attention of the people around them.
Quinn grabbed her arm. "Can we please not have this conversation quite so publicly? I don't even have to explain my sex life to you, let alone everyone else!" She hissed while trying to pull her away.
Rachel shrugged her off with ease as she wasn't gripping that tightly, no doubt so that she didn't hurt her, the thought sent a wave of guilt through her though it was soon replaced by anger. "So you're not even going to deny it? Do you love her?"
Quinn stood stock still with shock, she hadn't expected that question although her silence was enough of an answer to Rachel.
"I knew it. You are such a hypocrite, coming here acting like a victim when you're just playing me. What was this, revenge? I break your heart so you get to break mine? Don't talk to me, Quinn and I mean it this time." With that last snarl she stormed away, Quinn couldn't see where.