5 Funny Funny

Raven was happy. Finally, she had a real, living friend at Hogwarts. Oh, he didn't know of it yet, but she was certain that the night at the infirmary had been the beginning of a wonderful friendship with Severus Snape.

She had no idea why she felt so drawn to him. He was a tad cranky, grumpy and sullen sometimes, and she had clearly not forgotten the times he had shoved her away because he preferred be with Lily Evans- well, that was understandable, given that Lily was pretty and popular. Nevertheless, Raven was quite certain that Severus would come to like her one day, and that his gruffness, his snide remarks were merely defensive means behind which he hid his true self, since deep down in his heart he was just as sad and lonely as she was.

On the other hand, he was really cool but not bragging about it like Potter and Black. He was more subtle in his ways, and he knew a lot; he was a clever boy. She was mesmerized.

Raven would have loved to follow him all over Hogwarts, but she wasn't stupid. Instinctively, she knew that such a brash behaviour would only make him feel trapped, and he'd run away from her. He didn't seem overly fond of too much mindless babbling, either, so she kept her gob shut for most of the time he was tolerating her presence- next to him at the Slytherin table for meals, or even at the library, when he was studying with Lily.

True, it wasn't hard for her to remain silent since she wasn't particularly used to talking to other students anyway. She was still as mute as a maggot in classes, unless it was too impolite to not answer a question addressed to her; however, Raven preferred to avoid these situations as good as she could.

Nevertheless, she noticed a slight change in her attitude that came along with less reluctance of using her wand to perform magic. It was as if a tiny little spark had been ignited, glimmering and glowing surreptitiously under the surface, ready to shine. And when she was around Severus, she wanted to shine; wanted to show her wonderful, enigmatic friend that she wasn't a hopeless case, not one of the dunderheads he so despised.

*

She was an enigma to him, one that Severus couldn't quite figure out. It had been so much easier to judge her when she was just that pampered, pathetic little girl to him. But it wasn't that simple- she was not that simple. There was more to her than meets the eye.

But what did Lestrange want from him? Why had she been so... so amiable towards him that night at the infirmary? He decided to keep a close eye on her.

She wasn't dumb, he'd give her that. Whatever she had in mind, she knew well enough to not pester him with her presence or the usual mindless prattle of girls. She merely smiled at him whenever they met, but remained silent until he would ask her something. Then she replied almost shyly and yet in comprehensible, sensible sentences.

No, Lestrange was really not stupid. She wasn't brilliant either; although she had pass grades in most of her subjects, an 'A' was just agreeable and nothing close to 'Outstanding', or even 'Exceeding Expectations.' He hadn't seen her cast a single spell yet, though casting spells was essential in most classes. So probably her essays saved her from failing miserably, he pondered, and pondering about Lestrange was something he did more often than he liked.

Of course, Lily seemed to appreciate his efforts in being less rude to Lestrange, thinking he'd come to see the error of his ways, and was therefore behaving more agreeably- when, in fact, he was simply curious. He preferred to know what was going on around him, because the more he knew, the better he could defend himself. Knowledge was power, and power was something he favoured. It was essential to have the upper hand when dealing with his fellow Slytherins, and to not get under the thumb of the older boys, like Lucius Malfoy- whom he secretly admired for his poised attitude and the way he was so above things...

Severus wanted to be like that, too. He wanted to impress, and most of all, he wanted to impress Lily. So when she was willing to include Lestrange into their little study group he didn't protest- but he would have preferred it to remain only the two of them.

*

The days were still getting longer and warmer as spring turned into summer. When it wasn't raining, the students enjoyed spending their free time outside on the grounds. But with the end of term approaching, you could notice a certain unrest among them. The seventh years were revising hard for their NEWTs, while at the same time feeling slightly melancholic because the end of their school days at Hogwarts was near. They would leave and not return at the end of summer; instead they would start a life as respectable members of the wizarding world, find a job and get married.

The fifth years were revising equally hard for their OWLs though their mood was rather hysteric and many of them had to see Madam Pomfrey for a Calming Draught. It was a mad time of year at Hogwarts.

The first years were nervous, too. None of them had ever sat a wizarding exam before, so they didn't know what to expect, and Lily, in particular, was very anxious. Since she was Muggleborn, she thought she had to do especially well in her finals to prove everyone she was worthy being a witch. She wanted to exceed expectations.

Her favourite subjects were Charms and Potions; she didn't worry about succeeding in those two classes. History of Magic, however, was her least favourite. It was hard to follow the droning voice of a teacher who wasn't even human- Professor Binns was a ghost, and he had probably died from listening to his own voice for far too long. So she didn't pay as much attention as she should in his class, when it was so much more fun to exchange messages with her Gryffindor friends. She could always rely on Raven taking notes.

History of Magic was Raven's best subject- simply because there was no need to perform magic in Professor Binns' class. You didn't even have to actively participate in his class, since he preferred to drone on and on without interruption. But he always graded her essays fairly, and she was quite good at writing essays.

She was a total disaster in Potions, although she actually liked it. Well, in theory. It was another class in which you didn't need to wave your wand but, alas, that didn't mean Raven was ever successful in brewing a decent potion. Instead, she messed it up, and it was always her cauldron that would boil over or explode, or the contents would become a sticky mass- and she had no clue what she was doing wrong. She always followed the instructions- perhaps not quite as carefully as she should have, because sometimes there was that itching in her fingers to give it a different approach than required, and while considering that, all went wrong again.

Professor Slughorn was not a great help. He seemed to ignore her, and at the end of term she scarcely managed to scrape a 'P'- poor- in Potions.

Of course, her parents weren't famous in the wizarding world. Raven had already realized how much he cared about those who might grant him a favour one day, and that she couldn't possibly keep up with them, but that was still no reason for ignoring her as much as he did. A good teacher, she thought, would help her instead of simply letting her down and considering her a lost cause, and his attitude bugged her tremendously because she would have liked to shine in his class, just like Severus did. Although, quite frankly, Professor Slughorn didn't pay him much attention either, despite his obvious brilliance.

And then, finally, came the last day of term.

Raven had survived her first year at Hogwarts and was looking forward to heading homewards, back to her loving family. Nevertheless, she decided to return in September for another year, since pretending to be a Squib was no longer an option. She had come to terms with being a witch- she couldn't change that fact anyway, so it was better to get used to it.

They were riding the train back to London in pretty much the same formation they had arrived at Hogwarts. Once again, Raven was in the same compartment with Lily and Severus, listening to Lily's cheerful prattle. And the red-head had every reason to be chirpy, given that she wasn't only a bright student, but also a very popular little witch. Everybody at Hogwarts liked Lily Evans- well, except for a few Slytherins taking offence in her blood status, but that exception only proved the rule. In fact, Lily was so popular that she couldn't spend all of her time with Raven and Severus. After a while she slipped through the compartment door to have a chat with her other friends- addresses had to be exchanged and promises were made that, of course, they'd write each other during the summer- and she didn't return until much later, when the Hogwarts Express was rolling through the outskirts of London.

Raven didn't miss her. She liked Lily because she was always kind to her, but she clearly didn't mind having Severus all to herself. If only he would have cared. Alas, the moment Lily left the compartment, he picked up a book and buried his large nose in it, clearly not interested in making conversation.

She cast a fleeting glance at him. He was her friend, who didn't even know he was her friend. Raven heaved a sigh. Then she put a bag of Muggle sweets- colourful Gummy Bears- on the table between them and grabbed a book as well, enjoying the companionable silence. But ever so often her eyes would leave the text in front of her to study his face.

Severus Snape was definitely the most interesting boy she had ever met.

*

The Hogwarts Express pulled into King's Cross Station. There was a hustle and bustle of students in the corridors, dragging their trunks. They were leaning out of the windows, waving their arms, eager to see their families again. No one would have admitted that, though. They were Hogwarts students and not babies anymore, and missing your parents was considered quite uncool.

Severus disembarked the train and glanced around the platform. Just as he had expected, his mother was nowhere in sight. Of course not. Apparently she had better things to do than picking up her only son. So he would have to take the Knight Bus back home... unless Lily's parents were going to give him a ride in their car.

He dreaded going back home- there'd be shouting and violence, and he hadn't quite learned how to handle that. But at least he could spend the entire summer with Lily, sitting at their favourite spot by the river, talking, revising all the things they'd learned that past year, dreaming of a better future...

"Will you write to me?" he heard Lestrange's voice coming from behind him.

"Of course I will," Lily answered promptly in his stead before she addressed Severus. "Are you coming? My parents won't wait forever and Tuney is already a tad impatient. You know she doesn't like our world."

He turned to follow her when he felt a small hand tugging at the sleeves of his robes.

"I mean, will you write to me?"

Severus froze in his tracks to scowl at Lestrange. Why should I?

"I don't have an owl. My father does not approve to them. He might roast them and pretend it's chicken."

She possessed the nerve to chuckle softly as though he'd made a joke, then she boldly stuffed a slip of paper into the pocket of his robes. "My postal address and my telephone number," she explained, flashing him a bright smile, "I guess your father does not eat postmen?"

What an annoying chit of a girl! Nevertheless, a slight smirk spread over his features, which apparently she took as an invitation to fling her arms around him- and hug him! Now that was really embarrassing! He was standing, clearly visible for everyone to see, at platform nine and three-quarters with a girl wrapped around him. And Lestrange of all people! Oh, he wouldn't hear the end of it should any of his fellow house mates witness that scene. She was the most unpopular girl in Slytherin- no, at Hogwarts.

And yet, strange feeling of warmth flushed through him. He didn't get hugged often- actually, rarely at all- and he wouldn't have minded if it had been Lily hugging him. But no, it had to be Lestrange.

"Oi! Look at that! Slimy Snivelly and the Fat Crow!" Severus heard someone shout, recognizing Potter's voice. For an instant, he wished the ground would open up and swallow him, then he fingered for his wand to defend himself from what was about to come. It wasn't easy with a girl still clinging onto him, who had all stiffened up.

"Two greasy oddballs!" Potter taunted them, but that was soon followed by a yelp escaping his lips.

Severus had finally freed himself of Raven Lestrange and whirled around to be met with the most astonishing sight. A dark-haired witch, dressed in elegant Muggle clothes, had unceremoniously grabbed his nemesis by the ear, twisting it painfully.

"You will not hex my daughter, young man, nor will you hex her friend. Do I make myself clear?"

Merlin, it was so good to see Potter winding and writhing under her grip. His wand dropped to the ground as he whispered his agreement."Unmistakably clear, Ma'am. But you might have got my intentions completely wrong..."

"Oh, I don't think so," said Mrs Lestrange calmly. "I know a bully when I see one."

"Let go of my son!" Another witch shrieked all of a sudden as she hurried to Potter's rescue. Apparently it was his mother, but she looked more like his granny.

Mrs Lestrange offered the witch a charming smile. "Pleased to meet you, Mrs Potter. Could you possibly spare a moment of your precious time? There's something I'd like to discuss with you."

Severus would have loved to hear what Mrs Lestrange had to say, but he had to catch up with Lily and her parents. However, when he glanced over his shoulder for a last time, he noticed that Mrs Potter didn't look all too happy.

*

"He's just a wee boy," Dorothea Potter defended her son, listening only half-heartedly to the other witch's accusations. Mrs Lestrange must be wrong, that didn't sound like her little James at all. "You know what boys are like- they fancy playing pranks on others, but it's harmless."

The Potters were an old and wealthy pure-blood family, and James was their only son, the only heir. Dorothea and James senior had gotten him when they were already quite old and had almost given up hope that their marriage would be blessed with children at all. Therefore he was their greatest joy, their little sunshine. Nigella understood that quite well, but that was still no reason to spoil him rotten and let him get away with everything.

"I do not consider a prank harmless if it results in the victim spending a night at the infirmary. I already complained about James' behaviour to Professor Dumbledore, but it is your responsibility to teach your boy some decent manners. Good day, Mrs Potter!"

*

Mr and Mrs Evans had always tolerated his friendship with Lily- perhaps because Severus was the only other magical child in their part of town, and they wanted to make sure their little witch daughter was doing well in the wizarding world. But he wasn't a fool. Although they made quite an effort to chide Petunia for her attitude, and even encouraged her to be more agreeable towards him, he knew as well that they didn't precisely approve of him as a person.

He was from Spinner's End, the most run-down street in town. Here, there were no decent people but day-labourers and unemployed folks; drunkards that wasted their dole on cheap booze in the local pub. Just like his father. And when he was drunk enough, he'd start shouting or worse.

The Evanses arched a brow at his bruises but didn't ask questions, and he was grateful for that. Severus didn't want to talk about his home life, not even to Lily. She didn't need to know how horrible it was sometimes, because he didn't want her pity. He was not a charity case.

Therefore, he often declined an offer for lunch or dinner at her parent's house, even if he was hungry. But he was also proud, and he couldn't stand Petunia secretly mocking his not-so-perfect table manners- although they had improved, recently. At Hogwarts, he had often watched Lucius Malfoy during meals, admiring his elegance at even the simplest things, and he had taken on to imitating him as good as possible. Severus liked to learn, because one day he wanted to leave that dunghill of his youth and become a respectable, esteemed member of wizarding society. And Lily would be at his side.

He dreamed of breakthroughs in Potions research they would come up with, and of course, one day they would marry. But that was just a dream, a dream he yearned to come true.

Summer was great because he spent a lot of time with Lily. Often, they sat at their favourite spot by the river, talking about the magical world that seemed so far away but was yet so close. Although their spot was decidedly Muggle and Hogwarts was many miles from here, it had it's very own magic since Lily was there. In the patches of sunlight that made it through the leaves of the old trees and bushes sheltering them, her hair shimmered like cascades of fire.

In those moments, he was so mesmerized by her he hardly noticed that he failed to capture her attention like he used to, when the wizarding world was just a vague idea to her, not real yet, and stories about Azkaban and the Dementors were still the most exciting things she'd heard. He had been her guide to this strange new world, then, and he had taken pride in telling her everything he knew, sparking her interest and her love for their world. But magic wasn't a theory to her any longer. Lily had already seen a fair share of the wizarding world; she had made friends with other wizarding kids. She didn't want to hear about Azkaban and the Dementors any more but talk about her friends instead. Alas, her friends were not a matter of interest to Severus, who called them mindlessly gossiping Gryffindor girls.

In moments like these she questioned her friendship with Severus, although she still considered him her best friend, holding him dear. She thought that once he'd get to know Mary, Patricia, Theresa and Rachel better, he might change his mind. Perhaps it was just that he hadn't made good friends himself- admittedly, that seemed to be a problem in Slytherin House, considering that all of his house mates were either arrogant or slightly creepy, with one exception and that was Raven Lestrange. She seemed to be a decent girl, and Lily was glad Severus had given up his rude behaviour towards her.

*

Severus couldn't believe his ears. It felt as if an icy cold shower had just rained down on him, the day when Lily told him she was going on vacation with her parents. Only two weeks in Brighton- but that was a very far distance away and two weeks without her seemed to be like an eternity of misery to him. What would he do without her? True, he could still visit their spot every day, reading all the books his father didn't approve of- well, his father didn't approve of reading in general. Tobias Snape called that a waste of time... but getting drunk all night was even more a waste of time, especially since he was drinking away the money they needed for living.

That man was a bloody hypocrite! He condemned the use of magic but nevertheless expected mother to help out whenever he deemed it suitable- like heating up his dinner with magic when the power was off once more, due to unpaid bills. And he would never understand Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration. You just couldn't Summon food or money out of thin air, and you couldn't make electricity work.

Therefore, Severus' home life was a misery of unpaid bills, no decent food on the table, and that all in a loveless atmosphere where his father would shout for no reason at all (just because he was pissed), his mother would shout back, and he would try to be invisible so that their frustration would not go off on him.

Mostly, he preferred to avoid his parents. It was easier when father got work and was out all day, when he was alone with his mother. In very rare moments she would even pretend she cared for him, give him books to read- but on that very day she handed him a postcard, addressed to him.

"Make sure your father doesn't see it. He won't approve of posh friends that go on holidays in Italy."

Does he approve of anything at all? Severus wondered. He had hoped that postcard would be from Lily, but his mother's words had shattered that hope. Lily was in Brighton, not in Italy. So he grabbed the postcard and stuffed it carelessly in the pocket of his oversized jeans as he made his way to the river. Sitting down at a place of pleasant memories, he missed Lily tremendously. She was the best thing in his miserable life; she was the reason for him to do better than his parents (well, it couldn't be worse anyway)

But this postcard was not from Lily, that much was sure. It showed a foreign fishing village with colourful houses, little boats at a beach, the blue of the sea battling the blue of the sky although you really couldn't compare these two blues for they were so different.

The stamp looked almost exotic to him, but not the handwriting. He recognised it immediately- Lestrange.

Dear Sev,

-just how many times had he told her that his name was Severus? And yet she insisted on calling him that stupid abbreviation of his given name! Well, he would have ignored it if Lily hadn't jumped on that train, thinking it cute to call him so. Ruffling his hair, he read on.

Greetings from Italy. We spent a good week driving through Tuscany, visiting many famous sights, but now we're at the Riviera. It is very nice here. The sun is shining and we go to the beach every day. I miss you and Lily.

Hope you have a nice summer.

I'm looking forward to see you again.

Yours,

Raven.

Stupid girl, he thought, although he had to admit he felt a tad flattered. It was the first postcard he had ever received, and it came from a long distance. By the end of the summer it was still his only postcard. He preferred to believe that Lily's must have gotten lost in the complicated ways of the Muggle postal system.

thanks to hypnotic. ink and Alabaster Princess

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