A/N: Sorry! Between the holidays and family drama, this chapter got pushed back. The next chapter is almost finished, so definitely expect that by the end of this week.
Balexi: Thank you! I hope you continue to enjoy the story!
Foreversmile: Thank you so much! :)
Ky: Thanks again for your review! And sorry about that! Hope you enjoyed the holidays! And don't be pissed at San, she'll be back to her charming self eventually ;)
TobiasFangor92: Aww, don't be too hard on her! She's still the same caring Santana we all know and love, she's just struggling right now. The trouble in paradise will only last a few chapters, so never fear!
unexpected sabotage: Haha, thank you! I apologize for the paranoia I've caused, but there's a storm brewing, so you'll definitely have to stay tuned for that! I hope you enjoy this next chapter :)
For the song in this chapter, lines "like this" are sung by Hermione, lines "like this" are sung by Sam and Hermione, and lines "like this" are sung by New Directions.
Thanks again for all of the feedback and, as always, enjoy!
~Chapter 41~
A few weeks later, Hermione walked into the choir room with Quinn only to find themselves the first ones to arrive.
"So how are things going with Lopez?" The blonde asked reluctantly as they sat down in the back row.
"Well, we haven't talked since the night of the benefit concert," the British girl replied with a frown. The former head cheerleader studied the girl next to her, noticing how tired and forlorn she appeared and sighed sadly.
"Look, Hermione, if things are meant to work out, they will. You've just got to try and stay positive," Quinn told her even though it was killing her on the inside.
"Thanks, Q. I'm really glad I have you as a friend," the young witch responded with a bright smile causing the hazel-eyed girl's heart to flutter.
"No problem. So, um, have they gotten any closer to find that man that hurt you, Puck, and Sam?"
"No, unfortunately. It's like he and the other few remaining dark wizards disappeared off the face of the planet," Hermione huffed, rubbing her forehead with one of her hands. "It worries me. I have this horrible feeling that something terrible is going to happen." Before Quinn could respond, the other members of the New Directions and Mr. Schue hurried into the room.
"I can't believe she's even considering it!" Mercedes said quickly, throwing her arms up in the air.
"Well, she wouldn't be if Finn hadn't decked her in the face," Puck growled out, glaring at the awkward teen.
"Yeah, Finn, you've almost been in glee club for two years and you still suck at dancing," Mike pointed out with a roll of his eyes.
"Hey!"
"Guys, settle down," the choir director called out from his office.
"Oh, look, here she comes," whispered Tina, pointing at the door. Hermione zoned out as Rachel began to explain what the doctor told her and focused her gaze on the Latina occupying her thoughts. She was jerked out of her thoughts when she heard Rachel utter a few alarming words.
"Oh my god, you're getting a nose job," Quinn stated with a slight smirk as the group stared at the tiny diva in shock.
"I'm considering having a minor procedure to repair my deviated septum," Rachel said calmly.
"So a nose job?" Santana spoke up bluntly.
"Look, I'm happy with the way that I look, ok? I've embraced my nose, but let's say I wanted to have a slightly more demure nose…like Quinn's, for example. I would never change my appearance for vanity, but the doctor said that it could possibly improve my talent which could help us all with Nationals."
"But, Rach, what about the risks involved? Besides, you're already extremely talented, there's no reason to—" Hermione began before she was interrupted by the raven-haired girl across the room.
"Hold up. Could we all just get real here for a second? I hear that Rachel's got a bit of a schnoz. I mean, I wouldn't know because, like Medusa, I try to avoid eye contact with her, but can we all just stop lying about how there are all things that we wouldn't change about ourselves? I mean, I'm sure that Sam's been at the doctor's office and rifled through pamphlets on mouth reduction. I'll bet Artie has thought about getting his legs removed since he's not really using them anyways. And I'm definitely sure that Tina's looked into getting an eye de-slanting."
"For the love of god, Santana. Get over yourself. Just because you're pissed at me gives no reason for you to belittle everyone else."
"Fine. Want me to include you? How 'bout you get that stick removed out of your ass? Or how 'bout you find a better way to cover up those scars? Ooh, or how about you work on getting rid of that stupid hero complex? Seriously. How can you be so nice all the damn time? It's nauseating."
"Bloody hell, Santana. I see you're clearly trying to win me back," the wavy-haired brunette snapped back before storming out of the room. A few seconds later, the group winced upon hearing the sound of someone repeatedly punching the lockers before it became silent once more.
"Hey, all I'm trying to say is that if you see something about yourself that you don't like, change it," Santana muttered, a guilty expression crossing over her face before she put her mask back up.
"Way to go, Santana," Quinn snarled at the raven-haired girl. "If you keep treating her like that, it's going to be easy for someone to swoop in and take her from you," the hazel-eyed girl told her with a smirk before hurrying after the British girl. Only one person noticed the falter in the Latina's posture and vowed to confront her.
"Um, ok, guys. We'll talk more about this tomorrow, alright? Class dismissed." After the room had emptied out, Puck hesitantly approached Santana.
"Dude, you gotta stop treating people like that, especially Hermione if you want to get her back."
"Oh, fuck off, Puckerman. You're just as bad as I am."
"I was just as bad as you, yes. But I've changed and everyone can see that. Now what's got you so pissy?"
"I just miss being with Mia," she murmured quietly, letting go of her cold exterior. "And Fabray is trying to get with her, I just know it."
"Ok, ignoring that. If you miss her so much, why are you being such a bitch to her? It's only going to push her farther away," the boy with the mohawk pointed out with a raise of one of his eyebrows as he sat down next to her.
"I guess I just don't want her to see how miserable I am without her."
"Well, she did say this was only a break, right?" The Latina nodded slowly. "Then work on becoming more comfortable with yourself and then work on patching things up with Hermione. You need to apologize to her first though."
"Yeah, I know you're right. You know how hard this is for me though."
"I do," the football player agreed with her and the two sat in silence for a while. "You know, I always thought you'd have this sexuality crisis over Brittany."
"I felt stuff for Brit in the past. I mean, how could I not? But those feelings were nothing compared to what I feel for Hermione. I've really screwed up," the brown-eyed girl groaned, burying her face in her hands.
"Apologize to her as soon as you can and try to stop saying such stupid things, then we'll work on the next part of the plan, ok?" Santana nodded and allowed herself to be hugged by the boy before going off in search of Hermione. After looking in the Spanish classroom, the auditorium, and the library, the Latina hadn't had any luck. She let out a frustrated sigh and walked over to the one person she wanted to avoid.
"Have you seen Hermione?" She muttered quietly.
"I believe I saw her running around the track. Don't be an ass to her again, Santana," Rachel replied with a glare before storming off. The former cheerleader hurried to the field and smiled softly upon seeing the wavy-haired brunette running laps in shorts and a sports bra. She jogged to catch up with her.
"Hey, can we talk?" Santana inquired nervously.
"I suppose. What do you want?" Hermione replied slowing down her run and plopping down on a nearby bench. "San, my eyes are up here," the British girl stated with a roll of her eyes, the corners of her lips slightly twitching.
"I'm sorry for what I said today. You know I didn't mean any of it. Well, I didn't mean any of the things I said to you. I just…really miss you."
"I haven't gone anywhere."
"You know what I mean," Santana murmured, finally sitting down. "I miss holding you and kissing you and making love to you and just being with you in general."
"I miss all of that too, San. I'm not going back on what I said though," the British girl responded softly, gently grabbing the other girl's hand.
"I know and I don't expect you to. I'm going to try being more comfortable with my…sexuality," the raven-haired girl finished slowly.
"You promise?" The former Cheerio nodded sincerely, earning a smile from the older girl. "Ok, good. Um, can I call you tonight? Going without our nightly phone calls is making my nightmares so bloody awful."
"Yeah, of course, Mia. We'll get through this, won't we?"
"I think so. I have faith in you, Santana Lopez. I'll talk to you later," Hermione said while giving the other girl's hand a gentle squeeze before releasing it. "Oh, and tomorrow you're apologizing to everyone."
"I will as long as you do something to heal your hand," the Latina spoke up causing the other girl to look down at her swollen, bruised hand.
"Oh, yeah, I promise," she responded sheepishly before walking away.
"See you later, mi amor," the younger girl mumbled sadly before standing up and heading in the opposite direction.
The next afternoon, the New Directions eyed Miss Pillsbury curiously as their choir director wrote something on the whiteboard. Hermione gave Santana a pointed look as the Latina stood up with a roll of her eyes.
"Um, I just wanted to apologize for all of the things I said yesterday. It wasn't cool, so yeah, sorry."
"Has hell frozen over?" Mercedes whispered to Tina with wide eyes. The raven-haired girl shifted nervously under the intense scrutiny directed at her before she returned to her seat.
"Uh, why is Miss Pillsbury here?" Finn finally questioned after he recovered from Santana's apology.
"She's helping us out with this week's assignment. Now, this is the only club at school that is represented by just about every race, religion, sexual orientation, and clique, but many of you are still having a hard time with acceptance."
"That's crazy, Mr. Schue, we love each other."
"Now, I won't deny that you accept each other, but you don't accept yourselves. This week's assignment has two parts. I want all of you to sing songs about accepting yourself for who you are. The best and the worst parts."
"What's the second part?"
"Well, we're gonna do a group number by the queen of self-love…Gaga. We're gonna perform her anthem to acceptance…Born This Way."
"Wait, wait, I still don't know why Miss Pillsbury is here."
"I'm here to help you with your costumes for the big number. Each of you will be issued a beautifully fitted white t-shirt. We will then use this letter press to write a word or a phrase that best describes the thing about you that you're the most ashamed of or that you'd like to change, but you can't because you were born that way which is super terrific."
"Uh, Will, what if we put something that describes us that we're not really ashamed of?" Hermione inquired with a tilt of her head.
"What did you have in mind, Mia?"
"Likes girls, of course. It's not something I'd want to change though," she stated with confident smile and a wink.
"That's perfectly ok. Now you guys have an idea of the types of things that should be on your shirt. And don't forget to wear your shirts with pride! Good luck this week!" Mr. Schue told them with ecstatically as he dismissed them.
"Hey, Sammy, I have a proposition for you," Hermione called out to the boy before he could walk away.
"Sure, Herms, what's up?" The football player asked her with a crooked grin.
"Wanna help me perform a song for this week's lesson?"
"Yeah, that'd be awesome! What did you have in mind?" Hermione leaned up to whisper her idea into the boy's ear. "Oh, man, that's perfect. I'm assuming I'm playing guitar. What are you playing?"
"Um, I was thinking the drums."
"I'm sure you get asked this a lot, but is there anything you can't do?" Sam inquired while looking at the girl in awe.
"Apparently, I'm not too good at maintaining a relationship," the British girl grumbled. "Enough about that though. Wanna work on it after school today? We can rehearse in the auditorium."
"Yeah, sounds great. See you then, Herms!" The blonde hugged her before hurrying to his next class.
Later that night, Hermione disapparated from the alley next to their building and appeared in a nearby forest, clearly shaken up from the letter she had just received from Remus.
"How could Ron be missing?" She grumbled to herself before whipping out her wand. She started casting spells at the various trees and boulders around her, feeling conflicted over her feelings about her former friend's disappearance. "For fuck's sake, Ronald," she cried out angrily, destroying another tree. Suddenly, her phone began to ring. "What?" She snapped.
"Whoa, hey, it's me," the voice on the phone said calmly. "Are you ok, Mia?"
"Oh, sorry, San. I forgot you were calling."
"You sound out of breath. What's wrong?" The Latina questioned worriedly.
"Oh, nothing, I just went out into the woods to practice some magic…" Hermione trailed off, uncertainly.
"Ok, now I know you're lying. C'mon, you can talk to me. What's going on?"
"I have a bad feeling that something terrible is happening in the wizarding world. Something that we're not expecting, but I can't figure out what it is. And now Ronald has apparently gone missing and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be feeling about that."
"You should be feeling some fucking relief. You don't need that fucking ginger in your life as far as I'm concerned."
"San…" The British girl began before chuckling slightly.
"As for the other part…have you spoken with Harry about your concerns?"
"Not yet. He's off on some mission and contacting him is nearly impossible until it's over. I don't know what to do!"
"Princesa, you don't need to get yourself all worked up. Please calm down. There's nothing you can do about it now, so why don't you go home and get some sleep and we can try working through this more tomorrow?"
"You really want to try and help me figure all of this out?"
"Well, naturally. You're the most important person in my life right now and I don't like to see you so upset. Er, well, hear you so upset, I guess," the former Cheerio stated uncomfortably.
"You're ridiculous," the older girl muttered playfully.
"Shh, that's our little secret."
"Thanks, San. I don't know what I'd do without you."
"No problem, Mia. Now pop on home and call me once you're settled into bed and we can talk until you fall asleep, alright?"
"Ok, dear. Talk to you soon," Hermione responded with a giggle.
A few days later, the young witch stood in front of her fellow glee club members with Sam.
"Alright, guys, Sam and I have prepared a song that truly exemplifies this week's lesson. I'm sure you know the song, so feel free to join in," the wavy-haired brunette informed them with a dazzling smile before walking over to the drum set. She nodded at Sam and he soon began playing the familiar notes of the intro before Hermione joined him on the drums and started singing.
"Hey, don't write yourself off yet,
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on.
Just try your best, try everything you can.
And don't you worry what they tell themselves when you're away."
After she finished singing the first verse, Sam beamed at her before joining in on the chorus.
"It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine, everything, everything will be alright, alright."
"Hey, you know they're all the same.
You know you're doing better on your own, so don't buy in.
Live right now.
Yeah, just be yourself.
It doesn't matter if it's good enough for someone else."
By this point the rest of the teenagers had stood up and danced over to the two musicians to join them on the chorus.
"It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine, everything, everything will be alright, alright.
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine, everything, everything will be alright, alright."
"Hey, don't write yourself off yet.
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on.
Just do your best, do everything you can.
And don't you worry what the bitter hearts are gonna say."
"It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine, everything, everything will be alright, alright.
It just takes some time, little girl you're in the middle of the ride.
Everything, everything will be just fine, everything, everything will be alright, alright."
As the performance came to an end, Rachel pulled Hermione away from the drums and hugged her tightly.
"Mia, Sam, that was great! You definitely understood this week's assignment!" Mr. Schue praised as he clapped Sam on the back. While the group was busy chatting with themselves about their t-shirt ideas, Hermione looked the tiny diva in the eyes.
"Rach, you don't have to get that silly nose job, ok? You are so beautiful the way you are on the inside as well as the outside. Surely, you can see that. And your voice is magnificent. I know you'll win a bunch of Tony's in the future, so why risk hindering that?"
"You really have a way with words, you know? Finn's not nearly as articulate as you are when it comes to making a point. Your words though and that performance finally opened my eyes, I guess. I'm not going to get the surgery," Rachel responded shyly.
"Really?" The shorter girl nodded. "That's great!" Hermione squealed as she lifted her up and spun her around causing the other girl to burst out laughing. Neither of them noticing the fond look Santana was throwing at the older girl.
"Don't worry, Sanny, you'll have her back in no time," Brittany whispered happily into the Latina's ear.
"You think so, Brit-Britt?" The raven-haired girl questioned with a small smile.
"Oh, I know so, she's totally your lobster!" The bubbly blonde told her while clapping her hands excitedly. Santana simply beamed at her before turning back to watch the wavy-haired brunette chatting cheerfully with some of the other members.
A/N, part II: Song was "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World. I hope you liked this chapter!