Note 1: the after-hospital scene with Yosuke was a scene from the anime. It touched me deeply when I saw it, and I actually wept with Souji...
" Dream... "
Guilt.
He couldn't sleep that night. That phone call bothered him more then he thought it would. From all of his friends, Yosuke was the one that meant the most to him.
His mind wandered back to that faithful day when Nanako had died. He and his friends left the hospital in silence, and he felt so bad that he didn't know what to do with himself. Sure, he was angry and sad but he was so in conflict with himself that his face remained blank. It surprised him then when his friends gave him brief goodbyes and hurried to their homes. His niece just died, and no one bothered to hug him or offer their shoulder for him to cry on. No, they left him all alone in the dark while the snow continued to fall down on him. But just before the first tear could fall he got startled by a sudden sound. Behind him stood Yosuke with a grave expression on his face. Souji just stared at him for a while until he finally broke down. He began to cry, scream and weep all at the same time while the brunette hugged him in a tight embrace. They just stood there until Souji just passed out from all the emotions and the fatigue.
It was Yosuke that called a cab and brought the two of them safely back to the Dojima residence. He carefully placed the silverhead on the sofa and kneeled in front of him. The tears continued to fall from Souji's cheeks even when he was asleep.
From time to time the brunette would gently wipe them away and pat the boys head. He would whisper that everything would be ok and that they would get the killer no matter what would happen. And then he said he would stay next to his side that evening.
The next morning when Souji woke up he found Yosuke sleeping on his futon next to the sofa. Yes, he kept his promise to stay with him.
After that you would think that their bond would've gotten even stronger, but instead it felt like they became more separate. Yosuke would quietly distance himself to the point where they lost contact with each other. Did something happen that night? Souji was sound asleep, so he cannot remember if anything happened.
And now, after months, Yosuke decided to call him. Why now? Why not earlier when he needed to hear Yosuke's voice?
Souji kept turning and turning in his bed until he became so mad that he turned the lights on and left his bedroom. He walked down the stairs and agreed that a late midnight snack would do him good. But just as he entered the living room he noticed that the lights where still on. He found Dojima sitting on the sofa with a bottle of beer in his hands. He had a cigarette in his mouth and he was staring holes in the ceiling, Whatever he was seeing must've been very important because he didn't even see Souji coming down the stairs. Without knowing why he walked towards his uncle and sat down next to him. His eyes trailed to the exact same spot where Dojima's eyes were staring at, and immediately a soft laugh broke the silence.
" Don't tell me you can't sleep. " Said the detective. " You, who looks like he hasn't gotten any sleep in ages. "
" Me? " Snorted Souji back. " Have you seen a mirror lately? The bags under your eyes continue to darken and you should really shave yourself one of these days. Long beards aren't attractive you know. "
Dojima laughed again, only this time louder. Then his face went back to its usual I-am-worried-mode.
" If anyone would tell me that all of this would've happened two years ago... My daughters' dying, the murders, Namatame's execution, the fog... I would've said that that person was crazy. Ever since you came here things have been... unusual. "
The boy sighed. " Tell me about it, it seems like I was born with some very bad luck. "
" Souji... " Dojima turned his head to face his nephew. " I have been thinking about something for quite some time now. I think it's time I asked you about it. The thing is... well... ever since you've left this house has become awfully... empty. So... I was wondering, would you like to live here permanently? "
The boy blinked a few times with his eyes and also turned his face. Immediately he met the warm loving gaze that belonged to his uncle.
" W-what? " he stuttered a little confused.
" Would you like it? I mean, you have friends here and you can continue your studies over here. There is a good college not far from here, and you've become nicely acquainted to this place... But, I wont force you and I don't expect an answer right away. Go think about it for a while and let me know once you've come up with an answer alright? "
The boy gave a faint nod, completely flabbergasted.
" You are like a son to me Souji, and I love you very much. "
The man stood up, ruffled the boy's hair, and without looking back or saying anything he headed for the stairs and made his way towards his bedroom.
The boy ran a hand over his face and a happy smile appeared on his lips. Dojima wanted him in his house permanently? Was that even possible? Would that mean that Dojima would... adopt him? He could leave his house and his parents for good?
The thought about leaving an empty house and moving to a warm house with a loving uncle included made his heart swell and pump faster. Yes, he certainly liked that idea. He was going to take Dojima on his word and think about it for a while, but his heart had more or less already decided for him.
After this short conversation with his uncle he slept like a baby...
However the next day when he woke up he felt just as bad like he had been feeling days ago. His mind screamed at him to not go meet Yosuke, but his heart still guided him to Junes.
The walk towards the shopping centre had been really awkward. The fog was so thick that you couldn't see past three to four meters in front of you. Thanks to that he bumped quite frequent into other people, and he nearly hit a street pole as well.
Souji was really happy and thankful when he finally managed to enter Junes, and he immediately made his way to their former 'hideout'. When he sat down on a chair an employee approached him and asked him if he wanted to drink or eat anything. He ordered a soda for himself and waited impatiently for his friend to arrive as well.
while he drank his soda he began to think about how he should converse with his friend. Should he act like nothing happened? as in ignoring that Yosuke never sought contact with him? Or should he be mad? He had absolutely no idea what to do. In the end he decided it would be for the better if he just went with the flow and go with his instinct.
After what seemed like hours a silhouette emerged from the fog and it turned out to be Yosuke. His hair was shorter then it used to be, and it looked like he had lost a little weight.
Souji waved with his hand in the air and signaled to the other boy to come on over to where he was sitting. The brunette gave a faint wave back and slowly made his way to the silverhead. He sat down in the chair on the opposite side of Souji, and he gave a faint smile when their eyes met.
They began to converse with each other. Yosuke would tell Souji about his new college and house, and Souji said how he had been killing time since he had left Inaba. It was a fairly normal conversation, and any outsider would think that nothing was going on between to two teens.
But something was up. Every time when Souji was talking and Yosuke was listening, there was this strange look in the eyes of the brunette. It's kind of hard to explain what kind of look it is, but it was almost like Yosuke was searching for something. His eyes went from the silverheads' face, to his shirt, to his pants and back up. Then, he looked around for a little bit.
" Is... something the matter? " Asked Souji confused. " You seem very occupied. "
Yosuke moved his chair sideways until he sat next to his friend.
" Souji, I didn't come here to talk about things like the weather. I came because after all this time I have to tell you something... Because of our friendship I kept it hidden deep within me, but after hearing of Naoto's disappearance I decided it would be for the best if I confronted you about it. So I am going to ask you a question and I want an honest answer alright? "
Souji raised an eyebrow and gave a nod.
" Way back, when you, Naoto and me were outside in the snow guessing the killer, it was like you wanted to say something right? I could see that pained look in your eyes... but you didn't say anything. That had me confused for a long time until a certain event.
Remember the day that Nanako died? You passed out and I brought you back to your house. I laid you down on the sofa and from time to time I would wipe your tears away. I even whispered to you that I would stay at your side and I did... but then you began to talk in your sleep. Souji, you were apologizing to Nanako over and over again because you knew who the killer was but you refused to say its name out loud. You killed her because you didn't want to end up all alone.
Something inside me told me that I had to keep listening, So I ran my hand through your hair and said that everything would be ok.
And then you said the name of the killer; Adachi.
I was so shocked and surprised at the same time that I froze in my tracks and didn't dare to move. So many thoughts were whirling around in my head like a big hurricane. Nanako died for nothing? Our leader was defending a killer? Was our entire investigation a big lie to you? Not knowing what to do I broke contact with you. I didn't know what to do... You were our leader and I looked up to you! I couldn't turn you in, and I couldn't tell our friends about the discovery. You are... were... my friend. How could you do this to all of us?! "
Yosuke's eyes became redder by the second, and it was very obvious that he was holding back his tears. Souji eyes went from the brunette's face to the ground. He had no words and feelings like guilt and shame began to stab at his heart. Yes, he had made a mistake and he had to live with it for the rest of his life. He had been so selfish, and look where it brought him! Bedding a maniac and abandoned by his friends.
Souji took a deep breath.
" I never wanted for any of this to happen... " He said, his voice hoarse and broken. " I was just terrified. I was so terrified that you guys would leave me after the case was solved... I just panicked and I just couldn't think straight anymore. I made a very bad decision and if I gained a second chance I would certainly change everything. But I can't... So instead I want to make up for it the best I can. "
Yosuke crossed his arms. " What do you mean? "
" Adachi is still out there, and so is the fog. Both of them have to be stopped before everyone can live happily again. As things are now, the fog keeps spreading and Adachi keeps getting stronger. His hunger for death will only increase to a point where he will kill humankind permanently. It's my duty to stop him... but I can't do that if I am locked in prison. Yosuke, you are free to turn me in but can you wait a little bit longer? "
The brunette sighed and frowned deeply.
" You destroyed any faith I had in you, and I honestly don't know if I can trust you. But you sound genuine and to be honest I want to believe in you again. Yes, I will work with you. Let's make sure that Adachi pays for everything he has done! "
To be continued~~~
Note2: I just want to make clear to everyone that .FINISH this story no matter what. If I don't update for a while it means that either I don't have time to write, or I have a writers block. I take great care making sure my chapters are interesting, and I've lost count how many times I have erased chapters to begin anew, simply because I thought it sucked. I love all the support I have been getting from you guys, and as my thanks I will finish this story.