VIII

September 10th, 2010 – Brooklyn.

Jesse's eyes fluttered open as his blurred vision began to clear. He bolted up quickly, unsure of where he was at first. His hands gripped the soft cotton sheets and he took in the dark red paint of the walls around him. He wasn't in an underground cell. This wasn't all one big dream. Slowly but surely, he rose from the bed, raking his hands through his newly cut hair. He let out a small sigh as he mentally prepared himself to head downstairs and face the day.

As soon as he opened the door, the smell of fresh coffee and toast wafted into his nose. He felt his heart wrench for a brief moment as memories surged back. Making breakfast for Jane, sitting down at the table with Brock and Andrea. He gripped the railing as he slowly made his way down the stairs doing best to suppress his feelings. Jesse didn't want to shove anymore of his emotional bullshit onto Felicity's plate. She had already done so much for him.

"Good morning!" she chimed as she pulled out a box of fruit loops from a cabinet. "Did you sleep well?"

"Morning," Jesse mumbled offering her a small wave. "It was a lot better than sleeping on a shitty old futon, I'll say that much."

Felicity make a small 'hm' sound as she placed the cereal box on the table. She had already laid out the milk and bowls as well as a jug of orange juice and a plate of toast. Jesse still looked a bit ragged but she supposed the scars on his face had a lot to do with it. She glanced at him as he sat down and poured himself some cereal. Felicity brought over the coffee pot and took a seat at the table.

She didn't end up getting much sleep herself. She stayed up for most of the night mulling over thoughts about the man sleeping in the other room. She wanted to help him – to fix him – but she couldn't do any more than what she was already doing. It hurt to see him so broken but she couldn't even begin to try to understand what he had been through. They had been so close growing up and it was just hard to deal with the fact that they were two different people now.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, sliding the coffee pot over to him.

"Better, thanks… And uh… Sorry… About last night," he apologized as he poured a cup of coffee.

Felicity shook her head. "No, no, no, don't worry about it, Jesse. Just… Just remember… I'm here for you, alright?"

Jesse nodded slowly, "Yeah, thanks…"

"Anyway… I'll get your pictures done today and I'll show you to your apartment. It'll take a day or two for me to get all the work done but in that time we can go pick up some clothes for you or something, sound good?"

He nodded again.

She gave him a small smile before continuing to eat her breakfast. She didn't say much after that. Jesse was sure that his little episode the night before had shaken her in some way. Hopefully, after today, he would be able to get his life on track and get out of hers for good. There was no way he was going to let her stick around him. He was done with putting people he cared about in danger.

Breakfast was uneventful. It seemed as if both of them were at a loss for words. Felicity had disappeared soon after loading the dishes into the dishwasher and had told him to feel free to make himself at home. She pointed out the remote control for the television and even opened up her game collection to him before taking off to do something else. Jesse had switched on the TV for the sake of having the sound of someone else's voice around. Silence was terrifying. He had spent countless hours milling about a quiet lab, the only voices he heard belonging to those god damn demented hicks. It was just nice to hear someone else talk for once.

Jesse plopped down on the couch and picked up a photograph off the side table. It was of Felicity and her parents. It must have been an old picture because her hair was still short. Her father had certainly aged but her mother looked completely the same. Or, almost. He was pretty sure she had some work done on her face – but that was beside the point. For the first time, Jesse began to think of his parents – of his brother. They probably all thought he was dead now. Part of him was still angry at them for all that they had done, but most of him was glad that nothing had happened to them. They were safe. Still, he wondered what they were up to. Did they miss him? One of the last things Jesse remembered Jake saying to him was that the talked about him all the time. He could feel tears well up in his eyes. He growled and wiped them away before they could fall. He refused to breakdown again. He was getting a new life. He had no choice but to leave everything behind.

Footsteps alerted him of Felicity's presence. He didn't know how long she had been standing there but he quickly placed the frame back on the table.

"Well, I'm all set up. You ready to take a few pictures?" she inquired.

Jesse raked his hands through his hair and stood up slowly, giving her a quick nod. "Yeah, let's get this done."

She returned his nod and gestured for him to follow her. Felicity was wearing a simple outfit made up of jeans and a black t-shirt. Her hair wasn't brushed and tied into a loose ponytail. Jesse had noticed how tired she looked but didn't think that he was in the position to say anything about it.

Eventually, they ended up in her basement. It was finished and just as well furnished as the rest of the house. There was a similar set up to the one in the basement of the bar with a desk, a computer, a white pull down screen and a tripod. Felicity clapped her hands together and let out a loud sigh.

"Alright, step in front of the screen, please," she said, her voice sounding oddly serious as if she had just flipped right into work mode. Jesse complied, standing in front of the screen. He didn't have to go to much trouble to keep a stoic face. Felicity got behind the camera and snapped a few photos. Not even the flash phased him.

"Okay, all done," she stated as his picture came up on the computer monitor. There was already a template open for New York driver's license. The name that was typed onto it was 'Alexander DiGianfelice' as well as a bit more fake information.

Felicity was already half way out of the basement before she called out to him. "You can see that later. I think that your new apartment'll be a little more interesting."

It wasn't too long later before they were getting out of her car and into an apartment elevator. The building itself was pretty new looking. Felicity had said that it was only built a few years ago. They got off on the twelfth floor. The suite was at the end of the hallway, suite 1201.

"Well, here it is," Felicity said as she opened the door. She let Jesse walk in first as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Damn…" Jesse said under his breath.

It was a large pre-furnished suite complete with a black leather couch and loveseat, a glass coffee table and a large wall mounted flat-screen television. The kitchen was equipped with stainless steel appliances and a granite countertop and the floor was covered in white tile. There were large windows that showed off an amazing view Jesse didn't really know what he was expecting but this was probably way beyond anything he could have come up with himself.

"It's all pretty standard – the first three months are already paid off but utilities are included, hydro, internet, cable… No smoking, no pets, the usual for a place like this – smoke on the balcony if you need to..." she explained.

"No smoking, no pets, you want to smoke, you do it outside."

Jesse felt his mouth run dry.

"…You okay?" Felicity's voice probed his head.

He blinked and stared at her for a few moments before nodding vigorously. "Y-Yeah, I'm fine."

Felicity pursed her lips and let it slide. This hadn't been the first time she noticed him spacing out but she figured that whatever was on his mind was none of her business. Maybe it was naïve of her, but she was constantly trying to forget that there was almost ten years of missed history between them and that this Jesse Pinkman wasn't the same eighteen year old that she had been friends with for so long. Of course, she had changed as well but she was going to do her best to keep that from compromising their friendship.

"Mm, alright, well – that's about it! This place is all yours. I handle all the paperwork and I'll probably be over in the next few days or so to drop it off. I'll also get you a resume with some reputable sources so you can get a job somewhere."

Jesse tried his best to listen to what he was saying but all he could really think about was Jane. Felicity wandered down the hallway with the intention of showing him the washroom and the bedroom but all he could really see was Jane's slender figure retreating into bedroom. He could almost smell her perfume wafting around the apartment and hear her laughter in his ears. He felt his heart clench. Jesse watched as Felicity pointed out the various other features of the apartment but all he could hear was Jane's voice.

"Jesse? You ready to go?" Felicity suddenly asked.

"…Go? Uh… Where?" he questioned, feeling slightly bad for not listening to her.

She was already half way out the door, keys hanging off her finger. As much as Jesse didn't want to worry her, it seemed as if he was doing the exact opposite. He was relieved that she hadn't called him out on it like she would've when they were kids but couldn't help but feel a bit bad for being so much trouble.

"Shopping, obviously. I don't think you can last the rest of your life in just that one shirt and pair of sweatpants," she chuckled.

Felicity had been nothing but lighthearted and understanding since he had showed up at the bar. Jesse figured it was mostly because she was trying to make him more comfortable. She wasn't going to get anywhere by being condescending. Regardless of how aloof he was, Felicity kept acting as if they had been in contact since high school. He was grateful for it, of course. Sure, he had always had Badger, Combo and Skinny Pete - and while their friendship was one hundred percent genuine, it always ended up coming back to drugs, whether it be marijuana or meth. Felicity had always been a constant in his life regardless of how much he fucked up.

"Oh, yeah, right. Let's go do that, then," Jesse conceded, taking one more glance at the apartment before following her out.

The apartment was not too far from downtown which made for a short car ride to the nearest mall. Felicity dragged him to a rather high end looking department store where most of the merchandise was a far cry from his old fashion preferences. He had long since dropped his gangster attitude in exchange for a more mature lifestyle – one that included cooking meth for stone faced businessmen and back door hicks.

"Well, feel free to get whatever you want, um, just don't forget the basics, boxers and socks and stuff. We can pick up some like toiletries at the drug store later," Felicity said, looking at a rack of sweaters.

Jesse snorted, "Yeah, yeah, thanks mom."

Felicity looked a bit surprised at his comment – and she most certainly was; but in a good way. That was more like the old Jesse she knew. After getting over the initial shock she only shook her head, laughing. "Eh, I'm not quite ready to be a MILF yet. Hah. Anyway, c'mon, let's see what we can find for you."

She saw the most fleeting of smiles appear on his face before she walked past him in search of more clothes. Maybe there was hope for him yet. Felicity knew it would take some time but she hoped that this was a good sign.

After picking up a few shirts, a couple of pants and one or two sweaters – along with all the basics, they left the department store with an ample supply of shopping bags. Felicity had paid for all of it, luckily without any questioning from Jesse. The last thing she needed was him getting curious as to where she was getting her money from. He probably figured that her 'extracting' business was all that she had – and it was probably best if it stayed that way. As much as she hated the idea of keeping secrets from him, as long as he didn't ask, he wouldn't need to know.

"So like… How are your parents?" Jesse suddenly asked as he clipped his seatbelt on.

Felicity recalled him looking at one of her pictures in her living room. "Hm? Oh, yeah, last time I saw them, they were doing pretty good."

"Yeah? When was that?"

She gulped. "Uh… A few years ago."

Jesse raised a brow. Growing up, Felicity had always seemed really close with her parents. He would never admit it but sometimes he was a bit jealous. His parents were constantly angry or disappointed with him but Felicity's parents always had her on a pedestal. Regardless of what they had heard about him, her parents were always nothing but kind to him. Jesse always felt like Felicity had a hand in all of that. He and his gang of friends weren't the only boys that would hang around Felicity. She always had another group of more seemingly straight edge friends but whenever they were all under one roof, such as at school events or birthday parties, Mr. Scott had always seemed more accommodating to Jesse's little troupe.

"I… I mean that was the last time I saw them in person at least. I've spoken to them on the phone and all that stuff," she recovered.

Her relationship with her parents had been rocky for the past few years. Circumstances had forced her to try to break all communication with them but it hadn't worked for long. These days, she would receive a check in call every now and again which wasn't all too bad. White Felicity still loved her parents to death, it was just too complicated to stay in regular contact with them.

"I see, well, that's cool… Hah, my parents are probably having a field day…" Jesse mumbled, eyes glazing over as he watched the scenery pass outside.

"Don't be like that Jesse… I'm sure they miss you more than anything…" Felicity reassured as she shot him a glance.

Neither of them were up to talking past that point. They were both too busy mulling over their familial relationships to say anything.

As soon as they arrived at the grocery store, Felicity's demeanor immediately changed. She hopped out of her car and quickly fetched a shopping cart. She caught Jesse staring at her with a confused look on his face. She simply chuckled.

"If you tell me you've forgotten about Funyun chicken I'm going to kick your ass," Felicity laughed.

He narrowed his eyes at her, wracking through his brain in an attempt to remember what she was talking about. Jesse frowned, shrugging.

"Uh… I got nothing."

Felicity rolled her eyes as she started making her way down the aisles. She threw in a few kitchen essentials into the cart.

"Are you joking? God, junior year, home economics – the class you took because you thought it was going to be full of girls? The class you made me take with you because all of the other guys thought it was for 'pussies'?" she giggled.

His eyes widened as it slowly came back to him. "Oh, yeah, we had to make an original meal and no one else wanted to be my partner because I almost set that other girl's hair on fire…"

"Mmhm! And obviously I had to be stuck with you because I was the only girl in class who had short enough hair to be deemed fire safe around you."

"It was an accident!" Jesse defended, picking up a few boxes of cereal.

"Oh, yeah, accidentally in class after school 'working on a project' in the home-ec class and accidentally leaning the girl over the stove – yes, Jesse, everyone believed that," Felicity shot, snickering.

Jesse rolled his eyes and continued down the aisle.

"But yeah, I remember Funyun chicken, shit… I'm pretty sure that was all I ate for the rest of junior year. Damn, it's been a while…" he mumbled. "Your hair is long now."

"Hm? You're just noticing that now?" Felicity questioned, slightly amused.

"Well, no, I'm just saying," he shrugged, "It looks good on you."

Felicity let out a small laugh. And out of nowhere, they were eighteen again.

Nothing had changed.