Audrey took the test four times and then she called James.
Nathan was typically the one good at romantic gestures. She'd come back from the courthouse after changing her name to find "I love you Mrs. Wuornos" spelled out in cupcakes all across the kitchen counter. (Her car may have been filled with the most comfortable bedding she could find, but that was a spur of the moment purchase that hadn't required nearly as much forethought as his confectionary declaration.) It was a trend that continued through their first year of marriage. Sometimes it was as simple as leaving lilies on her desk at work so she would find them when she started her morning, and sometimes it was a treasure hunt on their six month anniversary that left her solving clues all across town.
She loved that he was thoughtful and meticulous and yes – even sappy. He never expected that of her. Swore up and down that her presence was enough for him, and she believed it. He'd never been a very convincing liar.
But for once she wanted to surprise him. So she spent a few months stewing over the details, and when she was ready she called James.
They spent the morning at the hardware store. James picked out everything she needed and drove it to her house. They went out for lunch, careful to keep all conversation away from the matter at hand so the town rumor mills wouldn't find out before Nathan did. When he said goodbye he was practically vibrating with excitement on her behalf.
She spent the afternoon in the kitchen. Nathan still did most of the cooking, but she'd picked up a few tricks now that she had time for such domestics. A special day required a special meal. She'd discarded the obvious choice right away. His pancakes were far better than hers, and news like this required a more grown up menu. She'd found a recipe for chicken parm that seemed manageable and delicious. There was something surprisingly soothing about following the directions that helped her understand why he was so fond of the process. Her mind wandered as the food cooked, her hand drifting occasionally to rest on her stomach as she hummed a tune under her breath.
It had been a fantastic fourteen months. They'd had some space issues to work out, and it hadn't been completely easy for her to adjust to a post-Trouble Haven. With the Troubles gone some of his memories of Max had come back, and she had plenty of demons of her own to cope with from her multiple pasts. There were rough patches, bad days, and nights filled with Patsy and Jack. But she loved coming home with him, whether it was for a torrid night of lovemaking or a rousing game of Life. His joy was infectious, and even when she wanted to be annoyed it was nearly impossible to maintain any negative emotions when he was beaming at her. The sex had become less constant and desperate, but he still knew how to drive her wild. She'd never had another lover who could switch between tender and passionate so effortlessly. Even as the other side effects of his Trouble faded – his posture becoming more relaxed, his actions less regulated – he always seemed a bit more alive when she was touching him.
And he'd literally bound her to this life when otherwise she'd been destined to become another person, so it made sense that she felt most real when she was by his side.
She had just put the garlic bread in the oven when she heard the front door open.
"Honey," he called. She'd gotten used to the pet name, as long as it was in private and never at work. His voice softened whenever he said it, and she'd never admit it to another soul but it made her want to belong to him. She could hear him moving through the house, making the short trek from the entryway to the kitchen. "Why is there a pile of wood on the porch?"
She turned and wiped her hands on her jeans. He came forward and pressed a quick kiss to her cheek. "That smells delicious by the way," he said, peering over her shoulder to look through the oven door.
She'd practiced the way she would say it, cavalier and disarming, like it was no big thing. But she felt her nerves in her stomach and her heart pounding in her ears and it sounded like her voice was trembling when she told him, "James says it's everything you'll need to build a crib."
She managed to keep a straight face for a few seconds as she watched him, and she could tell he was thrown by this.
He swallowed, wide eyes blinking as he stared at her stomach. "You're pregnant?" he croaked.
"Yeah." And finally she let the joy she'd felt since this morning shine through. Her nervousness evaporated, leaving a breathless giddiness and a smile so wide that it pulled on the corners of her mouth.
His answering grin was just as wide. "We're having a baby?"
"Yes," she said, laughing at his bright puppy dog eagerness and the prospect of this strange, beautiful, perfect, normal life laid out before them, a life Prudence had thought stolen from her and Audrey Parker had never expected to have.
He was laughing himself when he silenced them both with a kiss so thorough it left her clutching his arms to stay upright. He followed it with feather light kisses to her forehead, her nose, and her eyelids and she laughed at the way it tickled and how much she loved him.
"You're sure?" he whispered into her ear. She nodded, her chin bumping against his shoulder.
"I took the test four times just in case. I have a doctor's appointment on Thursday. I figured you'd want to come with me."
"Course." He pulled back slightly though he didn't loosen his grip on her waist. "I thought you were on the pill."
A year ago she might have worried about his intentions with such a question. But she'd spent quite a lot of time learning how his mind worked. He loved James – they both did. But he was a traditional guy from a traditional town, and she imagined he'd prefer if all his children weren't accidentally conceived.
She reached out to push his hair across his temple. He still leaned into the contact like she was his only port in a storm. "I stopped taking it on our anniversary. I know we haven't talked about kids in a while, but I figured this would be a good surprise."
He tilted his forehead against hers, closed his eyes, and breathed her in. "The best," he said reverently.
"Your swimmers sure don't waste any time, Wuornos."
She could feel his quiet chuckle rumble through them both. "James should have taught us that," he whispered. "'Sides, they have lots of practice."
"That they do," she practically giggled. Audrey Parker did not giggle, but Audrey Wuornos was growing increasingly familiar with such frivolity.
"So I'm supposed to build a crib, 'eh?"
She looked up at him. "James offered to help if you need it."
"How'd he take the news?" Nathan and James had been working on their relationship, and while it still wasn't as effortless as hers with James a mutual respect was building that warmed her heart to see. She loved watched her two boys together when they didn't realize she was spying. The similar mannerisms, the matching features, the confident manner Nathan adopted when he was teaching James something about growing up in the wilds of Maine.
"He's thrilled for us. I was afraid he'd be jealous. But he's really not. He offered to babysit whenever we need a break."
"Probably could figure out the crib on my own. But a second pair of hands would be nice."
"You should call him."
"I will. But first – may I?" He looked down at her stomach and she knew exactly what he was asking.
"I'd be shocked if you didn't, daddy," she told him, but the nerves were back in full force. This was another moment she'd been waiting for. How many times had she relived the way he'd acted when he'd seen Beatrice's babies? She'd been shocked at the time to see her normally serious partner turn into a bouncing, babbling tower of mush with an infant in his arms. But as they'd grown closer sometimes she dreamed of his simple, unashamed joy at innocent new life. Now she yearned to be the one to hand him that life and bask in the knowledge they'd created it together, rather than the one who scoffed and told him they had to get back to work.
His fingers twitched against her when she acknowledged his fatherhood, and then he dropped to his knees beside her. His hand was shaking when he gently lifted her shirt and laid his other palm across her still flat stomach.
"Hey baby." His voice was deep and quiet, and Audrey fisted her hands into his hair to keep her balance. His thumb moved almost imperceptibly up and down against her skin and her eyes fluttered closed at the sensation. "Your mommy and daddy are so excited to meet you soon. You are going to be so smart and so beautiful. Or handsome. Yes you are. And we're gonna love you so, so much. We already do. So grow big and strong for us. And don't be too hard on your mommy. She gets grumpy when she doesn't feel well."
Audrey reached down and flicked his ear. She should have caught on sooner from the playful tone that had crept into his voice, but she'd been overcome by the moment.
"You better get used to it, Wuornos. As excited as I am about meeting this little guy I am not looking forward to the process."
"You'll do great," he said lightly, and then he pressed a chaste kiss to her stomach. Before she recovered from his actions he scooped her into his arms. Her hands came around his neck automatically. "Where are we going?"
"Bedroom," he said like it was obvious, and she supposed that it was. She might have given in if the oven timer hadn't sounded.
"Wait," she demanded, hardly believing herself. "Hold that thought. But put me down."
He kissed the side of her neck and started working downwards. "It's okay if we burn the house down. We're building another one anyway."
"Nathan." She tried to make it a warning, but his lips found a sweet spot and made her inflect his name with the wrong kind of desperation.
"Okay, we can turn the oven off first." He took a step in that direction and she used his distraction to her advantage, pushing on his chest.
"I mean it. Put me down."
Their eyes locked, and once he realized she was serious he complied immediately. But he looked like a kicked puppy when he stepped away from her.
"Don't give me those sad eyes," she said, turning toward the oven so she wouldn't have to witness his disappointment. "I've been cooking all afternoon. Heaven knows that soon I'm not going to want to do that. We are not ruining this meal because we can't wait half an hour to fall into bed with each other."
In the reflection of the oven she could see him dutifully take his seat at the table. He smiled softly as he watched her pull the food from the oven. Satisfied he wasn't actually upset, she revealed her final surprise.
His pouty face was back as soon as she turned, but it melted into delighted shock as she flashed him a wicked grin. "Besides, I bought us a bottle of maple syrup for dessert."