The Diego Diaries: Shadow Box 40 edited for boo-boos :D
-0-At Maccadam's Old Oil House
"My glass is empty." Prowl looked for the waiter and waved him over. It was the same waiter from the last time they decided to get shit faced together. He paused and grinned. "Keep them coming," Prowl slurred with a grin.
Ratchet snickered. "Do, youngling. We haven't been arrested in a while."
He snorted and grinned. "Okay." He turned to make it so.
"What do you think of the talent in this room, Prowler?"
Prowl glanced around. "I don't know very many of the mechs in here. I suppose there are a number of professions represented. I am sure there are many competent individuals."
Ratchet glanced at Prowl, then burst into laughter. A few of the mechs at tables turned to look. "I don't mean 'talent', Prowler," Ratchet said leaning in closer. Prowl leaned toward him as well. "I am asking you … if you could frag anyone in this room, who would it be? What do you think about the 'talent', doofus?"
Prowl did the math and concluded that he was indeed a doofus but that it peeved him that Ratchet said so. "Oh." He sat back giving Ratchet a glacial optic as he considered the 'talent' in the room. "Well, I think those two by the door are rather intriguing. They don't touch Optimus but they aren't bad."
Ratchet looked at the two by the door and smirked. "Which one would you do if we decided to do a twofer?"
After a moment of rumbling through the Urban Dictionary, Prowl looked at Ratchet. "I don't think I would choose the first *Mrs. Optimus Prime*," he said with a slight irritation. "But the other one is cute."
Drift and Springer grinned at the two as they stood at the bar. Springer raised a glass to Ratchet who returned the gesture. "We've been made," Springer said.
"Don't make eye contact," Drift said with a smirk.
They chuckled and found a table near the door, settling back for the evening. As they did, Sam Witwicky and Jessie Landon swung in and paused long enough to find their quarry. With a rev of the segway, they headed off to where Prowl and Ratchet sat drinking.
:Hey! Ratchet and Prowl!: Jessie said. They stopped by the table and looked way the hell and gone upward. Two increasingly snockered bots looked down at them with a grin. :What's this I hear about you being sparked again, Ratchet?:
:You heard right: Prowl said. :The slagger is:
:What about you, Prowl? Isn't it about time?: Sam asked like a dumb ass.
Prowl looked at him a moment, then Ratchet. :Tell me again why we can't step on them:
:Ah, Prowler: Ratchet said with mock sympathy. He looked down at the humans. :Com me tomorrow, Jessie. I'm getting slag faced right now:
:I am holding you to it, Ratchet: Jessie said. She tapped Sam and the two turned heading off into the night.
"Those two are cute," Ratchet said watching them go.
"They are. Too small," Prowl said.
"I'm taller than you." Ratchet grinned as more drinks were delivered and glasses taken away.
"It's not the size of the package, Ratchet. It's the ..." Prowl paused to think. He thought a moment. "The package doesn't matter. Consider my Osimus."
"Osimus?" Ratchet asked as his final lucid moment receded into the distance.
"Yeah," Prowl said as he took a swig of another drink. "My Osimus is a big mech. He's the biggest mech I know."
"Bigger than Sentinel?" Ratchet asked as he thought about Ironhide who was a big mech too. "Bigger than my old mech?" Of course, Osimus was but Ratchet wasn't tracking too well after seven or eight drinks. Prowl was farther behind but had a lower tolerance than a medical vehicle.
"Ironhide is big. But Osimus is bigger," Prowl managed. He sipped his drink and settled back looking around the room. "He's the biggest mech in the city. Even that slagger Sentinel is smaller."
"I wouldn't know," Ratchet said with a softly vented sigh. "My old mech is one fine specimen. Sentinel on the other servo is a slagger."
They chatted and chugged, relaxing on their chairs by the window. Around them, the room pulsed with music, drinking and laughter. It was a mellow crowd in the room. As they sat by the window drinking, nearby Springer got a call. He glanced at Drift. "Those youngling high caste slaggers are at it again. There's a fight at the park in Metroplex. They want us there because their genitors are showing up. It could get out of hand."
"What about those two?" Drift said nodding toward Ratchet and Prowl.
"They seem to be parked. We'll hurry. I called for back up," Springer said as he drained his drink and stood up. They two turned and walked out the door to a free-for-all in the park with genitors on the side.
Prowl watched them go, then looked at Ratchet. "Did I tell you that Sentinel was fragging with Sunstreaker when he and Sideswipe were on duty at the prison?"
"No."
"He did. Bluestreak told me. I changed the schedule to get them out of there. I am not a happy mech, Ratchet."
"I can see that. Fragger."
"Who, me?" Prowl asked, his glass pausing before his lips.
"No. Sentinel. He's the slagger. You're my best friend."
They looked at each other with tearful optics.
"That Sentinel is a slagger. He's a fragger, Ratchet. He two-timed me. He was trying to frag Sunny when he was fragging me. What a total fragger," Prowl said with feeling.
"He is. He was playing you, Prowler. He was using your spark like a trampoline," Ratchet said with a drunk's exaggerated outrage.
"He was. I didn't get to talk about that last time. I was going to tell him what a sorry frag he was compared to Osimus," Prowl said angrily.
"You should," Ratchet said hotly. The idea of a fragger trying to frag his youngling while fragging with his BFF was a bit hard to swallow even for a medical vehicle.
Prowl considered that, then stood unsteadily. "Come on." With that, he turned and walked to the door and beyond.
Ratchet watched him, then stood and followed in a relatively straight line. They disappeared into the mall and beyond.
-0-Nearby at a near riot
Springer stood with the necks of two younglings in servo. Around him yelling and shouting, a dozen younglings were held apart by a line of Night Watch officers who had come to the alarm. A family sitting in the park having a nice evening were enveloped by a group of youngling mechs who had come together on the street beyond. They had been pushed back when the fighting reached them and had put out the call.
Drift decked a raging genitor who had come to the park to join the melee. The mech toppled over and the crowd stopped, all of them shocked that the former Governor-General of Altihex was laid out on the ground.
"Well, that was fast," Springer said dragging his younglings behind him as he stepped into the middle of the crowd. "YOU ARE ALL UNDER ARREST!"
The melee and its battling was over.
-0-Several moments later
"I don't see them."
"Neither do I."
"Optimus is going to be pissed."
"Not at the ex-missus," Springer said with a grin. They both turned and headed out to find the two drunks who outranked both of them, wherever they were.
-0-On the street
They passed the Fortress on their way to the prison. As they walked, Prowl remembered a thing he was supposed to do. He mulled the fuzzy haze of his mind and then remembered. He made the call and they continued.
-0-At the apartment of the callee
"I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, Ali?" Blackjack asked as he looked up from the data that he, Alor and Flint had been working on as Hero slept on the couch nearby.
"I made Prowl promise to call me if he and Ratchet were going to be arrested," Alor said with a grin.
"It's going to happen?" Flint asked with a chuckle.
"Apparently," Alor said as he paused by the couch. Leaning down, he kissed Hero. "You might take her home, 'Jack. Your son is probably having a terrible evening." With that, Alor of Iacon and Praxus walked out the door to join the fun.
Flint looked at the door, then Blackjack. "Want to take Hero to Ironhide, then go see what's what?"
Blackjack considered that, then nodded. "Sounds like fun."
And they did.
-0-At the Prison
"Let's not go there," Prowl said nodding to the gate where the night crew were working. The Guard Center on the rise nearby was lit up and the city beyond along with the distant lights of Terra and Aerie Hill made the view beautiful and welcoming. "Let's sneak around the back. His barracks are over there. Slagger. He needs to be hung upside down in a meat locker."
Ratchet snorted, then laughed. "That's a nice picture."
"Thank you, Ratchet," Prowl said looking at his tipsy partner. "You know, Ratchet, I never did slag like this before you. I was always so proper and by the book."
"I noticed. I'm a bad influence on you. You're slagging perfect, Prowler."
"No, you're a good influence. I bonded with Osimus because of you. I have a family. You listen to me and you always saw what I could be underneath the facade."
"I did," Ratchet said nodding. "You were fun. I don't think you knew that."
"I don't think I did either. You're my best friend. Besides Osimus. You know that," he said to both Ratchets who stood swaying beside him with a maudlin expression on both their faces.
"I do," Ratchet said. "You're mine. You're a good mech, Prowler. You deserve the best."
"I have it. Good old Osimus," he said with a teary tone to his voice. "I think I need to tell old Sentinel what a fragger he is, the two-timing slagger."
"Come on. Let's reconn," Ratchet said as he staggered toward the far end of the security zone that was the Autobot Military Prison of Mars.
-0-On the streets
Drift and Springer caught up with Alor as he rounded the corner of Tower Road and Fortress Highway. They paused. "Hi, Alor. Where are you going? Something happening at Ops Center?"
"Nope," Alor said with a grin. "I got the word from Prowl that he and Ratchet are going to probably be arrested and I'm tracking them."
"Oh frag," Springer said with a grin. "We were supposed to keep them out of the brig. Where are they going? To the prison?"
"It would seem so," Alor said as the three turned to head in that direction. They disappeared into the darkness together.
-0-On the road as well
They walked out of their tower, the three of them heading for the prison together. They reached the corner of Tower Road and Fortress. Flint glanced at Blackjack. "Ratchet hasn't changed a bit."
"No," Blackjack said with a grin. "He's as wild aft as he ever was."
Optimus grinned in spite of himself. "I won't argue with that."
They disappeared into the darkness as they headed swiftly to the prison down the road beyond.
-0-TBC For Pip
2013 (2)