Chapter 29: Snowdrop

Like a thick, cold blanket of glittering snow, silence lay spread over the breakfast table. It wasn't a hostile quietude, not even a careless one. It was just the absence of conversation caused by a group of people absorbed in their own worlds. The emotions displayed on quiet features varied widely. It ranged from confusion to pain and from giddy happiness to relief. Most had in common only their blurry eyes and stifled yawns, while they stirred their teas cold and chewed on their slices of toast without tasting them. Sleep didn't appear to have come easily to anyone in the gone night. Jack had been watching his father's face for several minutes, pretending to drink his coffee. John's features seemed to have softened overnight and even though he also appeared a little too enthralled in his breakfast, he took the time to glance up at his son and show the idea of a smile on his lips. The Inspector was satisfied with that and let his eyes wander further down the table, to where his cousins sat. Iris and Hazel were actually eating and while both of them didn't look like they had gotten much sleep, they exuded a quiet happiness. In difference to Mac who had, probably in an attempt to hide herself away, moved between Olivia and Laura. The doctor was watching her lover with soft, thoughtful eyes and Jack's heart ached at the idea what hells were waiting on those two simply for taking a chance at love. He remembered when Phryne had expressed her opinion on "sodomy" very clearly to his face the first time. For a moment he had been offended for her questioning the laws he lived by. Then it had occurred to him, that he whole-heartedly agreed with her. He could not see the point in punishing people for who they were drawn to, be it gender, race or social status. Jack glanced at Phryne, who with precision spread strawberry-jam onto a piece of toast at present. If his fate would be prison for loving her, would he be able to stay away, he wondered?

He had battled his attraction, his feelings for so long, trying to protect his heart from being broken yet again and still he hadn't managed to resist, when life had thrown him the chance to be loved by her in return. And God knew, he did not regret a moment. His heart beat faster at the idea that he would share a lifetime with Phryne. It was unreal, but breathtakingly beautiful.

The Inspector realised that he was being watched. Jane seemed strangely absent, despite her big blue eyes being glued to him. Jack's conversation with his fiancée had reminded him yet again, how precious the wedding gift was that she brought into their marriage. A daughter that he had never thought he'd have. And not just any girl, but a pretty, clever and kind one. Right now, the expression on Jane's features worried him and the part of Jack that had started to turn into a father, ached to talk to her and find out what was bothering her.

A tipped over tea cup distracted him from his thoughts. Laura patted at the wet spot with her napkin, while the little boy on her lap seemed to find the whole situation rather funny. She looked close to tears, Jack found and the feeling of guilt returned. He remembered only too well the letter that Fred had hidden. Had he had an affair with Miss Spencer? And if yes, did Laura know about it? It would explain her appearance. He probably should talk to Fred in quiet. Jack made a mental note to drag him aside for an interview later on, but a glance at his watch reminded him that he didn't have time for that right now. They still needed to go see the Vicar and Constable Collins would be at the station at 11.30, hopefully with some helpful information in his luggage. And he also needed to break his wedding plans to the family, most of all his Uncle and Aunt; he could hardly get married on their grounds without their consent. But the present didn't seem the right time at all. Jack drained his cup, wondering if it would be better to postpone the information, when he heard a whispered conversation between his brother and his wife. It regarded the time tables of trains.

"You aren't intending to leave early, Will?" he asked loudly, shaking numerous people out of their reverie. His brother cleared his throat.

"We were considering it, as it is the birthday of Wendy's mother on the weekend," Will Robinson explained. Wendy looked embarrassed. Jack chewed on his lip.

"Would it be terribly inconvenient, if you were to stay longer?"

Will cocked an eyebrow at his big brother, while the rest of the group followed the exchange with curiosity.

"If you wanted to catch up some more, we can always do that in Melbourne, Jack."

The Inspector smiled wryly.

"That is of course true. But as things stand, I'm afraid, I might need a best man – very soon."

Silence had been lying over the table like untouched snow till moments ago. Now many feet stomped over the crisp, glittering surface, as all hell broke lose.

X

He was ill or at least that was, what he was trying to convince himself of. Because Tobias Butler did not stay in bed past noon with his covers pulled over his head, unless he was suffering of at least a serious cold. He did feel terrible too, but the runny nose was missing. Instead, his chest ached. He turned under his duvet, trying to get warm, but in vain. As if Riya had taken the warmth with her when she'd left.

Mr. Butler had been alright yesterday. He had returned to the house, prepared himself some dinner and then settled in his bedroom with a book. He had been absorbed in his novel and almost asleep by the time the first people had returned from Wombat hall.

He had been alright - till in the middle of the night faint laughter had woken him. Seemingly his Mistress had stumbled up the stairs on her way home and the Inspector had had to catch her. They both seemed giddy with happiness and even though he did not know the reason for this, Mr. B had tried his hardest to be glad for them. It hadn't worked.

Crying really wasn't a habit that Tobias Butler had ever gotten into. Not even after his wife had passed away. But at the present it seemed an awfully tempting option. Instead however, he threw the sheets back and climbed out of bed, ignoring his aching limbs and the goosebumps on his skin. He was a grown man. Surely he could deal with a bit of heartache. A fair bit of heartache, admittedly. He slung his morning gown around himself and stepped outside into the corridor, grateful that his Mistress had long since left for Wombat Hall. He didn't particularly care to explain his current state to her or anyone else. Just when he tried to enter the bathroom, a female shadow swept past him. It looked faintly like Dorothy.

"Sorry, I need to..." She didn't get any further, before he heard the sound of retching through the open door. Mr. Butler nodded to himself. He had made a decision. Now he might as well stick to it.

X

A light breeze carried over the smell of the lake when Detective-Inspector Robinson stepped out into the blinding sunlight. His watch reminded him pointedly that they really needed to leave if they wanted to squeeze in the talk with the Vicar before heading to the station. But Phryne was currently caught in a crossfire of wedding planning between Esmeralda and her Aunt and he was not going to try and get involved in this. Men making this mistake, could only get themselves a bloody nose.

So instead of getting something done, he aimlessly wandered through the garden in front of the Hall. He didn't see her until he had almost reached the small brick wall, she sat on with dangling legs. Jane still looked like she was absorbed in another world and Jack wondered for a moment if it was intrusive of him to even approach her, but he felt he needed to talk to her and figure out if he could help her dissolve her worries.

"May I?"

She nodded and he slipped on the wall beside her, causing a small spider to scatter away. For a whole while they just sat together in silence, both waiting for the other one to open a conversation.

"Is the wedding worrying you?" the Inspector finally asked, deciding on bluntness.

Jane shook her head, still saying nothing. It was unusual for her to be this quiet and Jack was starting to get nervous.

"You cried, didn't you?" she finally asked. "You both did, before you came down this morning."

Jack gasped for air. He had not seen that one coming. But then, nobody had ever said that being a father was an easy task.

"You are right. We had an intense conversation this morning about marriage," he explained. "And about whether to have children."

Now Jane looked up at him in surprise.

"I don't think she wants children. I am quite certain, she didn't even want me to start with."

"I think she was just being a coward," Jack smiled. "She was in love with you after five minutes."

Jane shrugged grinning, her feet dangling against the wall.

"That is quite possible."

There was silence for a while and the Inspector kept wondering how to continue, when Jane spoke again.

"Are you going to have any? Children, I mean."

Jack didn't answer straight away.

"We have a daughter. That's enough." He glanced at Jane. "If you will have me, that is."

"That's not up to me. It's the law."

"By law I am only to be your guardian. But I would like to be your father. If you let me," he said quietly, finding that his hands were trembling in his lap, while he waited for her answer.

She looked at his face for a long time, searching for something.

"I'm not sure how that works. I never had one," she finally opted.

"We can learn together then. I never had a daughter before."

They sat together quietly on the small brick wall, blinking into the sun, pondering. Waiting. Finally Jane turned her head to Jack, a broad grin spreading over her face.

"Right, let's give this a shot. Tell me a secret that you haven't shared with anyone before."

The Inspector got over his surprise a mere second later, when something popped into his brain unannounced. Maybe it wasn't really a secret, only a thought he never had deepened too much and now it just felt silly. But a pair of big eyes continued to be glued to him and he didn't want to mess up his first appointment as a father already. And to be fair, it was probably the least traumatising secret he could come up with.

"Alright," he decided, "but only if you promise not to tell anyone."

X

A mere 30 minutes later the Honourable Phryne Fisher found herself rapping enthusiastically at the door of the Daylesford Vicarage. An elderly man with a crown of grey hair opened, a napkin stuck in his collar. When he spotted the lady in front of his door, he quickly pulled the telling piece of cloths from his garment.

"Vicar," Walter's voice boomed. "How good to see you."

Jack's Uncle had insisted on joining them, hoping to talk the spiritual leader around if there should be any trouble. The Vicar smiled thinly, obviously worried about the continuation of his lunch at this time.

"Mr. Cox-Stafford, what can I do for you?" he asked, looking at Phryne instead, who smiled at him as charming as she could currently manage after an half hour conversation about flower-arrangements.

"Oh, come on, Edward, we are still on a first name basis. We've known each other since school days."

"I'm sorry Walter, but I seem to have forgotten your name in all the times, you have not come to my church," the man grinned, showing them in. Phryne felt the reassuring hand of Jack in the small of her back while the priest led them into his kitchen, were a single plate with some sort of roast was sitting on a polished wooden table.

"I'm sorry we are interrupting your lunch," the Inspector said politely.

The Vicar waved absent-mindedly with his serviette and sat back down.

"There is no time like the present to find the way to the Lord. So what brings you here?"

"My nephew here wants to get married," Uncle Walter explained happily. "And I would like you to wed them."

The priest glanced at the serious faces of the couple.

"And I assume there is a catch to this offer, isn't there?"

"Two actually," Phryne smiled. Vicar Bailey sighed, starting to eat again, while they talked. When they had finished, he looked up from butchering a potato and hummed.

"I'm afraid, it's impossible," he said calmly.

Jack and Phryne shared a look. They had expected some complications, but not this.

"You can't be serious," Mr. Cox-Stafford intervened from the back.

"I am actually quite serious, Walter."

The old man laid down his knife and fork to look at the couple.

"I am not worried about marrying you in the gardens of Wombat Hall. While the church is of course the appropriate place for this, God is in every tree and every flower. I do not think it abdominal to leave the walls of a church to surround yourself with his creation for a ceremony like this. But you are already married, Inspector."

"I am divorced," Jack said stiffly.

"It is holy matrimony, Inspector. There is no divorce in the Anglican church."

Jack felt his hand wrap painfully tight around Phryne's. She hadn't said a word yet, but he could feel her disappointment. He cleared his throat.

"And there is nothing we can do?" he asked quietly. "My former wife already remarried. Surely I cannot be expected to be held to a matrimony that she does not honour anymore?"

The Vicar tipped his head in thought.

"This is ridiculous, Edward," Walter boomed.

Vicar Bailey sat upright, ignoring his old school friend and talking to the couple, who looked at him, their sweaty fingers tightly knotted together, disappointment written over their faces.

"I'm sorry, but this is how things are," he explained. "I do personally understand that human beings are flawed and that reality might not always match up to the ideals of my church. But my hands are bound."

"I find it is generally accepted to untie those hands with a generous donation to the church," Phryne cut in, smiling a winning smile. The Vicar gulped, thinking of the ramshackle staircase in the tower that asked for suicidal tendencies to dare and ring the bells.

"And I am a very generous woman," she prompted.

The Vicar patted his sweaty forehead with his big grey handkerchief.

"I also find, that the Lord looks kindly on his sinners, when they show mercy on the ones in need," he pressed out. "And therefore I would love to accept, Miss Fisher, but sadly, it is not in my power. You see, Bishop Gruner is a very strict believer in the holy matrimony between husband and wife and I would risk my position if I was to marry you. There is sadly nothing I can do. Nothing at all."

He went silent, looking at the way the couple was clutching onto each other, their hands sharing comfort that neither of them felt. Right now, he hated his superior with a passion. Edward Bailey had become a priest in the hope to bring God closer to humans and humans closer to God. Not to make lovers unhappy and break his neck in the clock tower. He saw Walter Cox-Stafford open his mouth and lifted his hands to stop him.

"And please, do not give into the temptation and attempt to bribe Bishop Gruner. He is as straight as an arrow they say, and just as deadly."

Walter closed his mouth, deflating.

Jack pulled himself to his feet, which seemed strangely wobbly, letting go of Miss Fisher's hand.

"We will have to try our luck down in Melbourne then," he said, his voice rough. "I'm sorry, Phryne."

His fiancée shook her head at him. She knew he would blame himself for not having had the insight 17 years ago, that he would want to marry the Honourable Phryne Fisher eventually. It was ridiculous.

"Thank you for your time," she said with a tense smile and stretched out her hand. The man of God took it hesitantly. He wasn't sure what he had expected. Maybe more anger. But instead there was just polite sadness and that made him hate his boundaries all the more. Surely it couldn't be in the will of the Heavenly Father to have his beloved children suffer. After the couple had left the kitchen, Walter turned around and mumbled something suitably rude. It made Vicar Bailey feel a little better.