The following Saturday Hermione showed up at the Manor in Harry's bedroom and said, "Get dressed. Why aren't you already at the Burrow? Didn't you get our invitation? We invited you over today weeks ago." Harry was lying on his side alone in bed reading. He put aside his wizarding comic book when he noticed Hermione's presence. Draco was already up and taking care of the children.
"I got it, but I ignored it. I'm too pregnant to move," Harry replied. He was in no mood to go anywhere, although he was no longer at the peak of his misery; that had occurred last month when he'd found it difficult to breathe, because the baby had been crushing his lungs. In the last week, the baby had moved down lower, no longer interfering with his breathing, which was an enormous relief. However, in moving down, the baby's head had moved into his pelvic region, which interfered with his ability to walk or move. It also meant the baby was absolutely crushing his bladder, which seemed to be able to hold no more than about a teaspoon these days. Luckily, he had finally convinced Narcissa to cast a short term urine vanishing charm on him every day. She'd already been in here this morning, which meant he didn't have to pee and wouldn't have to again until tomorrow morning. "And I am dressed."
"Honestly Harry, this is your surprise baby shower. Everyone is already there and waiting for you. I left my books, my notes, and my homework behind for you, and NEWTs are just around the corner."
"Well you should've planned it about four months ago, before I was too miserable to care. Go back to your NEWTs." Harry didn't think Hermione would be able to resist the chance to study more.
"We didn't know you weren't having one four months ago. If that's what you want to wear, fine, but you're going if I have to side along you myself. I'm not sacrificing my study time for nothing Harry."
"My husband will never agree to this. Draco!"
Draco heard Harry's call and came out of the nursery. "What's going on?" he asked.
"Hermione's trying to kidnap me for some silly baby shower. Tell her I'm not going."
"Draco, you and the boys are invited too. Come along, it'll be fun," Hermione said.
"Where is this shower?" Draco asked.
"The Burrow. Molly, Ginny, and I sent you an invitation weeks ago," Hermione answered.
"Alright, you can take Harry, but the boys are staying here," Draco replied.
"I want to stay too. You can go, but I don't want to move until this bloody baby gives me back my body," Harry complained.
"Don't talk about Lilac like that, Harry. You'll have to side along him Hermione; he won't be moved," Draco said. The last time Harry had been bathed he'd been levitated to the bathroom and deposited in the tub.
"Alright, fine. Let's go Harry," Hermione said taking Harry's arm. "Meet us there Draco."
"Will do," Draco said and went to find his parents to get them to watch the boys, before apparating to the Burrow.
When Draco arrived at the Burrow, Harry was reclining in an easy chair on the lawn surrounded by baby party decorations and a large number of witches. "Draco dear, over here," Molly called, motioning Draco over to where she was organizing the games near Harry.
When Draco reached Molly Weasley, she hugged him and said, "I'm so glad you came, Draco. I had hoped you'd bring the babies, but at least you're here."
"The boys are entirely too mobile now to take anywhere," Draco replied. Teddy had just started running two weeks ago and Scorp had just gotten his first medical grade walker. With the new walker holding Scorp up, he was finally mobile and causing just as much trouble as his brothers.
"I can assure you that I can handle three rambunctious toddlers. Although, Harry does seem to be extremely grumpy. He said we were four months too late for him to come. I would've thrown one months ago if I'd known you weren't going to have one, dear, but I was under the impression your family was throwing one for him. Andy told me you were having one in late March, so it wasn't until it didn't happen that we realized he needed one and I put this together," Molly said.
"Well with Harry unable to defend himself, we didn't think it was worth the risk. And we don't need any gifts, because we already have the Malfoy nursery set. Then there are enough toys and baby things from the three boys that we have everything we need," Draco explained. "But Aunt Andy, why did you think we were having one? No one ever said anything about it and we weren't planning one."
"You were all planning that surprise event, which turned out to just be Easter with the Malfoy family, but I'd thought it was Harry's baby shower," Andy lied. She'd known all along that no one was throwing Harry a baby shower, but she didn't think he should be having another baby so soon and she wasn't going to help anyone throw a party to celebrate.
"Draco, can I have a sleeping potion? You can wake me when this is over," Harry groused.
"Oh Harry, don't be like that. This is your big day!" Ginny exclaimed, fitting Harry with a silly party hat.
"Right," Harry said removing the hat. "If I knew where my wand was, I'd hex you right now, Ginny."
"Mum, we better start before Harry gets a hold of a wand," Ginny said.
"Oi Harry, you can use mine. I've been dying to get her back for that bat-boogey hex she hit me with that one time," Draco said, handing Harry his wand.
Harry hit Ginny with a tap-dancing curse, which signaled the start of the games. The most embarrassing game was when they guessed Harry's width and then measured him. He really couldn't believe he was about three times his pre-pregnancy width, but he was. In fact he was almost as big as Draco had been, even though Draco had been pregnant with twins and he was only carrying the one baby.
"What are you naming the baby, Harry?" Luna asked, coming up to Harry while everyone was playing baby bingo. Headmistress McGonagall had given her and Ginny special permission to leave the school for the weekend for this.
"Lilac Aiki Malfoy," Draco answered for Harry, having just marked off a B on his bingo card.
"Actually, I changed my mind," Harry said and Draco groaned.
"Harry, we're never going to agree on another name this late in the game. It was a miracle we agreed on that one," Draco protested, giving up on his bingo card. He barely understood the muggle game and he obviously wasn't going to win.
"Yeah, but Aiki sounds like a cross between a sneeze and the word icky," Harry replied.
"So what did you have in mind, Harry?" Luna asked.
"Lilac Koholā Malfoy. Koholā is the name of the whale shaped constellation. I like it better than Aiki. I don't need my daughter named after Sirius and Aiki just means a booby bird anyway."
"Kawalla?" Draco asked. Just because he loved Hawaii, didn't mean he could speak the language.
"Ko-ho-lā," Harry replied and Draco groaned.
"I swear Harry, this is the last kid, if for no other reason than the fact we can't agree on a name to save our lives. I can't believe you would even suggest naming our child after a whale."
"Well what did you have in mind?"
"If I'd known you didn't like Aiki anymore, I would've suggested Orphelia. It means wolf."
"Or-feel-ee-a? Ew."
"What do you mean Ew? It's a perfectly good name and at least it doesn't imply she's fat."
"If you are looking for a female name for Sirius, Harry, have you considered Isis?" Luna asked, calmly interjecting another name.
"What does Isis have to do with Sirius?" Harry asked. He liked the sound of the name; flowery, almost, like irises.
"The goddess has always been associated with the Dog Star," Luna replied.
"Lilac Isis Malfoy. What do you think, Draco?" Harry asked.
"Isis…It's better than Kahalla, that's for sure," Draco replied.
"Seriously Draco, would you want that to be our daughter's name or not?"
"It's alright," Draco started, but noticed the disappointed look on Harry's face. "Honestly Harry, the choice is up to you. I picked our sons' names and it's your turn to pick our daughter's."
"You mean it?"
"Yes, I do. I love you and I'm sure that whatever you decide will be lovely," Draco said, cupping his hand over Harry's cheek. He stroked the puffy skin there, before placing a tender kiss to Harry's lips; Harry's face was swollen from the pregnancy, but Draco still thought Harry was good looking.
When they broke apart, Harry said, "Good, then it's settled. I really like Isis."
After games was the food. Well during the games too Harry was eating, but after the games everyone ate. Then there was cake and ice cream, followed by the presents. Harry was interested in what he'd gotten, but he couldn't bend down to open the gifts up, so Draco did it for him and held everything up for Harry to see. Since there were almost as many people as had been to Teddy's baby shower, they got almost as many gifts.
They got a lot of girl clothes, which they actually needed. All of their baby clothes were neutral or for boys, so the heaps and piles of lacey dresses and girly clothes were appreciated. There were even onesies that said things like, "My Daddy is the Savior of the Wizarding World," and, "My Daddy is the Boy Who Lived." The onesie that said, "My Daddy Defeated the Dark Lord," was Draco's favorite, but Harry's favorite said, "Malfoy Princess."
In addition to the clothes, there were plenty of baby toiletries, such as nappies, soap, spoons, and everything in between, including a purple nappy bag to put it all in. Then there were a large number of items that they didn't need, because they already had three of them at home; these had flowery or lacey patterns in girly colors and included a new highchair, bouncer, walker, baby bathtub, and crib set. The other things they got were completely superfluous, such as another swing and jumper, when they had three swings and three jumpers at home, and a playpen, when they hadn't needed a playpen so far.
There was also the typical odd assortment of gifts from Draco's relatives, who Molly had invited. Since Scorp's unicorn blanket had been such a hit, The Craggy family got another one for Lilac. From the Vanity family there was a sweater and blanket set made out of puffskein wool. The Rosier family gave dress robes with matching shoes again, but also a soft silver occamy egg; Harry didn't know what he was expected to do with the egg. The Cornfoot family gave another protection bracelet with a shield charm. The Burke family gave an elegant silver tiara, which gave off a pleasant, happy aura and unlike the crowns the Burkes had given the twins, Harry thought he might actually let his daughter have this tiara.
From the Pucey family there was a set of a dozen empty memory balls, ready to preserve a moment with a simple spell. Mrs. Shafiq gave a silver baby brush and comb set. The Rowle family gave a collection of baby barrettes, hair ties, and head bands, all with intricate attachments and charms, such as the headband with a blooming rose and the barrette with a pair of flying, twirling, buzzing bees. The Smith family gave a set of very old silver and diamond earrings, even though it was far too soon to think about piercing an unborn baby's ears. The Crabbe family, having heard that the baby was to be named Lilac, gave lilac themed room decorations, including a painting. Mrs. Lestrange gave a very old elegant hair comb and a scepter topped with a large diamond, since Lilac was to be born in April.
Draco, Hermione, and Luna were just gathering up all of the gifts when Harry felt a pain in his distended abdomen. "Ow!" Harry exclaimed.
"What is it? Are you okay, Harry?" Draco asked.
"Sharp pain. I think I might be in labor," Harry said in between gritted teeth. The pain was passing, but it had hurt really badly. He hoped he was in labor, because that would mean his misery would end soon.
"Do you have the second cervix?" Draco asked.
Harry felt his belly, but he didn't feel anything. "No, I don't think so," he said. He didn't want to pull up his robes to make sure, because he wasn't wearing trousers underneath. He was far too fat to fit in any of his old trousers. He didn't even think they'd fit after he had the baby, because he'd put on a lot of weight with this pregnancy.
"He still might be going into labor, Draco; you should take him to St. Mungo's to get checked out," Hermione said.
"Nonsense dear. It's far too soon, even if he is in labor, to do anything about it. You should take him home and put him to bed. If he's going to be up all morning in labor, he might as well get some sleep while he can," Mrs. Weasley said.
"I like Molly's suggestion. Knock me out please and wake me up when it's over," Harry said, no longer in pain.
"Alright, I'm taking you home, Harry. Hermione, can you see to the presents?" Draco asked.
Hermione agreed and Draco side along apparated Harry back to their bed. Hermione sent gift after gift through the floo into the sitting room and Draco ignored it all, in favor of tending to Harry. Draco levitated Harry into the bath, so that he could soak in the nice warm water.
"Is Harry alright? Hermione just came through the floo and said he might be going into labor," Narcissa said, coming into the loo.
"He's fine. There's no second cervix," Draco said.
"Good, then it isn't time yet," Narcissa confirmed. Generally with Peverell pregnancies, they waited until after the second cervix had appeared and started dilating before going to the hospital. With Draco's pregnancy they had had to use a spell to determine when Draco was going into labor, because the second cervix was already there from the near miscarriage.
"Where are the boys?" Draco asked.
"Your father is watching them. He's just doing the nappy changes and cleaning them up for naptime," Narcissa answered.
"You should go help him. Harry and I are fine," Draco said, not wanting his mother to see his husband's bits.
As it turned out, Harry didn't go into labor that day. It wasn't until three days later on Tuesday April thirteenth nineteen ninety-nine that he went into labor and was taken to St. Mungo's, where he gave birth to Lilac Isis. She weighed in at a whopping eight pounds, fifteen ounces. She had a few wisps of black hair, but was otherwise bald. Her eyes when she was born were as light as Draco's and she looked like Narcissa, definitely taking after the Black side of the family. Harry saw Sirius in the shape of his baby's eyes, chin, cheeks, and forehead. Draco had never met Sirius, so he just saw his mother and Grandfather Cygnus in Lilac's features.
Harry liked that he was finally able to hold his daughter and he was relieved that he didn't have to pee every five minutes now that Lilac was no longer crushing his bladder. But he was not at all happy, although he couldn't figure out why he wasn't happy or why he started crying. He was just so tired and worn out from the birth, but he couldn't get to sleep and his hormones were way off. He'd handed Lilac off to Draco and closed his eyes to get some rest, but two hours later he was still awake and Lilac was crying to be fed. He had never noticed it before, but now he couldn't stand the sound of a newborn's cry.
Draco helped Harry get Lilac to latch onto Harry's elongated nipples. His nipples had been slowly transforming into teats over the past few months.
Lilac sucked for a few minutes and then fell asleep. Harry took the baby off of his nipple, but when he did, she woke up and started crying again. This time Draco helped Lilac latch onto Harry's other nipple and showed him how to stroke Lilac's cheek, so that the baby would stay awake and finish eating. But again when Harry removed the baby she woke up and cried. At this point Nurse McCalman came in and made sure Lilac was latched on correctly, which she was, and then checked Harry's chest, to make sure he was producing colostrum.
Harry turned out to be the problem, because both of his breasts were bone dry. It was too soon for him to be making milk, but his chest should've been full of the clear fluid called colostrum and it wasn't. Absolutely nothing came out when his nipples were squeezed.
"We can give your baby some donor milk for now. There are some witches who have just stopped nursing their own babies who donate breast milk to the hospital. I'll go get a bottle of it," nurse McCalman said.
"No, there's no need. I can feed Lilac," Draco said, taking the baby from Harry.
"Draco's still breast feeding our three boys," Harry explained as Draco did what he could not and nursed their baby.
Harry looked with awe at Draco feeding his baby and experienced a weird clenching sensation in his chest as his heart soared. His husband was giving life-nourishing fluid to their daughter, something he was supposed to be doing, but couldn't. It was a beautiful sight and while watching it, he came to realize that this is what being married was about. This is what love is: having each other's back, being on the same wavelength, and caring about the other so much that you want what they want, just because you want to see them happy. It was bringing a child into the world together to share, loving their child, and making sure that she had everything needed to thrive.
Love wasn't about sex, lust, and desire, which were all things they still had; yes, those things helped, especially in the beginning when that was all their relationship was to Harry. But now that he knew stronger, deeper feelings were possible, he wondered if Draco had felt them all along; ever since Draco had first said those three words back. Draco had been reluctant to say them, insisting that he wanted to be sure he felt them before saying them, which now made Harry think that Draco had known all along about these deeper feelings and had been feeling them since their engagement.
Harry was just beginning to feel real love now and it made him feel like an utter cad, plunging his emotional rollercoaster back down. Draco had felt it for two years already and had waited to say it until he meant it. Harry had been saying it all this time, without meaning it until today. He hadn't meant to lie or to deceive his husband, but he just hadn't known what true love was; how could he, after growing up with the Dursleys? Draco deserved better.
"I love you," Harry said thickly, reaching out to stroke Draco's arm and then cheek. He hadn't realized he was crying until now, the mucus in his throat making his speech sound thick.
Draco kept one arm cradling their daughter and with the other, reached out to wipe the tears from under Harry's eyes. "I love you too. Why are you crying? It's going to be okay; I don't mind feeding Lilac for you." His voice was gentle and tender and Harry could feel the love in it.
"I feel…" Harry began, but didn't know how to ask what he wanted to know.
"Yes, Harry? I know your emotions are going crazy right now. They are always out of whack after having a baby."
"No Draco, this is more. I feel this deep, overarching love for you that I didn't feel before. It's stronger and more powerful than what I felt before. Do you feel that too?"
Draco closed his eyes and tried to mask the disappointment on his face, because that wasn't something Harry needed to see. He'd thought Harry had felt it all along too. "Since before I told you I love you too."
At that, Harry pulled back and began to sob, his tears coming down thick and fast.
"Harry?" Draco asked concerned, opening his eyes. His disappointment was masked now, he was sure of it. "Harry look at me."
Harry looked up, through his bleary eyes and tear flecked glasses and met Draco's intense gaze. There was nothing but love on his husband's face.
"I love you," Draco continued. "My love for you is deep and everlasting. It doesn't matter if it took you a little longer to feel what I feel, as long as you feel it now. Besides, I had help."
"You did?" Harry asked.
"Yes, being pregnant with your children heightened my emotions. Pregnancy is a very emotional time and it's almost impossible to go through it without coming to love your partner in the end."
"I should've loved you since you were pregnant with the twins."
"But you weren't around. I had to go into hiding and you had other things on your plate; more important things. You had to save the world, so that we'd be safe." Harry didn't look at all convinced by this, so Draco continued. "No, Harry, you have to see how important your contribution was. It doesn't much matter that you didn't feel everything right away, because you acted like you did. You provided for us and made sure we were safe. That's what you would've done if you'd really loved me and that's what you did. And you love me now, which is what's important. We have the rest of our lives for you to love me and make it up to me."
"And for you to love me too?" Harry asked shyly, the tears momentarily held at bay by Draco's speech.
"Yes. Come here." Draco beckoned Harry closer with his free hand. Harry leaned in over their suckling daughter and Draco closed the remaining distance, pressing his lips to Harry's. The kiss was chaste, but passionate, the two lovers molding their lips together in an expressing of their love.
Author's Note: Was the ending a bit of a surprise? I know Harry has been saying those three words all this time, but he said them too fast and never described experiencing the sort of deeper feelings Draco did. There were about a dozen reviews commenting that it wasn't fair to Harry that Draco didn't love him back right away. Each time I almost gave it away that Harry doesn't actually love Draco yet and that it was just lust, but hopefully I managed to keep quiet and surprise you.
I'm debating if I should leave it here or write in a bit of Harry's post-partum depression. There are still a number of loose ends to tie up: reconciling with Ron, Draco's NEWTS, meeting the Crabbe's, Teddy's first birthday, and Lilacs accidental magic. I could put them in an epilogue or write a half dozen or so more chapters. What do you think? If I don't hear from you, I'll assume you want me to leave it here and just write an epilogue.
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