This is late. Really late. And I'm sorry. I had it done about a week ago, I really did, I wanted to proof read it a few days later though, but then my laptop committed suicide and went to the 'blue screen of death'. Long story short, had to rewrite it on my home computer, which everyone uses so I don't actually get a whole lot of time to work on it, anyways, can't even unlock my laptop to try and salvage the one I wrote beforehand. Anyway, thanks for all the feedback and support on this story though it means a lot, also, who else is loving Brandon Routh as Ray Palmer?

I sit there looking down blankly at my coffee. Suddenly I don't want it anymore. Oliver wasn't acting like Oliver. Well, that wasn't my Oliver, not the hero, not the friend. That was Laurel's Oliver. That was Ollie, the asshole, the cheat, that was the boy before the island, not the man after.

I knew the difference.

This, this very reason is why I stopped expecting things from people. Having high expectations only leads to disappointments.

I knew that, too.

So maybe that's why I slept with Mr. Palmer. I didn't expect a relationship. I hadn't expected much of anything. And I certainly hadn't been disappointed with the outcome.

That and I'm so sick of setting my love life on a constant standby waiting for Oliver.

And that hurt, too. It hurt a lot because he had changed. I thought he had changed. Or maybe I just kept telling myself that lie over and over until I believed it.

Why the hell was my life so complicated? Because stupid Oliver Queen walked into your office with a bullshit excuse and a laptop with bullet holes, and you still helped him. I mentally scold myself and my constant need to fix people.

I should stick to fixing computers; I'm obviously not all that great at putting broken people back together.

I stand and head for the kitchen to pour my coffee down the drain.

I wanted so badly to call Mr. Palmer and make him fuck me into oblivion, to make my mind stop finding its way back to Oliver and all my problems. But I realized that although I enjoyed Fifty Shades of Grey, I certainly did not intend on living it.

That… That actually wasn't true. I wanted that, I wanted Fifty Shades of Ray, I just didn't want the fallout. I didn't want to see that look on Diggle's face ever again.

But I don't know how those two things weighed out. I don't know what is more important, my happiness or who I hurt to get that happiness.

I rub my temples and lean against the counter. Maybe I need to sleep, get my mind off all of these damn men in my life.

I crawl into bed and stare at the not-dark-enough-to-sleep ceiling while my mind races with all these thoughts that consume me constantly. Eventually I drift off, very briefly before I wake up to loud knocks that could only come from an angry or desperate man. Oliver.

Reluctantly I roll out of bed, the knocking only intensifies when I approach the door which pisses me off to no end, I get it you're outside my door, shut the fuck up already.

I unlock the door and swing it open, "What the fuck is your deal Oliv- Mr. Palmer?"

But he doesn't talk, he just does. His fingers weave in my hair and pull my mouth to his, I don't want to stop him, I want him to keep going. But he doesn't.

"Can I trust you?" He whispers pulling his mouth from mine.

I laugh, "With the fact we sleep together? That's not something I really want to advertise on my resume."

I kiss him again but he pulls back and looks me in the eye, "I want to trust you."

I frown.

"Can I trust you, Felicity?"

"With what?"

"The Arrow trusts you with his secret and I want to trust you with mine."

I narrow my eyes at him.

"I'm smart, Felicity. I know you're an asset and that you like what you do with him, you like helping the people in this city."

I bit down on my lip, "Where exactly are you going with this?"

"Felicity, like I said, I'm smart, I know how you feel about Oliver," he pauses and takes in my expression that I couldn't mask in time, "And I know you're helping him with his crusade ," he pauses again and I know I've stiffened, but how could I not, he knows. He knows. "But I want you to help with mine."

My fists tighten at my sides, I want to punch him and his pretty face, "You slept with me so... what? You could steal me from my team?"

He sighs, "I thought that that was the only way I could get you to work for me. If I was willing to give you what he couldn't. Wouldn't." He corrects himself.

"No."

"Felicity, I need you."

"No. No," I shake my head frantically, "You cannot buy me, Mr. Palmer. You just can't." He prostituted himself so I'd join his team. Who the hell does that?

His eyebrows raise, "No, oh. I didn't mean it like that. That's not the only reason-"

"It doesn't matter! It was a reason, Mr. Palmer," I snap, wanting nothing more than to smack him upside the head. And then I realize it all at once, "You knew he was watching in the conference room, didn't you?"

"Yes." The calmness in his voice pisses me off to no end.

"You knew he'd freak out. You knew our team would fracture with our stupid fling!"

"Yes."

"I'm so blind." I say with a laugh "Of course you're the Atom."

"Yeah."

"I can't believe you!" I growl punching his chest.

"He doesn't value you, Felicity. He treats you like shit. He doesn't care about what you want. It's all about him. Him and his crusade. That is all he cares about. There isn't room for you in his life. No, let me rephrase that, he doesn't make room for you in him life. He has his priorities; evidently you're not one of his top. He pushes you. He pushes you so far away, but yet you still come back. Why is that?"

The weight of his words began to weigh me down. I knew all this already, this isn't news to me. He's just ripping the wound back open.

"Is it because you hope he's going to change?"

"It's because it's the one place I've felt at home in my whole life. They're my family and I can't lose that."

"And your family would want what's best for you. That's not going to be Oliver. He's just going to continue hurting you, continue playing with your emotions. He's destructive and I recommend getting out before he rips your world into a million pieces."

He already has, I almost say but stop myself. I feel the tears coming and I don't want Palmer to know I'm considering his proposal. "Please. Just go," I whisper keeping my gaze to the floor.

And just like Oliver, he does without a fight.

I think of Diggle telling me to move on. He's my brother, he wants me to be happy. And he knows I'm not going to be happy with Oliver.

Palmer was right.

A stranger saw it before I had.