ENTRY 12
WHEREVER YOU ARE

The first time I met her, she was sound asleep in my tent.

My own personal little squatter who, unbeknownst to me, harnessed all the light and color I'd been missing.

Something about her reminded me of a wild creature. Chestnut hair, messy and matted against the navy blue of my sleeping bag, covering the sheer beauty I would soon find on her face.

I won't pretend that the first time my heart hammered for her was out of love. Finding a stranger in your tent after a ten-mile hike would alarm anyone.

But then a graceful hand rustled against nylon and swept the hair from her eyes and showed me my entire world.

"Sleep well?" I asked, almost rendered speechless.

Cherry-stained lips turned up at the corners, chocolate eyes blinking away any sleep that lingered.

"Perfectly. It's a nice set-up you have." Her voice was like a song.

In barely over ten words, she planted herself in my life and never left.

And I never wanted her to.

Words flowed between us like water. Day turned to dusk, and soon night. A million stars older than time watched as we devoured every facet of each other.

It was an unspoken trade from words to something more when she slowly stood from beside the dying campfire, and if I knew about the inferno about to rage in the privacy of my tent, I may have been a little more hesitant.

Any lingering uncertainty vanished when her slick, devilish tongue chased the salt left behind from the muggy Tennessee summer and mine got lost between her legs.

I didn't even think to ask until the next morning, savoring the smell of bacon as she fried it over the fire.

"So, why were you in my tent to begin with?"

She curled up in my lap, one arm wrapped around my neck like she'd always belonged there, and nothing in me wanted to argue that.

Her eyes died the second the words tumbled from my lips. I didn't need her to tell me.

She was looking for a place to land. And I was a nest without a bird.

"Come home with me," I said, fearless.

I'd never been fearless, but this girl made me want to risk it all.

"Where's home?" she asked.

I hoped she didn't feel the way my heart clenched when she laid her head against my chest.

"Wherever you are."

I still mean it, forty-seven glorious years later.

Together we carried debt, grief, children, wrinkles, hospital stays, laughter, tears, hope, love, joy, and memories. My mind bursts at the seams with them all.

And now I carry them all by myself. But not for long.

I smile, my aching, brittle body settling into the same sleeping bag we first made love in.

My heart only has a few hammers left. My eyes drift shut. My breathing slows. And when I open them again, she's right there. Light and love and cherry and chocolate and sin.

My Bella.

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