Day 6: Worth It

If This Was a Movie

Soul continues pushing his way through the crowd that gathers on the dancefloor, his focus remaining on the girl ahead of him. He has a purpose for being here, and he'll do anything in his power to accomplish it.

A blur of blue flashes in the corner of his eye, and Soul almost falls to the ground as a hard body smashes into the side of him.

"Soul!" Black Star yells.

Soul prays that Maka isn't able to hear him over the techno music being played now. He doesn't want him being there to be ruined. It's supposed to be a surprise, dammit!

"What are you doing here? I thought Maka said you were gonna be stuck at school this weekend!"

"Would you shut the fuck up or quiet down?" he asks as he pushes his friend off him and throws a quick glance toward Maka. He thanks the heavens that she's still in deep conversation with Liz and Patti.

"Oh, I see. Maka doesn't know you're here, does she?"

"No, she doesn't. I was gonna surprise her."

Star's eyes twinkle as he smiles up at his friend. "You gonna tell her you love her?"

Does everyone know why he's back?

"Who told you that?"

"Dude," Star claps him on the back, "everyone knows! It's been fucking obvious since day one! You look at her like the sun rises and falls because of her! Everyone knows you're madly in love with Maka except for the girl in question."

Well, shit. He didn't think his feelings about her were that obvious.

"You're not gonna fuck this up for me, are you?" His friend always did have a bad habit of trying to be the center of attention. Whether it was scaling the side of the high school on the first day or ruining Kid's graduation speech by jumping off the stage.

But Black Star only smiles, and gives Soul a small push in Maka's direction. "Nah. Don't worry about me. Go ahead and get her."

A little dazed at his friend's kind words, Soul gives a small nod before walking back in the direction where Maka is.

Xx.

Since the moment they met, Soul and Maka had shared many firsts together.

The first time Soul had started school, Maka had traveled along with his parents even though she didn't have to. She was the one who had held his hand and led him to one of the tables where the other kids were, the one who had sparked a conversation with a girl neither of them knew. It had been Maka who made his first day special and helped him make new friends. Soul had repaid the favor once she started school, and even sat down with her before it was time for him to join his classroom.

When they were thirteen and twelve, Soul had been there for Maka when she endured her first heartbreak. He had been the one who helped soothe her, and reassured her that she was indeed worth it. That the guy who broke up with her was a complete idiot for ending things with her. There had been copious amounts of ice cream and chocolate involved and a shit ton of horror movies with the final girl trope that night. But all Soul remembered was the fact that his best friend was hurt and distraught and needed help.

Maka had even been there for him when he had his big piano concert that his parents had set up for him months in advance. It was her who had held his hand and reminded him that while others may hate his music, she was in love with it. He had walked on the stage, his nerves a raging mess, but she had remained standing on the sidelines. Her smile was small as he played. His eyes never left hers. He had performed for her and only for her.

She didn't owe him anything, and he didn't owe her anything. They were best friends who supported each other, and helped the other conquer their fears.

There had been many firsts they shared together, except for one.

They were sitting on his couch when she had asked him, her tone as casual as can be as they watched the couple in the movie do their thing. He probably wouldn't have thought anything of it or ventured further on the subject if it had been anyone else. He probably would have ignored the conversation entirely, gave some half-assed answer, and moved on in life. But this was his best friend. The girl he had had a crush on for far too long by now, and the question had stirred something inside of him.

"Have you had your first kiss before?" she asked, and Soul almost choked on the popcorn in his mouth.

After he cleared his throat with some water, he turned to his friend and gaped. "W-what?"

Maka hugged her legs closer to her, shrugged, and pink coated her cheeks. "I'm just curious if you've had your first kiss yet."

Soul blinked.

He wasn't entirely sure what to say. Of course he hadn't experienced his first kiss yet because he was holding out for the girl he had been madly in love with since he was fourteen. There had never really been anyone else who attracted him as much as she had. For him it had always been her or no one. Soul was ready to watch his best friend marry someone else, probably die alone, more than he was to kiss anyone who wasn't her.

But he wasn't ready for her to know that. Not yet, at least.

So he did what he did best. He lied.

Soul casually and cooly rid the shook from his face as he leaned back on the couch and ate some more popcorn. "Well, yeah. I had my first kiss ages ago. Who hasn't had their first kiss by their our age?"

Hopefully her!

"Who was it?" she asked. Maka tucked her legs beneath her as she turned to stare at him, an elation and sorrow in her gaze he wasn't quite able to understand.

"Uh, you wouldn't know her. She was some girl I had met back in school."

Soul's fingers tingled with the urge to scratch the back of his neck, but he had to control himself. Maka knew his tell for lying like the back of her hand. If he so much as touched his hair, she'd know he was bluffing and call him out on it. There was no way he was going to let her know that he hadn't been kissed yet.

"Oh," was all she said.

Her voice sounded small and hurt, and pain crossed his chest as her shoulders slumped down. She returned to her previous sitting position and snuggled up to him as if it were normal for friends to sit this close when they watched a movie. But it was, right? All friends sat like that, especially when they had known each other for so long and were comfortable amongst each other. It was normal, right?

Yeah. Of course it was. Why would it be any different for them? They had set the boundaries between each other, and friendship was as far as their relationship was ever going to go. At least, he believed they had set a boundary between each other. They had never really talked about it; he had only assumed they were just friends. Maybe there was a chance…

Soul rid himself of silly thoughts of being with his best friend like that. She didn't love him beyond the realms of friendship, and he shouldn't be getting his hopes up that she did. It was a hopeless pining, and he needed to rid himself of it before it fucked over his friendship with her.

But the same question she had asked him burned on the tip of his tongue as he aggressively took a bite out of a candy bar. His teeth mashed on the chocolatey bits, ripping it to shred, his tongue rolling it around in his mouth. Had she or hadn't she had her first kiss yet? He just had to know.

"Have you?"

"Have I what?"

She turned to look up at him, and Soul became aware of how close they were sitting now. He was able to count the freckles that littered her nose and cheeks, the blonde lashes that outlined her vibrant green eyes, and the cracks on her lips. It shouldn't have turned him on, but it did. And his body was overwhelmed with the need to wet her mouth with his, to read her of her chapped lips. To run his hand through her hair and pull out her pigtails. He wanted her, god did he want her so bad, but he couldn't.

They were friends. Best friends. And best friends didn't kiss without telling the other person they were madly in love with them.

"Have you had your first kiss yet?"

His voice was deeper and huskier than normal, would have made his skin boil if this were some kind of movie. Watching the couple on screen that he knew belonged together this close was pure, blissful torture. The question of would they or wouldn't they burning in the back of his mind, and the need for them to close the gap strong enough that he had to fight the urge to push them together.

Thank god their life wasn't like a movie then.

Maka's tongue flicked out to wet her lips, and Soul's breath almost left him at the small gesture. What would he do to kiss her right now?

"Yeah."

His heart dropped into the pits of hell, and his body went cold at her answer. He swallowed the lump in his throat before speaking again.

"Who was it?"

He didn't even sound cool to himself. God why did he have to be a flustered idiot?

"My first boyfriend back when I was twelve. Hiro."

Right. Of course. He should have known. It wasn't like Maka Albarn had pulled a Soul Evans and waited out to save her first kiss for her best friend. Because that would have been absurd and pathetic and sad.

But that still didn't stop him from wanting to skin the guy alive and wish that it had been him.

She gave a half-hearted shrug and smile. "It wasn't anything special, though. Just a normal not anything like you see in the movies."

"Were you expecting fireworks, a cheesy soundtrack, and doves to fly over your heads?"

"Take out the doves, then yes. But I guess it doesn't happen to everyone, right? The whole finding your true love when you're young and growing up to marry them."

"That shit only happens in the movies." But he wished it were true. "Was it worth it, though? Having your first kiss be with Hiro instead of someone else?"

"I don't really have much say on it since I did date a couple other guys after him." Her gaze dropped a little. "But I guess it would have been nice to at least have the whole fireworks and your world spinning happen at least once."

Maka looked back up at him. He swore she had moved closer to him at some point. The lavender of her body wash wafted up his nose, and it felt like the stars had aligned to give him this perfect moment. To give him the opportunity to come clean at that very moment that he wanted to feel the fireworks and world spinning experience with her. Soul felt himself slowly move forward to close the gap between them. Her breath was warm as it hit his face, and his heart pounded in his chest.

He wanted to kiss her so bad, and maybe she did too if her not moving away meant anything. Or she was as shocked as him that they were this close.

"Maybe you haven't kissed the right person to have that kind of reaction?" he offered, teasing the idea that she might possibly want to kiss him too.

"Maybe," she whispered.

Soul swallowed and licked his lips before making the conscious decision to move forward a little bit, and-

"Hey, guys!" Wes called out as he entered the living room, and Soul and Maka jumped away from each other to the opposite ends of the couch. "What are you two watching? Some cheesy romance?"

Soul would have very much liked to bite his brother's hand off at that very moment as Wes grabbed some popcorn out of the bowl.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Wes? I thought you were going back to campus today?"

Not like it mattered. The moment had been ruined, and now he'd never know if Maka loved him the same way he loved her.

"Nah. Decided to stay a little longer. See what you two kids were doing. Make sure neither of you tried to give me a niece or nephew before I was ready." Wes threw his sickeningly charming smile at his brother, and Soul was very close to clawing it off his face.

"Wes, just shut the fuck up and go do something in your room!"

"Oh, that reminds me that Jessica wanted me to go over to her place like an hour ago. I'll see you two later." His older brother dropped the uneaten popcorn back in the bowl and walked away. But not without throwing, "And don't be making out on the couch anymore," over his shoulder.

Soul fumed with anger and embarrassment while Maka's face turned as red as his eyes on the other end. There was no going back to how they were sitting earlier now. They both spent the rest of their Sunday jumping at the slightest thing the other did, avoided asking each other about what had almost happened earlier, and didn't bother eating popcorn anymore. She left his house without saying anything other than a cordial goodbye. The next day when he went over to her house, she had the same cheery disposition he was used to, and he knew that the almost kiss was in the past.

A week later, he had gone off to college without asking her or telling her how he really felt about her. Two months into his college experience, he had started dating a girl who was his first kiss, but the fireworks and world spinning didn't happen. Not even ten days into their relationship, he broke up with her because it was pointless to toy with someone's heart when his own belonged to another girl.

In November he told her he wasn't going to make it to her birthday party, but that had been another lie.