Yoko burst through the doors and skidded to a halt at the command chair. Rei Four, who had been waiting patiently at her own console, snapped to a salute.

"Captain on the bridge," she announced.

The other gunnery officers turned and saluted as well, and Yoko did her best to wave their respect off.

"Don't worry about formality, folks. I'm your captain and I'm wearing a bikini, in space. Do you think I care? Let's focus on the task at hand. Four, give me a sitrep."

Four tapped a few buttons at her console, and the bridge's physical windows were overlaid with a three-dimensional panoramic hologram. The effect was startling, but very convenient for their job. Four pressed another button, and the void of space was instantly separated into glowing green boxes, denoted with complex alphanumerics and minimalist symbols- a tactical overlay. Several zoomed-in images appeared, displaying slowly-rotating planets.

"There are approximately five hundred celestial bodies in this sector. Approximately four hundred of them are now on a collision course with the Cathedral Cosmos," she explained. "Many of these targets are small planetoids. Despite their lack of mass, a collision with any one of them would deal serious damage to the Cosmos, which would take time to repair."

"And that's time we don't have in hostile territory," added Yoko. "What can we bring to bear at the moment?"

"Our Spiral Energy reserves are at fifty percent," expounded Four. "Activation of the main battery is expected to draw thirty percent, leaving the engines with twenty percent power."

"That's too dangerous. The main battery is not an option. What about our secondary weapons systems?"

"Considering the situation, I recommend activation of the Wave Motion guns, Captain."

"And what exactly will those do to our planetoid friends?"

Four tapped with dull excitement at her console until long strings of equations began to appear next to each zoomed-in view.

"Breaching the cores of these planetoids may trigger a catastrophic disintegration event," she explained stoically. She drew an index finger through the air, and a green circle appeared as an artificial horizon across space. "This is the maximum range necessary for causing such an event."

"All right, ladies and gentlemen!" shouted Yoko quite suddenly, visibly startling her gunnery officers. "There's your mission. Everything that enters the killzone gets blown to high heaven, or you can kiss your universe goodbye!"

Yoko took her turn to press buttons, flicking a switch on the armrests of her command chair. The mechanical arm on which it was mounted raised the chair into the center of the room, giving her a full view of the proceedings.

"First target is entering firing range!" exclaimed an officer.

"Wave Motion Engine charged! Engaging the firing conduit!" shouted another.

Yoko watched the zoomed-in image disappear, their target becoming a green-highlighted twinkle tens of thousands of miles away.

"Firing solution ready," said Four, reading off her displays.

"On my mark," commanded Yoko, waiting for the planetoid to drift closer. Her officers knew this was what she was doing, but after a minute of her waiting, they began to doubt her methods.

"Captain Littner, we are ready to fire," reiterated Rei Four. "At any time you could issue the command."

"I know. I'm just waiting for it to get close enough that Artemis will remember what he's gotten us into."

"Excuse me, ma'am?"

A mischievous grin crept across their captain's face as she pulled her hat's brim in front of her goggles.

"Just make sure you all grab onto something. Mark."

The hologram was overwhelmed with white-blue light as the Wave Motion Gun discharged its planet-busting beam into the center of its target. The zoomed-in screens reappeared, showing the once-vibrant planetoid crumbling away into the briny black.

"Excellent shooting, guys," smiled Yoko. Four did her best to express a foreign emotion called 'concern'.

"Captain, at that range, some of the debris will impact our shields."

"Which is why I told you to hold onto something."

"But, Captain, this action may put the ship in danger."

"There are two things that will get put in danger, Four," explained Yoko. "One, whatever sector gets hit might get a brownout as the shields try to compensate, so your buddies may not be able to read their Nietzsche; and two, Artemis is in grave peril of losing his freshly-poured glass of spring water. And that will be quite worth the danger."

Four could not think of anything better to say, so she replied with, "Of course, Captain."

Robotnik slowly tightened another screw into place, which would finally lock the primary servo in. The replacement arm for his Egg Robo would be complete, and he could then spend the last hour of his shift calibrating it. Machines were nice and orderly like that, everything about them boiled down to a process. If only people could be so simple.

"Hey, fatso, you're getting paged," snarled Koboi from her workstation. Robotnik looked up and found that, yes, his communicator was indeed buzzing. He picked up the small, square tablet from the corner of his desk, scrolled through the menus, and found that he had received a text message. It took him a moment to recognize the name.

Granger? That was the lady from earlier, right? What does she want?

He opened the message-

Are you busy?

Robotnik was not exactly sure what to make of it. He looked to his left and right, as if he was about to stuff a tube of toothpaste under his jacket and walk out with a tip of his hat to the cashier, to realized that he and Koboi were the only ones left at their stations. He had let time get away from him again, but it was no matter. He did his best work on as little sleep as possible, so a late evening at the lab was nothing he was concerned about, much unlike the text. He typed his reply quickly.

No
...GET A LOAD OF THIS

Have u ever built exoskeleton?

Robotnik let out a sigh that was half disappointed, half relieved. He had sort of expected an offer for a date, but he knew that robotics was his forte, not romance, and that if she approached him, he would undoubtedly screw it up. That, and he was certain he recalled seeing a ring on her finger, which would make things very complicated. So he thankfully returned his focus to the question- exoskeletons, yes, he had indeed built them. He was very good at building them, even if they had never been successful. That wasn't his fault, for once.

Yes
…GET A LOAD OF THIS

R u using a signature?

No
…GET A LOAD OF THIS

OK so if I needed to lift some things could u make an exo for that

Yes
…GET A LOAD OF THIS

OK do that and fast and send it on an elevator to Personnel
Koboi is a bitch dont listen to her

why do u need exo?
…GET A LOAD OF THIS

to lift some things. Thnx bye

"Koboi, I'm going to need your help with something," he grunted, getting up from his seat and wandering to the parts storage bins.

"Oh, so I get your work done, and now you need my help, that's how it's going to be, fatass?"

Robotnik drew something flat and rectangular from both of his back pockets.

"Oh, what's that? Are you going to bribe me with chocolate? It's going to take a lot more than that-"

He fanned the five extra bars he held in each hand open.

"And what do you need help with, Robotnik?" asked the pixie, suddenly more cooperative.

"We're going to build an exoskeleton," he declared.

"Like, a heavy lifter?"

"Ho ho ho!" he chortled. "An Egg Lifter!"