Reasons why NOT to join the Fellowship of the ring

by Elleth of Hidden Lore

Have you ever wanted to join the Fellowship of the Ring? Do you have a thirst for adventure, magic and glorious battles? Well, think again. Do you really think being in the Fellowship is that easy? Would you survive months without a bed, bathrooms, toilet paper, and internet? No, of course not. Join Alexandra as she goes though the adventure she never wanted to have. T for language

14. Reason 14

First of all we want to thank you all who have stuck with this story, it is quite fun to see how you guys react to this Comedy. Today's chapter is a quite short compared to the last few, but in truth we think that in that short paragraph Alex expressed herself quite well.

Enjoy!

14- Legolas makes me feel less of a woman, he's too pretty

Perfect long blond hair, sparkling blue eyes, smooth and flawless ivory skin, tall, lean frame, long arms and legs, delicate looking hands, musical voice, perfect posture, graceful manners and a dashing smile. I'm describing the perfect girl aren't I? Well no, I am talking about the one and only Legolas, you know, the ones the fan girls go gaga for. You'd think I'd feel better having such a beautiful man in the group, but no. I feel ugly besides him, he's too pretty! How does a man make me feel less of a woman? Is that even possible? I mean, come on, beside him I look like a rag doll that has been run over by a pack of Mûmakils! Let me tell you fan girls something, he may look pretty, but his personality sucks! He is an uptight, egocentric, know-it-all, rude, tree hugging beautiful, beautiful, BEAUTIFUL, heck, GORGEOUS elf. Dam it why must he be so pretty?! I cannot believe I spent weeks feeling conscious about myself and secretly trying to be at the same level of beauty of a male!

Yes! Weekend! Time to sleep until the bed itself kicks me out! Have a wonderful weekend all!