Chapter 4: Reach Out

I was seated outside, beneath the only tree in the back yard. The day was warm, the sun shining through the leaves and dappling the ground below. The breeze blew gently, and I wondered just where things were to go from here.

Thetis had again been adamant that he knew nothing. This whole thing bothered me, and he'd told me that maybe sitting outside would help my mind clear enough that I could remember. He'd left to get mail after that...

Footsteps in the grass caught my attention, and I turned to see Atlas standing nearby. "Mind if I sit?" she asked. I nodded, and she sat beside me. "Talked with Model F... Apparently he and H heard us. They deactivated to give us privacy."

"So we did have sex then," I said, sighing. "I suppose the next move then is getting some testing supplies and seeing if you're with child or not."

She frowned. "We'd have to wait a while, right?" she asked. "Because I was thinking about a more immediate solution."

"And what would that be?" I asked. "I think it's a bit late for pills, Atlas."

"Wasn't thinking that..." she said. "Thinking about packing up and going home."

I stared. Going home? She couldn't mean going back to that wasteland she was born in... right? "You mean Nu Arkaya?"

She nodded. "I'm homesick, and it's not like there'd be anything or anyone holding me back from going. I've spent too much time away and it's making me go soft."

"But what if you're... You couldn't fight if you were pregnant! You could get killed!" I protested.

"That's the risk a soldier takes. My mother survived with me and my brothers, so why wouldn't I be okay?"

"But-!"

"Hey, you said so yourself you didn't want to marry me, and you'd have to if I was," she said in a matter of fact tone. "And don't go trying to deny it; my memory is sharper than you think."

"I'd still take responsibility if you were, Atlas. We don't even know that yet, so why are you talking about leaving?"

She frowned, staring at me. "...Okay. Lemme see if I can try something. If I stayed, and took the test, and tested positive- what would you do?"

"Well I'd have to marry you. It'd be the only proper thing to do."

She nodded, "Okay, and how would you feel about the whole thing?"

"What do you mean?"

"Would you be happy about becoming a father?" she asked, letting out a frustrated sigh.

I blinked. "Happy? Well I... I don't know..." I said. "It would be unexpected, unplanned, and I have no idea how-"

"Better I just leave then," she said, starting to get up.

"Why?" I asked. "We don't even know for certain either way yet!"

"And if you wouldn't be happy then what's the point of knowing?" she asked. "Least if I left, we could both be happy no matter what happened."

"I wouldn't be happy if you left either," I said, getting up. "None of us would..."

"...You'd get over it," she said, starting back toward the house.

I frowned, going up behind her and catching her wrist. "..." I honestly didn't know what I was doing; I just thought that if I could hold on a moment I could maybe change her mind. "Since when did you ever run away from a challenge, Atlas?"

"Let go, Aeo," she said, glaring back at me. "I'm only warning you once."

"No. I am not letting go until you promise you will at least TRY," I said. "I'm not running from this, and the Atlas I know wouldn't run either."

She growled at me, before lashing out a leg and sweeping my feet from under me. "I said let GO!"

The sudden loss of support had the opposite of her intended effect. I gripped her wrist harder as I fell, and she was pulled off balance and onto me as a result. I had the wind knocked out of me. "What the hell is your problem!?" she shouted, pushing up and gripping my shoulders.

I looked up at her, catching my breath. "I'm trying to do the right thing here; why is that bothering you?" I asked, fighting the urge to try pushing her off. It would've helped nothing.

"Because you don't stay with someone because it's the 'right thing', Aeo," she said, getting off of me and sitting to one side. "Not where I'm from, no. Where I'm from you stay with someone because you love them, or at the very least enjoy their company."

I sighed, just laying there. "I... I know that. I know where you come from, Atlas. I'm trying to keep that in mind, honestly I am..." I said. "And I know you're trying too, to understand my viewpoint on this. It's just... I don't believe either of us will get the whole picture. We just see things too differently..."

"I hate it..." she said simply, pulling her knees up to her chest.

"...Pardon?" I asked, sitting up.

She narrowed her eyes, not looking at me or anything in particular. "I hate that I don't get how things work out here. And you're right- I try... I had to try from the moment I left. Had to try even harder when they pulled me apart then put me back together for the sake of these damned 'equality laws' your people follow..."

I frowned. Of course they didn't have those laws in Nu Arkaya... The general consensus among the nations was that there were only Mavericks in that place we knew as The Wastes. It stood to reason that she'd lived the entirety of her life there in a completely natural body.

That was a different thing altogether from growing up seeing others with machine grafted into them- expecting that to be done to you once old enough... Looking back, I'd actually been eager to have mine done back when I was only five. "What'd they wind up replacing, if you don't mind me asking...?"

"Ears... Spine... and I don't know how many of my muscles or which ones..." she said.

I nodded. Sounded like a highly invasive process if her musculature was augmented also. "So they really did pull you apart..." I said quietly. "I guess you looked different back then?"

"... Not too much... They let me keep the basics." She sighed, "I'm just not sure if my own brothers would recognize me if I went back, you know...?"

"I'm sure they would," I said. "If you -did- go back, that is. I still don't want you to..."

"Why?" she asked sourly. "You can't tell me you really care and be honest about it. All this time you've only ever been afraid."

"Yes, and I still am. Anyone in my shoes would be, I think." I glanced over at her. "But right now I'm more afraid of losing a friend than of possibly becoming a parent."

She blinked, before a faint grin tugged at her lips. "We'll just have to see then, I guess... I do still want to go back though..." she said, looking me in the eyes. "Still homesick."

"Well, if that's the case we can all go together," I said. "After we get you tested... Okay?" I stood, offering a hand up to her with a smile.

She smirked, grabbing my hand and getting up. "Fair enough..."

We headed for the house, and I glanced back at her. "I'll have to talk with Model H to clarify exactly what happened. Still don't remember a thing."

"Congrats on getting completely smashed then..."

"And laid, apparently," I added with a bit of a laugh.

She rolled her eyes. "You men... It's always about the sex."

"Not always!" I protested, before noticing she was grinning again. Teasing- of course... I huffed, before chuckling slightly. "Well, at least you keep me on my toes."

"... 'Course I do; I'm taller."