Reasons why NOT to join the Fellowship of the ring

by Elleth of Hidden Lore

Have you ever wanted to join the Fellowship of the Ring? Do you have a thirst for adventure, magic and glorious battles? Well, think again. Do you really think being in the Fellowship is that easy? Would you survive months without a bed, bathrooms, toilet paper, and internet? No, of course not. Join Alexandra as she goes though the adventure she never wanted to have. T for language

17. Reason 17

Sorry I haven't replied to any of you yet, I was very burdened with homework and tonight will be the same. But I will happily reply to you tomorrow or when I have the time.

This idea was inspired by Ghost.

17- Eek! There's a snake in my boot!

Snakes, bugs, mice, lizards, every type of horrible creepy crawlers you can imagine will appear on you at nights, crawl on you, poop on you, bite you, scratch you, sometimes even poison you and make you need to ask Aragorn to check on a nasty lump that makes it look like you have a third butt cheek. As if I didn't hate Middle earth enough, I find myself constantly being harassed by Mother Nature. They have spiders here the size of your head, and I'm not even talking about the giant spiders of Mirkwood which I've been told can swallow a person whole three times my size. Thankfully we never got too close to the dark forest. I wish I had a gigantic can of bug repellent, but I would probably be harassed by the elf, claiming that it is harmful to nature! *Tch* That freaking tree hugger!

One time when we were getting up early to continue on our journey, I was putting on my boots when I felt something cold and smooth wiggling inside my boot. I was still for a few seconds, trying to process this strange feeling, and when I finally had the courage to look inside the boot, I saw two tiny glittering eyes staring right at me. Let's just say I think I woke up half the forest with my screeching. After a few long minutes of chasing me around the forest, trying to calm me down so I wouldn't pinpoint our location to the enemy, Boromir finally caught me in a death grip and put his hand over my mouth to shut me up. A few good few seconds of hyperventilating later, Legolas brought over the little fella that was inside my boot: a harmless milk snake. I started screaming again when I saw it, but thankfully Borimir was there to sooth me again; he even scolded Legolas for bringing the snake over! That day, Boromir was my hero… and the go-to-guy whenever I needed help dealing with any kind of creature here in this godforsaken forest.

Windy-san: I know I would react exactly the same way as Alex did. I hate absolutely hate bugs and all those other creepy forest critters… except for butterflies, those are cute. I wouldn't last five minutes in Middle earth.