We are so sorry for not updating for so long. We are in our last weeks of class so work in literally none stop. We have the next few prepared but the list is long and we still have not had the time to describe each reason yet, but rest assure this week there will be updates.

This reason was inspired by Aria Breuer

28- Never underestimate a hobbit… ever

So there are some things you should know about hobbits, and that is that, even though they are very pacific and loving beings, they can be very aggressive if they want to. There are three main things you should never say to a hobbit:

First of all, never call a hobbit defenseless or useless… they'll prove you wrong. Once I was practicing my fencing with Aragorn, and Merry and Pippin were watching me. At the end of the section, I sat down near them and ask them why they didn't practice a way to protect themselves since right now they were so defenseless, and in the way I was saying it, it pretty much sounded as if though I was calling them useless. I noticed Merry didn't take it so well, but I truly meant no harm. I just wanted for them to be prepared. So I turned around and prepared to leave, when suddenly I feel the air being knocked out of me from behind. I fall to the ground, struggling for air when I feel a sharp item pocking my back. I turn my head around to see Merry with his sword on my back. There was a mixture of mischief and seriousness in his eyes. I was dumbstruck as I looked at the hobbit who, seconds ago, I had thought utterly defenseless. After that he sheeted his sword and offered me is hand. I had to apologize to him of course.

Second, never call a hobbit pipsqueak. It happened one time when I was quite tired and neither Pippin nor I noticed that we were walking into each other. I bumped into him and it took me a moment to notice him down there. I was tired and in a bad mood so, instead of apologizing, this came out:

"Watch where you're going you little pipsqueak,"

So that evening I went out to do my business when suddenly I hear a roar behind me. I darted out of the place, though I heard a roar to my other side, so I took off in a different direction. Between roars from one side and another, I didn't notice where I was going until I took a wrong step and fell into a hole that had been covered with leaves. I was buried up to my neck in the ground. I struggled for a moment until I saw Merry and Pippin come out of the bushes with leaf-made megaphones. Turns out, Pippin didn't take the "Little pipsqueak" thing very well, so he and his cousin devised a plan to lure me into this hole. Pippin walked over and, standing over me, said:

"Who is the little pipsqueak now?"

Had my arms not been pinned to my sides within the hole, I would have choked the little devil right there and buried him in this very hole. I was screaming for a few minutes until Boromir found me and helped me out. He then had to literally wrestle with me to keep me from killing the two cousins. He ended up throwing me over his shoulder and carrying me back to the campsite. For three days, the hobbits stayed clear of me. It was clear that they would not do me much harm, but I would definitely wring a neck or two if I got the chance.

Thirdly, don't ever confuse them for children. This was really an honest mistake. I was very thirsty one day and I had run out of water, so I sneaked into Boromir's things and retrieved the first water skin I found. I took a great, big gulp of the contents. Big mistake, it turned out to be some sort of alcohol beverage. I immediately felt the fuming sensation in my head and I knew this spelled trouble, so I put his things back in order and distance myself from the place. Three minutes later, I was singing "Single ladies" from Beyoncé and hitting a major happy note. While dancing my way through the campsite, I saw the hobbits huddled near the fire, and in my intoxication, I went over there and said:

"Heeeeeeey, l-little *hic* chilllldren can't be in the night clubs. You guys ain't even o-old enough to *hic* drink!"

My memory is a little blurry after that. Next thing I know, I'm hanging upside down from a tree, my legs tied to the branch, while screaming my lungs out. After a few good minutes of hanging upside down, my face already red from the blood flowing down, Gandalf found me and brought me down. When we got back to camp, every time the hobbits looked at me they would giggle and mutter things between themselves. I suspect they were behind it, but I'm still not really sure since the alcohol makes my memory all fuzzy…

Hope you enjoyed this!