CHAPTER 4
Will was relieved that the world hadn't ended, because it meant that he had more time to spend with the people that he loved. But at the same time, he was devastated about the news from his doctor. His infertility explained why Terri hadn't gotten pregnant with him. While he was grateful for this leading up through the events to being with Emma, it saddened him to know that he couldn't have kids with her either. He wasn't sure why Emma wouldn't talk about it with him or why she hadn't told him how her appointment went, but something told him that she was just waiting for the right time.
He started his new History class going over the French Revolution until he noticed an unfamiliar student enter the classroom, followed promptly by Cooper. Normally, he saw the students as everyday regular people that he needed to teach, as any teacher should, but as soon as he looked at her, something seemed to spark inside of him. He wasn't entirely sure what the feeling was, but it was a good feeling regardless.
The girl was clearly sixteen years old, highly attractive for her age, with sand-colored hair and emerald green eyes; she smiled at everyone when she entered, baring startling-white, straight teeth. She had a satchel strapped securely around her, and had a confident, alluring stride as she went to her seat.
"Pardon the interruption, William. I just wanted to ensure that your new student got to class safely."
"Uh… it's fine. And a new student? Now?"
"She's kindly requested a transfer from Culinary Class, and yes, it is irregular time-wise, but at this time I'd like to introduce you to McKinley Sophomore Brooke Hoffman."
Will looked at her in concern, but when she looked back at him, it was as if a tidal wave of pheromones found its way all over him. He fought hard to overcome it, and gave her a warm, welcoming smile.
"Well, uh, welcome to History. You're just in time to hear about the French Revolution."
"It's a pleasure to be here, Mr. Schuester. Cooking just wasn't for me."
"So, I'll leave you to it, then", said Cooper, and he turned to leave, but gave Will a questionable look before going.
"Okay, so in 1789…" Will began, but as he lectured, he found it hard to avert his attention to Brooke, whose gaze alone was enough to distract him.
INTERLUDE
Brittany and Matt headed into the auditorium, where Alexander was sitting impatiently, strumming his bass guitar.
"It's about time. What do you want, Brittany?"
"Hello to you, too. I realized that we haven't really talked when I asked you to help with my test."
"Oh, how sad. And why are you here, Matt?"
"I'm here for her. We agreed to work together so that she will be able to graduate."
"I'm backing out of the play to focus on my grades, which have gone up significantly since Sectionals, but they're still not enough to allow me to get out of here, so I was hoping that you could help me again", said Brittany, trying hard to maintain a smile. Alexander rolled his eyes, stood up, and balanced the guitar on its end, transforming it into his cane in a tall puff of smoke.
"Okay, seriously, man. How do you do that?" asked Matt.
"Does it matter? Brittany, do you honestly believe that you can't graduate without help? You're clearly dependent on others to get you through the day, you're still in a long-distance relationship with Santana, and you're asking a commonplace magician for help with improving your grades. I'd be amazed if you were even allowed into college with that going on."
"Hey, don't talk to her like that. Brittany has everything to get her out of this school and onto bigger and better things", said Matt, moving to come face-to-face with him.
"Does she really? Because last time I checked, she failed to live up to her presidency, proved her learning disability on countless occasions, killed a man ("Accidentally", Brittany interrupted), and is on the cusp of repeating her Senior year a third time around. And why are you, of all people, supporting her in this fashion, Matt?"
"Because she's my friend, and I stick up for my friends."
"Right. Brittany, if you want to graduate, depend on yourself. In the end, that will be your job when you enter the real world."
"You said 'when', not 'if'. That means you believe in me", said Brittany, grinning broadly, and Alexander groaned in irritation and turned to leave.
"Dude, come on. She's asking for your help because she wants it, not so much that she needs it", Matt called after him, but Alexander turned his cane back into a bass guitar and angrily performed an original song, "Living Success Story", with Rory, Joe, and Xavier joining in.
INTERLUDE
Because of the casting changes, Sam leaving without telling anyone why, and Emily retreating to operate the sets, the production had been made worse, putting more pressure on Artie to make it a success. Brittany had also backed out to focus on her studies, leaving them without a Carlotta and Firmin. Immediately taking advantage, Wade approached Artie.
"I understand that you don't have a Carlotta anymore. I humbly offer my services."
"Wade, I appreciate what you're doing, but you're already cast as Piangi."
"In case you haven't noticed, I have a magnificent voice, enough to fill the role of a diva character."
"If we recast you, then we have a problem."
"There are plenty of other students at this school, most of them portly enough to participate. But I'm going for a lead role. You know how fantastic I am, and there is an opening, so I will have the role, and I will take it all the way", said Wade, immediately transitioning to an energized and glamorous cover of Cher's "Woman's World" under the persona of Unique, in front of the Glee Club to establish his interest in taking the role of Carlotta. When he was finished, everyone but Amanda applauded with sincerity; her clapping was visibly sarcastic.
"How wonderful a performance about how we ladies can dominate the male culture, both literally and figuratively. And how appropriate an artist selection, seeing as how you sound just like Cher when you sing. And I think we can all agree that she has one of the manliest voices ever. So congratulations, you've managed to insult both men and women alike in just one inspiring musical performance. I'm so look forward to working with you", she drawled, reprising her mocking applause.
"If you must know, I was born to play a role like this, while you and your stick figure physique can continue to try and fail to suck up to the masses that will be the audience coming to see the play. I'm willing to bet that they've never expected to see such a bizarre change in casting for the lead female role that you'll be the downfall of everyone in here. Won't that be so sad, to be responsible for letting down your peers because you couldn't take a hint?"
"Okay, that's enough. We have a lot more to prepare for, and we don't have time for this. Since we do not have any more people wanting to come in and fix our casting issue for Carlotta, I'm going to give the role to Wade/Unique. Congratulations to you. Can we move on, please?" said Artie, throwing himself between Wade and Amanda, who had started to get up. At that point, Blaine entered the room with another boy, surprising everyone.
"Where have you been?" said Becky.
"How did we not notice he wasn't here?" Joe whispered to Matt.
"Guys, I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine. His name's is Jack Winter, and he's interested in auditioning for Piangi", said Blaine, allowing Jack to address the club. Everyone found it difficult to absorb what they were seeing: Jack was morbidly obese, so much so that it looked like his clothes would split at any second with every step he took. He was Caucasian, his face was riddled with acne, his brown hair was matted and dirty, and his hands looked like they had seen more video game controllers than books. When he smiled, everyone saw heavy indications of gingivitis.
"You're like a walking cliché, dude", said Hannah.
"This may not be the most ideal look, but I can sing. And I'd like to prove it."
"Are you looking to join the Glee Club, too? Because I don't think I'll be able to stand looking at you for at least a millisecond let alone be in the same breathing space", said Amanda.
"Uh, no, but I am interested in participating in the play."
"Well, then, this must be your slightly fortunate day, because we've always wanted to work with someone so big that he must have lived in a bean-bag chair his whole life and chowed down on nothing but Doritos and meatball subs, easing all of it down with Mountain Dew and Slushees."
"I have an adrenal gland disorder."
"Oh, good, so that means we have to endure being tossed around the room by a prepubescent Nutty Professor, eventually having to meet his Klump family. Tell me, do you also play your parents? Because I'd love to meet them someday."
"Well, Mr. Winter, if you have anything to offer to help us keep this play going, then I say we should give you shot", said Artie, moving to shake the kid's hand.
"Sure, if you like having a Hutt in our midst", snorted Amanda.
"That's enough. Show us what you've got, Jack", said Will, giving Amanda a stern look. Jack took center stage and performed a cover of Train's "50 Ways To Say Goodbye". When he was finished, everyone but Amanda clapped.
"Wow, that may have been the most depressing song I've ever heard anyone sing, let alone a love-life-depraved, smelly, unattractive, living Dancing Jelly Bean. I'm almost amazed at how little a candle you actually held to Unique, whom I equally despise but enjoyed watching a heck of a lot more", said Amanda, smirking maliciously.
"Cut it out, Amanda. Dude, you are hired", said Matt, covering her mouth and moving to embrace Jack like a brother. Everyone but Amanda followed suit, as she was busy eyeing him with the utmost contempt.
INTERLUDE
Will packed up to leave for the day, but quickly found himself cornered by Brooke. All at once, Will was overwhelmed by her incredible allure, but he fought down whatever wrong feelings he had and looked her in the eye.
"So, you're Brooke, huh? Did you need something?"
"I don't know. Do I?"
"Well, if you don't, I'm going to head out. I suggest you do the same", said Will, glad that she was keeping her distance.
"Everyone around here says that you're one of the best teachers at this school. I'm wondering if the rumors are true."
"That's part of the fun of rumors; you never really know where people stand with them. If you'll excuse me", said Will, but Brooke stopped him in his tracks with just a touch of her hand.
"Do you want to know the real reason I wanted to change classes?"
"No, actually, I don't. Have a nice day."
"I switched because the teacher was boring. I mean, there is only so much you can really get out of cooking, but I'm looking for newer and, shall we say, fresher recipes to experiment with", said Brooke, almost in a whisper. Will fought to avoid eye contact, and finally managed to work his way around her, bolting for the door. All she could do was watch him leave with an amused smirk forming on her face. She eventually turned to break the fourth wall.
"Don't act so shocked by what I'm doing here. It's typical nowadays for students to develop these tendencies, particularly teenage girls. Let's face it: at this age, hormones rage to the point where they're almost uncontrollable. I've practically given up on finding the right guy. All it takes for me is a guy."
At that point, Brooke performed a cover of Rihanna's "The Hotness", promptly surrounded by a platoon of male students practically revering her throughout the performance. Brooke did not seem to mind their presence, as she was too busy allowing her incredible allure to rope in the attention.