The Betas
The group was gathered at the Magic Shoppe for the usual Saturday night.
"As you'll recall I do have a firm grasp on temporal magics," Anya began.
"Didn't that spell misfire and summon a vampire version of Willow?" Giles asked dryly.
"Yes, but that was because I'd overestimated Willow's current skill level and she interrupted the spell in mid cast," Anya replied.
"I could pull it off now, easy," Willow said firmly, not wanting to be reminded of how she used to be.
"Good, because I'll need your help for this," Anya said unrolling a scroll with a complicated spell on it and placing it on the counter.
"What is this?" Giles asked pulling out his glasses.
"I have told you about the many vacations I took with Hallie," Anya pointed out. "Didn't any of you wonder how we managed that while working for a demon lord not exactly known for his generosity?"
"Nope," Xander replied easily. "I figured they were all working vacations."
"I never put much thought into it," Buffy said to a chorus of agreements.
"Well the way I did it was this spell," Anya replied. "It teleports us not only to where, but to when as well. So we leap a month back and have a nice long vacation without suffering any loss of business."
"Whoa!" Xander said impressed.
"A month vacation in the middle of the year..." Buffy trailed off wistfully. "I didn't think I can afford it."
"I'll cover it," Xander said. "We could all use the break and this is the only way we can do that and keep the Hellmouth covered."
"You have cast this spell before?" Giles asked curiously, thinking that if the spell was safe enough it might be just what Buffy needed right now.
"Repeatedly," Anya said. "Normally I wouldn't include you all, because it cuts into my naked Xander time, but we at least need Willow because of the power requirements and Buffy because I like the Hellmouth closed and she's looked a bit tired lately."
"Thanks," Buffy said dryly.
"You're welcome," Anya said cheerfully, completely missing the sarcasm.
"Room for one more?" Spike asked, not expecting a positive answer.
"Yeah," Xander replied, thinking of how much Spike had helped with Glory.
"Seriously?" Spiked asked in shock.
"Your dues in the Scoobies are paid up," Xander said with a sigh, hating having to say it aloud.
"Where would we go for a month and can we play the lottery?" Dawn asked.
"We have to go far enough away to avoid temporal ripples and paradox, so no contact with home or buying lottery tickets," Anya said forcefully.
*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*
"What's with the cooler?" Buffy asked Xander, who was sitting on a family sized cooler as they gathered with all their luggage.
"Soda, Sandwiches, and such," he replied. "It just doesn't feel like a vacation unless I have a cooler for a picnic."
"You look like Van Hellsing," Dawn told Spike, who was wearing a wide brimmed leather hat and gloves in addition to his ever-present leather coat.
"Just don't want to catch fire if our arrival time is off by a couple of hours," Spike said reasonably.
"And the crossbow and weapons?" Dawn asked with a smirk.
"It completes the outfit," Spike admitted. "It was a good movie, alright?"
"I blame you," Giles told Xander.
"What? How is it my fault?" Xander demanded.
"You've corrupted him," Giles said.
"Let's get started on the spell," Anya said. "We can argue about Xander's ability to taint demons with humanity later."
"Everyone in the circle while we double check," Willow ordered.
"I've always wanted to go to Disney World," Dawn said.
"Looks good," Willow said after rechecking the calculations and circle.
"Agreed," Giles said after he'd finished his own check.
"I can't find any mistakes," Tara added.
"We should arrive just after sunset, giving us plenty of time to find lodgings without Spike catching fire," Anya said cheerfully. "Everyone ready for the Florida heat?"
The group of demon hunters, with the exception of Spike, were dressed for the beach in flip flops and swimwear.
"Silly question," Anya said cheerfully and began the spell, Willow and Tara quickly joining in.
The lines of chalk began to glow with an eerie luminescence as the spell progressed, a phantom wind whipping everyone's hair and causing Spike to put a hand on his hat. As the chanting reached a crescendo there was a flash of light and the image of three teen males appeared before them, right before they vanished with a clap of thunder.
*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*
"It's done," Warren said proudly. "All it took was a touch of power to unbalance the spell and send them far, far away."
"We didn't send them to hell or anything, right?" Jonathan asked nervously.
"Anya had tons of safeguards built in," Andrew said shaking his head. "They probably ended up in an alternate timeline, lost like Sliders, but not dead."
"All that matters is they're not here," Warren said smugly. "Boys, the Hellmouth is ours!"
*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*0*
The cold wind and snow tore at them like a living thing, stealing warmth from them. Fortunately they were only a few feet from a door and when it was found to be locked, or possibly frozen shut, Buffy simply broke the lock with a palm strike and drug her shivering sister inside as all the men grabbed the nearest witch and carried them inside as well.
The inside was as cold as the outside, but it was a lot more bearable without the wind. Everyone huddled together for warmth as they glanced around at where they were. Iced over windows provided enough light to see what looked like a medieval tavern.
"Fireplace!" Giles pointed out urgently.
"I've g-got a l-lighter," Spike said with an uncharacteristic stutter.
"Where's the wood and kindling?" Buffy demanded, bracing the door closed with a bench.
Xander quietly searched for paper, returning with a handful of menus while Buffy piled logs from a wooden bin into the fireplace.
"What happened?" Buffy asked, once they get the fire going and everyone had stopped shivering.
"Did you see three nerds?" Anya asked.
"Warren, the robot pimp and Jonathan who tried to kill himself when I was telepathic," Buffy agreed.
"The third one was Andrew," Xander agreed. "Tucker, the Hellhound guy's younger brother."
"So what's up with them?" Spike asked giving his coat to Dawn and Tara to huddle in.
"They interfered with the spell," Anya explained.
"I'm going to check to kitchen," Xander said. "I'll be right back."
"Don't wander off too far," Buffy ordered as he left.
"Where are we?" Dawn asked.
"Disneyland," Buffy replied holding up on of the menus Xander had brought her to show a familiar looking mouse but with Cyrillic lettering.
"Russia took over the US?" Spike guessed. "And why am I so bloody cold?"
"Nuclear winter?" Anya offered.
"That would explain much," Giles said.
"We're in an alternate timeline?" Tara asked, recalling a little of the temporal theories she'd read up on to help cast the spell.
"It looks that way," Willow said.
"No seriously, I'm a vampire we don't get cold," Spike said anxiously.
"What are you talking about?" Buffy asking grabbing one of his hands and examining it. "You've warm and have … a pulse?"
Spike pressed two fingers against his throat and felt the pulse.
"I'm alive?" he said in wonder.
"Anya?" Giles asked, wondering what all her safety features covered.
"I may have forgotten to account for transporting a vampire with us in my calculations," she admitted. "I put in fail safes to prevent death."
"And how did that reverse it?" Giles asked.
"Moving though a central point we are all one for a moment," Anya explained.
"Like the enjoining spell?" Buffy asked with a groan.
"Kinda, but completely not as well," Anya said.
"So, to sum it all up, I am alive, we're in a post nuclear Disneyland, probably the only people alive above ground in fact," Spike said.
"Can't we teleport home?" Dawn asked.
"Not enough power," Anya said with a sigh. "We're stuck! This is our new home now."
"It'll only take me a day or two to regain my strength," Willow argued.
"Without the Hellmouth to draw on you won't be able to get remotely near enough power," Anya disagreed.
"You were drawing on the Hellmouth?" Giles asked Willow in shock.
"I was drawing on the Hellmouth?!" Willow exclaimed. "I thought I was drawing on Gaea."
"Oh yes," Anya said. "Ask Tara."
"Tara?" Willow asked.
"I-I didn't know," Tara admitted. "I should know and it's on the tip of my tongue, but I don't know for some reason."
"Oh," Willow said quietly changing the subject," So we're stuck here?"
"How are we going to survive?" Dawn asked worriedly.
"Like a bloody wolf pack!" Spike said, doing his best to reassure her. "Primitive tribes have not only survived, but flourished in harsher conditions than these!"
"Really?" Dawn asked hopefully.
"That is true," Anya agreed. "The simplified social structure has allowed them to accomplish much, while modern day human would still be sitting around arguing."
"I'm not trying to go all 'Clan of the Cave Bear'" Spike said, "But I'm definitely the alpha male and It's obvious who the alpha female is," he said.
"Me!" Buffy and Willow chorused before locking eyes.
Xander returned almost ten minutes later, dragging a pair of duffel bags. "I hope everyone here is a Disney fan." He took in the scene with Willow and Buffy on either side Spike, glaring at one another, while Tara was staying as far from Willow as possible, while still being near the fire with Dawn comforting her. "What did I miss?"
"If we want to survive we'll have to mimic the primitive tribes," Giles said authoritatively.
"And Spike declared himself the alpha male," Xander guessed, "Leaving Buffy and Willow to argue on which one is the alpha female."
"Side effect of the spell means I'm alive," Spike said proudly.
"Then why aren't you moping?" Xander asked, distracted by several things running through his head at once.
"Why would I mope?"
"Aren't you tormented because of all the horrible things you did as a vampire?" Xander replied.
"Not really," Spike said honestly. "You have to be what you are. When I was a monster, I behaved as such, until you lot and Mad Maggie Walsh started changing me. I'm human now, which means I'll feel bad if I do something monstrous, but I don't have the urge to anymore and I'm not going to winge on about what a demon did that I remember. See, it wasn't me as I am now."
"I can actually understand that," Xander agreed. "Now about the whole … tribe thing –" he began.
"Xander," Giles interrupted. "Normally I applaud your humor, even when I'm pretending otherwise, however this time we can afford no dissension or jokes. For the sake of humanity, please just say you're with us on this."
"Everyone is in agreement?" Xander asked and everyone met his eyes and nodded. "And no one wants to hear what I have to say?
"Not this time," Buffy said.
"Sorry," Willow apologized.
"OK, fine," Xander agreed. "The two duffel bags are filled with clothes from the gift shop, sweats with Disney characters on them."
Everyone quickly put on sweats, grateful for the added warmth.
"Nice work," Spike told Xander giving his shoulder a squeeze and looking him dead in the eyes so he knew Spike meant it.
Xander found himself smiling, although he tried to tell himself it was in amusement and not because his contributions were being acknowledged. "Once we get bundled up, we can retrieve our bags from outside, which will give us enough food for a couple of days while we wait for the storm to pass so you guys can go hunting."
"On it," Spike said grabbing Willow and Buffy who were both wearing yellow track suits with Daisy Duck on them.
Dawn and Tara had chosen blue Baloo sweats, one of which Xander quickly put on himself.
The remaining two sets were of some pink hippo none of them recognized that Anya and Giles laid claim to and covered up with a pair of white bathrobes.
"I don't suppose they have beds in there?" Dawn asked hopefully.
"No, but I do recall air mattress and fresh towels," Xander told her.
"It's a start," Tara said softly.
"I'm not stupid enough to ask if you're OK," Xander told Tara, "But if you want to talk, I'm here."
"Thank you," she said. "I-I'm here for you too."
Xander's eyes darted over to where Giles and Anya were talking, standing very close together and acting very…familiar. "A lot can happen in a couple of minutes," he said.
"Come on," Dawn said pulling them into the kitchen while explaining to Xander everything the group had figured out.
"So those three are alphas, we three are betas, and Giles and Anya have taken up being shamen?" Xander finally said.
"Yeah, sorry," Dawn said.
"Better now than after we were married," Xander said with a sigh, a bit relieved and feeling guilty about it. "We were moving much too fast anyway. And in a complete change a subject, why have we become a tribe?" Everything seemed…off somehow.
"Because our best guess is we have ended up in an alternate timeline where Russia took over part of the US before rising tensions lead to nuclear war and a nuclear winter," Dawn explained. "And the spell isn't powerful enough to get us home from here, and Willow can't use the Hellmouth's power to do it."
"Oh, taken in that light I can see where this makes sense," he admitted.
"You knew something," Tara said.
"Yes I do," Xander agreed as they exited the kitchen and into the store room of the gift shop through a back passage.
"If we're in our own world, we'll return home after three months," Tara said.
"Does three months as 'Tribe' sounds fun?" Xander asked.
"I-it would give me time to try and straighten Willow out," Tara said.
"I thought you liked her bent," Xander teased.
Tara blushed. "I meant clean out the damage done by the Hellmouth and the sudden need to be alpha."
"Alpha is when your ego overrides your empathy," Xander said. "Trust me on that."
"You don't think she can change?" Tara asked, hearing something in his voice.
"After we met Buffy … she changed, or maybe I just never knew her, but she become all about being powerful and important. Love? That took a major dive in her priorities, or maybe It was just love of me."
"I feel like I should know the answers to all of this, but I've forgotten them," she said.
"We've got three months to clear our heads and relax without the world going to hell around us," Xander reminded her.
"The energy here feels very clean," Tara admitted. "It should be enough to draw out and cleanse any Hellmouth energies we've absorbed."
"That's the spirit," Xander said. "There is more than enough stored supplies to keep us warm and comfy, and if we need food, Spike or Buffy can hunt for some local game."
"Ah," Tara said with a smile, though a small one. "I'll just try to relax and enjoy the time off."
"I found a Russian scrabble set out front," Dawn said, poking her head inside the room. "Help me find a dictionary so we can play!"
"And we can learn Russian while we wait!" Xander said with a smile.
"That does sound fun," Tara said following dawn into the better lit but significantly colder shop.
They returned with boxes full of supplies, to find Giles and Anya tending the fire while the three 'alphas' looked through everyone's bags for anything useful.
"OK, I get the axe and the knives," Buffy told Xander. "For a Scooby vacation weapons are a must, but you're got, like a thousand condoms!"
"One thousand and fifty one," Xander said with a grin. "I like to mess with airport security and forgot that I picked that bag for just such an occasion."
"I say you're psychic," Spike disagreed. "In a world where we have no food, you bring on ice chest, no birth control, you bring condoms, and no way to defend ourselves, you bring weapons."
"Picnic, joke, and a habit." Xander shrugged. "But if it helps us, I'm glad I did it."
"I brought my birth control pills, a small can of mace, and four snickers bars," Dawn offered.
"I brought everything I'd need to ward a dozen motel rooms," Tara added. "I figured better safe than sorry. No food, but I did bring some tea."
"When daylight comes…"Spike trailed off with a big smile.
"If the storm has died down, you can see if there's a better place to stay or possibly raid for supplies," Xander finished for him.
"Yeah," Spike said with a wide smile. "Now let's turn a couple of these tables on their side so they'll reflect heat back on us from behind."
"All we have is air mattresses and beach towels," Xander said, "so that will really help keep us warm."
Xander and Tara slept with Dawn in between them, holding them tightly. It was obvious despite the brave front she put on, she was scared, even with their reassurances.
Giles and Anya slept close to the fire and Giles had to quietly convince her several times that sex would have to wait.
Spike slept between Buffy and Willow, both of whom lied half on top of him. Xander would have said Willow's behavior was out of character, but she'd changed a lot and he wasn't around her enough to really say anymore.
'Well,' Xander thought to himself, 'At least now I'll get a chance to get to know her again.'
Typing by: AzureSky123
AN: Tabula Rasa was a great episode, but it ending way too quickly for my tastes. The idea of them losing their memories and trying different roles to discover who they were was a great one, but naturally the show screwed up the execution and tried to just emphasize how they all should play the same roles with little change so they wouldn't upset their 'girl power' fan base. Bah! I made some changes and now the gang has to figure out who they are again, even if they still remember who they were. Hopefully I got the feel of it right.