Everything was quiet for the first few days, Molly spent most of her time at Mungos with Arthur and Sirius kept the rest of us busy at the house. Molly left a list of chores every morning and every one would be as tiresome as the next.
With Molly's absence, id taken to cooking with Kreacher but Monday night I gave him the night off, telling him that he should spend some time alone in the attic; the others had been cleaning it all weekend and I'd begun to tire of Kreacher mumbling about the "dirty blood traitors taking Kreacher things"
I was stirring a large cauldron of soup when Remus entered the kitchen, taking my favourite chair by the fire. With a flick of my wand a small silver tray of tea things flew to his side and we smiled lightly at one another as he helped himself to the streaming tea.
"I'm glad you're home, your Fathers missed you; I've missed you." I smiled at him shyly, "I've missed you too Remus." We both hurried ourselves to settle into our tasks, me chopping onions while Remus read a large volume of Chaucer's works. After a few uncomfortable minutes of silence, Remus spoke up, "do you miss him much?" I looked across at him, no expression showing on my face, "of course I do. How's Tonks?" I turned from him so he couldn't see the little flash of jealousy I knew would be obvious in my eyes. "Nymphodora is perfectly well." "Good." I turned back to him, noticing he was looking at me questioningly. "She has nothing on you Lena. I feel nothing for her." "It makes no matter to me Remus, I've made my choice." It was true, I had, but as expected, being back with Remus, I'd begun to redevelop the feelings I felt for him, his trinket box was in fact wrapped neatly in the scarf in my trunk. I knew I only dreamt of Remus because I longed for Severus, and the dreams I had at night only proved that.
The last few nights my dreams had been filled with images of myself lying in Severus's arms in spinner's end; I could only hope that these were visions of what was to come, not what could have been. I'd still had no word from him but I knew that it had only been a few days and he couldn't risk sending me word just yet, it would be too suspicious.
"How is everything Lena?" I looked at him sadly and shrugged. "I'm scared I guess. I'm sure Dad's going to work it out somehow" Harry already knew and I was pretty sure Hermione was close to working it out. Dumbledore definitely knew, as did Phineas Nigellus. How much longer could our little secret really remain secret?
"That can't be all that's worrying you Lena, I heard you screaming out last night, you woke me." It was true, last night I had been blighted with visions of Severus's crumpled body and there was somewhere deep within me that knew everything was going to be different on his return, something was going to happen; I just didn't know what.
"Can I talk to you Remus? I need to talk and I think you'll be the best listener, but please, don't judge me for it." He nodded and after stirring the chopped onions into the soup I crumpled onto the tiny sofa beside him. "I have this feeling; something awful is about to happen and I don't know what to do." He smiled encouragingly, "We all know things are changing Lena, the wars about to begin, it will be difficult for all of us, but we all know where we stand." "That's just it though; I don't know where I stand. I want to be by Severus's side of course I do, but what if he chooses the wrong side? Do I need to follow him? Would he follow me?" He frowned darkly, "Lena are you telling me you're going to follow Snape, no matter what he does? No matter the path he takes? You'd really consider it?" I looked away, shame bristling my skin. "We discussed it, me, changing, taking that side." "Lena, you can't be serious?" "I am, but Severus refuses to help me change. He's told me he'll follow me but I can't help feeling he's in too deep. Please Remus," He shook his head and his fingers splayed manically through his hair, a motion I'd become to associate with moments of great stress, "Please Remus, listen, if I do it, get…branded, I could follow Severus and play the spy."
"You don't get it Lena do you?! You're the greatest chess piece! You're Sirius's daughter! You'd never be truly accepted, certainly never trusted. You could be used against both us and Severus. Voldemort will kill you Lena! Never doubt that!" The tears spilled down my cheeks and Remus's arms wrapped around me safely. "Why can't it be easy Remus? Why have we all got to be part of this game? I wish it was simpler, if only Severus wasn't playing spy! If only I didn't love him!"
"Maybe you don't?" It was barely a whisper but his face was so close to mine he might have been shouting it" I shook my head vigorously; "You doubt it so often! Maybe you don't really love him, maybe you just think you do." I pushed myself away from his arms and mulling myself up from the sofa. "Is this it? The way it's always going to be?! You'll keep fighting me over this? I don't love you Remus! I love him!" "Who do you love Lena?" Dads voice was clipped and I whipped around to face him, "Dad!" His expression was cold and he glared down at Remus. "This isn't what you think Sirius." Remus tried to keep his voice calm but there was an edge of fear to it.
"Shut up Remus! This is exactly what I think it is! I'm not blind! My best friend is in love with my daughter, it's her I can't work out. Do you love him Lena?" I shook my head, wrapping my arms around myself, "no Dad." "Then who, the Twins?" I shook my head again. "No Dad" "Maybe we should leave this Sirius, Lena and I have already spoken about it, I'm being the foolish old man that I am, there's nothing between us, really." " The last time Lena was home, Kreacher told me he'd seen you together. I thought maybe time would put an end to it, I was obviously wrong." "No Dad" I rested my hands and he folded his arms. " I feel nothing for Remus, I doubt I ever have." It hurt when I said it and I knew what I'd said had torn Remus apart inside but he needed to hear it.
"Who is it Lena? Who are you in love with?" I shook my head, "You don't know him Dad, he's from school." "Why does it matter then, whether I know who it is or not?" "Please Dad, don't ask me, you'll kill him, if it doesn't kill you first. I'll put an end to it before I ever have to tell you!" "Remus knows!" I nodded sadly, not feeling I could lie to him about Remus. Dad leaped from my grasp before I could breathe and had pinned Remus to the wall within seconds. "DAD NO!" I pulled at him with all my strength, "If you can't tell me Lena, he will! He's already betrayed me! Tell me Remus! Who is it!" "PLEASE DAD!" His wand was at Remus's throat but Remus never took his eyes off me. "Tell me Remus, or I swear I'll rip your throat out with my bare hands! Its got to be bad right?" If Lena wont tell me! Its not that idiot that hurt you is it?" "No Dad of course not!"
"THEN TELL ME WHO IT IS DAMN IT!" His wand was biting deeply into Remus's throat now and the tears ran hot and heavy down my cheeks. "TELL ME LENA! TELL ME MERLIN DAMN IT OR ILL KILL HIM!"
"ITS SNAPE!"
Harry's voice cracked as he screamed at dad, Harry's own wand pushing Dad hard in the back. "Put him down Sirius!" Dad let Remus go slowly and Remus crumpled into a chair at the table. "Please Dad, " I pulled at his arm as I sobbed but he shrugged away and made for the door, "Please Dad!" My hand was tight around his arm but he whipped around quickly the hard skin of his palm meeting my cheek, causing it to seer with a prickly heat as I struggled to hold myself up. "You dirty little slut! That Cunt! How could you!? I want you out of this house! You're no daughter of mine!"
My stomach clenched in pain seeing the hatred in his eyes, there really was no love left there. I turned from him and Harry enveloped me in his arms. "Sirius you don't mean that!" Harrys grasp was steadfast around me, "Yes Harry I did! This is my house and we don't house whores here." Dad whipped around and strode from the kitchen without another word, leaving the three of us shaking with anger and shame.