"TH1S C1TY... YOU C4N SM3LL TH3 H1STORY TH3 GL4MOROUS CR1M3... TH3 R3L3NTL3SS PURSU1T OF JUST1C3 ON TH3 P1VOT OF SOC13TY 4ND 4N4RCHY TH1S C1TY ROLLS W1TH TH3 W1NDS BUT N3V3R TOPPL3S 1T CR13S OUT FOR JUST1C3 FOR THOS3..."

"Terezi, what are you doing?"

"SHHH 1M MONOLOGU1NG!" Terezi snapped back at Jane.

"It's just the two of us here." Jane pointed out. "You're talking to yourself like a darn loon again..."

"TH3 C1T13S CRY FOR JUST1C3 1S 1NT3RRUPT3D BY TH3 CRY OF 4 HYST3R14L D4M3 WHO 4PP4R3NTLY C4NT H4NDL3 4 MONOLOGU3 TH1S H4RDBO1L3D... 1 DUCK TO TH3 R1GHT TO DODG3 TH3 WR1T1NG UT3NS1L THROWN BY TH3 HYST3R1C4L D4M3..." As she did indeed do so, dodgin the thrown pen.

"Oh ho? Are you trying to say I'm soft boiled?" She asked indignantly. "I'm the guttsiest darn gumshoe there ever was! I solved all kinds of weird puzzle shit in my session, and..." She paused for dramatic effect, "I busted Carmen Sandiego in every single game!" She put her hands on her hips proudly.

"WH4TS 4 C4RM3N S4ND13GO?"

"What, ya'll didn't have a troll Carmen Sandiego?"

"NOP3."

"She's only the cleverest and most devious criminal in all of adolescent edutainment! She pulls off amazing heists, stealing things like world monuments, priceless art, pieces of history and all sorts of stuff." Jane began to recount, enthralled, as Terezi listened with mild interest. "But she's arrogant and proud and thinks she's untouchable, so she intentionally leaves clues and trails to help gumshoes find her, but their rarely smart enough and even then, she usually escapes. But I caught her!"

Jane went on a short while longer, recounting the theft and recovery of the golden gate bridge. She was practically out of breath when she finished.

"SK414N3TS NOT 4 C4RM3N S4ND13GO." Terezi frowned. "TH3YR3 NOT GONN4 L34V3 US 4NY BR34DCRUMBS."

"Yeah, that would be nice." Jane muttered. "We opened the detective agency to make some underworld connections but nobody wants to bring their case to eighteen year old detectives..."

"1 CONC3D3 TH3 PL4N W4S FL4W3D BUT W3 4T L34ST TR1CK3D SCR4TCH 1NTO BUY1NG US TH1S OFF1C3."

*knock knock

Both of them turned towards the front door of the office, and on the second knock Jane has already bolted from her chair to the door. She opened it, coming face to face with an older woman: seemingly in her early 30s, with short blonde hair and wearing a mail carrier uniform. In one hand she held a box with some evenlopes on top, while her other arm supported a bulging mailbag.

"Pamela!" Jane cried before grabbing her in a bear hug.

"Hi Jane..." She said quietly, waiting to be released to catch a full breath.

Amongst the Skaianet subjects, there were four (five including Snowman) capricians who had been deposited back into human bodies, all adults of various ages, unlike the teenagers that composed their majority. She was one of them: PM, the Peregrine Mendicant, having adopted a human name of Pamela March, and assumed a cover life as a mail carrier.

"SUP PM?" Terezi asked as Jane let her go and closed the door behind her.

"Just the mail." She offered Jane the box and envelopes. Jane took the parcels politely before setting the box aside on the desk and rifling through the envelopes. "I also got your message. About Scratch calling last night."

"Yup, and we finally have places to start digging!" Jane smiled. "Skianet's lobbyists and the Shiba's gang.

"Shibas?"

"SCR4TCH FOUND OUT WH3R3 W3 4LL C4M3 FROM B3FOR3 TH3Y TOT4LLY R3-WROT3 4LL OUR M3MOR13S."

"Apparently from a human trafficking ring the Shibas are part of." Jane cringed.

"Ohhh..." PM also paused.

"Well..." Jane drove away from the topic at top speed. "I think I figured out my in." She turned the laptop on the desk she sat on so that if faced the others, showing them a website.

Altimit Policy Solutions

"This is the lobbying firm that serves as the go betweens for Skaianet and the government." She told them. "Gonna get Scratch to doctor up my records and myself look reeeeaaaalllll attractive for one of their intern openings."

"OH N1C3! J4N3 ON TH3 B4LL C4TCH1NG 4LL TH3 R3D-H4TT3D P3RPS!"

"What?" PM raised an eyebrow with confusion.

"Inside joke." Jane smiled.

"Well, OK... but then how are you going to investigate the Shibas? I've heard about them on the street... they're less a gang and more like mobsters."

"W3LL..." Terezi smiled. "TH4TS WHY 1M K1ND OF GL4D YOU STOPP3D BY..." PM paused for a moment, and then took two-and-a-half steps back.

"Oh... no no no, I know where this is going..."

"CMON 1 JUST N33D YOU TO G3T US B4CK 1N TOUCH W1TH TH3M."

"You remember he tried to kill all of you right?" PM reminded. "And succeeded several times in several timelines!"

"Well, he was just playing his villain role..." Jane said. "None of us were really in control of anything that happened in the session. It was all the AI pulling the strings." PM crossed her arms indignantly.

"COM3 ON! H3D 4GR33 TO H3LP 1F YOU 4SK3D H1M! 4FT3R 4LL H3 W4S PR3TTY R3D FOR YOU..."

"And I hate him." PM said firmly. "With all of my hate."

"FOR TH3 GOOD OF TH3 M1SS1ON PL34S3!" Terezi begged. PM fumed, paced a few times, then let out an exasperated sigh.

"Fine, I'll call the damn devil dog for you!" She muttered, taking out her phone. "Fat lot of good it'll do..." She hesitantly unblocked a number, and then moved it back to her phone book. One more quick tap, and the screen displayed:

Calling... Jack Noir...

Jack Noir: Answer.