"Karma! I was just telling you notto kill people!" The poignant odor coming from the classroom definitely smells like something had died.
"Relax," he says slyly,"it seems as if sensei found his 'lunch'." The devious expression plastered on his face can only mean one thing: He's at it again. It's the third time this week that he has pulled some kind of trick on Norio-sensei. I get it. He hates the guy more than anything. But it doesn't mean he can just go around replacing lunches with foul concoctions made of who-knows-what and telling the clerks at stores that they're going to be robbed by a middle-aged man. For the rest of the day, the entirety of the old school building and its surrounding areas all stink of dead fish and mounds of hot garbage.
After school lets out, I head to a nearby cafe to get something to eat. Well, more like to be away from home for as long as possible. Busy places such as this one are my favorite spots to just sit and people-watch for hours on end. Everyone's lives seem so interesting compared to mine. Honestly, a lot of the time, I'd give anything for a day in the shoes of someone -or anyone- else. I finally begin to relax after another long, treacherous day at school as I gaze out of the large window to my right, taking in the scenery of the bustling streets. There's a mother and her child strolling into a convenience store across the street. A businessman in a neatly ironed suit making his way into an office building with his nose in the air. Some of my former classmates coming straight towards the restaurant I'm in.
Oh. That'snot good.
They peer around the dining area as I shrink back in my seat, attempting to hide from their accusing eyes. Luckily, I somehow avoid their gazes as they're led by a waitress to a nearby table. I become considerably more at ease as they converse, and go back to watching the outside world as if it were the best program to ever be broadcast on T.V. It's fun to imagine how I could, if my circumstances were different, be going out with my friends to arcades and karaoke or whatever other kids my age do after school. Even though I can't really think of anyone who would want to go with me (Karma is, after all, busy with his bully-hunting business. I wouldn't want to inconvenience him. He looks like he has so much fun pummeling other delinquents. And Kayano has her girl things to do with the others in the class.) we would have a great time together. It'd be nice if there were no curfews or homework and the like, but that's just life and there are not really any ways around that. I just have to go with the system and someday I might be better off than I am right now. I really do hope that it's okay for me to aspire, though. Dreams are terrifying things, I've always been told.
Occasionally, I glance over my shoulder at the group of four and imagine how great it would be if, by some miracle, they were to get up and leave before I did. With how long I've been here, though, that's probably not going to happen. I muster my courage and get ready to walk hastily out of the establishment. Halfway there, I hear a few snickers and turn around to find them staring straight at me before they quickly turn away and pretend not to notice my presence. It's obvious that they've seen me fantasizing about having a better life. I flinch the tiniest bit as my eyes hit the floor, and glare at then a bit as I continue my shameful walk out of the building and all the way home.
Mom's not in the kitchen. That can mean several things. One, she is going to be home late from work. Two, she's dead. Three, dad's back. Hopefully it's the third. Although, I don't know about number two. I've never tried that before.
Adrenaline rushes through me as I dash down the narrow hallway to my parents' room with a kind of excited spring in my step and fling open the door. "Hey, dad!" I shout gleefully, bouncing on my toes as a smile that nearly goes up to my ears crawls across my face, hoping to see him sitting there on the bed. There's not a soul to be seen in the empty room, as usual.
I'm on the verge of tears as I slink back into the kitchen with a heavy heart and spot a note on the table. Words were scrawled neatly on the small piece of paper that read "I'll be home later than normal. Make yourself something to eat." Somehow, the emotionless, blunt words my mother uses with me hurt even more tonight than any other. My appetite has long since left me, so I prepare a light meal for myself before heading off to retire to my room for the night.
The next morning on my way to school I meet a funny man. He is completely normal through and through when we first see each other. From the back, he looks exactly like dad. I walk ahead of him for a bit before turning around to get a peek at his face. Sadly, the two have no common facial features. I start to imagine him as my father, and soon enough, I can't tell the difference between him and the real one. He looks just like my imaginary friend from yesterday. I keep my distance from for a while, until I force myself into believing that he's my actual father.
"Dad." The augmented man turns to me.
"What, Nagisa?" he asks, almost accusingly.
"I-I want to know...dad, when are you coming home?" I spit the question out rather awkwardly. As if a fictional person- one that i've created using only my mind and the desperation of wanting to be loved- could answer such a thing. I realize that I'm going to be answering my own questions, but I want to know so badly that it aches deep down inside of me.
Then, all of my fears manifest with the two simple words that fall from his lips and hit me like a cinderblock.
"I'm not." Is his reply, an empty smile plastered on his make-believe face. Despair is what follows.
I break down in a cascade of tears and snot as I rush into him in a fit of rage. "Don't! Don't leave me, dad! Please! I'm alone. So, so solemnly alone. It hurts so much, you know. I don't have anyone to turn to! I never have!" The unfortunate passerby that just happened to be the one I temporarily turned into my long-gone parental unit was no longer a fabrication. He changes back into himself and I am still clinging to his tiny businessman chest. He gags and wheezes and begins to turn blue. His eyes bulge. With all of my might, I ignore his coughing and choking noises and suppress his struggles for a while until he stops and goes silent. I realize what happened a bit too late.
The man was dead. He had died of asphyxiation. And I was the one who had murdered him, all because of a trivial family matter I had worsened all on my own. All because I couldn't accept what I had. This wasn't his fault, nor my mom's or dad's. It was just mine. I stare down at the ring on his left hand, and the tears are pouring down harder than ever. Not only had a life been taken, but also one of a man with a family. There were people that relied on him, and now he was gone, never to be seen again. Now, all because of me, others will be forced to endure the very same hardships that I went through that had caused this entire mess. For a good while, I sit there and wallow in self pity. What a horrible person I really am.
Luckily, we were in a heavily wooded section of a park near our school that people didn't pass by without a purpose. With a bit of a hassle, I manage to drag the body deeper into the forest and toss it into a nearby river after weighing it down with some rocks. Soon enough, the fish will come to devour the flesh of the dead man, and all that will be left of the poor soul are the bones, which will either be found or carried out to sea. I didn't care which. Slowly, I erect a gravesite for him. As I rise to my feet, a breeze blows, rustling the foliage and running through my hair. I feel sick. I think today is a good day to take off from school.
I think this chapter is a bit longer than the other two. I really do hope that it's better than them, as well.
I'm not completely sure about this, but I think that if Nagisa really were to kill someone, he'd just be all like "Oops." or something. It's hard for me to read my own writing because I read things really fast and tend to cringe when they're mine. Ugh.
Sorry about the lateness of this. Testing's over now, so I can focus on this more... Well, maybe. I have a LOT of things going on in May, so I don't know. It was so hard for me to motivate myself into finishing this chapter. But it's over with now, and I don't have to worry about this until next week. Though, the next time I put something up will most likely be after May twelfth.
I've decided to do this story in arcs, each focusing on a different student. Each part of the story will last more or less throughout the entire school year, which will means this is going to be one helluva long story, and a bunch of work for me, too. Well, now that I've said that, all I can do is look forward to it. It'll be really cool to see how my skills progress throughout this. I can guarantee that the last chapter will be written much better than the first. I'll go back and rename the chapters according to the student they're based on, once I come up with a good name for each arc. I'm really bad at names. And conclusions.
Yet another thing I have no idea about:
flesh-eating fish. If there were, they'd most likely live in marine environments. But whatever.