Thursday 31st July
8am
Sam had just returned from having a wash and shower, to find Mr Solis and Tom standing by Charlie's incubator.
"What's wrong?" Sam asked worriedly.
"Nothing's wrong at all, we were just waiting for you to discuss his treatment for the spina bifida, that's all." Mr Solis smiled. "Now, I need your signature to take Charlie for an MRI so that we can get a good image of what we're operating on tomorrow." Mr Solis stated as he handed Sam a red clipboard.
Sam timidly glanced at Tom to ensure that he was okay with it, and he gave her an encouraging nod and smile so she signed it.
"Right, well we'll take him for his MRI at 9am, and his operation is actually 9am tomorrow. But we do need to discuss some issues, that could've been caused by the spina bifida because they aren't going to be fixed by the operation." Mr Solis stated. "Now, we don't know about any of these yet because he's been sedated and he hasn't had a wet or dirty nappy, but there could be some degree of, or total paralysis in his lower limbs, bladder or bowel incontinence, loss of skin sensation, and sometimes there are even problems with a short attention span, difficulty solving problems or reading, difficulty in understanding some spoken language and difficulty with visual and physical co-ordination, for example tasks such as tying shoelaces or fastening buttons." Mr Solis explained softly.
"And when will we know?... If there are any problems?" Sam asked curiously yet quietly.
"Well, severe paralysis will probably be detected when Charlie is brought off of sedation so that we can see how he moves but minor paralysis will be detected if he starts to fall behind his brothers and sisters at crawling and walking. Bladder and bowel incontinence is hard to pick up in babies because obviously they don't have much control when they are born, but that is usually picked up during potty training, and the learning difficulties are something for you to look out for. Otherwise, they might not be recognise until he begins education." Mr Solis explained.
"And, in your professional opinion, do you think he's got any of those?" Sam asked clinically and Tom slipped his hand into Sam's for support.
"Honestly, we really can't say yet because it's too early, but becuase the spina bifida is in his lower back, I'd like to say that paralysis of his lower limbs is unlikely because those sorts of problems usually come from the condition being further up in the spine." Mr Solis stated.
Sam was checking her phone for the first time that day and realised that she had loads of notifications on here facebook account. She opened it, and her mouth hit the floor.
"Tom, look at this." Sam said as quietly made her way across to Summer's incubator and showed him her phone.
"Jesus Christ!" He smirked. Sam's status - or rather angry rant - that she had posted the previous night, had gotten 132,846 likes, and 17,391 shares in less than 12 hours! "Wow, and the comments too." He smiled as Sam scrolled through all if the friendly comments that agreed with Sam because they didn't believe that she was a bad mum, and they also disapproved of how much the press were following the new family. Tom gently pulled Sam onto his lap sideways as they looked through the comments for a while, and then Tom resumed holding a hand with Summer whilst he kept his other hand on Sam's thigh.
"I feel really bad... I mean how are we supposed to be giving them all the same amount of attention while 6 of them are sedated?" Sam huffed.
"Im sure it'll get easier once they progress more because once they come off of the ventilator, we'll want spend more time with them, and it might sound harsh, but it's true." Tom stated. "I've got to go back to work next Wednesday." Tom sighed and unfortunately that was true too, because Tom had already taken the maximum paternity leave of two weeks. And neither of them wanted Tom to go back to work because Sam didn't want to be alone in NICU, and Tom didn't want to leave his babies, but he had no other choice, other than to leave his job. And with eight new babies and Sam on a poor maternity pay, he couldn't afford to do that.
"I know but... You'll still be able to come here on your lunch break, and mornings and evenings." Sam stated.
"Can you let me know if there's any news? Even if its a wet nappy, just give me a call or a text yeah?"
"I will." Sam nodded as she rested her head against Tom's chest. Slowly, Tom felt her become heavier and heavier until he realised that she had fallen asleep on his lap. Obviously the shopping trip the day before had worn Sam out. After all, it was her first time out of the hospital in two months and she had been carrying eight babies inside of her for 31 weeks whilst they got first choice of Sam's nutrients and she was left with almost nothing for her own body.
Sam was still fast asleep on top of Tom, and he too was slowly falling asleep however he jumped a little as Mr Solis entered the unit. The consultant was surprised that they were sleeping considering it was only afternoon, however he was sure that they wouldn't mind being woken for the news that he had.
"Would you mind waking Sam up please?" Mr Solis asked softly.
"Yeah sure." Tom replied as he tried to sit up, only Sam was quite a bit heavier than she had been before her pregnancy months ago as she was yet to lose the baby weight so he failed. "Sam... Sam... Samantha." Tom sung softly and Sam wrinkled her nose before she opened her eyes. "Well now we know why Ellie always twitches her nose." Tom smirked as he straightened up a bit and then they both looked attentively at Mr Solis.
"I've got two bits of news for you. Firstly, if Leah continues to develop at her current rate of improvement, then we will attempt to take her off of the ventilator on 4th August." Mr Solis stated and Sam and Tom smiled.
"And you think she's definitely ready?" Sam asked.
"I don't see why not, her lungs are almost as strong as her brothers' and she's just finished the course of precautionary antibiotics so she should hopefully be feeling a bit stronger in a day or two." Mr Solis replied confidently.
"And the second bit of news?" Sam asked impatiently.
"Ah, this one is a bit more exciting." Mr Solis smiled. "How would you like, to give Aaron his first cuddle?"
"Wh- really?" Sam asked in disbelief, as she'd thought that that day would never come - she had not yet held any of her babies at all, and they were already 5 days old.
"Really." Mr Solis nodded.
"What? Now?" Tom asked and Mr Solis nodded once more - he loved this perk of the job when babies hit large milestones in their lives.
"Tom, you hold him first." Sam ordered as she got to her feet.
"What? No, he's your little boy, you carried him for months so you deserve to hold him first." Tom said softly as he too stood up to stretch his legs.
"No, honestly. Look if you hold him now, then I can breastfeed him later. If that's possible?" Sam queried with Mr Solis.
"Yes, of course. If that's what you want." He stated. "Now Tom, you might want to change into a shirt that buttons up because it's best to begin with kangaroo care." Mr Solis stated and Tom went behind them to his holdall to get changed. "It's basically when you unbutton your shirt, hold baby on your lap and inside your shirt to keep him warm. You just have to be careful of the wires." Mr Solis explained softly as he took the lid off of Aaron's incubator and Tom, who had returned in a black and white checkered shirt that wasn't done up, sat down besides it.
Sam stood besides Tom as Mr Solis very carefully, picked up the infant in a white sleep suit and white hat.
"No pressure." Sam said quietly into Tom's ear jokily.
"Now, he's a little bit too fragile for bouncing at the moment, but the main thing is to keep him nice and calm." Mr Solis said softly as Tom opened his shirt, and Mr Solis placed Aaron on Tom's thigh. He wrapped the shirt around his baby as he rested against his father's chest, and all the adults were smiling.
"Sshh, sshh." Tom said softly as Aaron let out a few little noises before he settled down and closed his eyes once more. "He's a lot lighter than I thought he'd be." Tom admitted.
"Well at his last weigh in, he was 2lbs 13ozs." Mr Solis stated. The small baby, still with a wire attached to his foot to monitor blood pressure, and a nasal cannula providing oxygen, was adorable as he bonded with his father, and Sam looked down wondering if she would find it that easy. "Right, would you like me to organise Aaron's routine so that you can hold him tomorrow when Charlie goes in for his operation? Just to keep you occupied." Mr Solis asked.
"Um yes... Yes please." Sam replied quietly as she began to panic once more about the operation that would take place in less than 48 hours time. "I'm just gonna go to the toilet." Sam muttered before she disappeared from the unit, leaving Tom to hold his baby without his wife's support.
"God, having eight sick babies is so confusing and frustrating. And Sam's feeling worse than me." Tom sighed as he gently stroked Aaron's back.
"I know- well actually, I don't personally know but I can imagine. And I do know how annoying it is that you can only wait, and that you can't intervene, especially considering that you're doctors yourselves." Mr Solis replied. "When we get Sam to feed Aaron for the first time, I think we'll try it with her lying down on the mattress. It might take a bit of the pressure off of Sam, and it'll be best because of her recent surgery." Mr Solis stated.
"That's if we get her to feed him." Tom joked halfheartedly.
"Well, this is only a small suggestion but why don't you try taking Sam home for a night maybe once a week? And maybe she could go down to the ED and see her colleagues. Because the less time she spends in NICU, the more she'll appreciate it." Mr Solis suggested.
"I'd... Rather not, go home, I mean we're only just starting to get somewhere with holding Aaron so he'll need feeding by Sam won't he? I just don't want to leave them for such a long time." Tom admitted. "I mean, me and Sam wake up in the night sometimes, um not at the same time but just sometimes we've got too much to think about to be able to sleep, and the easiest thing to do is to read a story to them, or just to hold their hand."
"No, I completely understand." Mr Solis nodded.
Tom cuddled Aaron a little longer before Sam returned and she looked like she had been crying.
"Um... Shall we get this little man back to bed?" Tom said to Mr Solis as he gave him a look, so the consultant gently took Aaron and placed him back in his incubator, before he put the lid back over.
"I'll leave you to it." Mr Solis forced a smile before he left the room.
"Come and have a lie down." Tom said softly as he guided Sam to the mattress on the floor, and both of them faced each other under the covers. "Now, c'mon tell me. What's wrong?" He asked curiously.
"Who said anything is wrong?" Sam protested weakly.
"I'm your husband, and I know when something is up." Tom stated softly as he stroked her hair. "You look pale." He commented.
"I've just got a bit of a stomach ache, I'll be fine."
"Stomach ache as in you're ill, or stomach ache as in female stomach ache?" Tom queried awkwardly.
"Female." Sam muttered.
"Are you still bleeding?"
"Of course I am, I'm gonna be bleeding for the first few weeks. At least." Sam stated.
"Alright then, you've got a tummy ache. But why were you crying? Because you have an extremely high pain threshold."
"I just... No don't worry, it's stupid." Sam mumbled.
"No, c'mon. Tell me, I'm sure it's not."
"I'm worried about Charlie's operation." Sam mumbled very quietly as she pulled the duvet up to her chin.
"That's not stupid Sam, I'm worried too." Tom whispered as he pulled Sam into his arms and gently rubbed her back. "But I'm sure he's gonna be fine, they're all fighters... Maybe it'll help for us to get a calendar and write down all the times that something is happening so Leah coming off of the ventilator on the 4th of August, I'm going back to work on the 6th... I think that if we start a calendar it'll help us to focus on what happens next." Tom explained as he rested his chin on top of Sam's head.
As Sam felt safe in Tom's arms, she felt her uterus contracting to expel the blood lining that had cushioned her eight children for months and she couldn't help but curl up a little.
"Can you rub my back please?" Sam mumbled - she really wanted him to massage her abdomen because they had helped her through her menses before she fell pregnant but because of her stitches, that wasn't possible. She also knew the science as to why the pain gas getting worse - because she had barely entered labour before she had a c section, her uterus wasn't fully prepared for contractions and so sometimes it slowed down and sped up, resulting in a disjointed shedding of the uterine lining.
"Yeah sure." Tom whispered as he slipped his arms underneath her thin shirt, and then palpated her skin on her back. "Have you taken any painkillers?" Tom asked.
"I took them when I went to the toilet. They should kick in soon." Sam croaked.
"Okay." Tom carried on rubbing Sam's back for a good quarter of an hour, and he was about to ask if he could stop because his hands were aching. However, Sam had already fallen asleep - she was having another nap - so he just stopped and rested his hands on her soft skin.
"Wakey wakey..." Sam heard her husband sing softly as she opened her eyes to realise that she was on the mattress on the floor of NICU, and Mr Solis and Tom were standing over her. "Stay there, you can feed Aaron lying down." Tom stated and Sam suddenly realised that Tom had her son in his arms and Mr Solis was holding the oxygen canister that was attached to the tube that went under Aaron's nose. Sam was on her side as Tom laid Aaron down on the mattress besides his mummy, and he was in nothing more than a nappy, with a blanket underneath him, because they wanted to encourage skin to skin contact.
Tom knelt down besides the mattress, and Mr Solis did too, but Sam felt like she had an unnecessary audience.
"I'm only here because I'm a lactation specialist." Mr Solis said softly as Sam unbuttoned her shirt whilst Tom made sure that Aaron didn't wriggle off of the mattress. Sam had been wearing a nursing bra to make expressing easier, so she unclipped it and then scooped her arm around Aaron to get him closer to her. "Now because he's premature, you might have a few problems with latching..." Mr Solis stopped talking once he realised that Sam had already latched Aaron on, and he was suckling away.
"Really?" Sam asked innocently with a smug look on her face.
"Well done." Tom smiled proudly.
"Yes, well done indeed." Mr Solis nodded as the infant used his tiny hands to keep hold of his mother's breast. "Though you shouldn't assume that it will be this easy to feed the others." He warned.
"I won't." Sam said meaninglessly as she focused on her son, because it felt a little weird, however she still liked it because to her, that immediate bond meant that Sam was confident that her baby loved her because he was sure as to who his mum was.
"Right, let me know when you think he's done, but for now I'll give you some time alone; I'll just be in the side room." Mr Solis stated before he got to his feet and left the room,
Fifteen minutes later, Mr Solis returned because he knew that Aaron had an incredibly small stomach that wouldn't take long to fill, however Aaron was still latched on to his mother with his eyes closed.
"Is he still feeding?" The consultant asked curiously.
"No, he's just staying there." Sam smiled softly.
"Well I think it's time that we put him back to bed I'm afraid." Mr Solis admitted.
Sam looked disappointed as Tom wrapped the blanket around Aaron, and tried to lift him up, however he began to cry as he kept hold of his mother's breast, and as soon as Tom let go of Aaron and laid him on he he mattress again, he immediately stopped making noises and snuggled up to Sam.
"Can't he stay here for a while? Please? He's nice and warm." Sam asked as she snaked her arm around his body again and she let her son latch on again, though he wasn't actually feeding.
Mr Solis bent down and checked Aaron's forehead with the back of his hand, before he stood up once more.
"If he's not distressed, I don't see why not." Mr Solis admitted. "But you must keep him warm." He warned and Sam nodded. "Right, I'm gonna be in the side room." He stated before he left the room again.
Tom sat on the floor cross legged in front of Sam and Aaron, and looked at the beautiful sight before him.
"I bet that this morning, you didn't think that this would be happening did you?" He smiled.
After a little while longer, Aaron began to loosen his grip on Sam as he just laid on his side facing his mother, and slipped into a deep sleep.
"He's adorable isn't he?" Sam whispered happily.
"Well he must get that from me eh?" Tom joked.
"You wish." Sam smirked as she slowly moved to do up her bra and shirt back up.
"Oh, I was enjoying the view." Tom pouted and Sam rolled her eyes as she settled back down with Aaron with her arm creating a little barrier around him as if she was guarding him.
"I'm just waiting for him to ruin the moment by having a wee or something." Sam stated as she slowly closed her eyes.
"All you've done is sleep today." Tom protested.
"I suppose it's the anaemia catching up on me." Sam mumbled as she opened her eyes and looked at her son as he squirmed a little and then grabbed hold of Sam's breast again through her shirt.
"Have you been taking your iron tablets every day?" Tom asked curiously.
"Not quite..." Sam admitted quietly.
"Why not? Sam they're fairly high dosage because you're severely anaemic." Tom stated.
"But that's just it Tom, they're high dose which means the side effects are even worse." Sam moaned quietly so that she didn't disturb her child.
"What side effects?" Tom asked.
"You're a doctor, you should know." Sam stated.
"Okay um, nausea? Vomiting?" Tom asked and Sam shook her head. "Diarrhoea? Constipation?" He asked awkwardly and Sam nodded. "Which one?"
"Both, it's one one day and the other the next day." Sam stated. "They just make me feel awful." She added as she tickled Aaron's cheek with her thumb.
"Well how about-" Tom stopped as Mr Solis returned from the side room.
"Right, sorry but I really would like to get Aaron back into his incubator." Mr Solis stated solemnly.
"Okay, I'll get him." Tom said softly as he got off of his bum and squatted besides the mattress whilst Mr Solis grabbed the oxygen canister. They slowly took him back to his incubator, and attached the blood pressure monitor back to his foot, but the infant was clearly unsettled at being taken away from his mummy. Sam took Tom's hands to help her up, and then she went and held Aaron's hand through the side flap.
"It's okay... Sshh." Sam whispered. "Sshh..." She repeated softly until the little boy soon quietened down.
"Well he's certainly okay with being held." Mr Solis stated. "Just the taking away bit that he doesn't like." He joked halfheartedly. "It's up to you of course, but if you want, you could take up breastfeeding him full time." Mr Solis stated.
"How often is he fed?" Sam asked curiously.
"He has a small amount every 3 hours day and night." Mr Solis stated. "So at midnight, 3am, 6am etc." He added.
"Okay, I'll feed him." Sam nodded after glancing at Tom.
"But don't forget, you'll still need to express for Jonny for now." Mr Solis stated.
"Yep, sure. In fact, I'd better do that now." Sam yawned as she went over and grabbed a sterilised bottle from the box - even though she had to express into a bottle, none of them had drank from it because they either had been fed via a tube to their stomach (like Aaron and Jonny), or they only had IV nutrients like the others.
"My shift is over now, but the oncall consultant will be here any minute in case you need any help. But make sure you get plenty of rest, I think tomorrow is going to be a long day." Mr Solis hinted at Charlie's operation, before he left the room with only the eight babies and two parents left in the room.
"Breastfeeding eight times a day." Sam smirked at what she had let herself into whilst she put the lid on the bottle full of breast milk that she had just expressed. "And that's just one of them." She added.
"Well it's definitely the best for Aaron at the moment so I think you made the right choice." Tom stated as he went over, put his hands on Sam's shoulders and gave her a gentle massage to relieve her tensed muscles. "But you also need to look after yourself, and you can start but going to see Mr T about changing the iron tablets to another type." Tom stated sternly.
"I will... Tomorrow." Sam nodded reluctantly.
"Do you want to try getting some shut eye before his next feed?" Tom suggested.
"Couldn't have said it better myself." Sam smiled as she padded over to the mattress on the floor. "Hey, I can wear one of those nighties you got me now." She stated as she pulled out the dark blue nightie with buttons at the top.
"You do realise that you're technically not supposed to be getting changed in here right?" Tom smirked as Sam unbuttoned her shirt and pulled it off, but she remained facing away from him to hide her hideous stomach.
"You do realise that you're not supposed to be watching." Sam warned as she pulled the nightie over her head and pulled it down so that her bottom half was covered as she pulled her trousers down because the maternity pads that she had to wear made her look like she was wearing a nappy.
"No, I'm your husband I'm allowed to watch." Tom smiled as he came up behind Sam and kissed her behind the ear which he knew always gave her goosebumps - in a good way.
"You coming to bed?" Sam asked as she slowly made her way down to the mattress and then slid under the duvet.
"Um not just yet, I'm just going to read them a story first." Tom stated as he turned on his heel and headed for the story box that he had brought from their home.
"Each? That means you won't be in bed for another hour and a half." Sam stated as she got comfy and closed her eyes. Tom went over and kissed Sam goodnight on her forehead, before he began to read the first story to Bella because he didn't like always going in age order.
Soon, Sam fell asleep to the sound of her husband's soft voice, reading to their children. But after finally being able to hold their oldest child, would the next day be as productive with little Charlie's operation on his spina bifida?
Thanks for reading, please review :)