I do not own American Horror Story: Freak Show.
But this story is mine, all mine I say!
In the Absence of Light, Darkness Prevails
Dead of Night
It took months for her body to heal properly.
Long, tedious, draining months.
Every day the sun shone, Massimo carried her onto the balcony and laid her in the warm, healing sun.
He rubbed ointment on her stumps and molded the skin, smoothing it down.
His broad, strong hands careful and as gentle as possible.
Sometimes the pressure he set against them helped, sometimes it did not.
Tender as her healing flesh was, she gritted her teeth, ground them together.
And made no noise at all to betray her discomfort.
For she knew it was necessary.
And that he was doing his best not to hurt her.
He talked to her.
About anything. About everything.
About his childhood.
"When I was a young boy in Italy, my mother was a cook for a man who ran a large vineyard. After my chores were done every day, I would roam the countryside. Climbing trees as high I could to reach Heavens, in search of angels. I didn't know yet they walked the Earth disguised as people."
And he would smile at her as she wondered how, with all she'd done, he would think her an angel.
But then again, she told him nearly nothing of herself, past or present.
For she had no lovely stories to tell of the dark, sordid past.
And her present was full of him so that she need tell him nothing at all.
Full of him.
And her pain.
Her legs.
She could sometimes feel her legs.
The legs that were no longer there.
They itched.
They itched and burned and tried to move.
The flesh below the knees that those cruel, horrible men had torn off her.
The mutilated flesh lingered.
And made think she was crazy.
Sometimes she barely caught herself as she attempted to get up and walk on legs that were no longer there.
Massimo had to catch her once in his strong arms.
"Where do you think you are going, cara mia?" he queried gently.
And she had bite her lip to keep from bursting into tears all over again.
Sometimes her legs screamed in the long hours of the night.
And she lay awake, trying not to scream with them.
He never slept, that she could see. She always slept before he did.
And so, as she lay in the dark, attempting to stifle her whimpers and moans of pain, concentrating on the filtering light of the streetlamp coming in through the window, he moved silently to her side.
His voice, so soft, so caring, like honey poured over her searing agony.
"What troubles you so, cara mia?"
If she could have heard its mellifluousness over the sound of her own screaming legs.
She shook her head, tears streaming down her cheeks, unwilling to admit her weakness, even in the darkness.
"Please, please, my Elsa, please tell me."
She trembled, she gasped a sob, struggled within herself and fell completely apart.
Reaching out a clawing hand, she flailed at his shirt.
"M-my l-legs," she hissed in a terrified whisper. "They are screaming! They hurt so!"
He reached out a gentle hand and soothed down her hair in the dark.
"Your legs are not there, cara mia. They are gone. It is phantom pain."
He wasn't telling her she was crazy. He wasn't being cruel.
But she sobbed all the harder just the same.
"Please, please! Kill me! I cannot take this misery! It will drive me mad! Kill me!"
Massimo leaned closer to her, shushing her declarations in his honeyed-amber voice.
"No, no, cara mia. You must live. You must survive. So that you may see the sun in the morning."
He sat with her as she cried and trembled and tore at the bedding.
His hands, she scratched them here and there in her desperation, but he did not make mention of it at all.
And when she had worn herself down to exhaustion, he kissed her frail hands and rose to leave.
Panic welled in her that the demons in her legs would come back stronger when she was alone and she cried out in abject fear.
"No! Please, no! Do not leave me! Stay! Please! I will die if you go!"
He hesitated and she choked down another sob of despair.
Finally he moved to the chair again but she tugged him toward her.
"No, please. Here. Here. With me. Please. With me."
He paused again, then smiled kindly in the darkness.
"Of course, cara mia."
And lay carefully down on the bed with her.
She lay her head down on his chest and he cradled it in one hand. She was absolutely vulnerable as she had never dared with any other man she had ever known.
His arms enveloped her, strong and warm, holding her close.
She lay curled into his side, shaking and trembling, feeling his warmth and strength and she felt as safe in this world as she could ever hope to be.
They lay still and she felt her clenched body begin to slowly relax.
Finally, in a relieved, barely audible whisper, she spoke.
"Thank you, Massimo."
Her heart rate slowed down, her blood pressure lowered. Her temperature warmed with his body heat.
And sleep reached out toward her, stroking her senses with tendrils almost as gentle as Massimo's embrace. Dampening her still itching legs with serenity.
"Of course, cara mia."
Just as Massimo had promised, the sun arrived that morning to welcome her to the land of the living.
And warm her healing legs.
"You saved me last night, you know," she confessed almost shyly as she reclined on the balcony.
She felt different, hollow, as if she were all out of energy to hide whatever her new self was from him.
He shook his head diffidently as he continued to rub ointment onto her now smoothing stump scars.
"No, no, cara mia. I did nothing of importance."
She set down her plate of fruit and reached out.
Touched his hairy forearm, where the skin lay exposed, sleeves rolled up to the elbow.
"No, Massimo. I would have crawled out of bed and flung myself off this balcony last night had you not intervened and soothed my pain."
He looked her then, his expression momentarily unguarded.
And she saw that he loved her deeply.
Deeply and completely.
And she, in her self-doubt and uncertainty, looked away and said nothing.
Thanks to brigid1318, Sailor Pandabear, and Gracious Guest for your reviews.
It won't always be pitiful and sad, I promise. This is a love story after all and those have happiness too. :)