I don't own durarara!

Amaya is my own character and not from the serie,

"If I were the rain. . . that binds together the Earth and the sky, whom in all eternity will never mingle. . . Would I be able to bind two hearts together?"

I was running, I knew I was running, so how could it feel so much as falling?

On my way towards the ground before I could stop it, crashing toward a scene that would end in blood, lies and pain.

I shook my head- idiot.

The world in chaos, still everything was quiet, drained.

I had to know! Before it was too late, I had-I needed to make sure that izaya wasn't human.

Even tho it wouldn't matter, I didn't need to run, this was all just a game...

I'm sure of it, one other plot put together to mess with me, but in the back of my mind something told me that this was real, too real...

Izaya couldn't die, he wasn't human, right? Why did I even think like that, it shouldn't matter-it doesn't matter- I just needed to know, Amaya, everything. I was done playing games.

'The raven is falling, the snake have been crawling,

The night have been crying the raven is dying.'

Reikos song followed me while I ran, like an invisible twisted sidekick. It was something about it I couldn't shake off, that tasted wrong, like 3 weeks old ramen... Like Reikos ramen.

The rain was pouring down, laying my hair flat against my head, my clothes soaked. Raindrops falling down as individuals, screaming for help until they died, smashed and broken, ending up as small puddles filled with dirt on the sidewalk, never to be separated again.

'Down the road, 3 blocks away... Second to the left..'

I turned the corner, just to wish I never had.

Izaya laid back against the wall, his hair messy even thru the rain. He looked like a lifeless doll that someone dropped, landing with legs tangled and arms folded, it almost looked comical, unreal.

His face so pale, almost transparent, the same feeling again, like he was small, something fragile and easily breakable and maybe he was. Just that he hadn't let himself get broken until now.

Two fresh scars across his chin and his face filled with bruises, his jacket torn.

The crown around the work was the red rose, blooming on his side, the bullet wound, forming small flower petals in the rain..

Still, nothing will follow me more than those dead eyes. A pale milky red, clouded and broken.-like in the alley- I almost thought he was dead, because nothing close to life was there, like the soul had left only emptiness behind. A shell, a facade. When the workers leave the factory at the end of the day, not able to function on its own. Windows dark and inside empty.

I walked forward, standing over something so close to a corps...- This couldn't be real, it was just a bad dream right? I would wake up soon, I had to wake up soon...-

Shit, what the hell do I do now? My hands numb.

I coughed, as if to get his attention... We'll that was just stupid.

Dumbfounded I got down before him, sitting on my feet to get away from the rain, it was even worse up close, I swallowed.

Was he dead? He couldn't be dead right? I tried to look for any sign of life, a small pulse or sign of breeding, nothing...

"Are you going to sit there all day?"

I almost fell backwards.

A small fragile spark had found its way into his eyes, still it was like looking under water, a shadow version of its former self, a bad copy.

"what are you doing..."

"I'm dying shizu-chan, what does it look like?" Izayas voice didn't falter even if it was barely more than a whisper.

"No, I mean... What are you plotting?" It couldn't be real, it just couldn't." Your words are always reverse, you always lie..."

His mouth moved on its own, his voice monotone."I'm sorry shizu-chan but I don't have a reason for lying..."

"Amaya-"

"Dead and gone and soon so am I, nothing more to it."

Amaya... Dead? For how long? I wasn't sure what I had expected, of course she was dead... But when? Why, had Izaya killed her? Who was she...

"Yes, i killed her."

Always knowing what was on my mind!... So it was true... Izaya had killed her, but it didn't make sense, when he spoke her name, even in this state it was a word filled with love.

I looked back up at him, for gods sake, I couldn't do anything else than look at him, as if he was something unknown, something that shouldn't exist… And somehow, he was, because no human should ever be as broken as this, no one should ever deserve… This, right? Not even Izaya Orihara. He got paler by the minute. I tried clearing my mind. "I dont belive you."

He mustered a sigh, rather impressive in his state."I killed her, end of story."

"Oh, I don't think so flea, I want to know, everything... Tell me or-"

"Or what shizu-chan, you kill me? I think I can muster that much on my own, thank you very much."

"No, tell me because she deserves the truth." It was cheap I know… But i needed to know.

His gaze met mine, locking it."She died because I was weak and pathetic and couldn't save her, she died because I let her."

I just stared... The small spark had started to fade away.

"I don't think-"

"Stop, please spare me the comments, it was my fault, everything. I led them there, I couldn't stop them..." He said trying to collect himself while his voice had grown smaller and smaller, bitter, the small smirk hanged heavy."I saw her beaten to death,chained."

I didn't know what to say, what could I say? I had wanted to see if Izaya was human… Now here he was, shield broken and i still didn't know what to feel, what to do. Should I kill him? Could i even let my self kill him in this state?

So Amaya had died and izaya hadn't been able to help her? No, it was something more to the story, something he wouldn't or couldn't tell me.

"Who did this?"

Reikos words 'I guess you could say he has an appointment with the father of his creator.'... What did they mean?

He smiled almost fondly." My, my shizu-chan, you're oddly chatty today. No punching? No getting beat up towards the wall? I'm disappoint..."

"If you haven't missed it you stupid flea you're already punched up against the wall, who did this?"

He chuckled, such a painful sound that it made me want to vomit."ohh... Shizu-chan, don't worry I'm always and will always be yours." He blinked towards me.

I couldn't help the growl."stop it! Who did this! Damn it Izaya I can't even do this to you!"

"A gang, I can't say I'm really... Into the hole gang idea but... They got the best of me..." He smirked toward my reaction.

The small spark that had stayed with him seemed to falter.

The rain, the only voice to be heard as if it was crying for the broken boy in front of me.

His breaths got more forced and the pain more visible upon his face, damn it i didn't have much time,I tried to collect my mind... Shit.

The gesture caught me unprepared when he reached out a shaky hand. I didn't pull pack when he put it against my cheek, to shocked to even react.

It was cold, except the blood from where he had pushed it against his bullet wound.

"I'm sorry shizu-chan, I'm sorry that you wasn't the one that got to kill me, but hunting down the one who did it won't bring me back..."

I just stared at him."but leaving you like this, watching me die... At least I won't be the only monster, ey?"

Before I could say something his hand dropped, falling to his side- leaving a red handprint- his body lifeless, his eyes closed, he looked so peaceful, like he had accepted his faith… Well i sure as hell hadn't.

"Izaya...?" I sat down on my knees, my uniform soaked either way.

The rain somehow fell heavier.

"Flea?" I put my hand around his wrist, feeling for a pulse...

"Oi, Izaya snap out of it!" First nothing, then a small shiver, like a small bird.

It skipped a beat and I felt my self panic, without knowing what I was doing I ripped off the arm of his jacket, knitting it around his wound, covering the red rose.

His eyes flicked open and he tried to push himself away from me.

"No! What are you doing, why can't you just let me die in peace?!" He snapped my hands away."why can't you just let me die knowing that I'm not the only monster... What the hell is wrong with you! Why-"

"Shut up Izaya, I'm not doing this for you, if you want to see me as a monster do so, because I'm selfish enough not to let you die!"

He looked at me, his eyes wide. Forgiven the situation, i would have laughed. It was strange seeing him like this, without his emotions in control. He was like one other person, i realised then that i didn't know shit about izaya.

He was quiet, he just looked at me as if I had totally lost it.

"this is it, I'm leaving." Izaya said before he made an attempt on getting up on his elbows.

"Are you insane?! Stay still stupid flea, Oi, do you want to die?! Do you think you can just walk out of here?!" I yelled, ignoring how loud or who would hear.

"Don't fool yourself, he broke my legs, I'll just need to crawl..."

He?... So that explained why he hadn't tried to move away yet. I have to hand it to him he was strong, but he wouldn't make it much longer.

I ignored his childish struggle when I tied the ripped piece harder around his wound.

"What are you doing?"

"Lifting you up?"

"Don't." A warning.

"You'll die."

"I don't need to be saved by you, Don't you get it? I want to die! Don't you see, are you really so st-?"

"I do, that's why I'm saving you."

I lift him up, his black shirt sticked towards my body, colouring my cloths red. I had no other choice carrying him the same way you carry a small child.

"Well well well, just married..." Izaya muttered before he tried his struggle again."I don't get you shizu-chan."

"Nor do I."

"So let me down and let me die you protozoan!" He tried hitting me, not being able to move his legs… Shit i needed to stop this, he would bleed to death soon.. It was surprising he hadn't done so already.

"Why is it so damned important for you?!"

"Because I won't die knowing you tried to save me, you of all people."

"You won't die."

He leaped, falling forward, almost landing on the ground before I catched him, holding him around his arms.

His legs dangled unuseful behind him.

"Let me go!"

"No, I won't, because I won't kill you until you're you again."

He stopped."so that's what this is about?"

"That. And I want to know the truth."

"I told you."

"Maybe but not all of it, I won't believe you're human. Never."

"I'm not."

"I know!" Or I hoped so.

"I'm better of dead!"

"I won't argue."

"You... Don't you see? I just cause pain, I'm... I don't understand, I will never understand you humans, your language you're reasons. I was never one of you..." He murmured something unhearable."I'm sorry Amaya... I'm sorry...I'm-"

His head hanged."I'm so sorry-" He whispered as a mantra, like he had prayed it his entire life, I realised that he'd pass out when he suddenly stopped.

I put him in my arms again, so small... How could something like him be so small? something that causes so much trouble and pain… How could it fit in this tiny body? He even looked peaceful, and something more i couldn't put in place.

I started running, Shinra, by god don't let it be too late.

I looked down, his hair covering his eyes and his lips slightly parted. Even if his words had been soft whispers, I knew the pain that must hid behind them.

Izayas past... By all the horror he must have gone thru, no wonder he came out the way he did… If it was counted as retribution i didn't know, it still felt like it was something he hadn't told me, not just who had done this… But something else...

I just hope I won't be too late… Izaya stay with me!

So, this was fun... xD
I got inspiration from the doujinshi nemisis (a izayaXshizuo) one, so if you havnt read it yet you should!
As usual a review a day keeps the doctor away!
I always love to know what you guys thinks so... yea :3
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