3: "Lost friends"
Spending Sunday with Hayashida was fun, but it couldn't compare with meeting Ami for lunch again. As always, they updated each other on their daily activities: Usagi had stories and concerns about the earthquake, Ami spoke of the goings-on in the hospital… The subject predictably turned to romances, and for once, Usagi had nothing to say in that regard. Ami airily mentioned she wasn't seeing anybody yet, although there was a "fair possibility" that she would spend much more time around a certain young aspiring lawyer. Apparently, after having starred in a St. Petersburg ballet company for only one year, the woman had broken her foot and shifted to law— so she was Russian, a former dancer, and knew her way around legal issues. Usagi was impressed.
"Is she pretty? Or I guess I should say, is she nice? Heck, do you even speak each others' language?"
"A little. We're learning. She's only been practicing here for three years, so it's been slow going. But she's very smart…and yes, if you must know, she's quite pretty as well. But she smokes, too, and I'm not especially fond of that."
"Yuck. Any chance she'll quit?"
"Probably not."
"Ugh. But you're still interested in her?" She smiled.
"Minor vices like that don't scare me away so easily. Besides, it's not like she does it all the time. Maybe once or twice a day."
"Well, as long as you're happy with it…" Usagi terminated the conversation and sat in enjoyable silence as Ami whipped out a tablet device and whirled her finger around it. Seeing her working on this advanced piece of technology reminded Usagi of when they used to be Senshi (but what didn't, these days?). Back then, Ami's— or rather, Sailor Mercury's portable hand-held computer seemed like such futuristic fantasy, but now everyone had something just like it! Thinking back on those days made her sigh, loud enough for Ami to notice. She knew that look her friend was sporting, and put her device away.
"Feeling nostalgic?" Usagi nodded.
"You know, while I was surfing around the internet the other day, I watched some of those old animated programs they made of us. Man, talk about antiquated! I mean, sure, the animation and writing was great in those days, but after seeing what we have to offer today…"
"Still, they were more or less accurate," Ami said. "I'm still questioning several 'artistic liberties' they took, particularly with Rei's character. Her grandfather looks nothing like that, and the only Yuuichiro I ever saw around her shrine was a boy from a neighboring private school. They got the crows right, at least, and I'm glad they decided to include those psychic episodes she was prone to."
"Mine was worse," she groused. "I mean, I'll admit I wasn't the most mature person in the world, and yeah, I could have studied a lot more, but I never whined that much."
"No, I'd say they pretty much nailed it," she deadpanned. Usagi glared evenly at her friend and slammed her fist on the table.
"The only thing they 'nailed' was my looks! …Well, okay, so they did great on my morals, too, but I wish they hadn't made me such a pig when it comes to food."
"I stand by my earlier comment." She finally laughed as Usagi flared at her, and casually apologized. "But you're wrong on another count, Usagi. They never made you as noble as you really are. I mean, occasionally they focused on how wondrous you can really be, but only at critical stages. The people who made that silly anime never understood you were like that all the time. In-between snacks and sobbing, of course."
"Of course," she grumbled. Ami smiled and slightly diverted the subject.
"Have you ever seen any of the programs that made their way to America? They really tore those apart. Granted, these were made back in the day when the majority of Americans weren't familiar with anime, outside of Macross, Go Lion, and Astro Boy, but if you watch it and compare the two, it's still night and day. I mean, they named Naru Molly, Umino Melvin, Makoto Lita, and they called you Serena!"
"I think I remember something like that. Where did all that come from, anyway? I mean, they kept your name, and Rei's, and they just shortened Minako's name, but…Lita?"
"Well, Lita might have something to do with the American word for 'lightning'. Apparently they sometimes use punny names for their characters, just like we do."
"Okay, I guess I can see that…but what about Serena?"
"I was confused, too, so I did a little research…and Minako helped me." She blushed imperceptibly. Usagi smiled and waited patiently for her to continue. "Serena could be linked to the American word serene or serenity, which means 'peaceful', or it could have been connected to your fictional mother, Queen Serenity of the moon kingdom."
"Instead of my ACTUAL mother, Ikuko Tsukino."
"Bear with me," she gestured. "There's another theory that's proved to be the most interesting. This was where Minako helped the most. In Japan's collection of gods, we have Tsukiyomi, god of the moon. His name literally means 'counter of the months', and your name, Tsukino, is derived from his. But in Greek mythology, guess who is the goddess of the moon?" She smiled intriguingly, waiting for the lights to go on in Usagi's head. She furrowed her brows.
"Serena?"
"Selene, actually, or Selena. Add that to the American joke that in Japan, our L's and R's sound alike, and you have it. Serena— Selena."
"Oh, cool! I never would've thought of that! But they still could've just as easily called me 'Bunny'." Ami shrugged and polished off her drink.
"It was a strange homage all the same, from a strange series, and not an entirely unflattering one. Although I wish they had kept my hair a little longer." Hers, a faintly lighter shade of blue than the anime had presented it, swept down to her neck and ended just above her shoulders. Usagi smiled that her friend should be so vain.
"Yeah…and I wish my real relationship with Mamoru had ended up as well as my fictional one. It's too bad…" They both sighed, and seeing as how Usagi was content to let that be that, they moved on, one prodding the other about her love-life. It didn't bother Usagi at all to know that Ami was a lesbian: she had "came out" about seven or eight years earlier, just before they started living together, and had surprised everyone at first. After all, Ami hadn't seemed to be the type— if anyone was gay in their circle, it would've been misandrist Rei, or perhaps Minako (although that later turned out to be halfway true). Time had been kind to Ami, though, and everyone came to accept her and love her as they always had. Her sexuality rarely came up in conversation, unless Minako or some other lucky woman was mentioned.
"Enough about me," Ami said, picking off the last of her meal. "What about your love-life? You've certainly had enough time to pick it back up."
"Yeah," she grumbled, reclining slightly on the table. "I haven't gone on a real date in years. Most of the guys I know are either coworkers, too old, or they're already married. I don't know where to meet people. Say, does your lawyer friend know of any…" Ami looked at her strangely, then shrugged. The conversation died again as Usagi's head drifted down, landing on the hard, cold surface. Duty once again forcibly separated them, but before Ami left, Usagi pulled her aside for one more chat.
"Say…Ami, I've been thinking. Could it be possible for you to have a full day off?"
"Of course. I'm actually off in two days, and again next Monday."
"Okay, but bear with me on this. If I could somehow convince Makoto to take a day off, and if I got Rei to do the same, maybe we could call Minako or— "
"That wouldn't be possible, Usagi," she answered regretfully. "Mako's one thing, and I suppose Rei and I could manage to pull away eventually, but Minako isn't even in the country anymore— she's not even in the same hemisphere."
"Oh, really? Where is she now? Do you two talk?"
"Not regularly. We email each other a lot— she's in Rio de Janeiro."
Whoa. Usagi's face lit in astonishment. That was a long way away.
"Is there any chance she could be doing, say, a Japanese tour? Maybe visit her hometown?" Ami shook her head.
"She hasn't mentioned it, and I don't want to interfere in her business affairs. That's the vow I made when we broke up."
"But why? You two loved each other so much…"
"We've been over this before, Usagi," she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration. "We both knew everyone would ask questions, so we agreed to be honest about it. But I'm not opening up old history. I'll talk to Rei and Mako; maybe we can get together sometime, schedules permitting. It has been awhile."
"It's been even longer since all five of us…" she grumbled. Ami sighed, perfectly sympathetic with Usagi's dilemma, secretly envious that she could wear that emotion so easily on her sleeve. Ami had forced her heartbreak and loneliness to the back of her mind, and all so she could maintain her career, make something of herself…
As Usagi put it, she sacrificed the most precious things in her life for something that, while it certainly left her fulfilled and satisfied, never quite made her truly happy. But such was life, and that was the way things were.
To show her sympathy, Ami embraced her oldest and truest friend, even kissing her cheek. "I know. But we have to make do. I'm sure that one day, we'll all be together again. Just not anytime soon. Take care of yourself, dear Usagi." Ami smiled, even though deep down, she was hurting just as much as her friend. She was simply more accustomed to hiding it.
…
"Ironic, isn't it?"
"Hmm?"
Several days later, Usagi found herself at Sensoji temple, apathetically gazing at the huge Kaminarimon lantern, with a reflective Rei Hino by her side. The last time she had seen Rei in person had been months ago, when they took a vacation to Hokkaido together with Makoto. Since all five of the former Senshi were now working-class or career women, it was exceptionally rare for more than two of them to have the same open schedule; usually they had to set aside some time far in advance. While Usagi had certainly enjoyed herself (even when she tripped and fell down half the ski slope, or ran afoul those snow monkeys in the hot springs), she had wanted Ami and Minako to be there as well, if only as friends, if only for a few moments.
Not that she was ungrateful for this opportunity. Rei had set aside a few days of leisure for herself, so naturally the first person she thought to call was Usagi— and naturally, the first place she thought of as a meeting site was a famous (and nearby) temple. That was Rei, all right, and if Usagi wasn't mistaken, reminiscing on their surroundings had prompted the former miko to make her previous statement.
"Ironic," Rei said again, gesturing to her surroundings. "Me, being here… Me, taking this job, out of all others… Getting into politics, like I had sworn I wouldn't do, leaving the shrine, coming to a place like this, dressed like the kind of people I hate…" She laughed pitiably, resting her chin on her hand and her elbow on a railing as she gazed out, lavender eyes glassing over. Usagi glanced over at her and smiled softly.
"Why did you get into politics, anyway? To be closer to your father?"
"No, of course not. Perhaps to understand him, though. Perhaps to see if I could affect the system that turned him into…that. Maybe I deluded myself into thinking I could make a difference. All that studying, and that college scholarship, and that work-study program, and everything else I did, certainly didn't detract me from this path. And now I've created my own rut, and I have no choice but to follow it. I should be touring the world with Mina…"
"So why don't you?" Usagi said cheerily. Rei laughed sadly.
"Just like that, eh? Just drop everything, hop into the closest talent agency, show them what I've got, and be on the next plane to Paris? It's that easy?"
"Well, no, of course not— um, and actually, Mina's in Rio de Janeiro…"
"I know better, of course," she said, the false smile still stretched across her face, eyes closed as she accepted the truth of her position. "There are manga stories that detail such a transformation. A former something-or-other becomes the country's next top model, or the country's top model turns into a so-and-so to fulfill an even greater task… But fantasy and fact are completely different. Mina was born to be in that life. She was meant to be a model, just as she was meant to be Sailor Venus. It would've been impossible for her to be anything but. But as for me?" She snorted, wiping the smile off her face, glaring at the railing, at the world below, at the possibility she had given up, the life she had left. "Well, it turns out I am doing some small good for the country, so it's all right to trade in my dreams. And I can even understand my father a little. He tried making our lives better as well. But even though I vowed I'd never be like him, I've sacrificed a lot of people I've loved along the way. It's such an irony, don't you think?"
She allowed herself to cry, because she knew she could be vulnerable in front of Usagi— and because she knew Usagi wouldn't think any different of her. They instinctively drew close and held one another.
"Oh well," she tittered, smiling as she patted her friend's back. "If life isn't something to cry about, then it's definitely something to laugh at. And I suppose I am being a little silly. After all, nobody forced me into this position. I made it of my own volition. And once in awhile, I can go home with my head held high: proud, confident, pleased with myself, without any regrets. Hey," she said, as if noticing Usagi for the first time, "I'm sorry I rambled on like this. It's been too long since I've had someone to listen to my meaningless complaints. I suppose it's my way of getting revenge for all those times you forced us to put up with your whining."
"Hey," Usagi wailed. She and Rei both snickered. "You go right ahead and talk, Rei. It's been a long time since I've had someone to listen to."
They continued to hold each other as they watched the crowds surge around Sensoji. Time was meaningless. Eventually Rei drew a refreshing breath, and they parted.
"Don't think I called you out here just to vent. I owed you some major friend time and it's time I paid you back. Let me treat you to lunch."
"Famous last words," Usagi grinned. That drew a nice, hearty laughter out of Rei.
"It's okay, I'm given a nice salary. What about you? Are you being paid well?"
"More in personal satisfaction and experience than actual cash, but…meh, money's not that important. At least not until my rent's due, or it's laundry day, or when I run out of groceries…"
"The troubles of our society," she agreed. They found a local ramen vendor, and leaned in to simultaneously escape the day's heat and gorge themselves on the delicious perfumes wafting from the woks. Rei had a vegetable and tofu dish; Usagi favored seafood. They even ordered sake, and drank a toast to each other, bonds that never truly broke, careers that bewildered them, and their good-looking neighbor who winked at them before he left.
"He was a cutie," Usagi sang. Rei shook her head, scoffing.
"So was the gold ring on his left hand."
"Aw, dang it! There goes another one! How come everyone our age is already married? Did we miss some kind of party? Were there invitations given out? Even Makoto is…" Feeling sour, Usagi took a long slurp from her bowl, and added a sip or two of rice wine. Rei laughed softly and addressed her meal with more delicacy.
"Relax, dumpling-head, I'm in the same boat."
"No, you're just celibate."
"A miko must remain pure."
"I doubt it's by choice."
"Men these days don't meet my high standards."
"Or else you're just asexual." Rei flinched and glared at Usagi. Old memories of their previous (and numerous) spats flared up, and she was sorely tempted to get into another argument with her closest friend, if only to rekindle those long-forgotten times. But she was a grown woman now: mature, graceful, intelligent, composed. Rei still had a temper as hot as her namesake, but now she could control it.
"No. I'm attracted to people. But I never meet anyone who sparks anything more than a passing interest."
"I like how you said 'people' and not 'men'," Usagi grinned, poking her deviously. Rei brushed her off and drank more sake.
"You know what I mean."
"Aah, so you're like that too, eh? So my suspicions were correct after all…"
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Nothing, nothing," she sang, waving her hand. "Let's just say that out of the five of us, Minako and Makoto's choices came as no surprise, and Ami's did."
"Oh WHAT EV-ER!"
"Senator Hino!" she said in mock surprise. "Are you getting flustered? Perhaps you should yield the floor!"
"Okay, seriously, Usagi, that's enough." Usagi smiled and graciously backed off. To make up for it, she paid for another round of sake, and raised a toast to Rei.
"For you, my dear, in whatever you decide to do with your life, whether it's your career, your romances, or anything else that might come your way." She drank it all in one go; Rei smiled and raised her cup again.
"And to you, dumpling, who brings out the worst in me and seamlessly changes me for the better."
The day was wearing on as Rei drove Usagi home. At times she stole glances at her starry-eyed friend, who seemed oddly preoccupied with meditation. Usagi was staring out her window at the city, watching or thinking or else going into that blank Zen-like state of mind that Rei, even at her best, had rarely accomplished. She smiled warmly at Usagi, even though the other woman didn't see it.
"I'm glad we were able to do this. I had a lot of fun. We should do it again sometime."
No answer. Usagi must really be lost in her subconscious.
Or else she had fallen asleep.
"I don't know my schedule, but I can text you or email you something, let you know when I've got some time off. You just tell me yours and we'll arrange— "
"Rei, have you heard anything about that earthquake?" The interruption put Rei off guard; she took a moment to formulate an answer.
"Not really. There's been some effort on city hall's part to reconstruct the damage, put some of the homeless in shelters. It's taken attention off that park, unfortunately, but that can't be helped."
"You haven't heard anything strange about it?" Rei furrowed her brows in confusion. Something strange?
"Like what?"
"I don't know, it's just something I heard. A couple of geologists that were on-site said that it wasn't a usual quake; that it shouldn't have happened, or something like that."
Rei exhaled. "I honestly wouldn't know. I'm sorry I can't be of any help."
"None? None at all? Rei, you've always had these psychic episodes of yours, and I was thinking that maybe— "
"Usagi, I haven't had one of those in a long, long time. Since before the five of us went our separate ways, actually. At least nothing major— I've been able to find things I've lost, or figure out if one or two people were lying, but…"
"Could you…try?" The cold desperation in Usagi's voice sent chills down Rei's spine. She stopped the car at a light, glanced over, saw that her friend was still staring out the window…and that she was trembling.
"Usagi, what's this about?"
"Nothing!" she exclaimed, facing Rei with a smile. The expression didn't last. "I just…have a bad feeling." Rei leaned back, sighing in exasperation.
"Usagi, we've beaten back every threat the universe could have thrown at us. There's not going to be any more malevolent beings from the depths of space, or sentient rifts in time, or macro-organic trans-dimensional entities, or whatever it is you're afraid of. Those days have long since passed. We live in a real world now."
"I know."
"And it's time we put those thoughts aside and live as real people. We've earned that right, Usagi. We deserve it, more than anyone else."
Usagi said nothing. Rei sighed.
"For better or for worse. That's our world."
She let Usagi off, saw her to the door, hugged her, kissed her forehead. Usagi didn't want to let go at first.
"Wanna spend the night?"
"I have to get up early tomorrow."
"Call me, then." She stared up with great needy eyes. "Don't go silent again, Rei."
"I won't. I'll always be here when you call."
No you won't, she wanted to say…but she left it at that. Usagi closed the door, trapped in her prison of silence and isolation. She went to the couch, sighed, turned the TV on, fixed herself a crude meal, ate, showered, set her alarm, slept.
…
"Hey there! Somehow, you've reached my private cell phone, which is weird because I only give my number out to a VERY select group of people, but hey, who am I to deny a tenacious admirer? Unfortunately, you've caught me at a bad time, so I'm gonna have to take a message. Don't worry, I'll call you back real soon! Kisses!"
[To leave a message, press four. To redial— ]
Usagi pressed four. She didn't think Minako would be able to take this call.
"Hey, Mina, it's me, just calling to see how you're doing. I hear that you're in Rio now, and that sounds cool…so, um…gimme a call back and tell me all about it, okay? I mean, when you're not busy. Miss you lots, bye!"
Click. She put her phone away, leaned back, looked at the clock, wondering how much longer she'd be here today. Usagi's shift had ended over an hour ago, but Hari demanded that everyone put in some overtime, so here she was, wasting away with a mountain of paperwork. Usagi usually didn't mind putting in a few extra hours here and there, because police headquarters had now become her venue for social interaction. For all his grumpiness and cynicism, Asagiri was entertaining to talk to, and Hayashida was quickly becoming Usagi's friend. But today, unfortunately, they were both away on other duties, and the only other person Usagi interacted with was the chief herself, who had barred her doorway.
"I'm busy, come back later," the sign read. Usagi had snorted when she first saw it, but the door hadn't opened in the long hours since, and she was tired of reading and signing these meaningless documents. She took a deep breath and set herself to her task, glancing up at the clock as the minute hand slowly made its orbital journey. Some time passed before she allowed herself another break, so she got up to see if there was anything worth buying in the vending machine. As she settled for a small bag of nuts, she bumped into Hari, who looked oddly refreshed for someone who had spent the better part of a day in isolation.
"Hey, chief," she smiled. "Still at the old grind?"
"What are you still doing here, Tsukino? I thought I dismissed you already."
"Um, no, you didn't. You told me to stay on overtime."
"Right, but I also told you to…oh, wait, did I? I'm sorry, I must have forgotten. Tsukino, you're relieved for the day."
"I am?" Hari nodded.
"I'm sorry, I should have told you sooner. You've actually been working…" A quick glance at her wristwatch. "Forty-five minutes past the time I needed you. Well, I'll be sure to pay you for that, and the next time I ask everyone to work extra, you'll be exempt. Does that sound fair?"
"Uh, yes ma'am!" she beamed, even saluting. Hari dismissed her enthusiasm dryly.
"Very well, you may leave. I'll see you tomorrow, Tsukino. Good night."
"G'night, chief!" Usagi couldn't help but laugh and hum to herself as she walked back home, even though it was much darker than what she was accustomed to. She had been working and slaving for nearly an hour for nothing! Well, her next paycheck wouldn't be "nothing", and that exemption Hari promised certainly sweetened things. Of course, now Usagi had only a few short hours of freedom left, but since she usually didn't make plans on her work-days, she decided to just head home and treat herself to a nice dinner and movie.
Something in the distance caught her eye as she headed down an empty street. Shadows moved, and voices cried out. One of them shrieked; the other faded into footsteps, sprinting relentlessly away. A cry for help, for the police, prompted Usagi into action, and without even thinking, she took off in a sprint.
"Don't worry, ma'am! I'll get em'!" She passed a distressed woman around her age, and only heard that her purse had been stolen. A cliché, perhaps, but for once, there was a police officer around when someone needed them! Of course, Usagi never had anything to do with any actual crimes, and rarely went outside the office except to accompany other officers on their patrols, but would a technicality like that stop her? No! Once upon a time, she had been a paragon of justice, and all those old instincts kicked in as she sped down the sidewalk. She felt invigorated, renewed, like putting on a favorite coat, or a comfortable pair of shoes: she was in her natural element once more, and that criminal didn't stand a chance.
"Stop right there!" she shouted, catching sight of him. The man glanced back as he scurried away.
"Jeez, how the hell'd you catch up so quick? You a track star or something?"
Usagi wanted to say, No, I'm Sailor Moon, and in the name of the moon, I shall punish you!— or at least something clever and snappy, but instead, she lurched out and tackled him, pinning him to the ground and slapping cuffs over his wrists.
"Not quite! Just an off-duty police officer! Not exactly your lucky day, pal!" He cursed; she called for backup. By the time a squad car came to apprehend the felon, the victimized woman had finally caught up. She was out of breath, but relieved, and retrieved her purse with a grateful smile.
"Wow, imagine my luck! I didn't expect a police officer to be in the area! I'm really thankful for what you've done, Miss."
"No need for thanks, ma'am," Usagi laughed, turning to face the woman. "All part of my jo— wha-wha-WHUH?"
Usagi got her greatest shock of the day as she looked at the woman and recognized her.
"Naru?"
Author's note:
Sensoji is a real place, blah-blah-blah. I'm going to try and incorporate a lot of real-world locations into this story, but don't think I'm an expert on Japanese geography or tourism— I just have a handy pocket guide available. I realize that the story hasn't had any action yet— you're all still wondering when I'm going to unveil the villains, thus forcing our heroines to come out of retirement— but the slow process is a deliberate act on my part. It may seem redundant, but I really need to hammer home the idea that Sailor Moon no longer has a place in this world, and the Senshi have really turned into "normal" people. The steps will be gradual, but they will come, and I can guarantee they'll be worth the wait. Hopefully the gallery of antagonists I have planned will live up to the development.
The theory concerning the connection between Selene, the Greek moon goddess, and "Serena", the hilariously awful American dub of Usagi's name, is my own, though you have to admit, it can't be a coincidence. And in case it wasn't clear, in this continuity (if you want to call it that), the anime Sailor Moon was made in homage of the Senshi's real-life exploits, sort of like how the movie and TV show The Untouchables was made in homage of Elliot Ness and his team. Whether or not the Japanese public is aware of their real identities is something I'm going to work on later.