Chapter 3
Arizona's second evening in Seattle was much more restless than the first. Whereas before she was too jet-lagged to stay up worrying over her return, now she couldn't stop thinking about Callie and her baby. Not just any baby, either - a cute, squishy, happy baby that adored her mother and was obviously adored in return. It was hard for Arizona to feel anything other than warm and fuzzy towards Sofia when the infant was the spitting image of her former girlfriend - rounded cheeks, sparkling eyes; even her smile screamed Torres dynamo. Every single one of Arizona's weaknesses was rolled up into one pint-sized package. The odds were stacked against her.
Even so, the cuteness factor didn't soften the blow. Arizona berated herself for being so surprised that Callie had done exactly what she had always said she would do. It was why they had broken up in the first place, yet not once had she considered the possibility of Callie having a family before she came back to Seattle. The oversight made her feel pretty stupid in retrospect.
With her stomach in knots and the awkward confrontation playing on repeat in her mind, Arizona spent most of the night either staring at the ceiling or rolling between sides of the bed. The sun was starting to peek through the curtains when she finally realized that she wasn't capable of letting matters slide. If the next few months were going to be remotely bearable, their baggage had to be dealt with. There were only a finite number of hiding places inside the hospital and, at some point during her stay, Arizona was bound to run into Callie, probably when she least expected it and at a moment where making a fool of herself would be extremely inconvenient. She'd done a fine job of that last night as it was, there was no sense in making it worse.
When morning finally came, Arizona picked up the phone and hoped Callie hadn't changed her number in the last three years. Sifting the digits from the dregs of her mind only took a minute despite how long it had been since she'd last dialed them. As soon as the clock struck eight, she pressed send and waited for a response.
Four rings went by, then a groggy "Hello?" .
It was definitely Callie's voice, recognizable even when muffled by a pillow. The tone brought Arizona back to how disoriented her ex usually was at this time of the morning and she found herself smiling. There were many things that Callie Torres was; a morning person definitely not among them.
"Calliope, hi. It's Arizona. Robbins," she added, immediately cringing at how foolish she sounded. How many other Arizonas would Callie know? "I'm not calling too early, am I?"
Callie had woken out of a dead sleep and answered more on a surgeon's reflex than her own desire for conversation. Hearing Arizona's voice on the line was about the only reason she didn't tell the caller to shove it and hang up. "Hey," she managed through a heavy yawn, taking a quick peek at the alarm clock. All four numbers were blurry. "No, no, I'm...I'm awake. Really."
That probably would have come across more convincing if she hadn't sounded like she smoked six packs a day. An errant hand swiped across her mouth and she realized there was even drool. Perfect.
"Yeah, you sound like it," Arizona teased, chuckling into the phone. "I bet you've been up for hours ."
"Mm-hm," Callie said through another yawn. She brushed off the duvet, abandoning her warm cocoon and casting a quick glance to her left. Erica was fast asleep, so she stumbled out of the bedroom and pulled the door closed behind her, barely cracking an eye open for navigation. "Just give me a second, okay?"
"Sure thing." Arizona sat back and waited; she figured she owed Callie that much.
Callie stuck the phone in her shorts and padded into the kitchen to pour a cup of coffee. The wonders of timer-programmed coffee machines never ceased to earn her undying gratitude, especially on mornings like these.
With a mug in hand, she was able to settle on the couch without incident and wrapped herself up in her favorite afghan. She was still only functioning around the twenty-percent mark and the sheer relief of sitting down again nearly made her forget that she was on the phone in the first place.
"Okay, I'm here now," Callie began. "And I'm glad that you called, I felt bad after last night. That wasn't how I wanted you to find out about Sofia."
Arizona felt a rumbling in her stomach that she was positive had nothing to do with food. It was a relief to not be hung up on, but hearing that Callie actually wanted to speak to her was encouraging. "Me too. That wasn't exactly how I wanted to say 'hello', either."
Callie had no grand ideas on how to ease into the conversation, knowing that any other topic would be skirting around the whole 'I have a baby' thing. For such a tiny person, her daughter was turning into an over-sized elephant in the room - or her nursery, to be more precise. So she licked her lips and decided to tread carefully in the best interests of them both.
"Are you at work this morning?"
Arizona picked at the comforter draped across her lap, her back propped up against a mound of pillows. "No, I'm in my hotel. I've got a really long day ahead so I'm not going in until later this morning. I figure it'll give Dr. Stark a chance to finish his rounds and get preoccupied with something other than breathing down my neck." As a general rule, Arizona didn't talk poorly about her colleagues, but she'd had a rough first day and Callie had always been a person she could vent to.
"Oh yeah, he's a piece of work," Callie readily agreed. "I swear he's only in pediatrics because he gets his jollies making kids cry."
It was good to know that it wasn't just Arizona Stark seemed to despise. She thought about asking for more details on him but knew they could easily segway into small talk instead of getting into the important issues. That wouldn't clear anything up, so she switched the phone to her other ear and cut to the chase. "Look, I know this is probably weird, me calling you like this. I didn't know if I'd see you at work today and after last night…"
The situation was a little bizarre. "No, it's not weird at all," Callie lied. "Really, minimal on the weird."
"You're sweet," Arizona sighed, pulling the comforter under her arms. "Do you think we could talk? In person? I want to apologize for my behavior, maybe buy you breakfast or something."
"Arizona, you don't have to apologize," Callie started to protest.
"No, I do, really. I cornered you, and there was ranting, and then I probably looked like Sofia hit me with a mac truck and it was all very ugly," Arizona said.
"You were caught off guard."
That was one way of putting it. "I don't want things to be ugly while I'm here," she urged. "I'll buy you breakfast and then we can catch up properly. It doesn't even have to be today, obviously you've got a kid now, so it's not like I just expect you to drop everything. Whenever it fits in your schedule."
Callie took a second to sort out her thoughts. If someone had asked her three days ago whether she'd be having breakfast with Arizona again, she would have laughed, but now that the opportunity was here it was pretty hard to turn down. There were also complications that came along with it - like the whole issue of what Erica would think. Callie wasn't oblivious to the tension at work and her girlfriend's involvement in it.
Still, in her mind, there was no rule that said breakfast with ex-girlfriends was forbidden, not if it was innocent. It was the least sexy meal of the day - no candles, no fancy outfits, no muss, no fuss. She could show up in her pajamas and they could sit in a room full of people with screaming children and eat bagels. Where was the harm in that?
Callie did her best to ignore the queasy feeling in her belly and cast an eye at the bedroom door. Waking Erica now to ask for permission would only make things more awkward, especially after what Cristina had witnessed in the boardroom, and Callie couldn't say no and expect the rest of Arizona's visit to go smoothly. Avoiding each other was only going to make things worse for everyone involved, Erica included, so she made the executive decision to answer now and explain things later.
"I think today could work. It would be nice to catch up like normal people, no skulking involved."
"No skulking, that's a promise," Arizona grinned.
"And I like to eat, so that's a bonus."
"I like to eat too. Imagine that."
"Also, you kind of woke me up on a morning I don't have to go in," Callie drawled. By now she wasn't trying to talk herself into it anymore, she was already on board with the plan.
"I guess I owe you pancakes," Arizona relented. "Don't worry, I'm buying."
Eating pancakes with Arizona shouldn't have made Callie grin as widely as it did, but she couldn't help herself. She was moving through the jittery phase and leaning towards excited. "We could meet up at work if you're pressed for time."
Arizona knew what can of worms that would open. Health care professionals in Seattle talked more than health care professionals anywhere else in the world from her experience. "I think it would be a good idea if we went somewhere else. It would cut down on the number of people spying by at least half."
Callie let out a short laugh. "Good point. Where do you want to meet?"
"How about that little café on the corner of 5th avenue you love?"
Callie took a long sip of coffee before answering. "That might be difficult seeing as it burned down last year."
"Oh." Arizona frowned. "Wow, that sucks. Your bagel consumption practically kept them in business."
Callie readjusted her position and pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders. "Stories swirled about what actually happened - meth lab gone wrong, arson, poorly extinguished cigarette, etcetera. I don't really know what the verdict was."
Arizona's brow rose. "What about a plain old grease fire? The hash browns alone needed a bowl to swim around in."
"Done in by shredded potatoes. The owner's face must be so red right now."
Arizona chuckled and tucked some stray hairs behind her ear. "I'm oh-for-one, so you should probably pick the place."
Callie contemplated their options. Food was no game in the Torres family. "How about the diner on 12th and Vine? I think it's called 'The Morning Cup' or something like that. Sound okay?"
Arizona released a long hum and pretended to ponder her options. "Depends. Are there bagels?"
"Yes, Arizona. I think bagels are a staple."
"Then I'm in." Arizona threw off the covers and climbed from the bed. It felt as though a boulder had been surgically removed from her shoulders for the first time in a week. "I need to grab a quick shower and cab it down there. The rental place screwed me over and they won't have a car for the next few days, plus I need to fix the rats nest on my head."
Callie remembered well how much she liked ruffled-looking Arizona first thing in the morning. She kept her mouth shut for both their sakes. "Me too. I'll drop Sofia off at daycare on my way over."
"You can bring her if you want," Arizona suggested. "Really, I don't mind."
"She doesn't do so well with obnoxiously loud places," Callie said. "Besides, she's barely seven months old and she's already made friends she likes more than me. She'll be fine."
Arizona didn't let herself worry whether Callie was keeping Sofia at a distance or not, that was her decision. She moved into the bathroom to get a quick look at herself in the mirror and tried not to cringe. It would be nice to look presentable for today of all days. Her entire reflection would need to be rectified before she showed her face in public.
"Meet you there in an hour?" She dumped out her toiletries bag and started digging around for the essentials.
Try as she might, Callie couldn't stop herself from beaming. "Yeah, that sounds great. I'll see you then." She clicked off the call and slumped into the cushions.
Well, that conversation hadn't gone too-
"Who was calling this early?"
Erica's voice just about did Callie in; at the bare minimum, it shaved seven or eight minutes from her life. She whipped around and tried not to look too guilty, because technically she had no reason to be.
"What? No one! Why?" she demanded, trying to quell the rising panic in her gut. Erica's face was always neutral in the morning and it was making it impossible to tell how long she had been listening.
Erica didn't seem fazed; she shot Callie a weird look and went for the coffee machine. "It's just a question, Torres. Not an inquisition."
Callie cursed her complete and utter inability to act cool in times of need. "No one," she repeated, only she realized that sounded even more suspicious than giving an answer in the first place. "Er, work. Someone from work. About...stuff."
"Ah, stuff. Of course." Erica replaced the coffee pot and faced Callie again. Her stare continued to be passive yet unnerving.
Callie felt herself start to sweat, which guaranteed that Erica was soon to see right through her. "So," she began in the hopes of keeping that from happening. It was easier to draw things out while she tried to find the most political way to bring up her morning agenda. "What are your plans for today? Cool surgeries, annoying patients, paperwork we can use to start a bonfire?"
Erica's gaze had dropped to the mess of papers left on the counter while she sipped her coffee. "The usual. Get walked all over by Richard and the Board, try to pretend I'm not furious that they brought in some inexperienced, stu-"
The insult rolled to a stop at the ball of her tongue. Erica was barely able to squash down a flurry of insults she had been about to unleash on Robbins, registering the expression on Callie's face and suddenly remembering her audience.
"Some...random doctor to mess with my patients," she finished instead. Robbins was hardly 'random', but deep in her gut Erica knew it would play against her if she bashed her colleague at every turn, especially in front of Callie. Right now she couldn't afford for anything else to be ripped away from her.
Callie stared into her dwindling beverage like it could offer some sort of answer to her dilemma. "Listen, Erica, about the whole Arizona thing-"
The mere mention of the pediatric surgeon's name caused Erica to bristle. "I don't want to talk about her," she said flippantly. "I'm sure she thinks that I'm ready to walk off the case and leave her to it, but I'll be damned if I don't keep an eye out for my patient. Richard wants her here, fine, but if push comes to shove, I will be in that OR every single time Robbins picks up a scalpel. Mark my words."
Whatever confidence Callie had been stockpiling was already beginning to crumble. "Okay, I need a shower," she said in a rush, suddenly abandoning the plan all together and struggling to untangle herself from the couch. At no point had she actively planned on hiding this thing from Erica but telling her now seemed like a horrible idea. The best she could hope for was that it was just a professional disagreement and both sides would suck it up for the sake of world peace, but right now Callie didn't think it was a good time to test that theory. She just wanted a simple breakfast with no strings attached or jealous barbs getting hammered into her skull.
Erica remained stationary while her girlfriend made a dash for the bedroom. Ultimately she decided that Callie was just in one of her strange moods and running on fumes, since this whole incident had to be equally as weird for her. Erica had too much on her own plate to worry what other people were doing with their time, so she went about getting ready for the day ahead and wiped Callie's oddball behavior from her mind.
#*#*
By some miracle Arizona managed to shower, dress, preen in the mirror, and still get to the cafe first. It was a perk of being a morning person - even on short notice, she could usually be on time. Three years ago, Callie struggled with everyday tasks if her brain was still in slumber mode. Arizona used to think the grumpy panda bear act was cute and she couldn't help but wonder if that's the version of Callie she would be greeted with this morning. Then again, newborns weren't famous for sleeping in.
The venue was teeming with people so she secured them a table by the window, somewhere they could talk without being overhead, while not secluding themselves suspiciously in a corner. There was enough space between the second chair and the window for a baby carrier if Callie chose to bring her daughter along. The location was perfect for a semi-awkward reunion of sorts. Now all she could do was wait.
Nerves got the better of her and in less than ten minutes she had already inhaled two large cups of coffee. Arizona alternated between watching the door and staring out the window, keeping an eye out while trying not to look conspicuous. The lack of food straight lined every last drop of caffeine into her bloodstream so that by the time Callie arrived, her leg was jack hammering away under the table.
Arizona spotted her first and jumped up, waving, then unceremoniously banged her hip on the table and stumbled out of her chair. Callie saw her, grinned, and dodged through the crowded interior of the cafe.
In no time at all, they were standing two feet apart, staring at one another. The butterflies in Arizona's gut went haywire.
"Hi," Callie stated after a brief pause. After her Houdini act the other day, she figured she owed Arizona the first word. It wasn't the most original choice phrasing but it was better than catatonic silence.
"Hey," Arizona echoed, working to keep her voice upbeat but normal. Her confidence plateaued there; she was hovering in some strange place between wanting to hug Callie and being completely unsure if they were friendly enough to do that. Callie seemed to be having the same difficulties as she stutter-stepped forward at the same time as Arizona before jerking to an awkward halt.
Arizona forced out an awkward laugh and felt her cheeks blush. She met Callie's eyes and subtly lifted a brow in question.
It was Callie who cracked the first smile at the sheer absurdity of it all. Screw it, she thought, and tugged Arizona into a friendly embrace. "It's good to see you," she spoke into her ear, raising her voice to be heard over the noise of the diner.
Arizona finally relaxed and allowed herself to return the hug with enthusiasm. "It's good to see you too," she murmured, rubbing a hand across her back. Callie's arms gave Arizona an extra little squeeze before they separated again.
Now that the re-introduction was over with, Arizona slid into her seat and gestured for Callie to do the same. "Sorry about the early phone call. I didn't wake Sofia up, did I?"
Callie shrugged off her coat and sat across from her. The familiar scent of Arizona's shampoo still lingered in her nose, some sort of shea butter and coconut mix. It was oddly comforting. "Sofia sleeps better than I do most nights. I dropped her off at daycare and thirty seconds later she was right back in nap mode."
"She is definitely your kid," Arizona chuckled. "I always marveled at your ability to sleep in the most uncomfortable on-call rooms."
A server arrived to take their order. "Can I get you something to drink?" he asked Callie.
She perused the front page of the menu. "I'll have coffee and orange juice to start."
He scribbled down a quick note and shifted his attention to Arizona. "A third cup for you, miss?"
Callie's eyebrow shot up. 'Three?' she mouthed in the blonde's direction.
Arizona nodded sheepishly and nudged her mug over. "Yes, please." She waited until he poured the coffee before dumping three sugars and one cream into the mix.
Not for the first time, Callie mused over Arizona's coffee habit and how she was still the only person that rivaled her own addiction. They would be completely different people if the coffee bean industry broke down and cut off their daily supply. In that nightmare scenario, nobody was safe.
She cracked open the menu and skimmed it, more as a formality than to actually make a decision. "I'll have the three cheese omelet with extra crispy bacon, stuffed hash browns and brown toast. Extra cheese in the omelet."
"No pancakes?" Arizona asked.
"Another time. This feels more like an eggs and bacon day," Callie said.
Arizona had to agree and she ordered the same, then waited until the server left before speaking again. "Three years go by and you're still eating the same Saturday morning breakfast. I like it." There were days when she used to make an omelet and bacon for Callie when they shared a day off. Arizona was always the first one awake, so by the time breakfast was served and the coffee was fresh, Callie was just crawling out of bed. It had been a pleasant, symbiotic part of their relationship - Callie got fed and Arizona got to spoil her. She missed the simplicity of those days.
"I had to choose a manageable breakfast back then," Callie said airily. "Your culinary skills were limited and I really didn't want my kitchen to burn down."
Arizona's mouth fell open. "Hey!"
She looked so affronted that Callie let out a bark of laughter. "Oh please, don't give me that look. You know if your cooking was that terrible I would have said something. I loved it, I'm just bugging you."
"Not feeling any better here," Arizona pouted. Even so, Callie wasn't too far off - it was no secret that she wasn't exactly Martha Stewart in the kitchen. Still, Arizona liked to think that she could make some mean breakfast food when the situation depended on it. Eggs were pretty hard to screw up.
The mood at their table was much lighter than it had started off, but now that the initial pleasantries were over, Arizona's mind drew a blank. There were so many things to talk about, she just couldn't decide where to begin. Suddenly she couldn't remember what she normally did with her hands, so she just kind of folded them in her lap and let her leg start bouncing again.
Callie calmly sipped her coffee and held Arizona's gaze. She was firm in her decision to let Arizona get in the first word. After the Sofia-bomb the night before, the ball was in her court.
The staring contest went on for almost half a minute. Arizona watched her ex-girlfriend's mouth twitch up in that little half smirk she was famous for. There was no way she was getting out of this one easily, so, drawing up the courage to speak, she leaned forward and began. "Let me just get this apology out of the way - I am so sorry for the way I reacted last night. I got kind of worked up thinking you were avoiding me and I made a rash decision to corner you before I could think it through."
"You did kind of jump out of no where," Callie agreed, smiling all the same. "It's okay, though. It kept me on my toes for the rest of the night. Nobody else managed to sneak up on me."
Colour flushed Arizona's cheeks. "Coming back here was...big, and I didn't have a lot of time to process it before jumping on the plane. And I definitely had no idea you were a mom, so I wigged out a little and made a fool of myself. It wasn't my finest moment."
Callie swirled the straw around her orange juice. "You didn't call. I would've told you if you'd called."
"I know, but it had been a long time. I didn't know if I could call."
Callie could understand that; it wasn't as if she had picked up the phone in the last three years, either. Granted, she'd thought Arizona was still off somewhere in Africa saving orphans, and she didn't even know if Malawi had an area code. "It's okay, Arizona, really. I get it."
Arizona ducked her eyes, using an excuse to add more sugar to her coffee. "Sofia's gorgeous, Calliope. Congratulations, I mean that."
As with every time she thought of her daughter, Callie's features lit up. "She is pretty spectacular, isn't she?"
"A chip off the old block," Arizona teased. Callie did that eyebrow thing again and suddenly Arizona found herself backtracking. "Not that you're old o-or look like a block or anything. I mean that she's beautiful, like you were beautiful. Are beautiful."
Oh, hell.
Arizona turned beet red and covered her face with both hands. "Just shoot me, please. I'm drowning here." Callie's snickering came through loud and clear from across the table . "It's not funny," she mumbled, sliding her hands away. "Everything is just so weird right now."
Callie was thoroughly enjoying the classic Arizona montage. For some reason, Arizona could be articulate and firm with the rest of mankind, but when it came to the two of them, she tripped over her own tongue much easier. "Mortified is a good look for you," she pointed out. "If you're here for a while, remind me to make you blush more often."
Arizona just shook her head. "It comes naturally when your special talent is sticking your foot in your mouth. I think I forgot how to be social."
"Trust me, that's a feeling I know well," Callie lamented. "I blame the twenty-one hours a day of baby talk. And it's not like I didn't make an ass of myself by running away on you three times yesterday, so I think we're even as far as apologies go. Let's just...start talking and see where it takes us."
That sounded like the smartest idea either of them had come up with in days. Arizona wanted desperately to get back to a subject she wouldn't embarrass herself over, so she jumped at the chance. "Do you have any pictures of Sofia?" she asked. It was a genuine request; she wanted to know more about Callie's daughter and their life these days.
Callie produced her iPhone and handed it over, allowing Arizona to scroll through an endless number of baby pictures. "There are about four-hundred on there. Don't feel obligated to go through every single one, I'm just one of those moms that takes a picture every time she sneezes. They need a Baby AA or something."
Arizona didn't mind in the least; if ever there was a kid she wanted to know more about, it would be Callie's. There were even a few shots of her holding a newborn Sofia in her arms moments after labor. Callie griped about how half-dead and gross she looked, but Arizona thought she was stunning. There was a light in Callie's eyes as she gazed down at the bundle wrapped in her arms. It suited her well.
"She's beautiful," Arizona repeated, flipping to the next picture sequence. A photo of Callie, Sofia and Erica together popped up.
Callie felt a stab of guilt for shoving that one in Arizona's face, even if it was inadvertent. "That was at the pier a couple of weeks after she was born. It was...windy. Hence the hair."
Arizona glanced across the table. "You guys look happy."
"Yeah, it was a good day," Callie said casually, choosing not to offer a definitive answer. "Sofia's everything I hoped for and more. I have zero regrets. My uterus makes awesome babies."
Arizona chewed on her bottom lip and contemplated the questions floating around in her head. "Erica isn't exactly who I would peg for the maternal type," she said carefully, handing the phone back. "I don't mean that as a slant, it's just surprising, that's all. My impression was that she didn't even like kids. For patients, I mean. It's not like we ever talked about her personal life before I left."
Callie took a long moment to figure out how she wanted to explain things. Technically, it was none of anyone's business, but she found herself wanting to be clear for Arizona's sake. Their arrangement wasn't exactly orthodox and avoiding confusion would be for the better.
"She's not. A kid person, I mean. She likes Sofia, she helps out, but I don't think motherhood was ever something she contemplated before."
Arizona tilted her head, confused.
It was Callie's turn to start jiggling her leg under the table. "Erica and I have only been together for a little over a year. We started seeing each other when I was five months pregnant with Sofia."
The revelation caused Arizona's brow to shoot up. "Oh?"
Callie shrugged and picked at a napkin on the table. "She was just a friend for a really long time. A good friend who was helping me through this huge, life-changing decision I was making. Then one thing led to another, and now here we are. I'm a mom and Erica's my…well, we're together and we're seeing where things take us, if this is something we both want for the long term."
Arizona tried to make sense of what Callie was getting at without toeing any boundaries. Curiosity and masochism prodded her into asking anyway. "So she's not - I mean, Sofia's not her…?"
Callie could count on four hands the number of times she'd had to explain this to the people in her life. Usually it pissed her off, but with Arizona, the intent was harmless. It was a valid question.
"It's complicated," she allowed after a lengthy pause. There was no part of her not crawling with fire ants right now; explaining the inner working of her relationship with Erica to Arizona seemed backwards, warped. But 'complicated' was too vague for her taste, so she thought back to how things had gone down and tried to describe it without going into too much detail for Arizona's sake.
#*#*
12 months ago:
"Erica, we can't do this," Callie argued, yet the stumble-step towards the bedroom continued. Lips ghosted along her neck and she tangled a fist into blonde curls, guiding Erica's mouth to crash against her own. Her mind and her body were on completely different wavelengths right now; one resistant, one desperate, both confused. Neither of them were making any sense.
"Why not?" Erica forced herself to pull away for clarity's sake, waiting for an answer while her fingers continued their slow crawl up Callie's side.
There was an ache in the pit of Callie's stomach that came after years of intense, debilitating loneliness, and it intensified with such a tender touch. Changing the status quo had the potential to be disastrous, yet she couldn't take her hands off of the woman in her bedroom. This very moment lodged her somewhere between a rock and a horny place - the latter possibly due to pregnancy hormones. It had been a long, cold year, and the only person she could count on during that time was suddenly kissing her neck again.
"You know why," Callie finally relented. She took the step to untangle herself from Erica again and moved back a few paces, putting some safety distance between them. "It's not like things aren't incredibly complicated here."
"Complicated, yes. Impossible, no." Erica stepped into the space and reached out to comb her fingers through Callie's hair. "We've been doing this dance for how long? I've missed you, I have feelings for you. I don't want to pretend that you mean just as much to me as Bailey or Hunt. You know it's more than that."
Little bits of Callie's resolve were being chipped away, one sentence at a time. The ache in her gut intensified and Callie groaned before sagging onto the edge of the bed, waiting for Erica to join her side by side.
"I'm pregnant," she stated again, just to be clear. "Like, really pregnant. You know this, you've been the one holding my hand through all the freak-outs and what-ifs and reminding me not to go nuclear on the interns when they open their stupid mouths and idiotic questions come flying out." She shot Erica a nervous glance. "Plus, you're a doctor, so I'm assuming you know that the end game here is a baby coming out of my vagina. That's sort of a permanent thing these days."
Erica cracked a smile at Callie's ability to describe things in ways that only she could. Her fingers slipped through the hand resting next to hers. "I know. I've enjoyed it so far, I have to say. You get more neurotic with every panic attack."
Callie returned the gesture weakly and flexed her grip. "I don't know what we're doing. What are we doing?" Silence pinballed around the room, all the while with Erica watching her.
"I'm not kidding myself here," Erica said after a moment. "I still don't know that I'll ever be ready for some kid to start calling me 'mom'. But I do know that I love you, and that being a part of that equation in some way might not be all that bad. Maybe there's a way to make this work, if it's something you want."
"Let me guess, a complicated way?" Callie mused.
"Probably." Erica raised their clasped hands to her lips and pressed a firm kiss to her paramour's skin. "This child will be the most important part of your life from now until forever, I'm not blind. You are an incredibly brave woman to make this journey alone and I know you'll be amazing at it. But maybe you don't have to be completely alone."
Callie's uncertainty never went away but her resistance had already started packing its bags. They had been through so much in the past year, it had to count for something. Maybe she owed them this, to at least try and figure it out. Becoming a mother didn't mean she had an obligation to be alone. She cared about Erica.
"So, we see where it goes?" she asked skeptically. "I just...have a baby, and we date and act like everything's normal?"
Erica started to smile. Maybe they were a little crazy, but she was starting to like that about them. "Well, I'd like to think we're more than just 'dating', but yes, essentially. We wait and we see where it goes." She ducked her face to catch Callie's wandering eye. "Okay?"
There was only one way to find out. "Okay," Callie echoed, and the rest of the night was theirs.
#*#**
A blanket of silence muffled the other patrons of the diner, drowning out everything around Callie and Arizona. Arizona ended up focused on a speck of dried jam that was smudged close to Callie's hand; she wondered how long it had been there and how often this place cleaned its tables. Maybe she should have paid more attention before choosing their seats.
Callie studied the far-off look in the other woman's eyes. She tilted her head down and tried to figure out how deeply Arizona was buried in her thoughts. "You okay in there?"
All it took was Callie's voice to bring Arizona rushing back to the present. She blinked hard and shook the fog away before it could envelop her again. "Yeah, sorry. Too much coffee, I think it's short-circuiting my motor functions." She flashed Callie a quick smile and raised the lukewarm mug to her lips. "It sounds nice, everything with Erica. Like things worked out for the better."
Callie didn't really know how that sat with her. "You seem surprised. Beyond the baby thing, I mean."
Arizona held the coffee mug up again in an attempt to buy herself more time to calm down. It felt pushy to keep talking about Erica, but now Callie was the one pushing the questions. "I thought you two were already together when I left Seattle," she admitted only when Callie wouldn't stop staring at her.
"Really? No, not at all," Callie replied, confused as to where Arizona got that from. "We were only friends for more than a year after you left. She was there for me through a whole lot of stuff, we were close, but nothing happened for a long time."
Of course, that was leaving out the part where a drunken come-on six weeks after Arizona left had Erica spell it out to Callie plain and simple - she would be nobody's rebound. That one embarrassment had rendered Callie ashamed and too afraid to ever broach the subject again - until Erica decided to make a move more than twelve months later.
"She's good with Sofia," Callie added for clarification. The last thing she wanted to do was undermine the roll Erica did have in her daughter's life. "Her baby talk needs some serious work, though. That part I mostly take care of."
"Aw. You're a big softie," Arizona teased, poking Callie with her foot. She wanted to shake the growing discomfort in her belly and the best way to do that was to keep the ball rolling. A nearby server caught her eye around that time and appeared with more coffee in hand, which helped matters.
"Are you sure you should be drinking that?" Callie asked skeptically as she watched Arizona's fourth mug fill to the rim. "I don't remember you ever being this saturated with the stuff."
"My sleep schedule is a mess," Arizona admitted, wasting little time before drinking half of it in one go. She scalded her tongue but didn't let that stop her. "Between the three hour time difference and the stress of running a major medical trial with a mile of red tape around it, I haven't slept much in two nights."
"That's healthy," Callie snorted.
"Gotta keep the blood flowing. This does the trick." Arizona tipped her mug in a mock salute.
Callie abandoned her plans to scold Arizona when their food finally arrived, and not a second too soon. They needed a detour from talking about her off-kilter love life because no matter how much time had passed, Callie didn't feel like she would ever be ready to talk about it with Arizona. It was too strange.
Her stomach was busy imitating a large, angry feline by now and the whole restaurant probably knew how hungry she was. An omelet made by somebody that wasn't her and didn't require doing dishes afterward smelled just as good as it looked, so she picked up her utensils and dove in.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the table, Arizona was still removing her knife and fork from their wrappings. She meticulously folded her napkin down over her right thigh and scooted forward in her seat, proceeding to breathe in the delicious scent of the meal and savour it before so much as a crumb landed in her mouth. She took a normal sized bite and glanced across the table to witness Callie shoveling in her food.
"Wow," she commented, a teasing smirk forming when Callie looked up, eyes wide and a mouth full of eggs. "Don't swallow the fork, Torres. CPR is always so awkward when it comes to exes."
Callie froze, taking care to swallow before jumping to her own defense. "I'd be more worried about the eggs solidifying halfway down your windpipe. Something's bound to expire before you finish."
Arizona lifted another dainty forkful and made a show of eating it slowly. "Just remember what I said when Dr. Hunt is trying to dislodge a spoon from your windpipe."
Callie narrowed her eyes, unamused. "Just eat your food, smartass. Your eggs are gonna get cold." She shook her fork in Arizona's direction, causing a piece of egg to fly off and land on the table.
Arizona grinned and reached for the bacon that was supposed to be on her plate, only to spot an offending pile of breakfast sausage in its place. She hated sausage, a long-running joke that Callie probably had yet to let go of.
Around the same time, Callie poked at her toast when she realized they had smothered a significant amount of blueberry jam on it. She despised blueberry jam, it lacked the actual taste of blueberries and the texture was always off. Without looking up, she extended the toast to Arizona's plate and at the same time received two breakfast sausages on her own. They had done it probably a thousand times before and neither of them blinked during the normality of the exchange.
Arizona hid a smile when she realized what they had done after, then grabbed the toast for a healthy bite. "So, what have you been up to for the last two years and nine months? Besides having the world's most adorable baby and continuing to lead the field of orthopedic surgery into the future."
Callie bit the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning like an idiot. Somehow, whenever Arizona brought up Sofia, she couldn't stop the giddiness from flowing. Those stupid maternal hormones were still working her over, even seven months after birth. "Not much, really. Sofia's taken up most of my time, so between her and work, I stay pretty busy. I don't get too many nights to go out drinking and dancing on bar tops anymore. Guess I'm a grown-up now."
"Now it's wine in your pajama bottoms and falling asleep at nine o'clock," Arizona teased. "Welcome to the old timers' club." She raised her juice glass in salute. "Is it everything you'd hoped it would be?"
Callie released a sigh. "When I look at her, half of the time I still can't believe she's mine," she said quietly. "It's like I actually made something that didn't fall apart or get shoved into the back of a closet when company comes to stay."
"I should hope not," Arizona laughed. "From my experience in peds, teenagers that grow up in broom closets tend to feel resentment when they get older. Some of them even become wizards and demand they go to boarding school."
Callie started laughing. "You are still such a dork."
"Hey, my Harry Potter themed Halloween in 2009 was epic. Just ask my patients, they loved it."
"Mm-hm," Callie smirked, shaking her head. "Like I said, dork."
There was little to take offense from, Arizona saw the twinkle in Callie's eyes that said she was kidding. Besides, dorks were in these days. Callie used to love her nerdy moments.
As much as she loved talking to death about her daughter, Callie wanted to transition into Arizona and her work at some point, and this seemed like the opportunity. It would be easy to take over the whole conversation with stories about how cute Sofia was when she giggled or the time she'd almost lost her behind the couch when she was learning to crawl. Something told her that Arizona wouldn't mind, it was just the kind of person she was, but this was about more than Sofia. Before she could ask, however, Arizona beat her to it.
"I heard through the grapevine that your cartilage research is finally getting a trial," Arizona started. "A surgeon I met at the clinic on rotation worked with Cheng a few years ago. He said it was a really big deal in the ortho community, so I guess that means a second congratulations is in order. You're kicking my ass here on the list of accomplishments."
Callie's lips tweaked up slightly. Her research was her other baby, be it less cute and a little more high maintenance. "We're still in the early, early stages of development and it's still pending approval on a lot of fronts. We're not completely green-lit yet, but my fingers are crossed. It's going well."
"I can't wait to read about it once you publish," Arizona agreed. "It's pretty cool. And to think, I was there when it first happened. I'm a part of history." She took another bite of eggs and proudly lifted her head to meet Callie's eyes.
Callie found that she couldn't hold Arizona's gaze for very long before every last nerve in her upper body started to get twitchy. She resorted to scarfing down the last of her breakfast and focused on the swirls of yolk in her plate. It was enough of a cover that she regained her centre of gravity and was able to look up again.
"What about you?" she asked, dumping a packet of sugar into her coffee, as though that would help solve her jitters. "I mean, you were in Africa saving babies and building a surgical program. How was it?"
Arizona finished off the remnants of her coffee and resisted the urge to order more. Enlarging the hole in her stomach this early in her trip was probably a bad idea. "It was pretty amazing. Different, of course. So different. The Carter-Madison foundation has really made a huge difference in the community." She dabbed at her mouth with a napkin and pushed her empty plate away. "They talked about pouring more money in to expand to a second location, just across the border in Zambia. There's another area with no medical care nearby and the government is willing to co-operate under the right circumstances."
"Sounds like the program is a huge success," Callie said. "That's amazing."
"It's been really great, I feel really good about it," Arizona agreed. There were few things in her life that she was extremely proud of but this clinic and its results were definitely at the top.
"So are you back for good?" Callie hedged. There wasn't really a sneaky way for her to slip this into the conversation as far as she could tell. "Or are you taking a break for the trial, or…?"
Arizona shrugged and worked out the best explanation she could think of. "I've got a really great team of surgeons rotating through on a monthly basis. I fly out once every two or three months myself to keep an eye on things and help out. Between the clinic and Hopkins, I haven't had much of a life since Christmas. It's a lot of back and forth between continents. I'm not too sure how things will go beyond the new year."
The Christmas reference gave Callie pause. She did the math in her head and ended up scrunching her brow in confusion. "You've been at Hopkins for nine months already? Did you come back from Malawi early or do I just really suck at numbers?"
The question tripped Arizona up and for a moment she didn't know what to say. There were a host of complicated, painful answers to that and she didn't want to put a damper on the visit, not when things were starting to go smoothly.
"Arizona?" Callie lowered her fork when she saw the sudden change in her ex-girlfriend's demeanor. Her whole expression had darkened.
Arizona had to work through how she wanted to answer. In the end she decided that the simplest explanation was probably the easiest, even if it was just as hard to say out loud now as it had been nine months ago.
"I was there for two years," she started to explain. "I planned on staying for the third because things were going so well, but…" She trailed off again and dropped her eyes. "My dad died in December, so I flew back for the funeral and to help out with the arrangements and stuff. With my mom all alone, I ended up staying. It was better for both of us."
Callie suddenly felt like she was going to be sick, which wouldn't have been a pretty picture since she had just consumed a massive amount of food. "Oh, god, I'm so sorry, Arizona," she whispered, her whole heart going out to her.
As with every time she thought about her father and how much she missed him, Arizona felt a stab of pain in the centre of her chest. "My mom was having a really hard time coping with how sudden it all was, and then Hopkins offered me a spot when they found out I was looking, so she moved to Baltimore with me. She has her own place but she's close by. We keep an eye on each other."
Callie only hesitated for the briefest of seconds before reaching across the table to cover Arizona's hand. "I had no idea or I would've called," she said softly. "I'm so sorry for your loss."
Arizona forced a smile through the prickling behind her eyes. It was still extremely raw when she thought about how much she missed her dad, but she was able to keep it in check after months of practice. "Thanks, Callie. That means a lot."
Knowing how close Arizona was with her parents, Callie could only imagine how difficult it must have been for her to go through that, especially when she was half way across the world. God knew she had issues with her own parents - and those weren't going away anytime soon - but she couldn't fathom losing one of them so suddenly. It gave her the chills.
She squeezed her hand comfortingly around Arizona's. "What happened, if you don't mind me asking? I would totally understand it you don't want to talk about it, I'm just so shocked. I mean he's The Colonel with a capital 'T'."
"He was The Colonel," Arizona agreed, allowing herself to smile. There was no better way to sum him up than that. Losing him was still fresh; she missed him on a daily basis and regretted being away in Africa for so long, but she couldn't change that now. They had constantly talked about her parents coming for a visit before the three year period was up, it just didn't happen in time. A huge part of her still wished her father had been able to see the clinic and everything she had done with the program.
"He had a heart attack," she replied after a long breath. "It was quick from what they told me. Thank god my mother didn't find him, he was out with some friends." Arizona couldn't handle the thought of what that would have been like for her or her mom. "She's doing better these days, she just misses him like crazy. They'd been together since they were in their early twenties. I can't even imagine how she feels right now. I don't think I ever want to."
Callie offered her a sympathetic smile. "I'm glad you two have each other out east. It makes me feel better knowing that you're not alone."
The whole thing was still vivid in Arizona's mind, receiving the phone call out of the blue, struggling for four days to get back home. During that time, her poor mom had been by herself to deal with the initial fallout. It still bothered Arizona on a certain level that she hadn't been around when it happened. Those four days were awful for both of them.
"I hadn't seen him for almost a year," she said, her voice dropping significantly in volume. "I was planning to fly home and visit last Christmas. Probably should have made it Thanksgiving, knowing how it..."
Callie hummed and turned Arizona's fingers over in her own. Her thumb traced a soothing pattern along her palm and she watched Arizona's expression fall again. "I don't even know what to say," she admitted. "I know how incredibly lame that is, but I just...I'm so sorry. I wish I could've been there for you. I wish I could say something to make it hurt less. If there ever is anything you need, here or in Maryland, I promise I'm here now."
"Thank you," Arizona repeated, offering her a tiny smile. Her fingers looped through Callie's and this time she gave them a reassuring squeeze. "Robbins women are survivors. We're hanging in there."
There was no doubt in Callie's mind that those two could make it through anything. Barbara Robbins was the sweetest woman you would ever meet and yet she kept her husband in line for over forty years, which spoke volumes of her tenacity. She had raised her daughter to be the same way.
Callie wanted to tell Arizona how proud her father would have been of her accomplishments, that anyone who had ever seen them together knew how much that man loved his little girl. The words formed in her mind but failed to make it out of her mouth - Arizona had probably heard it all from people more important than her. There was no need to cut open a wound that had already begun to heal.
With one last squeeze, Callie released Arizona's hand and leaned back in her seat. "So, I think we've gotten to you at Hopkins. How is it being back at your old stomping grounds?"
Grateful for the subject change, Arizona forced herself to brighten up again. "It's great, actually. Norman McHale is the Chief of Surgery, so he's put me in charge of the pediatrics unit. I know that's what I did here in Seattle, but it kind of feels like going back to high school and becoming principal or something. It's really fun."
Callie's smile widened and Arizona blushed hard. She knew that look. "Don't worry, Alex calls me a nerd at least once a week. I'm aware that I'm a freak of nature."
"Just as long as we're clear," Callie started to laugh. "I'm glad that you're happy."
"It's great department all around," Arizona said. "I have a ton of funding since they're ranked number one in the country, so this loop of the stem cell trial is only the beginning of what we can do."
"Do you like it better than here?"
"The food doesn't suck as much and the students are more interested in surgery than sleeping with each other," Arizona commented. "Plus, I get to boss Karev around again. It's kind of a nice change of scenery."
"Don't mention any of that to the Chief," Callie pointed out. "He's still bitter about getting stuck behind Hopkins on the list year after year. And I think he's plotting revenge for you stealing his most promising peds fellow."
Arizona beamed and picked up her water glass. "I'll just have to get him a nice Christmas present."
They exchanged more work stories over the course of the morning breakfast rush. Other tables turned over once, twice, and still Callie caught Arizona up on the latest from Seattle Grace, throwing in questions about the clinic in Malawi. With the heavy stuff out of the way, it was easier for both of them to relax and have a normal conversation. Talking was starting to feel like old times.
"So, how's Mark doing?"
Callie immediately looked up, surprised, and Arizona shrugged. "I'm just curious. Has he knocked up any nurses or pharmaceutical reps yet?"
Callie cocked an eyebrow at the bizarre topic. "Mark is the last person I thought you'd ever ask me about."
"What, I can't be curious? He was a pain in the ass but I'm assuming he's still around and in your life."
Callie snorted. She wouldn't admit it to her best friend but she kind of missed Arizona's subtle digs at him. "Actually, he's grown up in the past couple of years. He's got a steady girlfriend and she's his age. You would be impressed."
It was Arizona's turn to be surprised. "Really? No more Little Grey?"
Callie shook her head. "No, I think that ship has sailed. The new one's pretty cool. They watch Sofia for me a lot, so that's handy."
"Mark's dating a grownup, I never would've guessed," Arizona hummed. "Do me a favour and don't tell Teddy if you talk to her again. We had this long-running bet on how many Little Sloans were out there running around. I don't want to lose fifty bucks."
A new server appeared at their table and asked if they wanted anything else. Only when Arizona checked her watch did she realize that they'd been talking for well over two hours. She started to ask for more coffee when Callie's hand blocked the mouth of her mug.
"I think you've had enough for this morning," Callie pointed out, arching a brow. "You're gonna vibrate a hole in the floor. Pace yourself."
She did have a point. Arizona politely declined any more caffeine and they were left to themselves again. "This place is good, it's just too bad that MJ's burned down. Remember when we went there for your birthday breakfast and the owner made you put on that ridiculous party hat?"
Callie snorted into her coffee. "That was humiliating."
"You looked adorable," Arizona teased. "Very classy, all those sequins and sparkles."
"I only did it because you were bribing me with certain other birthday activities at the end of the day," Callie pointed out. "Which was cruel, by the way."
"Hey, I followed through on those promises, didn't I?" Arizona meticulously raised an eyebrow and fixed her ex with a knowing smile.
Callie's cheeks flushed. Her 31st birthday had been pretty great, celebrated with friends and her girlfriend, full of presents and laughter. What stuck most in her mind was the later part of the evening - tangled together in a mess of sweaty bed sheets and limbs, feel Arizona's porcelain skin gliding effortlessly along her own, the sting of blunt nails biting into her lower back. For the first time in history, Arizona had actually called in sick to work the next day. They'd spent most of it in bed together, sleeping and making love. It was her most memorable birthday to date.
She tried to play it off and keep her mind focused on something more appropriate. "What I remember is you laughing at me in that stupid hat all throughout dinner. Didn't you shoot iced tea out of your nose?"
The phantom sensation made Arizona cringed. There had been some sort of vodka slipped into that 'iced tea', as she recalled. "At least we were regulars so they couldn't ban us from coming back."
"Somehow I don't see any straight male bar owner banning two hot lesbians just for being dorks. We were the highlight of his evening."
Arizona bit her lip and held back a grin. "What about your last birthday? Did you do anything special?"
Callie refilled their water glasses with a pitcher that had been left on the table. "No, not really - not unless you count doing a 13-hour interpositional arthroplasty 'special'. I mean I kind of do, but it is still nice to celebrate your birthday outside the hospital once in a while."
"A rarity," Arizona agreed. "So no celebrations, nothing?"
"I went home and tried to build Sofia's crib," Callie said thoughtfully. "I was like four-thousand pounds and out to the moon, and somehow I ended up building it backwards. Eventually I gave up and drank chocolate milk from a wine glass while watching Casablanca for the eight-hundredth time. It wasn't bad."
Arizona wondered where Erica was in all of this, whether she was still being a 'great friend' during that time or if they had already transitioned to partners. It was none of her business and thinking too hard about it made her feel ill.
"I was gonna call you," Arizona confessed, watching Callie's eyes light up from across the table. "I thought about you when I got back to the States, but then things with my dad's passing got complicated, and the move and everything, so…" She lifted her water glass in a toast to Callie's health. "Happy belated happy birthday, Calliope. Thirty-four suits you well. And hey - I might still be here for your thirty-fifth, so I can make it up to you then. How's that sound?"
For an extremely belated birthday wish and a promise that might not even happen, Callie found that she couldn't stop grinning. "Cheers," she agreed, clinking glasses. "That would be great."
The cafe's initial onslaught of food-starved morning people had slowed dramatically and the noise dipped to a more bearable hum. Arizona looked around them and took in the familiar sights of Seattle mid-morning, realizing that she felt relaxed for the first time in weeks.
"I've really missed this," she confessed as they sat in a more comfortable sort of quietness. "Don't get me wrong, I like my co-workers in Baltimore, but none of them are-"
"As amazing as I am?" Callie cut in, smugness hidden behind her glass. "Why thank you."
"They do have better taste in music."
Callie scoffed. "There is nothing wrong with my music! Kickass orthopedic surgeons listen to loud, obnoxious noises. You on the other hand, with your Taylor Swift and Justin Bieber, how do you sleep at night?"
"Hey!" Arizona shot back. "I do not willingly listen to that stuff, you know that."
"Sure," Callie drawled, sounding completely unconvinced. Arizona's insistence on pre-teen music in the OR with her younger patients made Callie's ears bleed.
"It's for the tiny humans," Arizona said hotly. "You try telling a sick child he or she can't go into life-endangering surgery listening to their hero sing them their favourite song. They give you these huge, sad eyeballs and their lips quiver and everything. You couldn't say no either."
Callie's lips tilted up in a smirk. There was more than one surgery during which she had nearly taken a bone saw to the entire OR staff when Arizona refused to change the tunes. "You just enjoyed torturing me, admit it."
"Karev, more specifically," Arizona grinned. "But hey, you never know what the kids can hear once they're under. Positive atmosphere and all that, the subconscious mind is a mystery."
Callie made a face. "If we end up in an OR together while you're here, I get to pick the music. Think of this as pre-emptive shotgun."
Her phone buzzed from the inside of her jacket and she took a second to fish it out, just in case it was the daycare regarding Sofia. It was the first time she had actually looked at a clock since coming here and she nearly choked on the remainder of her coffee. "Holy crap, we've been here for almost three hours."
Arizona checked her watch again and wondered when the hands had suddenly jumped ahead. "Yikes. Time flies, huh?"
"Especially when you get to have an adult conversation that doesn't revolve around Dora the Explorer or Barney and Friends," Callie said emphatically. "We should probably get going. What's your day like?"
The enormous amount of work blocking out the next several weeks of her schedule had Arizona sighing. "I have a bunch of hoops to jump through at the hospital, things aren't running too smoothly right out of the gate." She stole a quick look at Callie before busying herself with her phone. "Erica and Stark aren't making things easy on me. I don't anticipate they'll have a change of heart."
Callie grimaced. Getting stuck in the middle appealed to her about as much as guest starring in the next Saw movie. "Stark is always an ass," she offered. "I don't think you're gonna win with him."
"I'm starting to see I've got my work cut out for me, but luckily I'm a lovable person with some force and persistence." Arizona started to gather her things, triggering Callie to do the same. As much as she would love to stay and catch up all afternoon, she really had to get to work. "We should do this again some time. It was fun."
"It was," Callie agreed, smiling. She scooted out from her side of the table. "Come on, I'll drive you. Cab service sucks when its raining."
Arizona pulled on her jacket. "Are you sure? I don't want to get in the way of your plans."
Callie shot her a strange look. "Arizona, we're going to the exact same place. I'll drive you."
Arizona had to admit there was logic in that. "Thanks, Callie," she agreed. She dug out her wallet to pay for breakfast but Callie beat her to it and threw a wad of cash onto the table.
"You can get the next one," Callie said pointedly, putting an end to any debate.
Arizona narrowed her eyes and reluctantly put her money away. "Hm, deal." She shouldered her bag and indicated for Callie to go ahead in a 'ladies first' fashion.
Callie felt as though a weight had been removed from her shoulders as they walked out the front door together. It wasn't lost on her that agreeing to a 'next time' meant there would indeed be one at some point. In her mind, that was a much better option than dodging each other in the halls for weeks on end.
#*#*
"I can't believe you've kept this beast running all these years," Arizona commented as she relaxed into the passenger's seat of Callie's Thunderbird. They peeled around a corner and the car shifted gears, generating a hum that Arizona hadn't even realized she'd missed until now. The T-bird was older than the two of them combined and yet it still ran like it was fresh out of the factory.
"I take care of my baby," Callie said with a grin. Her palm wrapped around the shift gear and she gave it an affectionate pat.
"You always did love your car more than me," Arizona grumbled. "I bet there's a whole lot of broken hearts left behind because of this thing."
Callie rolled her eyes. "Your horsepower needed some work," she said sarcastically. "More horse power, more love." She ran her hand slowly along the top of the dash as they rolled up to a red light. "Henrietta has never steered me wrong."
Arizona's brow shot up. "Seriously?"
"Well, unless you count that time she crapped out on my drive down to San Diego, but other than that, she runs as smooth as silk." Callie leaned back, relaxed and at ease despite the stress of the last couple of days. Henrietta had a way of melting it all away - if any car was therapeutic, it was this one.
Arizona shook her head in disbelief. "Then there was the time 'Henrietta' steered you off the side of the road when we were going to Portland for the weekend."
"I don't like it when you use air quotes," Callie chimed in.
Arizona ignored her. "At least I never tried to run you into a lamp post. Robbins one, car zero."
Callie made a face. "You're just mad that you suck at driving a stick."
"And yet that sentiment is exactly how we ended up together in the first place, my special lady friend."
The second eye roll nearly did Callie in. "I walked right into that one," she mused as the light turned green again and they started moving again.
She thought back to the Portland incident about six months before their break-up. "If memory serves, you were the reason I took that corner too sharply in the first place. If your hand hadn't been in a certain… place , none of that would have happened."
Arizona tried to squash the cheesy grin that formed and chewed on her thumbnail instead. "I didn't hear you complaining."
"Never said I was," Callie smirked. "Just that it was your fault, not the car's. Henrietta one, Robbins nothing."
For the second time that morning, she was starting to think this was a dangerous path to go down. She loved that the two of them were back on speaking terms and that talking to Arizona was just as easy as it had always been, but memories of past liaisons felt disrespectful to her current relationship. That was a long time ago and she had other people in her life that wouldn't appreciate them.
Clearing her throat, she stole a quick glance at Arizona. "So, did I tell you Cristina's actually taken to Sofia? She'll play with her and everything."
They turned into the parking lot and Arizona dug for her phone again, checking to see if she had any incoming messages. "Yang? Good with kids?" She frowned without looking up. "I thought she was allergic to them?"
Callie steered the vehicle into an empty parking stall. "Well, she's Sofia's Godmother, so she tries her best."
Phone forgotten, Arizona twisted in her seat to stare at Callie like she had two heads. "You chose Cristina Yang to be your baby's Godmother?" she said loudly.
Yeah, that was pretty much the reaction Callie had expected. "It's not as weird as it sounds," she argued.
"Yang, the same woman that pretended to like children just to suck up to me during the merger. Yang, the doctor who makes kids cry. Yang, the doctor who wouldn't know how to play peek-a-boo if it jumped out and bit her in the ass."
"Oh come on," Callie protested. "You make it sound like she's incapable of handling a kid sharing the same air space."
"Calliope, she tried to give a two-year-old a Gobstopper. The kid would've choked to death if I hadn't checked in for rounds."
Callie rolled her eyes. "That was years ago. Don't worry, she doesn't let Sof play with sharp objects and she doesn't feed her choking hazards." Cutting the engine, she climbed out of the car and waited for Arizona to do the same before locking up. "Cristina's changed. And honestly, the more people and influences in Sofia's life, the better, right?"
Arizona conceded with a half shrug, even though she still thought the choice was an odd one. Then again, Callie and Cristina had always understood each other on a different level. Callie knew what she was doing.
As they approached the staff entrance, Callie felt another flutter of nerves in her chest. "That includes you, y'know, if you want," she hedged, trying to gauge Arizona's reaction through her peripheral vision.
Despite the casual way in which it was said, Arizona could read the apprehension in Callie's body language. She didn't want to give her any more reasons to stress out about her presence than necessary. "I'd love to get to know her better," she said after a moment of choosing her words carefully. "She is the world's cutest kid, after all. I have to see how much she's like her mom."
Callie felt some of the tension ease but she was still nervous on the inside. "I've made a mess of too many things in my life," she sighed. "I'm hoping Sofia uses better judgment."
Arizona shot her a funny look. "Yeah, your footsteps are so messy, what with the incredible career at a young age, inventing cartilage from nothing, and heading up what will probably turn out as one of the most successful orthopedic clinical trials in the next decade. All while raising a healthy, well-rounded and amazing daughter. Oh, and don't forget that inevitable Harper Avery nomination." She reached over and punched Callie in the shoulder. "God, it would be a shame if Sofia ended up anything like you."
Callie released an exasperated sigh. "Well when you put it that way, I sound like I'm fishing for compliments."
Winking, Arizona steered Callie through the door. "If she inherits that sarcastic grin of yours, the ladies won't know what hit 'em."
The very idea of her baby girl in dating mode made Callie stop walking all together. "Oh no, I have at least sixteen years before I have to start worrying about girlfriends or boyfriends," she argued, holding up a finger while adjusting her shoulder bag. Then the thought of all the horny teenaged boys chasing Sofia around behind her back came rushing in and she started to sweat. "Oh god, boyfriends. I'll be that scary mom she's too afraid to bring anybody home to and then god knows what will happen behind my back."
"Give yourself more credit than that," Arizona chuckled as they started walking again. "You'll be fine when the time comes for those challenges. And if her boyfriend or girlfriend is a total ass, then just scheme out a way to separate them and she'll never be the wiser."
When all she received was a grumbled, noncommittal response, Arizona slowed her pace again and nudged Callie in the side. "You're an amazing mom and friend, Callie. You're not gonna screw your daughter up. She's lucky to have you looking out for her. Believe me, I've met some really scary parents that should not be raising children. You are not one of them."
Callie was starting to look a little more convinced, though the very idea of Sofia dating was freaking her out. Now she would spend the next sixteen years worrying; that couldn't be good for her health. "At least I'm not a pageant mom, right?" she mused, conceding to Arizona's pep talk.
Arizona burst out laughing as they continued through the lobby, her sole focus on the woman beside her. "Oh god, I will call child services if I ever come across a parent forcing their kid into that kind of thing."
"Remember when we used to watch 'Dance Moms' every week?" Callie added enthusiastically. "God, I almost forgot how bad that show was." Suddenly she couldn't seem to stop herself from snickering. Their co-piloted commentary had made those TV marathons a blast.
"Oh, you should have seen this one mom in Maryland," Arizona jumped in again, her whole face lighting up. "Her daughter needed her appendix taken out but she actually tried to postpone the surgery until after they had-"
Two things happened at once: Callie stopped dead in her tracks and Arizona heard someone clearing their throat. She frowned, backtracking a step, and finally looked ahead.
There weren't many things in life that Callie was ever truly afraid of, but Erica looking like she could frighten off a pack of grizzly bears was definitely one of them.
"So," Erica started, her voice alarmingly calm. She stared right at Callie, ignoring the other person present, and folded both arms over her chest. "'Work stuff', huh?"