I own nothing.

ROSE POV

I can literally feel my eyes dull in unhappiness as we round a corner and St. Vlads appears, surrounded by an endless sea of forest. It took much longer than expected to get here so the sun has almost set and the start of the vampiric day is beginning. Great. I was hoping to get a few hours sleep before speaking with the novices.

If I didn't have such horrible memories of this place I would think its grand castle structure was beautiful. Okay, it is beautiful, even I can't deny that. Three identical SUV's are in front of ours, waiting to be searched and let through the gate, making my unease grow. I don't want to be here, but I hate being cramped in this car.

"Brings back a lot of memories, already." Eddie whistles.

I purse my lips and chance a glance towards Lissa. I'm sure his memories are far better than ours.

I stab of panic hits me and I immediately recognize it as Lissa's, thanks to our bond. I send her a questioning look, but she just shakes her head and burrows deeper in sparkies arms. Later, blondie.

As I said, Lissa's magical element is Spirit, a very uncommon element that allows her to heal things. When we were fifteen we were in an awful car accident, run off the rode by a drunk driver, resulting in the death of her parents and brother. I would have died as well but Lissa healed me, brought me back from the brink of death and bound us together. Now I can see through her eyes, read her thoughts and feel her emotions when she is feeling strongly about something.

I have come to despise her orgasms.

Our car creeps forward as it's our turn to be checked, a line of other SUV's following behind us.

Two Guardians I do recognize stride toward our car, looking like they could use a day off and motion for us to roll down our windows.

"Still on front gate duty, I see." I say as another female guardian (We are far and few), Celeste, walks over to my side of the car. Celeste, like most female guardians, wears her dark hair cropped short, years of hard work painted on her face.

"Rose Hathaway, will I'll be, you haven't changed." She smiles at me, showing a tooth missing on the left side.

"You flatter me, Celeste." I turn to Sheen's window and smile at Guardian Yuri who is looking around our car.

"Good to see all of you again." Yuri nods, his Japanese accent deep. "You all can move forward."

Yuri was never one for chit chat.

I smile goodbye at Celeste as our car gets back in line of moving cars.

As we near the front entrance I see a line of guardians, most of which I don't know, waiting to greet incoming guests. I run a hand across the sleek hair on top of my head and than my long pony tail, making sure it doesn't look crazy.

I refused to cut my fuck-awesome hair.

I've never met my father, don't even know his name, but I do know I inherited some wicked cool dark brown hair from him.

"How do I look, Rose?" Lissa asks, smoothing her hair as well.

"Why not ask me?" Fire crotch pouts.

Lissa giggles and kisses him. Ew.

"Because you are entirely, biased. Rose?"

I look to her and answer honestly.

"If I didn't already know you've done the nasty with Flame-boy, I would tap that." I purr to her, biting my lip and beaconing her with my eyebrows.

Lissa and Christian roll their eyes at me as Mason and Eddie make cat calls.

Our car parks and all us guardians exit first, trying to hide our smiles, and hold open the doors for Lissa and El Flamo.

My emotions are kind of conflicted right now. Part of me knows I can relax, Lissa is safe here against Strigoi, as magic wards surround the school, impossible for Bad Draculas to cross. But the other part just hates it here too much.

I breath in deeply a few times and force myself to relax. I gotta make the best of this, I just have to.

I think about beating up Sheen and relax. Violence is very calming.

Lissa, by my side I walk to St. Vlads head Guardian, and one of the greatest women I have ever known, Alberta Petrov. Alberta is African American, originating from Egypt; she stands at about 5'6, with short graying hair. She's in her mid forties and in similar condition as Celeste; the years have been rough to her.

"I would usual never do this," She says, accent faint, leaving the line and walking over to me with a slight smile, "But it is good to see you, Rose." She hugs me tightly. I hug her back, giving as good as I get.

I was only four when my Egg donor dropped me off at the academy and 'Berts, became my mother. She held me when I cried, cut my hair and helped me with my homework. I've never known a better person.

"It's good to see you too, 'Berts." We let go and smile at one another. Alright so far so good.

Lissa and her boy-toy as well as a few other Moroi exiting their cars are quickly escorted to their rooms, seeing as the sun hasn't set completely just yet.

I stay with Albert as Eddie and Mason go with them. They long line of guardians are here so that we, I and whoever was chosen to speak and train the novices, can be escorted to the Guardians common room and be briefed about our parts are here.

I'm introduced to a flurry guardians that weren't here when I was and a few I'm familiar with.

"Rosemarie." Someone calls to me from behind.

I close my eyes and sigh as I recognize the voice. I knew she was going to be here, not only does her charge have kids that go here, but when speaking of respected guardians, her name will always be spoken. Doesn't change the fact that a little part of me hoped she wouldn't come.

I open my eyes and see Alberta smile gently, her weathered face sympathetic. I give her a small smile in return and turn to face my mother.

Janine Hathaway is a short woman, five-foot exactly, only three inches shorter than me, with auburn shoulder length curls and brown eyes that match mine that look dull; tired. Her black attire looks frumpy on her, but I know under them her figure is full.

The years haven't been nice to her, either. Maybe I am overly vain, but seeing her haggard tan skin makes me want to cry. She's only 42, ancient in Guardian years, but she's not pretty anymore. Once upon time she was; she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen.

Is this my future?

Maybe she just didn't keep up maintance on herself? Maybe she wanted to, but didn't have the time? Maybe she just doesn't care.

Or most scary of all, maybe she does care and tried her hardest to preserve her looks . . . but coudn't.

"Guardian Hathaway." I greet her. No way am I calling her mom.

She didn't raise me, the academy did. Alberta and my mentor did.

I saw her maybe a grand total of ten times growing up, and each time she spent her whole visit correcting me, yelling at me, making me feel like a burden and a failure.

The last time I saw her was at my Trials. The last test novices endure to see if they receive a promise mark, making us a full fledged Guardian; our last fight. I not only aced mine, but set the record for fastest trail ever completed. And what did Mother Dearest have to say to me afterward?

'Your affinity for bravado will get you killed one day.'

Thanks mom.

Her thin, chapped lips purse roughly, hearing her title instead of mom, but she doesn't comment on my choice of words, which is smart because I have a whole list of other things to call her instead.

"I'm surprised . . . to see you here." She says, posture stiff. She's originally from Scotland so her words are still slightly accented.

That set all my guards up. Fucking Bitch.

"You were you going to say, 'i'm surprised you were invited here. Weren't you?" I growl lowly, my anger seeping in my words, filling them with venom.

She just purses her lips again and that was more than her words could have possibly told me.

She thinks I don't belong in the category of respected Guardians. I can't believe her. . .

It's not about the kills. Killing is not something to be celebrated, that is not why I fucking deserve respect. I deserve it because no matter what danger I have faced, I have protected Lissa and Christian, I've never been defeated. I have kept Lissa save, happy and loved. I've always been their for anybody who has needed me and I've never given up. I've been the first to enter the fight and the last to leave, I have done my duty.

I don't say any of that to her, though. I will never be enough in her eyes, never be given a chance to be enough. I don't know what I did for her to hate me so throughly, but whatever it is there's no coming back from it.

"It was nice seeing you again, Janine, hopefully I don't again." I light up a cig and walk away.

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