Disclaimer

Inuyasha (c) Rumiko Takahashi

Author's Note

I am back with a new chapter after a month staying dead somewhere. This chapter actually took me quite a long time to write because I had too many ideas to process how it would turn out, along with several versions of it was raw writing and most was unfinished because I had no idea how to continue with the ideas as it was. In the end it was done. And the damage was done too.

Warning

Angsty Inucest. If you like a happy chapter with something cute and WAFF, you are encouraged to read something else. The direction of this story are not going toward WAFF, yet.

Chapter 5

"Kaede-sama!"

The old miko looked up from her herb gathering work on the hill, which located in far east of her village to catch a glimpse of the child running toward her. The child was brilliant, kind, innocent, everything one would love to have as one's child, despite her long period living with a taiyoukai who always wanted to kill his own younger brother, an annoying imp, and a two heads dragon.

The girl skidded to a stop when she came to three steps away from the old miko, who also acknowledge the adults came with her. The monk and the taijiya inclined their heads in greeting. They would, of course, get a piece of her mind if they were daring enough to let the girl run all the way from the village through the forest to get here all by herself.

"Kaede-sama.", Rin called again, and the old miko patted her head gently, the clearly affection act made the girl giggled and Rin, in turn, without hesitation closed their gap to hug the miko around her waist, the height to which her short height could reach. "Kaede-sama, Sango-sama and houshi-sama wanted to speak to you, but you were not in the village so Rin brings them here!", the child said eagerly.

Kaede frowned at her speech, while the monk and the taijiya stood dumbfound looking at the girl, too astonished at her to say anything else. Was it just them or the way the girl spoke reminded them dreadfully of someone they knew?

The old miko put that thought to somewhere in the back of her mind, something she would start to work into at a later time, to look at the two adults stood nearby, noted their nervousness. She looked up at the sky and noticed it was going to get dark soon. "Let's go back, then.", she told them all and they started moving in the direction of the village, with Rin ran spinning in the lead.

"She's cute, isn't she?", Sango spoke for the first time during their way back. Her guilt for almost killing the girl inside Naraku resurfaced and evident in her voice. The monk grabbed her hand with a gentle squeezed, she only shook her head and gave him a small smile.

"Did Inuyasha tell you to get me?", Kaede asked after a while, her eyes fixing on the enthusiasm girl ahead. Although the girl was sprinting herself here and there and sometimes would be too far ahead, but she never stayed out of the adults' sight.

"Actually, Kaede-sama,", Miroku began, "We came for you to ask if you knew where he could be... He has not returned yet.", he finished as he casted a glance at the darkening sky.

At this Kaede tore her gaze away from the child to regard the two adults walked alongside her. "You haven't seen him at all?"

Sango nodded. "We searched in his forest and people in the village said they did not see him at all."

"Where could he be?...", the miko repeated.

By then, they had reached the outskirt of the village. Everyone was hoping as they was getting close to Kaede's hut, the sight of a certain irritated hanyou pacing around with a grumbling stomach and spilling curses for late dinner would greet their eyes.

However, those inside the hut proved them otherwise.

Kohaku was sitting near the dying fire in the middle of the old miko's hut with Kirara laying atop his folded legs and Shippo leaning on his right thigh, sound asleep. Upon seeing the adults filled in the hut, he looked up at them then close his eyes and shook his head, the gesture gave their unasked question gaze a silent answer. When he opened his eyes, Rin was already sitting by his left, the three adults sat across from them.

"Aneue.", Kohaku called, gained the attention of the humans in the small hut, "Earlier, Kouga-"

He was interrupted as a certain wolf demon suddenly decided to barge into the human dwelling. "Oi!"

"Kouga?!", to say the monk and the taijiya were astonished was an understatement. They'd thought Kouga would never show up again since the day he'd left the fight with Naraku. And about Kagome…

The wolf prince darted his eyes around the hut scanning the residents, he momentarily noticed the small girl hiding behind the younger taijiya's back, that one looked familiar… But he turned to look at Kohaku as the boy's lips pressed together to a thin line and he frowned while his eyes glanced back and forth between Rin and Kouga.

"His scent disappeared near the outskirt of the forest.", Kouga announced seemingly to all of the humans, he folded his arms across his chest, "There was no sight of any fighting though… but… hmm…", he seemed to lost in thought then.

"Wait a minute, what do you mean by his scent disappeared?", the monk spoke up in confusion.

"As I said, it disappeared.", Kouga regarded the monk, "It led to the outskirt then stopped… don't look at me like that!", he snapped as the humans all looked at him with the expression that screamed 'Are you serious?'

It seemed to be a long conversation with the humans, he concluded, so he moved away from the entrance and sat down near the slumbering fox kit. Once again he noticed the small girl hiding behind Kohaku, now looked at him with a curious light in her eyes.

Kohaku silently observed the exchange between the girl and the wolf. During his short travel with Sesshoumaru's pack, he'd learned about Rin's first death and aware of her trauma concerning the wolf.

"Um…", Rin whispered, till looked curiously at the wolf sat on Kohaku's other side, "Thank you for saving me that time…"

"Huh?", the wolf prince now confused, okay so this human girl knew him, and she looked familiar too, but he swore he didn't know any other human girl but Kagome and her traveling companion taijiya… Then it hit him. "Ah.", his eyes widened at the realization, "You are the human chibi I saw with that girly looking dog!", he announced.

Suddenly the monk, the taijiya siblings looked away from him and covered their mouths, their shoulders shaking, a gesture suspicious looked like they were trying hard not to laugh out loud. While the old miko started coughing from time to time. The girl now stood up and walked around Kohaku to face to face with the wolf, hands on her hips as her face contorted its best to scowl, but to all the lookers, she looked like she was pouting. "Sesshoumaru-sama is not a girly looking dog! He is strong!", she bellowed in defense for her lord. This wolf demon just talked bad about her lord!

Kouga looked at the girl with a bored expression and waved his hand dismissively. He had more important things to do than to argue with a dog-fangirl, a human kid one at that. This was going to be a long night… He rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, what do you guys think if the mutt and… Sesshoumaru-sama," he drawled in sarcasm without looking at the fuming human girl, "were together?"

"They would try to tear each other's throat out…", a sleepy voice mumbled from the right side of Kohaku. Shippo sat up and rubbed the sleep off his eyes and he noticed everyone was looking at him, "You guys are back…"

"Did you sleep well?", Kohaku asked, his fingers absently rubbed Kirara's chin, to which the cat purred in contentment.

"I thought I heard someone was screaming… so I woke up… what's happened?", Shippo looked around confused.

"I'm sorry.", Rin timidly whispered apologetically as she sat down near Shippo.

The fox kit looked at her, then to the wolf demon. Kouga just shrugged. "Have you guys found Inuyasha?", the fox kit asked the adults in hope, but upon his wakening there was still no sight of Inuyasha, he already knew their answer.

"Not yet.", Sango said, she looked at the saddened fox kit, "Why don't you have a rest first with Kohaku and Rin and Kirara. You guys seemed tired. Knowing Inuyasha, he would return before you knew it.", she tried to lighten the mood in the small human shelter, which was kept warm by the small fire in the middle.

"I guess…", Shippo gave a small whisper after a yawn as he stood up with Rin and Kohaku, who had the cat in his arm and walked out of the miko's hut to the spared hut they had used to when they were fighting with Naraku not far away from there.

With the children were now gone from earshot, the four remaining regarded each other.

"I smelt Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru near your holy tree and it led westward. Then it was like they were gone together somewhere. I lost their scents near the end of the forest.", Kouga spoke in more details.

"Since you left their relationship hopefully improved a bit, but we are not sure.", Miruko said, "Sesshoumaru regrew his lost left arm, got a new sword together with it, too…", the monk stated in wonder, now that he thought about it, that situation was unbelievable in itself than most…

"Are you serious?!", the wolf snorted, "If I could spawn a weapon and regrew a limp that way I'd be gladly have an arm or a leg cut off all the time."

"But it was the thruth.", Sango sighed, "Toutousai said that because Sesshoumaru had let go of his resentment against Inuyasha and attachment to their father' sword Testsusaiga he'd gained his own sword and his lost arm."

"So you presumed because of that they may be in a better… relationship?", Kouga looked at them for confirmation, to which the monk and the taijiya both nodded. The wolf hummed in thought. He had not much information about how dog demon reacted to each other but he guessed as the same fellow canines, dog and wolf maybe not so different. "So what if Sesshoumaru knew about Inuyasha's secret?", he wondered aloud absentmindly.

"I think not.", The monk stated, "Given their past encounters, if Sesshoumaru knew about his human night Inuyasha may not survive this long. Sesshoumaru hated his human blood."

"Or their father demon blood is running inside Inuyasha in that matter." Sango added.

"Then you may want to think about the worst possible.", Kouga stood up and walked toward the hut's entrance, the sky was pit black and dawn was still very far away. "If they were till together, no doubt by now Sesshoumaru was seeing his human brother, if he let the mutt alive at all.", he finished and was gone before anyone could speak up.

On his way back to his pack, something was unsettled to him. About all the hanyou mysteries that came into his knowledge by rumors. Why? Because there was no hanyou alive long enough to confirm what the rumors about their half-breed race were true or false, and not so many cared about it either. All the hatred against hanyou in particular forced them to live as outcasts in both human and youkai societies and was killed in sight, infant or not. Inuyasha was the only one hanyou he'd known until now that lived long enough to almost reach maturity and he grudgingly acknowledged his strength and courage throughout their encounters.

But in his brief exchange with Inuyasha's brother, Sesshoumaru, he'd felt something odd about this demon, one he could not say what. That one time he'd taunted the other about their half sibling relationship and Sesshoumaru's reaction to it. Sure he'd saw the other was pissed, but there was something else, almost hidden there, almost. He'd pushed that thought away, maybe it was just his imagination. But then again, he was youkai, what he saw with his eyes was what it was. And what was that if his eyes was working fine?

"Maybe Inuyasha could stay alive this long was because Sesshoumaru knew about it…", he talked to no one in particular as he sped up through the dark toward his pack.

If his guess was right then the chance to meet the hanyou again was not slim. He did not want to raise the humans' hope up for all their loyalty toward the hanyou just to have it turned into despair at the end of the day. This was, after all his own theory in the situation, he had no guarantee about it.

He thought about the turn of the event, since the first time he'd met Kagome. He had changed, a lot. And surprising enough, he did not miss the youkai that was himself before he knew her at all.

"I am turning soft.", he laughed shortly as his legs kept moving frantically toward the direction of his home.

The moonless night surrounded everything. Having the knowledge that no one knew about and having the answers that everyone wanted to know about. Yet the moonless night stayed silent as ever, to keep what she knew sealing deep within her dark embrace.

Pain. All he felt was pain. Pain in his left. Pain in his right. Pain above. Pain below. From inside out and even outside in.

He could not feel anything else but pain.

Pain to the point he wondered if this was what dead felt like. He was too bad to be in the heaven and was threw to hell instead?

Then he heard something sound like a snort.

"If I did not know it I would have doubt the fact that you've been sleeping in a tree for the most part of your life."

He groaned. Damn that noise hurted his skull like a bitch. Either you shut up or stop talking!

"Stop moving. Inuyasha."

Fuck you! Just shut up! You are hurting my ears! He groaned again. Every-damn-thing hurted so damn much and that fucking damn voice was fucking with his damn head.

"Inuyasha."

Now that voice was a low growl right in his ears. He tried his best to grip whatever he was gripping in his hands to will his pain away momentarily to force open his heavy eyelids. Whoever-that-was was gonna have a piece of his mind right now for making him felt like shit with that fucking voice right now!

He saw white and red and puffy something first thing first. He strained his jaw muscle to mutter a weak "huh?" at whatever was it that greeted his eyes. His voice sounded too weak for his liking, and the intense pain was not subdue any, if not increasing as time passed by. What the hell was going on with his body?

"Stop moving. You are killing us both."

He heard that voice again and his head snapped to the direction of it. A bad move. Because he felt as if his neck almost broke in the process. But what he saw right then and there rendered him speechless.

Judging by this position, he was laying atop Sesshoumaru, and they were nestled inside his fluffy thing that he always had it wrapped around his right shoulder. But it was completely bathed in crimson color with copper smelling this close. He felt light head. He felt like passing out now would be better. Or die now would be the best. His eyes were about to roll upward that he felt something pressed on his back and made the pain more intensify, which successfully rendered him unable to reach his paradise of unconsciousness. He gritted his teeth to muffle his groan of pain. He dropped his head back to Sesshoumaru chest. Then he heard a soft grunt from the one laying under him, followed with unimaginable shallow breaths, and very faint slow heartbeat.

"Why am I till alive?", he whispered to himself.

"I would rather know why you have not dead yet if I was you.", he heard Sesshoumaru said softly as he felt the thing pressed against his back tightened to the point of almost breaking his ribs.

"I thought those were the same thing…", Inuyasha snorted, "Your age finally catch up to you, Sesshoumaru."

"Hn", was all he heard from his brother as they went all silent. Neither spoke up again for a very long time that he thought Sesshoumaru may be asleep, if his brother ever slept at all.

That was when he realized the state they were in, especially Sesshoumaru's. They were both completely covered in blood. Sesshoumaru's usual fluffy white thing was now colored in a deep crimson and his right hand was limply at his side while his left hand undoubtly was position at his back to steady him atop his brother. But what drew his attention the most was Sesshoumaru's right shoulder, where usually covered by his fluff was now bare, pale skin covered in angry red tendons and to make it worse, the wound that should be healed over time keep bleeding and it was not healing by what he was seeing. And it was the reason why he saw red everywhere.

Sesshoumaru had his eyes close, his brow furrowed together in a soft grimace. All of his life knowing his brother, Sesshoumaru never showed pain. Now seeing what was present in front of his very eyes... Then he saw a flash of Kagome's era, where demon was just a myth. Fear and panic bubbled in his stomach. He needed to do something. If it kept up Sesshoumaru would die of blood lost, taiyoukai or not! And he would not have Sesshoumaru died on him, not back then, not now, not ever!

He tried to squirm away from Sesshoumaru. He needed to do something, anything, but what he could do now. His body was even worse. Each movement spiked a new pain to his spine and flesh, but he was not gonna sit around and watch this… this…

"Sesshoumaru…", he weakly called out for his brother. His vision blurry.

"I told you to stop moving.", Sesshoumaru's soft voice reach his ears but his eyes remained closed.

To hear this voice spoke to him without the usual harshness and hatred was not something he used to. At any other time he would feel anything but worry. "You are bleeding!"

"Is there something else I know that you want to tell me?", this time Sesshoumaru opened his eyes a bit to grace Inuyasha with a flash of irritated golden iris.

"Release me so I can do something about it.", Inuyasha mumbled. His brother' sarcasm somehow almost made him feel relief. Almost.

"No.", Sesshoumaru deadpanned.

Inuyasha dropped his head and groaned. He felt a small rumble where his ear was in contact with Sesshoumaru's bare chest. If he didn't know better, he'd swear the bastard was laughing, for fucking sake, he was laughing!

"It is healing."

"The hell it is!", Inuyasha snapped.

He saw one eye of his brother twitched. His sudden raised of voice hurted both their ears and his own dry throat. He glanced at the till bleeding bloody punctured flesh of his brother. His mind registered that was exactly the place his Kongousouha was lodged in when they were fighting. And had his mind was more clear, the fact that he was once got pierced through his stomach with several diamond spears bonus with Naraku's miasma not long ago in the attempt to absorb Sesshoumaru's Meidou Zangetsuha, and thanked to Sesshoumaru intervention it had already started healing right when his brother yanked them out of his body. But right now his mind was working on how to stop the bleeding to notice Sesshoumaru's wound was not healing at all as it was supposed to be, nor the abnormal red tendons spreading around the bloody gash.

"You will not moving around in this state.", Sesshoumaru said quietly and closed his lids. His breath was far too shallow for Inuyasha's liking.

"At least let me get something to eat.", the younger tried again. If he could find food maybe it would help with the healing process.

"You would become the food before you could even get any food.", Sesshoumaru's eyesbrow twitched, annoyed was evident in his voice. Couldn't the pup just stay where he was and rest till they were both capable of doing something else aside rest?

"Hey! I am not the one got a hole in my body this time! Asshole!", Inuyasha snapped.

"Because Tenseiga was the sword that can't cut."

"You pinned me!"

"And?"

"And…", Inuyasha stopped. He didn't remember anything after that. What had happened? Sesshoumaru's forehead did not bleed the last time he saw him, neither was his kimono tattered nor his armor missing. Nor he even bathed in his own blood…

Dread consumed him as he painfully raised his hand to his vision.

He saw bloody human blunt nails.

His eyes widened as he looked at his hair on his side in panic. He met a midnight black hair sticky with both dry and wet blood. Oh no…

I am human!

"How much do you remember after that?", he heard Sesshoumaru soft voice and looked up. Those emotionless eyes looked at him again. He tried to search for something he did not want to see in those all too familiar golden eyes that haunted his childhood. But he found nothing. Who was he joking with? To think he could even read his brother…

He dropped his gaze. "Nothing.", eyeing his hands he spoke softly, "I did… all… this?", he swallowed the lump in his throat, "I lost myself to my own demon… again?"

For a long time that went on like forever for Inuyasha, but in reality only a short time after he had spoken, Sesshoumaru's left hand that was on his back moved upward to the back of his head and guided him to the area between his brother's left shoulder and neck. He wasted no time in buried himself in the small shelter that was wordlessly offered and let his tears fell. The shook of his body by his mental anguish gave them both new physical waves of pain. But at that time neither of them cared anymore.

Sesshoumaru laid seemingly motionless holding his hanyou younger brother.

Inuyasha curled up against his brother like a pup crying after he realized he had done something bad. But he knew it better, something he had done was even worse than just bad.

"No." Sesshoumaru said softly. "And no.", his fingers ran softly against black hair in search for the trace of once was there puppy ears that was now turned into human ears stayed at the side of Inuyasha's head. "Maybe that was your own body. But it was not you who did this."

Inuyasha choked on his own blood that seeped out of his mouth. "This must be a dream.", he tried to laugh but it came out as a cough of more blood when he moved his face away from the hollow of Sesshoumaru's neck to look at his brother's face, his vision was dimming. "You've never comforted me in all my life. But it was all good. At least I am to die this way… till being myself…", he smiled weakly at the widened eyes Sesshoumaru, "And for once in my life to have you treat me like a brother…"

He never felt Sesshoumaru hand had moved away from his head and more blood started spilling, this time was from the very fresh cuts from where Sesshoumaru had dug his claws into his own left palm, forced his demon blood oozed out and showered the younger even more in crimson liquid that was the very life essence of his older brother.

"… than a filthy half breed…"

Darkness welcomed the hanyou in its cold embrace. And Inuyasha gladly accepted with little to no struggling. He had nothing else to live for. Kagome was gone. Sango and Miroku had each other. Sango and Kohaku was reunited. Kaede had more to worry about than hanging out with her late sister's past lover. He felt bad to leave them without saying goodbye, but he'd never good at it either. If they never saw him again then that was it.

And Sesshoumaru, his own brother would never miss him. Even though he had a good last dream about dying as himself, and not a mindless monster, in his brother arms at least…

She felt unease. She had been pacing around her palace since forever when this feeling wormed its ugly self into her consciousness. Something was calling for her somewhere, but she couldn't point out exactly what. Her limps were trembling as she tried her best to steady herself. She forced her rational to work its best to solve the reason as to why this feeling of dread was consuming her.

Her ancient wisdom whispered tauntingly in her head. That she did not want to acknowledge this feeling, the one she tried to bury in the deepest depth of her soul centuries ago. The very same feeling she never wanted to live in again.

The feeling that was long forgotten.

Way back when she had given birth to Sesshoumaru.

"Sesshoumaru?..."

To be continued...

Author's Rant

Somehow I think I've made another sort of cliff hanger in this chapter too. And not just one.

I am very fond of dog, mind you. And I like both Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru, and I surely want to see them live a happy life ever after. But seriously, I've never seen any living happily ever after couple without walking through hardship together here and there. And happiness never fell from the sky like some of the people in the world suddenly won a Lotte from nowhere in particular. Even Kagome and Inuyasha's bond was tested too many times to count in Inuyasha series for them to finally settled down together at last. So you can expect a happy ending in the end of this story, but I ask you to leave now if you think I am going to make them walk toward the end with little to no effort (on both their side and mine).

I surely am going to try not to make them act too out of character. But the situation I gave whoever in my story was not the same situation they had in their main story, so none of my reader, include myself, can demand of me the in character state of any of the character that made their present in my story.

Review reply

To mangafan, I hope I could make it worth for the wait too :).

To SesshoPuppy, I am not taking anyone's order, nor I am going to stop writing my own story just because you told me to stop writing. If you think I am offended you in some ways or another, you are encouraged to go and read other stories out there.

And I thank you for those who Favorited and Following my story. Knowing you silent observers in my story was a nice boost in my motivation to lessen the time gap between this chapter and the next of this story because I feel so good!

Much love to all my readers.

Until next time.

Asuka K.