WARNING: Contains blood and self-mutilation! And slight non-consensual material. Do not like, then do not read! You have been warned.

I slump against the wall of my bedroom, thoughts filling and squirming around my ever-filled brain. I'm not the smartest person out there (in fact, I think Shikamaru is), but I am a fairly poetic type.
Before my poems would be filled with happiness and laughter.
Now... now they're dark; like a yellow rose stained permanently black. Or a red rose that's withered away into nothing.
I dig through my old poems in a nearby suitcase and read them aloud, per the request of my doting now-boyfriend, Sasuke Uchiha.
"Yellow rays that shine my face, and the feeling of his loving grace. A poignant smell caress my nose, and graceful banter like a rose. He came to take my breath away; and now I'm here to forever stay."
He snickers and I blush. "Very... frilly."
"I was happier then..."
He pauses and frowns. "You're not now..."
I give a sort of bitter laugh. "Let's just say I've adopted a darker personality to accommodate your sadism and my masochism."
"So you're blaming me for your unhappiness?" He asks me skeptically.
"I'm not gonna lie. Yes. I am. If you hadn't been so sadistic with me to begin with, I would have never became the masochist I am, I never would have felt despair or fell into depression. But blaming you's not gonna solve anything, so why voice it? I gotta solve my own problems." I look to the side.
He growls and pins me to the floor. I look up at him, blue eyes shining with fear.
He punches me in the cheek before ripping off our clothes and pressing into me very harshly. "Don't ever blame for you fucked up behavior."
I cry out and let the tears fall down. He's so cruel. Why do I love him so much? It hurts. I'm hurting.
He presses in and out of me and dominates me as handles me as roughly as he can, bruising my hips and causing my ass to bleed. It hurts so much. I hate it, but at the same time, I love it. He hurts me so and I endure it, beg for more. I want more. More of him, more of his sadistic love. I want it, crave it.
I am a masochist after all.
When he's done with my ass, he has me lick up the remaining semen on his penis before putting our clothes back on (after cleaning both of us off). He gets up and leaves as I stand up and limp toward my bed. I lay there and stare at the ceiling before hearing the door slam shut.
I curl into a ball and just cry. I don't know what I'm doing wrong but I wish Sasuke would love me like a normal human being.
After I get the tears out, I dig through my bedside drawer and pluck out a thin razor blade. I hold it in my fingers before etching deeply into my skin. Deep enough to scar, deep enough for me to possibly die.
I do more damage by taking a lighter to the backs of my hands and just burning the flesh. I can smell it. The smell of burning, rotting flesh.
I'm disgusting. Repulsive. I'm rotten to the core. I need a shower.
I head toward the shower, strip down, and turn it on. Once it's warm enough, I step in and lay down, letting my blood flow down the drain. I start to feel lightheaded before passing out.

I don't where I am or why I'm here, but all I see is darkness. There's no light, no sound. Just silence and pitch black. It's like a bittersweet nightmare.
Is this death?
Have I finally died?
But... I don't wanna die just yet...
Or do I? I'm unsure.
I feel cold in this place.
I don't... understand.
Wait.
I see something.
I look up to see... film reel.
Memories of my life are flooding past me... but where is "me"? I don't see my body. Where is this place?
My memories... they seem to be fading.
Ah. I can hear something now.
It's faint, but I can hear it.
It's... inaudible.
I can't make it out, but I know where it's coming from. I run towards the sound as it grows louder and louder until finally I hear it loud and clear. Someone is calling my name.
"Naruto! Naruto, wake up! Don't die on me! I can't lose you, too."
Too? Wait... I know this voice.
If only I could see their face.
"Hang in there, please!"
"Naruto, you can't do this to us!"
I know that voice, too.
I think... I think I see a light. But... it's not the light I was expecting.

I blink my eyes open and see a worried Kurama to my right with a paramedic next to him. Karin's sitting right beside him.
Now I know why those voices were so familiar.
I have oxygen mask on my face. I must be having trouble breathing.
"Naruto! Thank Kami you're awake!"
Karin's worried. I messed up again.
I made everyone worried.
I can't do anything right.
"I'm tired..." I barely whisper before the world goes dark again.

Sorry this update's so late.
I got into a motorcycle accident and had road rash all over my hands.
Luckily, I heal quick so I was able to make a quicky update.
Hope you enjoy it.
And yes... Naruto's going to be going more insane from here on out.

Your author,
Nova