Alex got home really late, his energy completely drained from his body, that's why he got angry when he saw the bags from the grocery store still in the kitchen counter.
- Really, Jo? – He shouted – Do I have to do this also?
Then he heard the muffled sobs that came from their room and all the anger and tiredness suddenly disappeared.
He knocked on the door, knowing better that to interrupt Jo when she cried.
- Come in – She answered, burying her face in the pillow again.
By the time arrived home she had decided to take the test before placing the things, but once she had gotten the result fear had crept through her body, paralysing her, and all left to do was cry.
She felt Alex sitting beside her and placing a big hand on her back, rubbing it against her green coloured sweater, to give her comfort.
He laid next to her, non-stopping the motion – What's wrong? – He finally asked.
She wanted to answer that nothing was wrong, that things were better than fine except that she was scared, terrified.
She started crying uncontrollably, unable to speak and almost unable to breathe.
Alex hugged her tight, rocking her in his arms, back and forth, trying to soothe her worries. He was nervous, sweating, "What could have happened to turn the tough woman he loved into a crying baby?"
- Jo, princess – He cupped her face, her nose and eyes were red for all the tears – Tell me.
She had a not on her throat so it took her a few tries before stuttering the words – I I I am pregnant.
Half her worries went away when she caught sight of the smile crossing Alex's face – What's wrong about that? You don't want it? – The smile slowly disappeared as he put into words the possibility of her not wanting their baby.
- Of course I want it! – She shouted and Alex breathed in relief – How couldn't I want it?!
- Then, what's the problem? Why were you crying your eyes out?
She looked down, to the blanket under her – I'm scared – She whispered, so low that Alex almost didn't hear her.
He kissed her forehead, slowly, as if any sudden movement would make her weep again – Why?
- I won't be a good mom.
- That's stupid – He lifted her chin, forcing her to see him – Because you didn't have a mother? You're a great person, Jo. You already love that kid! That's all you need.
He kept on talking, afraid of not being able to convince her about how great she will be - You'll have me, every step of the journey. Some days you'll even have to stop me from running blood test because our tiny baby sneezed.
Whit that Jo laughed, looking slightly more convinced.
- We will kid-prof the loft, and take courses, even though I already know how to change diapers – He joked, making Jo burst on laughter – We'll buy baby books, and read them, and I'll bring Callie to build the crib if I'm unable to do it.
- What if I don't know how to give love?
Alex mouth formed an O due to surprise – You want me to beat you, don't you?
- It took me too long to say it to you – She looked down again – What if I don't say it enough? What if the baby grows up thinking I don't love him?
Alex laughed, before embracing his scared girlfriend and laying down with her in his arms – You show how much you love, Jo – He removed some of her hair from her face, making eye contact with her – This baby – And he placed his hand softly on her belly – Will know how much both her parents love him or her.
- I'm still scared… - She whispered in Alex ear.
- As long as I know parents never stop being scared, but learn that fighting together, the feeling isn't as overwhelming. Starting by sharing it.
Jo smiled, slightly, hugging him tighter – It must be true, I'm not that terrified anymore.