Research the Soul

Silence.

It's never felt so… what's the word? Hollow? Painful? No… none of these words described the silence that she felt at that moment. It didn't feel like it was aching to wreck her apart and tear her down, nor did it feel like it was empty and invisible.

Feel.

What an odd word, wouldn't you agree? It's such a simple lexeme, yet it can describe so much emotion.

Hate…

Excitement…

Confusion.

Emotions are so complicated, aren't they? They're so intricate and surreal… Let a small feeling like anger get out of control, and it controls you— consumes you whole. The sad thing about it all is that sometimes… you won't even be aware of what's happening until the damage is done.

Yeah, that's right.

Len, he's filled with it. That bloodlust and hunger… even vampires can drown in such nugatory emotions like humans do. Sometimes, the feelings that possess them are even worse.

I suppose. Wait… Len's gone! That means I can get out of here and go home. Why the hell didn't I think of that before?

Rin attempted to get her legs to respond, but they didn't. Somehow, it felt almost as if the bottom half of her body was immobilized.

Breathe, Rin. Breathe. C'mon, you can do it.

After minute or so, she heaved herself up, slightly staggering when she stood. The blonde forced her muscles to work and stumbled to the nearby egress. Her breaths were ragged and visible in the night air, like fog in a dimly lit town. She grunted through the uncomfortable feeling in her gut— no fucking thanks to Len— and pushed on, panting when she finally reached the egress. Rin grasped the door handle tightly— more than she probably should— and yanked on it.

It didn't budge.

Oh, how stupid am I? Of course the shitty, ice cream fucked-up vampire would lock me up.

Still trembling and shivering, Rin began to ransack through the adjacent furniture, cabinets, and anything else she could get her hands on. Her fingers were slipping through every nook and cranny, desperate to seek out the key to her escape. Despite her concentration zooming in on the key's whereabouts, it didn't stop her from hissing and cursing out Len. Her eyes flashed with animosity, and she felt as if she was ready to torture the vampire, even though he had left her alone for about a half an hour already.

Damn it, damn it… where the fuck did that golden bitch hide the key? C'mon, c'mon, I don't want to stay here any longer. Fuck you, asshole. Fuck you! Damn it, just curse you and your fucking cute face! Bastard… you better pray to God that I don't find that freaking key, 'cause if I do, I will shove a knife in those big blue eyes!

If you're so keen on revenge, then perhaps you'd consider taking up on the offer?

Not now. Do you always have to show up when I least need you?!

Why do you reject yourself, Rin? Let yourself go and be free.

No! I'm fine the way I am! Won't you ever get that?! Besides, I don't fucking trust you!

Yet you're trapped here. Isn't taking up this offer a risk worth taking? After all, you don't have anything to lose… Could it be that you are afraid?

No way in hell am I scared! I don't want to, that's why!

Or perhaps you're concerned that something bad will happen?

Something bad will come of it.

What makes you so sure?

Haven't you heard? Every so-called deal has it's cons.

"Chicken nuggets! Where in the name of McDonald's did he hide the goddamn key?"

Maybe he doesn't use one. He is a sparkle fairy, so it wouldn't surprise me if he didn't use such a mere thing like this when he's so strong. But then again, he can't even open a door in his own house, so I'm probably exaggerating him.

Now I finally understand how the fuck Edward knows where Bella lives. He's a creep, just like this bimbo. I mean, who the fucking fuck goes around and gets pissed off when a girl wears a simple T-shirt like that? I mean, yeah, it does have SHINee on it— and in a questionable manner— but c'mon… he didn't need to act like my shirt was promoting Satan or some shit. Geez, this fucker has some serious psychological issues to fix.

After three or four hours— darn it, I'm losing count of the time— Rin gave up and trudged upstairs to rest. As she laid on her bed, twisting and turning for what seemed like another hour, she decided to relax her muscles and stare at the ceiling. The luxurious, silky mattress did little to ease her anxiety, she couldn't help feeling a bit uncomfortable sleeping with such a soft material. The bed she had home, though expensive, were not as high quality as this one was, and because she had been so used to the texture of her old one, this one felt… weird.

Fuck, why did I get so tense back then? What does it matter that a bimbo like Len touches me? It's not like it's the first time I've been touched by a boy… Kaito's done that to me many times the past month. Though maybe that's because of the fact that he's only held my hand and hugged me. He never attempted to be so intimate with me. And why am I getting so worked up over this? D-Damn, it shouldn't feel so… Shit, Rin, don't you dare finish that thought. Don't you dare do it.

The troubled teen sat up, pushing the bed sheets off of her upper body. She stared at the mirror across from her bed and sighed, feeling the tension slightly ease.

One, two, three, four… Breathe. That's what Mother would always tell me to do whenever I get frustrated. Just relax and breathe, she'd say. But I feel so tense… so stressed.

Mother… it's almost your birthday, isn't it? Just four more days and you'll be thirty-two. Even though it's been about… I don't know, three or four years since you've gone away, I still miss you. I wonder what it's like for you now. Are you smiling in heaven? Are you happy? Are you sad? I miss you, and it's so unsettling that Father acts like you're gone temporarily— as if you'll suddenly come bouncing home again with a smile on your face. Then again, Father probably understood the gist of the entire situation all along… maybe he knows even more about the situation than I do. After all, there's something wrong with me. My memories of your death weren't intact, and on some days, it feels as if you've just died days ago. On other days, however, it feels like you've died for over ten years already.

I don't know anymore… Mother, I miss you. I miss you so much. What happened to you on that day? What made you leave us…?

My… My face is wet?

Hah, looks like I've gotten too caught up in myself again. Mother, you wouldn't have liked to see me crying like this, yet here I am, a fucking mess of tears. Sometimes, I feel like such a horrible kid, and that you wouldn't have liked me if you could see me today. I wonder what you really think of me, Mom? Wish I could figure that out.

Rin wiped her tears away and laid back down, her sniffles racking her slender frame. Even when she closed her eyes, she still cried, as if the action occurred out of stimulus. Or maybe it was out of instinct? Who knows anymore? Her eyes were beginning to turn red, but she didn't care. All she wanted to do was just cry and cry until there was nothing left. She wanted to accept her mother's departure, but no, her stupid heart just had to break apart every time she thought of her passing.

Why? Why did you have to go?

With that, she fell into the sanctuary of torpor.

"…in."

Huh?

Is someone calling me?

Wh-Who are you?

"…ey, Rin."

What?

Why does it hurt?

H-Have I b-been crying again?

"Rin, open your eyes."

I don't want to.

I'm afraid I'll see something bad. I'm afraid that it'll hurt me.

This is how bad things happen sometimes. When you open your eyes, you'll see something that'll scar you, and the only thing you'll want is to go back to sleep and forget it ever happened. If I open my eyes, maybe something bad will happen. I don't want that.

Despite her conflicting thoughts, however, Rin still fluttered her eyes, almost stunned by the astonishing amount of light there was.

Is it morning already?

No… it's too bright. And besides that, I'm not, dare I say it, home. I'm in some kind of house? Maybe my own home? No, that's not it. This isn't my house— it's not this old-fashioned.

"Hello, Rin."

Who… Who are you?

You sound so familiar…

The blonde hoisted herself up, though with some difficulty, as she felt weariness and exhaust weighing her body down. The first thing she noticed was a pulchritudinous, young woman standing before. Her eyes were a soft shade of blue, similar to Rin's own, though it was lighter. The woman— maybe teenager— was attired in a plain, white dress that reached to her knees. Her hair was a lovely hue of gold, and it flowed past her shoulders, long and thick. She was taller than Rin, at least by a couple inches.

"Who… are you?"

"You don't remember me at all?"

The youthful woman was smiling warmly, her calm demeanor matching the ambience of their location. The outlines of her body were soft— almost as if she had merely been a ghost rather than a real person. Then again, maybe she was. Maybe this place wasn't real. Maybe she was just dreaming.

"And after all those promises we've made to never forget each other…"

What?

What are you talking about?

I swear, you sound so familiar.

"Do I know you?"

"Do you think you know me?" she inquired, still gazing at Rin with— what? Anticipation? Anxiety? Hope?

"…No. I don't believe we've met before."

"I had a pretty strong feeling you'd say that. Ah," the blonde sighed, seemingly content with Rin's presence, "I really think it's unfortunate, you know, losing your mother like that— especially when she's done nothing wrong, that is."

Huh?

H-How do you know about th-that?

"Just who the hell are you? How do you know about my mother?" she inquired, confused as to how a mere stranger knew such a personal fact.

The stranger's smile didn't waver in the least— if anything, it only stretched further.

"That's the Rin I know, always asking question after question. You're such a curious Alice, aren't you?"

"Quit beating around the bush, and answer my question."

"I know many things about you, Rin. Things that you yourself have forgotten."

What are you talking about?

"Don't understand a thing I'm saying, do you? Confused as to how a stranger knows such a personal thing about your family? Well, I'm afraid to tell you that I can't give you an answer. Sorry, but you'll be the one answering my question this time."

"No, what the fuck were you talking about? Explain something to me here!"

Damn, why are you avoiding my questions? What kind of sick game are you trying to play here?

"I have a little question for you— think of it as being a little soul-researching."

"You're not answering my questions at all, and you're expecting me to answer yours? What makes you think I'm stupid enough to do that?"

The blonde approached Rin, giving her a look akin to amusement, as if she understood the bigger perspective of the situation that the latter didn't.

"Think of it as an exchange— a little game of truth and dare, if you will. Except, of course, that there will be no daring. We'll take turns getting to know each other… Seems fair enough, doesn't it?"

Why?

What's the meaning of this?

"What's the point of all this?"

"It's just a game. Besides, I've been bored for way too long."

So you're just doing this because you're bored? Why the hell should I tell you anything about me? Why the hell should I even bother with you?

"Forget this shit."

Why are you still smiling?

"I can tell you everything you need to know, Rin. I can tell you about that day that you've forgotten about. The day… that you can't ever seem to reminisce."

Mom?

You can tell me about Mom's death?

"Can you?"

"If you answer my question."

"How do I know you're not lying to me?"

"You don't. But you have nothing to lose, don't you? Besides, I'm just asking you a question— can't be that hard, right?"

Hmm… there's something kind of suspicious about you. But I suppose I should hear out your question.

"Fine. Ask away."

"What is the answer to love?"

What?

What kind of question is that?

"Heart?"

"I'm afraid that's incorrect. There's many answers to this question, Rin, but I'm sure you'll get it right."

"How are you so sure?"

"Because it's you, Rin. You know the answer to this better than anyone else. Now, it's time I take my leave."

"Wait. How can I tell you the answer? How can I find you? I don't even know your name."

"You don't need to. You've already found me, and… I'll always be there."

The stranger, still smiling, turned around and walked away. Rin stood there, staring at her departing figure before looking around the vicinity of the residence. It was almost difficult to make out the exact details, as if her eyes had suddenly gone bad, but she could tell that it was a decent place. Somehow, there was a nagging feeling inside of her, as if there was something she was failing to comprehend about this place.

Though I do have to admit that it's odd.

I swear there's something familiar about this place… and her. I can't place my head around it, but there's just something about that girl, and I'm not sure if it's good or not.

"You still haven't told me who you are."

Rin…

Rin bolted up from her bed, ready to attack the thing that interrupted her sleep. When she realized that no one was around her, she relaxed and scratched her head, still feeling a bit tired and sore. She noticed the sunlight's illuminating rays and gave out a small groan. The lack of torpor and the issues the previous night had worn her down more than she'd like to admit. Not to mention the dream she had— it made no sense, but then again, when did dreams ever make sense?

I'm pretty sure that little question doesn't need to be answered anymore. I mean, it is just a dream. Though, I can't believe I took it seriously for a second there.

You want to know who I am?

What— wait, now I know why that voice sounded so familiar. So you're that girl I met. That wasn't a dream?

I'll leave that for you to figure out. As for my name, just call me… Neko N.

Cat N…?

Hee-hee, it's cute, don't you think?

I suppose… Do you have some fetish for cats or something?

I didn't choose that name, you know.

Uh… I wouldn't know. Besides, you suggested that I call you that. I'm suppose it's the name you came up with.

Whether you think I came up with it or not is up to you.

Why don't you ever give me a direct answer?

I don't know. Anyways, did you come up with another answer to my question yet?

Happiness? Family? Friends?

All incorrect.

Why are you asking me this question anyways?

Because… I just want to.

"Grr…"

Don't do that. It's bad for your throat. Unless you plan on joining a metal band.

Whatever. Leave me alone, so I can think.

As you wish.

Darn it. What could the answer to love be? Lover? Boyfriend? Girlfriend? Soul mate? Or maybe I should think outside the box? Maybe the question's a riddle or a metaphor of some sort?

"Good morning, my lady."

"Yah!"

Holy fucking shit! When the hell'd you get here?!

"I apologize about surprising you. I suppose you had a lovely night's rest after such a tiring evening, hmm?"

You… You… Oh, f-fuck…

The events of the previous night came back to Rin, and she blushed at the thought of it. She screamed internally, hating how it extracted such an embarrassing reaction from her.

"F-Fuck you. Oh, fuck you to hell!"

"Where? When? Shall we bring a double-ended dildo with us as well?"

Wh-Why you—

"Do you want me to bend over? You can dominate me if you wish to, love."

"Urgh!"

"Oh, what a fantastic orgasm that was! I never knew you were a she-male!"

"You little motherfucker!"

"You want me to call my mom over? We can have a threesome, you know!"

"How about I shove three dildos up your ass?!"

"Ooh, that's a great idea! Maybe we can invite the bear-eating, fluffy dominatrix and his gay, unicorn-raping futanari over!"

"Fuck…"

"You."

Damn, what the hell did he drink last night?!

"Are you on drugs?!"

"I don't know… It depends on how you look at it. It's twer-king time!"

"Whee, isn't that just exciting?"

"Twerk with me, Rin!"

"I'm not going t— f-fuck yourself, man! Get your ass out of my face!"

"Sure. Anngh… Nngh… Gaghh… Nyaa!"

"Ugh, you're trying to fuck with my mind, aren't you?"

"Y-Yes… Ngahh…Y-Your mind f-feels s-so good… Angh… Oh, m-my sweet J-Juliet…"

"Fuck this shit!"

"Where is the shit? I'll fap to it!"

"...Screw this. I'm so going to stuff onions up your ass."

Futanari - female with male genitalia

Well... I have no regrets! That's all I have to say for this weird chapter. I know, my definition of humor is starting to become weird, isn't it? I just had to make Len get his revenge, and... what better way to do it than throw in weird shit. I hope it's not too peculiar for you guys, and that you can get a laugh or two out of it. I'm going to start doing this more, just 'cause it's fun. I'll probably throw in more SEXXXYYY Len in the next chapter. ^^ And don't worry, no bears or unicorns were harmed when I wrote this.