Thank you to people for reviewing, as usual I have been in two minds about what I've written and comments remind me that other people are enjoying the story. This is a bit of a filler chapter but I'll do better on the next one, promise.

Ta.

Howard came back each day and each day Vince greeted him with a slightly more audible hello and a lingering kiss which made Howard feel like he was back on the cliff edge. On Tuesday he brought in Vince's hair care products - well, the ones that would fit into the overnight bag - clean underpants, and Vince's own pajamas. On Wednesday he brought in Vince's make-up case and on Thursday he brought in Vince's red skinnies, white boots and black blouse in preparation for going home the next day. He also brought in Bounty bars and Vince decided that he now loved Howard even more than he had before.

Each day Howard talked and talked about how he had used to feel and what he had wanted from life and how he'd tried to be casual because he thought that was what Vince wanted. He talked about feeling angry and forgotten and lonely and how the thought of dying alone had just pushed Vince's words from the Tundra more fully into his mind.

Vince watched Howard blink back tears as he talked about his mum bundling him into their car and driving for hours and hours when she finally decided that it wasn't worth the pain to be with a man who loved alcohol more than his wife and child. Howard had hated his dad but he'd hated his mum more for taking him away from his home and his friends and his stuff. He didn't know where his dad was now and worried that he'd died completely unknown and unmourned.

Vince had never known any of it, never guessed, and his heart ached that Howard had never felt able to confide in him. Then again, he'd never confided in Howard either. Being together had always been their escape from the world but now Vince knew he wanted to face the world and shout from the rooftops that he was with Howard and Howard was his and that they were going to be happy.

He was a bit nervous about that last bit. He was good at being positive and smiling and all that but he didn't know how to play happy families. He was pretty sure that Howard didn't know anything about positive relationships either and he was scared that they'd become like his mum and dad way too easily. But he needed to try. Kissing and sitting together was wonderful and it didn't feel like they were turning into monsters. In fact, it felt just as it always had - like Vince and Howard - only with kissing and actually learning about each other.

Gary dropped around each day and on Friday morning announced that he wanted Howard and Vince to come around for dinner.

"Nothing fancy," he told them as the two men gaped at him, open mouthed. "Just me and Gemma and the kids and you and Howard. We'll cook something nice and have a cake."

"But why?" Vince whispered, his voice still tender.

"Well," Gary said slowly. "It's your birthday, Vince. You'll be thirty-two. I've known you twenty-nine years. And in all those years I've never had you over for birthday tea. And it's time that you brought Howard home to meet Gemma and the kids. We need to have a proper family dinner and meet your man, that's all."

Vince didn't want to cry, he'd done far too much of it lately and he was a bit worried about his newly unbandaged eye getting inflamed, but the tears didn't care about his reasoning and fell anyway.

"I don't like celebrating my birthday."

"I know, but you deserve to celebrate it and we should celebrate it, because you're special to us, Vince, and you should know that but I don't think you do."

Gary spoke in his usual soft monotone but Vince heard something behind the words and nodded his head. Howard squeezed his hand and Vince looked over at the man sitting beside him on the bed. Howard was trying so hard, Vince could tell that this relationship was difficult for him, with its many unknowns and lack of boundaries, and yet here he was, making the effort.

Vince swallowed hard. He wanted to be a proper grown-up and this was just another way of proving to himself that he could do it. He nodded.

"Shall we bring a salad or something?"

Gary smiled and beside him he could feel Howard's shoulders shake as he tried not to laugh.

"What?"

"Nothing, Vince," Howard choked and Gary was starting to chuckle now.

"But what?!" Vince whined and the sound of his voice cracking sobered both men.

"It's ok, Vince," Howard told him soothingly, stroking his back until Vince felt a little less tense. "We weren't laughing at you to be mean, it's just..." Howard looked down, searching for words, and Vince tried to be patient.

"It's just that I never thought I'd ever hear you say something so grown up and domestic. I think it's nice. Promise."

Vince scowled but couldn't really be cross. He leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to Howard's cheek, smirking when the other man blushed. Howard liked kissing but still got embarrassed doing it in front of other people, even when it was only Gary.

"Yeah, well, family dinner is... pretty domestic, isn't it?"

Howard grinned sheepishly, echoing Vince's body language with his own.

"I'm afraid I don't really know, little man. I don't have much experience of family dinners to be honest."

"Me neither," Vince mumbled, chewing on his thumb nail. He let his other hand creep into Howard's and felt his skin heat pleasantly when Howard squeezed his fingers in silent answer to his silent plea. They were both a bit rubbish at all of this but it was funny how quickly they were learning - staying sober and having nothing to do each day but say (and listen to) all of the things they'd never been brave enough to say had helped a great deal and Vince thought that with a bit of time they might actually make a go of it. Especially if Howard kept letting him kiss him.

Gary chuckled again and Vince looked up. Gary had been one of his few certainties growing up. Whatever else happened he knew that he could call Gary and not be considered naughty or wrong or weird. He didn't always say much and Vince envied the older man's ability to hide his emotions, but he knew that Gary cared about him. To discover that he considered Vince family made him feel a bit too sentimental and sappy.

"What?" he asked, when Gary's smile grew wider. Gary shook his head.

"I'm just glad you two have sorted things out. Don't screw it up."

They both nodded quickly and Gary left, after telling them to be at the house at five-thirty tomorrow evening. Right now it was time to go home.

...

Vince tried to calm his breathing. His vision in his right eye was a little blurrier than before but he'd looked carefully in the mirror before they left the hospital and it wasn't noticeable. He'd been twice as careful with his hair and make-up and had spent fifteen minutes checking and re-checking his clothes before Howard had gotten fed up with him and dragged him away from the bathroom mirror. And now here he was, standing outside the hospital doors while Howard brought the car around. He looked fine, he kept telling himself, but he still felt as though he was being stared at. Could other people tell that he was damaged? Or was it possible to tell just by looking that he wasn't single anymore? He didn't know and he hated not knowing what people were thinking about him, especially when he was on his own. He needed Howard to hurry up and come back.

Tucked in the make-up case by his side was the notebook the nurse had found him and the coloured pencils she'd procured from the children's ward. He didn't know when he was going to give it to Howard, at the same time he told him he loved him, he supposed.

Oh, God, that was scary. He wanted to do it but he had no clue how to bring it up. He'd tried to think of a plan for how to tell Howard everything but all he'd managed was a herd of plan ponies and they hadn't been any help at all, they'd been too busy checking out each others boots. He ruffled his hair nervously and gave an audible sigh of relief when Howard pulled up in the van, grinning like a great dope.

"Get in quick, you little tart," he said through the open window and Vince piled his stuff in the back before jumping into the passenger seat beside him.

"Why, what's the problem?" Vince asked when he'd shut the door and was struggling with the stubborn seatbelt.

"You're too attractive to be standing out on the roadside like that," Howard replied as he pulled back out onto the road. "You look like a Jaquettie commercial waiting to start. It's not decent. I need to get you home where other people can't gawk at you."

"You want to shut me away, is that it?"

"I want the only person looking at you to be me, little man. At least for the next twenty-four hours. I want to... make up for lost time..."

Vince grinned and ran his tongue across his teeth, enjoying the way it made Howard blush and grip the wheel a bit more tightly. He was with Howard, properly with Howard, and somehow he reckoned that nothing could go wrong now. And he couldn't wait to get home and show Howard some of the things he'd learnt since he was fourteen, this was going to be genius.