Tali

"Try it now," Tali yelled from her spot in one of the Neema's many small crawlspaces.

The board she had just been working on came back to life. She waved her omnitool over it to check connections, power draw, and efficiency. Satisfied with the results, she slowly worked her way out of the narrow hole. Her chief engineer, an older male quarian, was waiting for her as she stood.

"Keelah, Tali. I wish I had an entire engineering crew of you," he said.

She smiled at him. "I take it the air scrubber is working again, Jeevan?"

"Working again?" the man said enthusiastically. "It hasn't worked this well since we got it twenty years ago. How do you do it?"

Tali shrugged her shoulders before realizing the quarian wouldn't understand the gesture. "It's simple really. Just find the problem then fix it or develop a work around."

"Well, your 'simple' fixes make me really wish you didn't split your time between being a ship and a combat engineer. I have a dozen other problems I need to take care of, and you've seen what I have to work with. We could really use you here full time."

She waved her hand dismissively. Again, she belatedly remembered that it was another motion not used by quarians. She picked up many gestures from her time among humans, an oddly animated race considering they didn't have to hide their faces behind opaque glass. Jeevan and the other engineers were used to her odd movements, even finding some to be amusing, but Tali still received many discouraging glances when they leaked into her off duty hours.

"You had great engineers before I got here, and you know it. Leeto can fix anything I can."

"True, but the stuff he fixes doesn't work as well as yours. Then there's Fica who can barely do daily maintenance. Her idea of a fix is slapping a load of omnigel on it and hoping it holds."

"That's not true," Tali said in her crewmate's defense. "She may not be the best, but she's capable. Besides, you don't keep her around to fix things. She knows drive core equations like the buckles of her suit."

Jeevan snorted noncommittally. The quarian didn't like to be wrong, so it was about as good as an affirmation that Tali was going to get.

"Well at least no one can be as bad as Kirr," he finally said.

Tali couldn't argue with that. Kirr was a young quarian, still a few years from taking his Pilgrimage. He was very smart and very knowledgeable about machines, which was why he was placed in engineering, but the boy was clumsy to a fault. Almost everything he did needed to be either redone or repaired. Tali had felt sorry for the young one, so she took him under her wing to help settle the boy.

"Admit it, Jeevan. He is getting better."

The quarian sighed. "It's a good thing too. I don't think the ship could survive him getting any worse."

She laughed before feeling the long day's effects. Tali was just finishing her scheduled shift and a half when three of the five air scrubbers went down. The first two were easy to fix, but the last one took much longer. Her eyelids grew heavy, and she had to shake her head to stay awake.

Jeevan noticed. "Go on, and get some rest, Tali. If anyone has earned it today, it's you."

She nodded. "You should too. You've been here almost as long as I have."

"I will. Just got wait for Fica to get here so I can explain what I would like to see done in the next shift."

"Okay. Good night, Jeevan," she said and left the engineering bay.

Tali slowly made her way back to her small habitation cube. The Neema was fairly quiet, being on its sleep cycle. While never truly still, the roar of the ship died somewhat as the majority of their population closed their eyes.

She missed the quiet. In the first few months being back in the Fleet, Tali found it difficult to sleep with the constant noise. She had gotten used to the silence and was never able to adjust back. Even now, the only way she could get her much needed rest was to shut off her suit's auditory pickups.

Truthfully, being on the Normandy ruined the Migrant Fleet for her. She missed studying its advance drive core and systems. She missed all the space in the ship even though it was supposedly small for a frigate. She missed the challenges that came with working with a Spectre.

Most of all, Tali missed him.

She had thought she prepared herself for the disdain she knew her race faced in the larger galaxy, but she was not ready for what she found. She could count on one hand the number of non-quarians that were helpful to her on her Pilgrimage, and over half of them were humans, including Shepard.

Shepard went far and beyond being merely helpful though. He protected her from Saren's agents, and welcomed her to his crew. Showing his tendency to perform the impossible, Shepard somehow made Tali feel comfortable on a ship full of strangers. He made the Normandy feel like home.

The best thing Shepard gave her was a chance to prove herself. She had lived her entire life with the stigma of having an admiral for a father. She had to be better than everyone else, or she would be a failure. Everyone saw the great man that led them when they looked at her.

But, when Shepard looked at her, she could tell he saw her, not her father. He just wanted the best from her and not some preconceived notion of what she should be. It was the first time she ever felt like that.

It wasn't that he didn't know about the expectations either. When Tali explained it to him, Shepard understood completely. He joked with her one time, calling her royalty, but never mentioned it again. To him, she was just Tali'Zorah, the combat engineer with an affinity for shotguns. She missed that.

She missed Shepard.

When she heard about the Normandy's and Shepard's fate, Tali broke down. She hadn't cried so hard since her mother died over seven years ago. If it wasn't for Auntie Ran's support, she doubted that she would have been able to move from her habitation cube for a week. The older quarian woman was able to make her focus on the good memories. It eased the pain, if only slightly.

Once she heard about a memorial for her late friend, Tali went to the captain of the Neema, saying that she would need permission to attend. It was not a request but a statement of fact. She would be there even if she had to steal a shuttle to go. The captain wisely agreed to the demand.

It was nice to see most of the crew from the Normandy at the ceremony, especially those from engineering. The feeling was soured by the missing faces, however. She was acutely aware of the absence of one particular engineer, Caroline Grenado. The woman was instrumental in making Tali feel welcomed in her new surroundings and ended up being a very close friend.

It was only a few minutes into Commander Shepards's funeral before Tali had to turn off her external speakers to sob without alerting those around her. She obviously didn't hide it well enough when she felt a five-fingered hand on her shoulder. She looked to see her old boss, Chief Engineer Adams, giving her a small, sad smile. She nodded her thanks for his consoling touch.

Once she made it back to the Migrant Fleet, Tali slowly worked her way back into quarian society, very slowly. It had been over two years now, and she still used human gestures. She didn't know if she could ever truly return.

Tali shook her head in an ineffective attempt to clear away the thoughts. When she made it back to her small home, she turned off her external auditory sensors and lay on her small cot. She could still feel the ship underneath her and did her best to ignore it. Her long work schedule quickly caught up to her, and Tali fell asleep.

It didn't last nearly long enough. Her well-deserved rest was interrupted by a quarian standing over her and lightly shaking her. Once she blinked the sleep from her eyes, she realized that the mouthpiece of the quarian's suit was flashing, meaning that he was speaking to her. She quickly turned her pickups back on.

"-finally awake," the older man said.

Tali instantly recognized the voice, mentally kicking herself for making him wake her in such a fashion. She quickly stood.

"Admiral Gerrel! I'm – I'm sorry that you had to enter without permission. And see me like this."

It was immensely disrespectful to enter a house cube without consent. The quarians were a very community driven race due to their circumstances, but they were not without their social rules regarding privacy.

"Please, Tali. Think nothing of it as long as you forgive my intrusion," he replied. "When I went looking for you in Engineering, they explained about your long shift. It doesn't surprise me that you were unresponsive."

She felt her face warm with embarrassment. Her deep sleep was not the only reason she didn't hear him.

"Of course, Admiral. So, you were looking for me?" Tali asked.

"Yes. I have a mission for you, if you are willing."

"But I already have a mission. I'll be heading to Haestrom in a week and a half."

Tali wondered how he could have forgotten that. Admiral Xen's proposed mission to study the abnormal behavior of the Dholen star needed approval by all five admirals to be carried out.

"Of course. I remember. How can I forget when it was your father who recommended you to lead it?"

Her eyes widened. She hadn't heard that.

The admiral chuckled. "Yes, it surprised me as well. Tali, you should know that he has the greatest confidence for your abilities."

That doesn't make up for him ignoring me, she thought before she realized she was doing it. She reminded herself that he was responsible for the entire fleet, and sacrifices needed to be made. But the excuses sounded just as hollow now as they did when Auntie Ran told them to her years ago.

"But I digress, he continued. "The mission I have will not interfere with Haestrom."

"Okay. What is it?"

"We have lost contact with one of our's that is on Pilgrimage, Veetor'Nara nar Sulaco. He is a bit anxious if those close to him are to be believed. He is a nervous sort, especially around unfamiliar crowds. That may be why he chose to spend his Pilgrimage in a small human colony called Freedom's Progress. We believe that you would be the best to see what happened to him and bring him back if it is needed."

Tali digested this information. From what the admiral had given her, it was a simple recon mission with the potential of running into some trouble. Any squad of marines could have handled it. So why come to her, especially when she already had a mission?

"May I ask a question?" she tentatively asked.

"By all means."

"Why me? I'm sure there are others that could do this."

Gerrel nodded. "True, and we would send one of them if you decline. But you have garnered some fame with humans after your work with their first Spectre. We believe that your presence will make those on the colony more receptive of your squad's intrusion."

Tali tried to keep her eyes from narrowing. It wasn't the first time someone tried to use her status in some fashion, but this was the first time they used her reputation in the human race. It made her sick to her stomach to use the human expression. Shepard wouldn't have used her like this.

But Shepard isn't here, a solemn thought reminded her.

"I'll do it, Admiral," she said simply.

"Excellent. You will be leading a squad commanded by Prazza'Kilam. A shuttle will come to the Neema in two days' time to take all of you to Freedom's Progress. I will be sure to forward you all the pertinent information we have on Veetor and the colony. I wish you luck, Tali."

With that, he left her living space. Tali could hear the hustle and bustle that accompanied midmorning on the Neema through the thin walls. Even with the droves of quarians just outside, she felt very much isolated and alone.

As she laid down in a hopeless attempt to get more sleep, only one thought continued to cross her mind.

Keelah, I miss Shepard.

Author's Note:

While writing this chapter, I discovered that, even though my favorite LI in Mass Effect is Liara, I really enjoy writing Tali. There is just something about her that makes her easy to work with. I hope that doesn't mean the she is acting OOC. That is the last thing I want to do. They may do different things in my stories that aren't covered in the games, but it should never be outside the characterizations we as fans have come to like.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Feel free to review and tell me everything you liked or hated about it.