Author's Note: We are now getting into the hurt/comfort and...the triumvirate part of this story! Which is the whole point of this twisted path I'm taking you on! I imagine you were quite skeptical when I said that was the focus, but here we are! I hope you are enjoying the ride!

Real/true scenes that occurred on the Enterprise and on Re'an V will be separated by asterisks and "previously on the Enterprise" or "previously on Re'an V." The middle section is one such scene and represents a true part of the mission and also hints to what Jim could be thinking about in his catatonic state. It is NOT a flashback. These real scenes are for YOUR benefit as a reader to see what really went on. I will be revealing other parts later on as more unfolds.

I am taking liberties with how melds work...so...forgive me if there is canon for that, but I am using as much common sense as I possibly can for that plot point.

DLB48 is the wonderful beta reader who has generously helped me to Spock-ify things, which is, in my opinion, a very difficult character to pin down. Thank you!

Thank you for reading! I must express my great appreciation for those who are reviewing- including guests reviewers. Thank you! As you can tell, I am not known for short chapters. HA! I have tried that and in the process I end up frustrated and miserable about many things, including the flow of the story. And no one can truly write when they are frustrated. Anyways, hope you enjoy what's next! And Merry Christmas! I'm sure my next update will be after that, but pushing more towards the following week.

Two days later, McCoy went through the motions on his sickbay rounds, all the while feeling the pull of one particular patient in the private room nearby. In the thirty minutes he had been apart from Jim the troublesome infection could have worsened. Rationally, he knew that his nurses would alert him to any problem, but in reality he couldn't bear to leave Jim alone, without his personal physician, one Leonard McCoy. He clenched his jaw and decided to pass the next two patients on to M'Benga.

Turning quickly, McCoy's step lurched, the room spinning around him. He tripped, nearly ramming his hip into the corner of a metal drawer. A hand gently clutched his arm as he righted himself.

"How much sleep are you getting, Leonard?" A woman's voice whispered discretely.

"Enough, Christine," he muttered under his breath, customary scowl fixed on his face.

"Really, doctor? You would scold the captain if he did this. Maybe some of the planet's sunlight would do you some good."

"Shore leave? With Jim like this?"

"That's my point exactly. You're going to run yourself ragged even before he comes out of this."

"Chris, I can't leave him. There's too much work to do and no answers."

"Leonard, you know that you are no help to anyone in this condition. The captain would want you to take a break to clear your head. Commander Spock has not left the captain's bedside today and Dr. M'Benga and I are capable of managing his care."

"He said my name."

"I know," she said gently. "and you have to trust that he'll say it again. He needs you, but maybe it's time to try a different voice. Dr. Marcus is on your list of approved visitors and is ready to come. Some time away and a short rest on the beach may be just the thing to revitalize you."

As tempting as a beach nap sounded, McCoy couldn't bear to leave the ship. However, handing Jim's care over to Christine briefly and allowing Dr. Marcus to visit was more reasonable. Jim had been enthralled by the Re'an missile. Maybe that would spark his awareness.

"He was quite impassioned by the damn symbol on the missile, wasn't he? Good thing, too. That obsession allowed that self-sacrificing idiot to discover the Re'an's ulterior motive early on, or we wouldn't be in this mess." McCoy attacked each word with a heavy dose of sarcasm, and rather than feeling relief, his spirits sank even lower. Jim had acted honorably and performed his duty, as he only would. McCoy could not expect less. Now it was his duty to care for the captain's broken mind and body.

Christine refused to budge. Finally, McCoy relented with a sigh.

"Fine. I can spare two hours, but I will remain on the Enterprise. I simply cannot give up anymore time than that. HQ has given me two more weeks to straighten this out."

Christine gave a small smile. "We are all rooting for him. He'll come around and when he does, you need to be more relaxed. He'll see right through you."

"Chris, he can't see." Each word fell deadened from McCoy's lips. "Our tests proved that."

She flushed. "You know what I am talking about."

He did, and he didn't know if it was possible for him to maintain any sort of facade. He couldn't help but wear his heart on his sleeve. "Yesterday, Lieutenant Uhura suggested we spoon feed the truth to him."

"What are you implying, Leonard?"

"The Re'an have been destroyed, by their very own hands before we could help them with an alternative. The manifestations told him Prince Lequa is his new father, and now Lequa is dead. The only survivor is Soona. This news will devastate him, no matter how badly they have treated him."

McCoy could not help but think of Spock, one of the now numbered Vulcans, who would understand this hardship of Jim's more than anyone. And if there was a bond, how much more that would help Jim.

"But, he will still be our captain," she said.

He wouldn't admit it to anyone, but Christine showed more optimism than he did right now. His hope that Jim would recover waned overnight as the weight of Uhura's knowledge crashed down on him. Even the possibility that Spock could somehow reach Jim through a bond no longer gave him much hope. Spock was greatly fatigued, and although he attempted to project thoughts of the truth of the Re'an mission, the chosen one's barrier in Jim's mind seemed more powerful than Spock. It did not bode well with the Acting Captain.

McCoy sensed her need for reassurance but was unable to provide it. "We're doing everything we can, but much of it will be out of my hands. I don't understand the Vulcan mind meld mumbo jumbo, but I'm putting my hope in it now. If Spock truly established a bond between their minds, it had better become clear soon. Uhura is working with our best psychiatrists to develop a plan to help Jim, to help Spock help Jim. If the impressions Spock gained from the melds hold true, Jim may be much more compliant than his usual self. We don't want to exploit that, but expect that he will fully cooperate with any therapy we attempt."

McCoy left unsaid his belief that a co-operative captain was the only good result of the disastrous Re'an meld.

**********previously on Re'an V*********

"Well, this isn't creepy or anything," muttered McCoy. He held a phaser at one of the two exits in the control room, trying to ignore the seven dead Re'ans who lay scattered and in their own blood. Spock quirked an eyebrow in response, pausing only briefly from his task. "They killed each other, even the civilian. We slipped in and weren't a threat. Why the hell would they do that?"

"Disorder and violence," Spock said evenly. "They are confused."

"And Jim's memories are supposed to help them with this?" McCoy tightened his grip on the weapon."God Almighty, if they only knew."

"They will soon," Spock replied without blinking.

"And that's supposed to make me feel better?"

"It was not spoken to benefit your health, doctor."

"You can't take much longer, Spock." McCoy watched both doors warily from behind a larger console.

"It is an advanced algorithm."

"If they know we're outta of our cell, they'll kill 'im." McCoy's accent thickened.

Spock straightened and set dark eyes upon him. "Dr. McCoy, I could work faster in silence."

"Or, ya could send me along. Maybe I'll -"

"Negative," Spock bent over the console.

McCoy scowled. Of course he was right. They had to work together, especially now that they knew the Re'an were incredibly unstable. Working together they had easily stunned the guard entering their cell as McCoy feigned illness, convincing the Re'an that the antidote had failed. That was so simple it almost scared the doctor, but this, not even knowing where Jim was and risking their captain's life? It was the straw that broke the camel's back.

He hedged towards the door, anxious. "Spock, please."

"Doctor-"

"Spock, we need ta find Jim before-"

A steady beep came from the console. McCoy halted.

"Dr. McCoy, as I was saying," Spock glanced up at McCoy. "The shields are down. Security is on their way."

McCoy could have cried. "Let's get our captain."

**********end scene**********

McCoy fled down the corridor. As he had half-hoped and half-feared, Jim's condition had changed while the doctor was away from his side. McCoy charged into sickbay with a burst of energy and renewed sense of purpose after his short respite.

"The shields are down," Jim murmured, eyes closed tightly, hiding him from the world. "Shields down."

"Has he acknowledged he's heard you speaking to him, Dr. Marcus?" McCoy rushed out, peering at the monitors. Jim's brain activity had spiked tremendously. "Nurse Chapel? Anything at all?"

"No, Dr. McCoy."

"How long has he been repeating that?"

"Four minutes, but that's only the eighth time he's spoken the phrase."

"Spock," McCoy frowned, seeing the increase of Jim's heart rate. "Did he see your memory of us sneaking into the Re'an control room?"

"I did not think it was feasible, as I could not penetrate further into his mind." Spock's shoulders couldn't possibly stiffen even more. "However, upon gaining some of my strength back this afternoon, I attempted to project thoughts about our escape."

"That sure sounds like a bond to me," McCoy murmured. "You really did penetrate further than you first thought, Spock."

"I believe you are correct, Dr. McCoy," Spock said in quiet acknowledgement.

"Bones?"

McCoy knew immediately that it was a question spoken free from Jim's catatonic state. After giving Christine a gentle but pointed look, the nurse and Carol scurried from the room before Jim fully awakened.

McCoy glanced down at him as a look of panic appeared on the captain's face. "I'm here, Jim."

"Bones? Spock?" Jim furrowed his brow. "The shields...they're...Bones?

"Yeah, kid." McCoy disabled the stasis around the biobed and proceeded to strap down Jim's limbs. "We're both here with ya."

"Where are you?" Jim's eyes widened, making him appear even more vulnerable. "Where am I?"

"I'm here, right beside ya," McCoy laid his hand on Jim's shoulder. "You're in sickbay."

"Sickbay? I don't know what that...But..." Jim swallowed, eyes darting towards McCoy but never looking straight at him. "I can't see you."

"No," McCoy didn't sugar coat his reply, knowing Jim had to at least acknowledge his blindness. "Ya can't, Jim. Do ya remember what happened?"

"You're accent's too thick. Like it was in that control room. You and Spock." Jim blinked. "You're upset."

The control room. The Re'an control room? It had to be. McCoy briefly shut his eyes in relief. Spock had brought their captain back.

"I'm fine, Jim. Right now, though, we need to talk about you and why you can't see me."

"They blinded me. I know that. I remember."

"I'm gonna fix it."

Jim frowned. "But it was necessary. To teach me. And, I think that I'm...that I'm supposed to be there. Not here."

Necessary? Nausea rolled in waves in McCoy's stomach and his fury reached a new level. Necessary for brainwashing, he silently raged at the intricacies of the Re'an meld.

"No, you need to be here because you were severely injured and they can't fix ya like I can." McCoy exchanged a look with Spock, deeply disturbed as Jim accepted his fate in Re'an fashion and showed no concern over his blindness.

Jim was silent.

"Jim?"

"Then you'll take me back?"

The tension in the room was crushing.

McCoy thanked his lucky stars Jim could not see his face right now - nor Spock's. Guilt then flooded him. Being thankful that Jim was blind? What was he? An idiot just like his heroics-wielding captain? McCoy wiped his eyes and squeezed Jim's shoulder, the action so innate he didn't even remember Jim couldn't feel it until a few seconds later. "When the time comes that you're healed, I'll take you where you need to be, okay?"

"But you're upset with me. You didn't want me in ...in...this place...this place of yours...I'm not sure what sickbay is...but..." Jim furrowed his brow. "You threw me out. It works out for the best now."

Shocked, McCoy stared at Spock, as they both were blind-sighted by this new development.

Jim, who had been here a million times, whose presence in sickbay was more familiar to McCoy then his own mother's first name...didn't know 'sickbay'? More nauseated than ever, McCoy had to take a moment to collect himself.

"Jim, I'm sorry," McCoy said haltingly. His heart wrenched in two at Jim's confusion but even more as he prepared to play along with Jim's misconceptions regarding their friendship. "You don't know how sorry I am."

"Bones, I needed you," Jim whispered. "You never came. The Re'an did."

McCoy was sitting as close to Jim as he could, stroking the captain's head before those hurtful words escaped Jim's mouth. "But I'm here now, Jim, and so is Spock."

"Spock. I thought I heard him earlier. Bones," Jim said hoarsely. "I...I'm...sorry."

"No, I'm the one who's sorry," McCoy interrupted. Remembering what was best for Jim, he didn't exactly clarify what he was sorry for. "For everything, Jim."

"But..but you're angry with me, and it's my fault," Jim's panic-filled eyes fixed on a spot beyond McCoy's shoulder. To McCoy's horror, Jim had somehow managed to move his body away in the leeway the straps had given him, shirking in his fear. Jim gulped a breath. "I'll...I'll talk about whatever you want. Just...please, don't yell at me. Please, Bones-"

Heart sinking once again, McCoy stopped him as gently as he could. "Let's talk about that later, Jim, alright?"

"Okay," Jim said in a small voice.

He hated the compliance Jim was exhibiting, but McCoy had no choice. He had to direct the conversation the best way for Jim's mental health - and Spock looked like he'd just swallowed a Gorn. "Right now, that isn't important. I'm here and I'm not leaving ya. Spock isn't leaving you, either."

"I've been so alone." Jim's face scrunched up in confusion. "I'm...I've been..I'm not sure what exactly. I can't seem to be able to think all too clearly. Some things are a little confusing. Prince Lequa will explain to me once you take me back."

The world caved in around McCoy. He was certain now that Jim did not remember his captaincy. He certainly didn't remember his crew. The old Jim would have inquired about his crew immediately.

His brother...his captain...the man he went in the black with...was gone.

McCoy drew a shaky breath. "I know your mind's a bit hazy. Cluttered, even, and that may be how you feel for awhile but no one is going to harm ya, Jim. I promise we will help your mind clear, alright?"

"Okay. But, I need to see them, Bones. They're...we're okay, right? They took what they needed from me and are alive? They must be waiting for me, Bones."

"I know you've been alone, Jim." McCoy bravely ignored the mention of the Re'an. It was a battle for Jim that he was not going to lose and he proceeded to give something familiar to Jim that the Re'an never gave Jim - a southern doctor's comfort. "But I gotcha now, Jim. In fact, I'm holding your head against my chest, my hand ruffling your hair."

Jim didn't answer, and McCoy watched as the captain struggled to speak. McCoy realized what went unsaid between the two of them was running through Jim's mind - that Jim couldn't feel a single thing and Jim knew that McCoy knew very well that Jim couldn't feel.

"You usually stroke my head when everything's gone wrong and I need you to fix things. Like that? Are you combing your fingers through my hair to comfort me?" Jim whispered, the wariness in voice unmistakable.

"Yeah," McCoy gruffed, barely kept his own tears in check as his hand rubbed Jim's smooth, shaven head. The lack of the captain's locks stung. "Just like that."

"Bones, but I don't...they took..." Jim's voice trembled, as if he'd scraped the last bit of tenacity he had to share one more thing that the Re'an had done to him. "They took it all, Bones. I don't have any...any hair...left. It's gone."

McCoy's heart caught in his throat at the crestfallen expression on Jim's face and then the hint of despair in Spock's eyes. It wasn't about the hair...

"It's gone. It's all gone," Jim whispered, his shoulders rigid, battling a sob he tried to hold at bay. It was the Re'an way, acceptance of the very way the wind blew. No questioning. No tears. None, because the peace in their society made certain the beings never required those things.

McCoy swallowed painfully. It wasn't the hair...it wasn't that. It was about Jim. Jim knowing something had changed about him - but having no idea what that was.

Spock closed his eyes, and if McCoy didn't know any better, was projecting something to Jim. Peace? Calmness? As Jim's shoulders fell and he let out a slow breath, McCoy understood. The bond between Jim and Spock had strengthened but by how much, he didn't know.

"I d...don't...understand what happened...to me, Bones...Spock...it's gone..." Jim struggled to speak, eyes heavy and fluttering shut.

"It's all the same to me, Jim," McCoy took a deep breath. "Hair or no hair. It doesn't matter. What matters to us is this: you're in my sickbay, safe, and you're still as strong as ever. We will help you work through this. I promise. No one is leaving ya."

McCoy silently vowed that Jim would be who he once was, even if it was the last thing he did in the forsaken black.

A grimace flashed across Jim's face.

"Jim? What's wrong?" McCoy frowned.

"'M tired," Jim mumbled

"It's okay to be tired. You've been through a lot recently."

Jim mumbled an incoherent reply, and McCoy could not catch each laborious word. "You want to know if...you can sleep?" He guessed, disbelief racing through his mind that Jim felt the need to ask permission to do so.

"Mm hmm," Jim let out a long sigh.

"Sure, buddy. Go right ahead," McCoy gently replied. Jim's breath evened and he soon slumbered, seemingly exhausted by his brief reemergence into the real world.

The commander continued in his focused silence. McCoy furrowed his brow for a moment while an idea twisted in his mind. He didn't know what to think of it and when Spock finally opened his eyes, he asked quietly, "Spock. That was you, wasn't it? Making Jim fall asleep?"

Spock nodded. "Yes."

"Why?" McCoy asked incredulously.

"While exploring the potential of the bond between us, it became evident that I could do so."

"What? You've got to be joking. Spock, you're toying with him? For the love of-"

"You misunderstand," Spock interrupted. "He was receptive to our bond even if he himself did not recognize it. Based upon the course of the discussion, I concluded that sleep would benefit the captain at this time and therefore I directed his brain to cause his sleepiness. When he did not appear to protest to that and the Re'an barrier did not oppose my invasion, I continued to bring him to that point. Doctor, if I can consistently and assertively utilize the bond's strength, it will aid in dissolving the Re'an barrier."

"By demonstrating dominance?" McCoy's anger swelled. "By manipulating Jim?"

"Although I would not describe it that way...yes. Doctor, I do not take this lightly."

"Neither do I," McCoy snapped. "I can think of a million reasons to stop you. For one, now you're changing the dynamic of your relationship with Jim even more. Without his consent!"

"You raise two concerns, doctor." Spock arched a brow. "Do you want the captain to return to us, or would you prefer that we allow him to remain but a shell of himself? In his current state he barely remembers the man he was as captain while striving to become something - someone - that he is indeed not, nor is he capable of satisfying that compulsion."

There was no question McCoy wanted Jim to return to them. It was the cost that was troubling. With difficulty, McCoy swallowed his fear of the repercussions. Spock was right; this was most likely the only way to get their captain back. When he considered what Jim would do if he were in their shoes, he believed it would be the same.

"Is he still there, Spock? He didn't even question the well-being of his crew. Not a mere mention."

"I saw remnants of who he is and the now desolate places devoid of what he has been forced to shroud." Spock said simply. "Since I saw much of him during the earlier melds with Jim, I believe those pieces are hidden and closely guarded by the Re'an barrier, but not taken by the chosen one."

McCoy stared at Spock, hardly able to voice his concerns. "The crew? His ship?"

"He has forgotten he has a crew, doctor, but he knows his friends."

"And...Jim?" McCoy couldn't breathe. "His captaincy?"

Spock's eyes flickered. "The manifestations clearly portray him as a captain. However, when he was awake, non-catatonic, and still unaware of his command, I can only surmise that the chosen one buried this particular memory deep inside Jim's mind. While forgotten, I believe it can be restored with care once the Re'an barrier is eliminated."

"What's your plan?" McCoy saw it in his expression. A calculating determination that never failed the commander before. The longer Jim remained unfeeling, uncaring and passive, the more removed from the captain of a starship he would become and the more difficult it would be to reach the real Jim. Spock had to take decisive action sooner than later, before all hopes of reaching the captain was lost. "If you could provoke him to sleep, your strength must be returning and you will soon be able to do more for him."

Spock replied with the last answer McCoy ever expected to hear from a Vulcan. "I will use this bond to teach Jim how to feel, doctor. It is the most logical thing for me to do."

A/N #2: Jim is very damaged, and as we continue you will understand more and more the negative effects the meld had on Jim. There are many. One scene like this cannot reveal everything.

Sadly, captain and anything relating to that has been stripped from Jim and pushed behind the Re'an barrier, leaving barren memories. As a kindness to Jim the author is letting the 'manifestations' in his mind be mostly vague for now, although they ARE what he believes. Jim is very vulnerable and must go through a period of relearning and rediscovery. ...but the good news is this wonderful bond with Spock, even though Jim himself is unaware with it. The bond will priceless as Jim is rehabilitated..