18.
The wedding was only two days away.
Ianto was out in the garden putting the finishing touches on the garden borders when he heard the doorbell. With a muttered curse he rose and brushed the dirt off his knees as he walked up the deck steps and into the house.
He reached the door and opened it with a raised eyebrow, finding Gray waiting nervously on the doorstep. Ianto hesitated for a moment and overrode the urge to slam the door in his face, turning to let him in.
"Ianto, I know we need to clear the air and I…" Gray's sentence was cut off as he felt the cold bite of the trowel blade under his chin.
"Yes. We need to talk, but it' my turn first." Ianto smiled as though this were a normal conversation and Gray saw the man he had once feared.
"My sister loves you. I might say that I don't know why but I love your brother so I can assume you have some redeeming qualities."
"I was concussed the day of the accident and you got in a lucky shot. Idris doesn't know, doesn't need to. Just remember that Idris isn't the only one who knows how to cause you a world of hurt" Ianto stopped and tilted his head as he lowered the trowel.
"Look, I know. I'm an arse, I know." Gray held up his hands and sighed as he tried to apologise. "How about you hit me."
"Huh?" Ianto took a step back and raised an eyebrow as Gray grinned like Jack does when he knows he's being a dick.
"My mother used to tell me to always sit with my hands steepled under my chin while thinking through a problem or something that made me angry so I would be holding my mouth shut, lest I let out a stupid remark I hadn't thought through, "Gray smiled softly and Ianto saw the hope there, "Told me I would at least look intelligent. I was always digging a hole with this gob of mine."
"Look, Ianto I …" Gray wilted and leaned against the door with a sorrowful look, so like Jack that Ianto felt himself yielding.
"Come and have a cuppa, we'll talk about the rights and wrongs of things if you like" Ianto finally offered and Gray looked up with renewed hope.
As they sat nursing the coffees Ianto waited patiently for Gray to find the words he needed to explain himself.
"I just … I've never been a Dad and I never … I mean …" Gray flapped his hands and sighed again.
"You never thought it could make you so insane?"
"Yeah" Gay laughed softly, "I love Davie and Meme, don't get me wrong but my little princess, my Rory, she …I would die for her, kill for her without a second thought for the rest of the world. I would let it all burn for her."
"Yeah." Ianto smiled whimsically, "First time I saw my poor little Walter, all alone and motherless … I wanted to get a gun. A big gun, and strap him to my chest forever."
Gray laughed and rubbed his face, "I know I went so far over the line the last few times we've talked that it's not even visible on the far horizon but I really am sorry."
"Look. I love Jack. I never knew there could be such a love. He makes me …" Ianto frowned and thought about it, "… sane and insane all at the same time. I want to climb inside his arms and stay there forever while at the same time hide him from all the things that could hurt us or tear us apart."
"Walter? Wow, he is my heartbeat. No question and little Noah is quickly cementing himself as our wee prince" Ianto smiled and looked at Gray with new eyes.
"You never thought you would have this, did you!" He asked and Gray looked at his hands.
"I know what scum I am" he said softly. "My whole life I've been a disappointment. To my parents, my partners, to Jack. I just … I never want to let her down. I never want her to look at me with disgust or shame."
"You're her Daddy, you will always be a superhero if you play it right" Ianto smiled.
"No. I mean Rhia," he looked up at Ianto with tears forming, "She is so warm and loving and … motherly. My own Mum never hugged me the way she hugs the kids and at night when she hold me I feel... I feel … safe."
"Yeah," Ianto reached out and placed a hand on Gray's arm, "Now you understand me and Jack. Right? I mean he could have anyone, absolutely anyone with that smouldering look he gets. I still can't believe he wants me. Me! The weedy little prick even his own mother didn't love enough to stay around for."
Gray sat staring at Ianto as he digested the conversation. "She died, she didn't leave you."
"She hung herself. Knowing I would be the one to come home from school and look for her. My mother clocked out and left me with an abusive drunk for a father who didn't care which child he hit as long as it screamed loud enough." Ianto snarled, rising from the table to rinse the mugs out, "Ask Rhia some time. Ask her about our agreement. I would let him beat me instead of her and she would never leave me."
Ianto turned but to face Gray who had changed colour to match his name as he stared at the man who would be his brother-in-law twice over.
"It wasn't just his fists. We never told anyone, never! Even my lovely fathers don't know what I suffered at the hands of that … that bastard! I have to live the rest of my life with those memories and even though I lied to Rhia and told her he was just whipping me with his belt when she heard the grunting and screaming she knew, I know she knew what he was doing to me in my bed at night."
Ianto shuddered and Gray rose, crossing to place his hands on Ianto's shoulders and pulling him into an awkward embrace.
"So you see Gray," Ianto muttered into his hair, "she's my perfect girl too. Rhia and I against the world, when she left me for Johnny I thought I would never forgive her. Now I'm expected to give her to you? God, you have no idea the whirlwind you are whistling down if you ever disappoint or hurt her."
"Is that why we've not heard from Johnny for a while?" Gray relaxed his grip and leaned back a bit, "Did you take care of that?"
"Oh, he's still alive" Ianto snorted, "But he now understands the lay of the land. Idris and I were quite clear on that!"
"What have I been missing" Jack asked from the doorway and Ianto wondered how long he had been listening, "Are we having a "Ianto sandwich"?"
Jack rushed forward and plastered himself to Ianto's back so he was surrounded by Harkness charm and Ianto laughed as he leaned back into Jacks arms.
"One thing I will tell you Ianto, that I never thought I would," Gray said softly and Ianto opened his eyes to grin at him, "I always thought my brother had landed the catch, not the other way around."
Ianto coloured and Jack hummed as he watched the blush spread.
"Does she do that?" he whispered conspiratorially to his brother who giggled and nodded.
"Does things to my blood pressure, I tell ya" he stage whispered back and Ianto gave a shout.
"Oi! That's my sister, your little fucking blossom, mate" Ianto growled with a good natured grin, "I'll not have her chaste ways impugned by the like of you ya scurvy dog!"
"Chaste!" Gray screamed with laughter.
The three men laughed as they held on tight, lamenting the woman who ruled all their lives in her pretty pink way.