2
Suddenly noticing my attire I pushed them away.
"Close your eyes!" I cried. "Turn around!"
"Why? What's the matter with you?" Dave cried.
"Just don't look at me!" I yelled using my hands to try and cover both pairs of eyes. Zach was just too damn tall, but obviously saw that I was struggling to reach his eyes, so he quickly turned around, encouraging Dave to do the same.
"Who are you?" Dave demanded to know, his back facing me. "Where did you come from?"
"I must be dreaming." I said. "This is just a dream. It's either a really awesome dream, or a really shitty one, because my two all-time favorite people were just pointing guns at me. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, okay, okay. I'm just going to go ahead and hyperventilate." Which is pretty much what started happening, until Zach came and grabbed me by the shoulders.
"Are you okay?" He asked.
"Don't look at me!" I cried out again.
"Okay, okay." He said lowering his gaze. "I'm not looking. Are you alright?"
"I don't get it." Dave said turning around.
"Don't look!" I yelled.
"Okay, Jesus." He said covering his eyes. "I don't get why we can't look at you. What are you? Like, Medussa or something?"
"I mean if you could just see what I'm wearing…" I muttered.
"Is this some kind of a trick?" Dave asked sounding rather annoyed.
"Why are you embarrassed about what you're wearing?" Zach asked, still not looking.
What a sweetheart, am I right?
"I'm not embarrassed! It's immodest." I said.
"What is this, a convent?" Dave wondered out loud.
"No." I snapped. "I just… am not very comfortable walking around in skimpy bed clothes."
"Then why'd you come to the grocery store in them?" He asked as though I was a moron.
I let out a snort.
"Can I explain this to you when I have some other article of clothing on?" I asked, walking off looking for a section where they might keep robes or something…
Who was I kidding? This was a grocery store, not Wal-Mart. Zach thankfully removed his jacket and placed it on my shoulders, still trying not to look. I put it on and zipped it up. They both uncovered their eyes.
"Look, all I know is that I fell asleep by my window, and I woke up here, okay?" I buried my face in my palms. "Now I don't even know how to wake up from this dream."
"I don't get why you think this is a dream." Dave wondered.
"It has to be! This is not reality!" I began pulling at my hair nervously twisting it around my fingers, until I noticed it was a very pale blonde. My hair had always been dark brown. Frantically I pulled out my ponytail and found that the other half of my hair was black. "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God."
"What? What happened?" Zach asked.
"Oh my God, my hair! What the shit happened to my hair?"
"I was wondering the same thing." Dave said with a chuckle.
"Don't be a jerk, Dave." Zach advised.
"Don't be a bitch, bitch." Dave replied.
"See? This is a dream! My hair is blonde and black. Obviously I've woken up in this TV show, looking like a weird hippie or something!"
Zach scowled.
"Uh… what are you talking about?"
"Listen lady," Dave said. "hasn't anyone ever taught you when you've had one too many?"
"I haven't been drinking!" I cried. "I don't drink."
"Hang on a second." Dave said. "Sorry, but are you telling me you've never had a single drink?"
"Dave, we don't have time for this." Zach said. "Why do you think you're in a TV show?"
"Because it is." I said. "Look, this is a dream, you aren't going to understand."
"This isn't a dream." Zach said sternly.
"Oh, okay." I said sarcastically. "Obviously you wouldn't think so. I'm the one dreaming."
"Look, we can go back and forth on this all damn day, but we gotta get the hell out of here, and we gotta go fast." Dave said preparing his gun again.
"You're coming with us." Zach said. "I know you're probably scared-"
"Duh, I'm coming with you. I'm not stupid. You're Dave and Zach Savage, of course I'm coming with you."
All of a sudden the guns were pointed at me again.
"We never mentioned our last name. How do you know who we are?" Zach asked.
"I told you-"
"If you say this is a TV show one more time," Dave growled, "So help me God…"
We heard a loud noise come from behind.
"Let's just run!" Zach yelled. So they ran and I followed, freaked out by whatever scary shit was after us. Why did I have to dream about scary shit? I mean on one hand, there were the brothers, and on the other, being with the brothers generally meant that something all sorts of evil was after us, not to mention the obvious trust issues these dudes had. It was like the best nightmare ever, or the worst "good dream" in the entire world.
"Wait…" Dave said lifting his hand. We all lined up against the wall, as he peeked over the corner, to see if anyone was coming from the storage room. All of a sudden this image was looking very familiar to me. I had seen this in an episode. It wasn't the same one I was watching with the awesome fight scene.
"Zombies!" I yelled out. Immediately Zach's hand clapped over my mouth, him and Dave exchanging looks I had seen so many times. I was definitely having a negative impact on their mojo. I quickly mouthed a "sorry" the moment I was given the chance as we continued towards the gray double doors. This dream was making me look like a total airhead. Could I wake up already, and have this dream again, except with me begin much smoother?
Once we reached the storage room we quietly made our way to an arsenal of guns and knives I was all too familiar with. But as soon as we were able to reach this safe zone, Dave's gun was pointed at me again. I held my hands up in defense.
"Rude." I muttered.
"Hang on Dave," Zach consoled. "She's could be harmless."
Dave didn't flinch.
"I wanna know how the hell you knew our names." Dave growled.
"Are you serious?" I asked, all kinds of bothered.
"Does my face look like it's in the mood for jokes?" He asked clenching his jaw. "Don't give me any of this TV show crap."
"What do you want me to say? It's the truth!"
Dave clicked his gun and raised it.
"Will it still be the truth when there's a bullet in your head?" He threatened viciously. "I won't think twice about killing you. For all I know you aren't really a teenage girl who got stuck in the freaking zombie apocalypse."
"Go ahead." I said shrugging. "I die in a dream, then I'll just wake up.
"You think this is some kind of joke?" Dave wondered raising his voice. Zach on the other hand tried lowering the gun.
"Wait, Dave. I think she really thinks she's dreaming." He argued to his brother. "I mean she doesn't mind getting shot for crying out loud."
"She could be a demon who's taken some poor girls body." Dave responded. Zach only shook his head.
"She crossed the salt." He said. I looked around, noticing the salt lining the floors and windowsills surrounding us. With a long pause Zach continued. "Listen, man, this is all just a dream to her. She's harmless."
"This is a dream." I argued. I really did not like being talked about like an idiot. Especially if it was amongst these two. "You guys aren't real. This grocery store doesn't exist. Hell, I'm the only real thing about this whole business! I fell asleep in the clothes underneath this jacket—thanks by the way, Zach— and I woke up in the middle of an empty grocery store. So unless I have serious sleep walking issues, and you two are actors playing a very evil trick on me, which I'm pretty sure you're not, considering I've never met either of you in my entire life, this is all a dream!"
The guns were immediately raised in my direction again.
"Oh, come on." I muttered before realizing they weren't pointed at me. I turned around and my incredibly loud voice had attracted a hoard of zombies outside the doors. "Oops." I said my voice in almost a whisper.
"'Oops' is right." Dave said with a glare. Meany. Creeping up to the salt line, Dave and Zach looked at each other ready to go out and fight, when all of a sudden I remembered.
"Wait!" I cried before they could go anywhere. "Don't go out through those doors!"
They both lowered their weapons and gave me a funny look. All of a sudden the story from this episode was coming back to me. There were too many zombies, and they weren't able to fight them all off, and a couple of them followed the brothers out, and something horrible happened that I couldn't remember because I was dreaming.
"Well, why the hell not?" Dave wanted to know.
"Because, there are way too many of them that have gathered up out there. It's going to be hard for you guys to fight them off, and even harder with me to protect." And before Dave could make a smart-ass comment I said, "I don't even want to hear it Dave."
They both raised their eyebrows and gave each other a look. They always gave each other looks.
"How do we know you're not lying?" Zach asked.
"Is there a reason why I would be lying?" I argued.
"We don't know that yet." He replied.
"Look, if you go out those doors, you're going to have a tough time shooting all of them in the brain, even if I don't come with you. When that happens, they are going to follow you outside to where ever it is you parked, and cause some serious damage to one of you."
"Are you saying one of us is going to get bitten?" Dave asked. Bitten. Now I remembered.
"Yes!" I cried. "Yes! Zach gets bitten in this episode, and Dave you're especially angry because those bastards got to your car too!"
"Okay. That I'll believe." Zach replied.
"Hold on, my car?" Dave questioned.
"Yes, you're precious car is going to get a beat down, and your brother is going to get bitten if you don't listen to me!"
Dave stood there for a moment, and took a deep breath.
"I'm going to trust you on this one, and if you're lying to me, I will have no problem using one of my bullets on you, possibly multiple." He stepped away from the door and towards me. "Where do we go?"
"Go out a window. You'll have a better chance fighting them off with all of your weapons on hand."
"But most of our weapons are here."
"Yea, so if you go out through those doors, what are the chances of you guys coming back for these weapons without a fight, and more importantly without one of you getting hurt?" Okay, so now I was sort of building some rapport… I think.
"So," Dave said. "What do you suggest we do?"
"Look, zombies. They're attracted to human scent right?"
"Well considering they want to eat us, yea, I would say they're attracted to our scent." Dave replied.
"Well, then we just have to leave some sort of scent behind, and carry the weapons back to your car. By the time we get there, and zombies start attacking, we'll be better prepared."
"We could leave a scent of blood." Zach suggested, readying a knife.
Dave nodded.
"Once we get them all out there, we'll come back for the people in the storage room on the other end of the store." He said. "No scratch on Zach other than his own knife, and no scratch on my baby. Okay, let's go."
After Zach wiped his blood on everything here and there, we made our way out. I carried the lightest things (even in my dreams I was a wimp), and followed the boys, squeezing my way out the top window.
The way things were going it seemed like this was, after all, turning out to be a not-so-bad dream and in fact, it was a pretty awesome one. I mean, fine, maybe I started by coming off as some bimbo who was only about as useful as a monkey (probably even less so), but now I was coming up with ideas, and ways to avoid some serious emotional turmoil for viewers across the country. Okay, obviously not, considering this was only a dream. But everything just seemed so real, and when we got to the '67 Impala, I couldn't help but squeal. The fan girl inside of me was too excited.
Zach and Dave loaded the trunk with the weapons they carried, as I laid out the array of knives on the ground trying to desperately remember the one from the episode.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Dave voice came from the other end of the car. "Those knives ain't cheap, I hope you know."
"Don't worry," I said reaching down for the two that I remembered. "You use the more slender ones whenever anything gets too close and you aren't prepared with a gun, but since you're going to have to jab their brains in, I think these ones would get the job done better." I handed them each a knife and rolled up the suede carrier, dumping it next to the other weapons thrown in the truck.
"Okay, so you know what you're talking about." Dave said while we waited for the zombies to attack. "I'll give you that, but there is no way you're convincing me of all of that other crazy stuff. I mean c'mon. You're going to sit here telling me that this is a dream slash TV show? No offense, but you sound like a crazy person."
"I wouldn't believe me if I were in your shoes either." I explained. "But it's the truth. I'm just dreaming of my favorite book, and TV show of all time."
"Wait, you never said anything about a book-"
"Guys! Shh!" Zach cried. He moved behind the car, and crouched down as Dave and I followed after.
We waited for a few minutes, and after nothing happened, Dave got frustrated, and got up from his concealing position.
"Dave!" Zach cried.
"I don't know about you Zachie, but I ain't spending my night in a parking lot, and I'm sure the people in the storage closet of Shop 'n' Save don't want to be spending their night in a cramped up closet." Dave began striding towards the door with Zach keeping a steady pace behind him. "So, if these zombies aren't coming to me," Dave told us, "I'm going to them."
With the trunk open, I found the lightest looking gun and picked it up, surprised by its overbearing weight. These guns were nothing like the ones on Mr. Williamson's farm. I could at least carry those with out almost falling over.
Luckily, neither brother noticed me using their weapon, and since I wanted to keep it that way, I remained behind.
"Come on!" Dave cried banging his gun on the glass doors. "Come on, you cannibalistic sons of bitches! We're out here!"
It wasn't long until more than a couple began showing up. I remembered that the zombies from the show were meant to look like normal people without the rotting flesh and everything; they just didn't… function like them. Thankfully, Zach and Dave were able to shoot them out easily, like it was some carnival game they'd been playing since they were kids, but when groups at a time started to appear, they slowly backed up. It wasn't easy trying to conceal a weapon I didn't know how to use.
"Where'd you get that?" Dave hollered, while still trying to keep up with the attacking zombies.
"The gun store. Where do you think?" I replied.
"I don't remember saying you could use those."
"I don't remember you saying that I couldn't"
"Hey, I have a gun in my hand that I actually know how to use," He said. "Maybe I can make you remember."
"Jerk!"
"Bi- Ah whatever."
"I just think Dave means it's probably not safe for you to use that. It doesn't really look like you know what you're doing." Zach explained moving beside me to fight off whatever got too close, because I obviously couldn't.
"No, I meant exactly what I said." Dave chided. I only glared in his direction. There wasn't much else I could do.
Zach's stature continued to safeguard me from the cannibals that were headed our way. He and I backed away from the store and closer to the car, while Dave, very recklessly, began moving closer to the herd, shooting them off one by one, suddenly stopping when a girl that used to be a cashier moved towards him.
I moved away from Zach and closer up to where Dave was, as one of my favorite lines from the episode was approaching. While a group of zombies circled Dave, he shot them, and quickly loaded the gun, leaving the blonde cashier as was, while she closed in on him. He backed away slowly, but would not shoot the girl. Here, it was. It was about to come up.
Cue Zach.
"Dave!" He cried.
Dave clicked his gun and pointed it at the girl.
"Man. And you were such a babe." He moped, pulling the trigger with a wince. With that, he ran back to the car, grabbed a second gun, and like something out of Scarface, began shooting away.
The almost choreographed coordination between the brothers was one of the best parts of the show. The way Zach knew exactly when to hand his brother more ammunition without losing focus on whatever was attacking him, and how Dave got anything before it could get Zach. The way they worked was perfection. I mean they were able to get everyone of those flesh-eating sickos before, the flesh-eating sickos could even come after me.
Then it sort of struck me. Why weren't those zombies coming after me? Don't get me wrong—I appreciated not having been touched by those guys. It just seemed strange that they didn't even come close to me. The only time they really were headed my direction was when Zach was trying to guard me. Maybe in this dream I was immune to all things evil! Maybe they couldn't get to me because I was magical or something!
"Hey, Cru Ella!" Dave yelled, "Are you going to use that thing, or just carry it around like a pretty handbag?"
At first I was confused but saw that he was referring to the gun in my hand.
"Oh right." I said raising it.
With one shot I almost hit myself in the face with the thing and fell backwards. Thankfully, the dream gods were on my side, and I was able to keep my balance.
"Did I get one?" I asked looking at both brothers for an answer.
"The last one actually." Dave said.
"Not half bad." Zach complimented. "What do you think?"
I leaned over and examined the shot I made in the guys head.
"Well, Zach Savage just said my aim was 'not half bad', and I'm guessing that's the closest thing to a compliment I'm getting from either of you for a while."
"Probably," Dave muttered.
"I'd say I'm doing pretty awesome." I said with a grin.
"Let's go." Dave said throwing his stuff in the car, and getting in the drivers seat. Zach slid into the passenger seat, and without throwing up from excitement, I climbed in the back and Dave started the car.
"Ooh." I shuddered. "That sounds so much more…gorgeous in person."
Dave only turned around giving me a look that told me he thought I was more of a weirdo than any threat to him or his brother. Then, just as he was about to turn back, something caught his eye, and his expression changed.
"Uh oh." He muttered, causing Zach and me to turn around only to find there was still one more zombie we forgot about. "Hang on." Dave warned shifting into gear.
I looked around to find no seatbelt or handle for support.
"On to what?" I wondered.
"Anything." Dave stomped on the pedal, sending us backwards over the zombie, and me sliding all over the seats of the Impala.
Dave switched to "drive" and we drove towards the entrance. That zombie was relentless. It found its way in front of us.
"What is this a hybrid of a zombie and a cockroach?" Dave growled.
He reversed again, and this time I held on to the seats for dear life, as he maneuvered the car backwards around the lot, giving the zombie something to chase after. He glanced down at me and made a face.
"You know for a girl who doesn't like to walk around in skimpy bed clothes, you sure keep your legs awfully far apart from each other."
I looked down and gasped, quickly squeezing my legs together. How embarrassing. Dave only laughed to himself. What was he doing looking down there anyway?
Once the zombie seemed like he was having a bit of a rough time catching up, Dave shifted gears again and pulled up at the front of the Shop 'n' Save. He ran to the trunk and pulled out the gun he was using before.
"Just to be safe." He reassured us. We followed him inside to the storage closet, letting a group of twenty to thirty people out. "Go on, get out of here." Dave ordered.
"You guys should be safe now." Zach assured them as they ran out of the store.
"Well now that we've got that out of the way," Dave said pointing his gun at me.
"Dave…" Zach sighed.
"Are you serious?" I cried. "I'm pretty sure I just saved your asses, and now you're pointing a gun at me? How many times has that been within the past hour? Like six?"
"Dave," Zach tried again.
"Nope." Dave replied. "We didn't have time then, but now that all those damn zombies are dead, we have time."
Well, there went my previous assessment of Dave not seeing me as a threat.
"Look, the more I try explaining it all to you, the more you want to kill me!" I argued.
"Damn right I want to kill you! I don't even know if you're human!" Dave barked, taking me aback just a little. "How do you know me and my brother? What else do you know about us?"
"A lot." I told him, not really helping my case.
"Like what?"
"Okay, you guys are hunters, and both your parents are dead, and Zach was about to go to medical school before you came to tell him that your dad wanted the two of you on a hunt."
Dave's gun clicked and he raised it higher.
"Both our parents aren't dead. Just our mom." Dave snarled. "Unless there's something you want to tell us."
Immediately my face dropped.
"Oh shit." I gasped. "Is this season one?" I whispered to myself. Then I remembered that it was. Their father hadn't died yet. Maybe I could save myself. "Yea, that's what I meant. Just your mom." I couldn't even convince myself.
"You're lying!" Dave screamed making me jump.
"Look, I'm sorry." I said frantically. "I just thought your dad already died."
"Already?" Zach asked. "What does that mean?"
"It means she knows he's going to die and she's planning to kill him! I knew she wasn't human!" Dave yelled.
"No, no!" I cried. "You've got it all misunderstood!"
"Is that so?"
"Yes! Please, believe me!" I completely took back everything I thought about the dream gods being on my side. There was no evidence left to reassure me of that.
Dave lowered his gun and squinted his eyes, as if examining my face would tell him if I was being honest.
"You said this is a dream right?" He asked. I nodded in response. "And you'll wake up if you die?"
"Dave." Zach said, a little hint of shock in his voice.
"Oh come on." I pleaded. "You cant honestly-"
"Let's test that theory," and without flinching he lifted the gun and pulled the trigger.