Chapter 43
Sandor gradually awakened. He tried not to move, he was hurting so badly. He didn't instantly remember what had happened, he was just aware of his head lying on a soft little lap and small hands rubbing his face and hair. He listened for a moment and heard a sweet voice singing to him, he knew it was Elezbeth. He opened his eyes and saw his little girl watching him, her little fingers smoothing his hair back. She leaned down and kissed him on the head and said," I've been taking care of you, Papa. You've been asleep a long time. Do you want some water?"
Sandor gave her his best smile and nodded. He tried to move around on the bed when she went to get his cup but he found he could barely move. As he lay there, he groaned as the reason for his pain came back to him. Shalene. He thought, "Seven Hells, she beat me like she was a man! She could have killed me." He hurt in so many places, his back being the worst. Elezbeth came back to him and he let her hold the cup as he drank from it, she spilled most of it but her attempts at helping him took some of the pain from his heart. He sent her to find Tyrion.
A short time later, it seemed his entire household was in his room. Bronn and Mathew helped him move around in the bed as Sansa fluffed pillows around him and made sure he was propped up comfortably. Lucian stood by the door with Jonete' by his side, neither obviously happy. Elezbeth climbed back in the bed and sat beside him, taking his huge hand in her tiny ones, placing them in her lap. Edgar just watched him. Shae had the twins and after Sandor had touched them, kissing their heads, she sent them back with the nurses as he was too injured to hold them yet.
Sansa gave him a reproachful look and when she spoke to him, he knew he was being scolded but he had the decency to take it, knowing he deserved it. "This is the third time I have had to stitch you up. I can't believe you didn't die. You are not only built like an aurochs, you have a brain like one too. You have watched her fight and throw those knives. Did you think that just because she was a woman that she couldn't hurt you? You call me stupid! You have got to be the most ignorant man I have ever known! You want to get yourself killed, because you're jealous of another man! Well, I'm happy you're awake, Sandor, I can't even pretend that I understand what is going on between you two. I'm angry at both of you! You because you almost got yourself killed, and Shalene for doing it. Sandor, you two are so hard headed. She left with Ser Jaime. No one will tell me where she went. I care about you, it hurts me to see you like this. Don't do anything foolish, we all need you. I can't even begin to wonder why Shalene does the things she does, I feel she doesn't even know. Please just get well, we will all figure this out together." She brushed his hair from his face and kissed his forehead, then left him to his thoughts.
As Sandor listened to Sansa, he could feel that old darkness start closing in on him again. The pain in his body was nothing compared to what was in his heart. Why was he like this? He didn't learn a thing from his first mistakes it seemed. Every word that Sansa said to him was true. Shalene was the only woman who had ever wanted him, just for himself. She didn't ask anything of him except for him not to try to control her yet at every turn, he did just that. He was such a fool. Now not only had he done exactly what she asked him not to do, his behavior had caused her to leave him, taking the Kingslayer with her. FUCK! Was he ever going to be able to control himself! But what had he done to cause her to turn so quickly to the Kingslayer? He hurt too much to think about it right now.
Tyrion sent everyone from the room and handed Sandor a flagon of wine. His first thought was to just get drunk so he didn't have to deal with this. It was as if Tyrion could read his mind, he said," Look, Clegane. You are not the same man you used to be. You have people who depend on you now. You can't hide behind the wine and think it will all go away or that it doesn't matter. You have holdings to manage, people that look to you for their well being, a son on the verge of his marriage and children who need you. Not to mention that the future of the realm depends on you doing your part. We will be leaving soon, you have a very important part in what is going to happen, whether you believe it or not. You have got to heal, pull yourself together and stop acting as if my brother poses a threat to you. Gods, Clegane! She has always been difficult, you two are so much alike, I pray that you both can figure this out and make it through this. She isn't for Jaime. For all his arrogance, he truly is too much in need of a woman who can be patient with him and allow him to be his foolish romantic self. Shalene is loves you, she has ghosts, as we all do, Clegane. She is a foolish, willful girl. You are honestly, the only man who has ever tried to temper that, not that she doesn't need it, you'll just have to figure out a way to do it, if you still want her. Gods know I've tried, but I'm not her lover I've always been a brother to her ." Tyrion just shook his head. "You know you're lucky she loves you, the first throw could have killed you if she didn't. Wouldn't that be one for songs! How the great and deadly Hound was brought down by a tiny little Desert Flower!" Tyrion took his leave, laughing the entire time. Sandor downed the flagon, pissed at himself, he felt sleepiness take him and thought, dream wine, that Bloody Bastard!