Chapter 44

The days moved on , Jaime had never felt such freedom and peace. For once, he was able to be himself and not have to be "a Lannister or the Kingslayer," he didn't have to look over his shoulder at all times and he was finding a new and different strength and confidence in himself. He was silently in awe of Shalene, her totally opposing personality traits as well as her intelligence and skills.

He watched her as she mingled with everyone at Jade Mist and the surrounding lands. He had been openly complimentary of the palace, surprised that she had two in her possession. When she told him that she had given Emerald Bay to Sandor and that when Lucian became of age, she would be giving him Jade Mist, he was shocked. It seemed that every day spent with her just brought more questions than answers. Some she gave him, some she didn't. He didn't push it, partly because he knew what it was like to want to keep some part of yourself hidden from others, no matter the cost, and because he wasn't sure he wanted to know. He had begun to realize that he cared very much for Shalene, but he didn't feel it was love. It was as if they both needed time to explore, to loose themselves in someone else, and they did this with a frequency and abandon that still surprised him at times.

Jade Mist was smaller than Emerald Bay but no less impressive. Where the latter was primarily for breeding of horses, orchards, fishing fleets, wineries, and the like, Jade Mist had a smaller port, it also had a vast variety of craftsmen; stone masons, textile mills, wood carvers, armorers, metal workers, acre upon acre of rich, lush farmlands, and expansive herds of beef, sheep, and goats as well as chicken, pheasant, turkey, and quail farms.

Jaime was intrigued by the way that clams, oysters and various other crustaceans were farmed from various sites built around the bay. He was openly surprised when they rode to the mountains one morning and she introduced him to the steward over Bay Mist, the emerald mines, held by both Emerald Bay as well as Jade Mist.

He had noted how well cared for everyone was. No poverty of squallor. Everyone had good homes and
clothing. The children were educated and happily enjoying life. He also noted that in all areas, there was not only work being done, but education to teach the trade and pass on knowledge. It gave him many ideas, should he ever be anything except an exile or executed.

Shalene and Jaime rode along the shoreline, he watched as the sunset and thought about his life and how he had come to this point. He thought of Cercei, had he really ever been in love with her? He loved her as a brother now, he couldn't seem to remember why he had ever fallen into the trap his life had been. Always hiding, sneaking touches, rushed and violent sex, thinking that he had no life without her. He felt different now. More a man than he had felt in so many years. It was a liberating feeling to openly care about someone, to touch and hold her anytime he wanted. Not to hide in the shadows and wish for her touch. He watched Shalene ride and admired her grace and oneness with everything she did. He could understand why the
Hound had such a reaction towards her, but he was also aware of why she had to be free. He hoped that all of this would come to a good ending. Maybe he did love Shalene in a way, but he wasn't in love with her. He had figured out from their many conversations that she loved the Hound very much. He also had decided that even if she did forgive the old dog, he would not be her only lover.

They stopped at an area on the shoreline that was like a private cove. The sweet fragrance of flowers and the ocean mixed perfectly. He watched Shalene undress and race into the water, laughing like a little girl, he couldn't keep the smile from his face as he shed his own clothing and walked out to to ocean, the night was filled with laughter, the sound of splashing water, then soft words and stillness as the two walked back to the shore. Jaime felt more alive and at peace with life and himself than he had ever felt.

As they lay on the shore, consumed by their mutual need for one another, he felt his skin tingle with every touch of Shalene's hands. He watched, fascinated, as Shalene moved across him, mounting him like she was a Goddess of the Night. She lowered herself, taking him in completely, he felt pulled into the fantasy she seemed to be. As she moved on him, their movements matched, perfectly in tuned to one another. Shalene threw her head back, and he felt her hair cascade around them and as the breeze blew in off the ocean, he watched as it became an ebony halo surrounding them. He felt so insignificant yet complete in that moment, nothing mattered but them. His eyes drifted up to the millions of stars above them, it was as if he could touch them. He felt Shalene grasp his forearms and his eyes moved back to her. He knew he wouldn't hold back, at that moment they were one. He heard her yell something he didn't understand as they both spiraled into their own ecstasy, he opened his eyes and it was as if the Gods had planned this, the full moon rose behind Shalene, making her dark image seem to be cradled in it's paleness. The waves crashed on the rocks nearby, sending plumes of water into the air completing the image. Jaime lost himself in this site and his passion as he filled this Goddess with his essence.

Shalene seemed to be lost in a haze of desire and want. She couldn't place why she needed to lose herself in Jaime, only that she had too. The feel of his skin on her, his touch, the wind and water were all working to push her to a new place, she willingly let go and followed. As her fingers traced his body, she wanted to be one with him, he was so different, an ever changing force that knew no end. She adored him, she loved him in her own way, it felt as though they found in each other, what they were lacking in themselves. They moved together perfectly, taking their own pleasure, needing no words or guidance from the other. She felt his hand grip her hip, and felt him pull her as close to him as he could, with each thrust he made, she felt in her soul, exquisite blinding pleasure roll through her body. She yelled, "Ma Hoshor Hrakkar! Ma Hoshar Lajak! Ma Hoshor Vojjar! Athzhilar ma, ittelat ma!"

They slowly drifted back and relaxed into each others arms. Shalene nestled into Jaime's warm embrace and felt him chuckle. She looked at him and said," Did I do something funny, Lannister?"

Jaime laughed again, his perfected smirk playing across his lips, and said," No, I was just hoping you weren't telling me how you were going to kill me. I didn't understand a word you said."

Shalene thought for a minute, he could feel her smiling as her head rested back on his chest. She told him, "I called you My Golden Lion, My Golden Warrior, My Golden God." She ran her finger through the hair on his stomach and said," I asked you to love me, to show me that you care, in Dothraki."

Jaime replied," I hope I didn't fail you. It sounded rather barbaric, but in a good way. I like it. Hoshor Hrakkar, Golden Lion. I have been called that for many years, but not in that way. Hoshar Lajak, Golden Warrior, I've been called that. But you're the first one who has ever called me a Golden God. I think I'll remember the other two. Tell me again how to say love me."

As he kisses her he whispers in her ear, "Never mind, I remember, athzhilar ma." They lose lose themselves in each other again as the Heavens gaze down on them.