Tattooed

Summary: "I've lost everything to drugs, do you know that?" Sakura told him with tears in her eyes. "The funny thing is I've never even touched a drug in my life and yet it destroyed me. It took everything." She turned to face him then. "Please, don't let it take you away from me. I won't be able to handle it, not this time, not again." S x S.

Author's Note: Fashion Fairy 26, teru21, petiteTRINH, xXBlossomofShadowsXx, amelancholicangel, deadflo : Turns out this chapter is a lot longer than I intended. Had to be though. You'll understand why.

See you in a few hours in the next update!

Disclaimer: I have no rights over these characters. :)

xv.

The truth is hiding in your eyes

And it's hanging on your tongue

Just boiling in my blood

But you think that I can't see

- Decode/ Paramore

Sakura sat next to Mei Ling and Tomoyo on one side, while Touya and Yukito sat next to Syaoran, opposite the girls. The night air was chilly as their waiter served them water and bread. The view of the city twinkled bright blues and reds. Sakura looked at it for many minutes.

"So, what do you do Syaoran?" Yukito asked as he drank some water.

"I'm studying art at the GSA." Syaoran replied.

"Oh, isn't that terrific Toya?"

Touya looked impassive as he stared down Syaoran and Syaoran stared right back. Sakura swallowed in fear. This was not good.

"What do you two do?" Syaoran asked with a bitter tone, his eyes only on Touya's. Anyone would have thought they'd been enemies since birth.

"Toya and I are the founders of the APAA."

"APAA?" Mei Ling questioned.

"Association of People Against Addiction," Touya answered this time, his tone hard.

Syaoran only turned away, his expression sour as he met Sakura's eyes. The others were talking... but it was really just a buzz in the background now.

She offered him a weak smile. Why did this feel like a betrayal on her part?

Dinner went pretty quietly after that, with some talk only from Tomoyo and Mei Ling, and that too was amongst them. Sakura sighed in relief when the waiter came with their food.

Yukito spoke to Syaoran some. Sakura and Mei Ling discussed her new teaching strategy with the kids. Tomoyo joined in.

Touya eyed Sakura and then Syaoran.

Sakura was in trouble, she just knew it.

It was safe to say that dinner was a complete bust.

*.*

Even though dinner had been a complete disaster, it wasn't until the six of them reached home that the whole night went haywire.

"I think I'll take off," Syaoran announced.

"I still have to return your coat, come with me." Sakura said. He nodded and followed her to her room, as she wanted him to.

"I'm so sorry about my brother," her whispers were rushed. "I had no idea he would—"

"Don't worry about it," Syaoran said as he eyed the small Labrador at the foot of the bed. When did Sakura get a dog?

"Seriously, I'm—"

"Really, Sakura, don't worry about it." He told her as he folded his coat on his forearm. "Somehow, he helped clear up a lot of things,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked defensively.

"I'd always wondered how you knew... so much," his eyes looked angry. "I'm only upset that you didn't tell me."

"Tell you what? That my brother and his partner founded an organization for addicts? You never told me any details about your family." Sakura told him angrily.

"That's different. My family and I are not close, but you and your brother are!"

"From what I've heard you only paint those important to you on your walls, so if your family and you are not close then why are they on it?"

"How do you—"

"You want to pick a fight with me on secrets then so can I," Sakura battled. She now stood inches from his lips.

"Sakura?" Yukito's calm voice flooded through the room, making Sakura and Syaoran turn around to face him. Touya stood behind him. Sakura forced herself to take a breath to calm down. Syaoran huffed and made to walk out of the room.

"I'll see you," was all Syaoran offered before he left the room and then slammed the front door. Sakura sat on the bed defeated. Touya sat next to her.

"Sakura..."

"Don't even—" she lifted her hands in anger. Kero came to her.

"I'm... I don't know if..." Touya tried.

"Yukito, can you leave us alone?" Sakura asked. Yukito smiled.

"I'll go make tea for Tomoyo."

"Mei Ling left?" Sakura asked disbelievingly. Yukito nodded sadly, picked up Kero and shut the door.

For some time, Touya and Sakura said nothing to each other. Touya was giving her time to calm down, Sakura knew that but somehow it just angered her more.

"You had no right to treat him that way!" she was the first to start.

"No right? Sakura, he's a—"

"I know what he is." Sakura told him.

"And you still let yourself fall in love with him?"

Sakura gave him a cold, hard stare then. "I'm not in love with him,"

"You're defending him like you're his best friend, you're defying your own brother, and do I need to say more?"

Sakura looked away guiltily. Finally it all came down to this, how defensively she tried to protect the boy's name and image. It didn't matter though; Touya had been able to sniff out a drug addict like a needle in a haystack. It's how she'd learnt to do it as well. How'd she think she could hide this from him?

"How bad is he?" Touya asked then. "You know I can—"

"I don't think he wants your help, not after the way you treated him." Sakura told him.

"Look, I was thrown off by him so I was a bit hostile. That doesn't mean I don't want to help him." He reconciled. Sakura sighed.

"You'd have to speak to him to be hostile. All you did was sneer and growl the whole evening."

"I'm sorry Sakura; I just don't want you hurt."

Sakura looked at him then, her eyes watering.

"I know, I'm sorry too,"

Sorry. Such a meaningless word sorry was. It couldn't make things better, it couldn't undo anything. It didn't even have the power to fix. Sorry was the worst word in the world. It was useless, good for nothing and it made things worse, if not anything else.

She'd heard so much of 'sorry' that she was sick of it. How easily people said sorry, like it could make a difference. How easily she said sorry. As if it mattered. As if it could change anything.

"What do I do?" she asked, sounding helpless.

"Whatever you want to, Sakura, you know that."

"I don't want to—"

"I know."

Touya brought her close and held her to his chest. Brother and sister took comfort from each other, on issues past and issues that still persisted. While most days their demons were encountered individually and alone, today was one those lucky days that Sakura had Touya with her, by her side.

In the last minute, it was always her brother that came to help. It was always that way. That's probably what made the man her rock.

"You love him."

"Maybe," she allowed herself to say.

"Addiction came make monsters out of the best people, Sakura. You know that. He may be a great guy, and I know you have strong feelings for him, but that doesn't change the reality. You need to tell him, make him get help," Touya insisted.

"What if he doesn't listen to me?"

"Then you know what to do."

Sakura closed her eyes and let the tears slide across her cheeks.

"I can't force him to change," she said solemnly.

"Nobody can, Sakura." Touya told her with a look that said it all. Asking for help... how hard was it to simply ask for help? It was no longer the question of love, of trust, of reality... the only thing that counted was realization.

Nobody can, Sweetheart.

Sakura sobbed soundlessly in her brother's arms for hours that night. Even with her brother there, she'd felt lonely, far more than she'd ever felt.

Nobody can.

There is something I see in you

It might kill me, I want it to be true

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