Music tip:
Madonna - Frozen
youtube: watch?v=MDM0yAJjlBo

Run

Chapter 2:
Frozen

His hands must have stopped shaking hours ago, they now were ice-cold and covered in rain. It was easier to slip the key into the keyhole of the door and mere seconds later Mitch dragged his body into the hallway of his house. He was beyond exhausted and forced himself to stay upright, because once down he feared he wouldn't be able to get up again.

His workout in the middle of the night had turned into a mental breakdown and then a marathon – one he shouldn't have done. With trembling legs and arms he forced himself up the dark staircase, step by step he came closer to finally passing out in his bed. A few blissful hours of not remembering would follow, until he would awake in his bed with the memories of the night. And alone.

Of course alone. As always. Without Jerome. Never with Jerome…

"Where have you been?"
Mitch had just reached the top of the staircase, as a familiar voice to his left made him stop.
He froze. It was him.

Mitch slowly turned towards his best friend, but he couldn't make him out in the darkness of the upper floor.
Why was he awake? Had he been to the bathroom and then heard the door? Had he noticed Mitch leaving in the middle of the night? But why hadn't he followed then? Didn't he care at all? Had he been afraid to confront Mitch, because he knew that something between them was dead?

"I was worried sick, when you didn't return after passing the house an hour ago."

So it had barely been two hours since he had left the house in a hurry?
It actually felt like a lifetime.

He tried to answer, but not a single word escaped his hurting throat. Whether it was from the rain, the sobs or the screaming he didn't know. Not that it mattered anyway. Mitch closed his mouth again and stayed silent, while he began to feel sick to his stomach. It was a mere dream, wasn't it? Had he passed out at the side of the road? He had to, because he wasn't ready to face him yet, not so soon after he had torn himself up over what to do with his stubborn feelings for the American in front of him.

"Stop ignoring me!"
He flinched and took a step back, but Jerome stood in front of him in the blink of an eye. The anger was barely visible in his eyes, before it disappeared and only left worry behind. Mitch forced himself to not run away again while Jerome scrutinized him, because it wouldn't work.
Not this time.

"Why have you been crying?"
He froze. Again.
Mitch had been prepared to answer every possible question, why his clothes were drenched, why he had bags under his eyes, why he had left in the middle of the night-
Not this one though. How had he noticed?!

"I haven't. It's raining outside," he replied and winced at hearing his own voice. It was raspy, too raspy to be just from the rain and it uncovered his earlier lie easily. Jerome sighed and Mitch turned around to flee into his room. "No, you're not running away again," the other muttered and grabbed his wrist forcefully.

"You're going to talk to me about what bothers you. It's what best friends do and we are fucking best friends, right?"

"…right."
The sarcastic tone of his voice surprised Jerome and Mitch was able to free his wrist from his tight grip. Jerome knew? He hadn't expected him to and for a moment Mitch was silent, before he forced himself to keep on talking. He couldn't let this chance slip and was too tired to think of the consequences. They were done anyway, no matter the outcome.

"So you actually noticed? I didn't expect you to still care."
His voice was unusually cold and Jerome's frame seemed to freeze, but it felt good to let go of the hidden anger and the frustration that messed up his mind constantly. He was sick and tired of keeping the act up and pretending as if he was alright. Jerome hadn't noticed his conflicted feelings during the past weeks and months, so it was time to clear things up.

Once and for all.
Their friendship would come to an end, because Mitch was sure he couldn't survive doing this any longer to himself. One day Jerome would get married. Something he wasn't willing to witness. Something he couldn't witness. It would kill him. Or he would do it himself.
The other option was Mitch telling Jerome what he felt. He would break off the contact to him immediately – no more stupid and funny messages, no more banter-filled recordings, no more phone calls in the middle of the night because the other couldn't sleep. It would stop either way.

"Mitch, what-"

He didn't give Jerome the chance to continue.
"What I wonder about is when you actually noticed, though." A dry laugh, no trace of humor. "I mean, it's not like that you cared weeks ago, when I nearly broke down because you couldn't shut up about her. You just kept on ramming that fucking knife into my heart over and over again, while talking about how fucking perfect she was!"

Silence.
A lightning strike hit somewhere close and the sudden brightness filled the hallway in a split second through the small window behind Mitch. Jerome's expression on his white face was unreadable.

"So that's why you distanced yourself from me. I should've known," Jerome slowly said and crossed his arms in front of his chest. A gesture to protect himself. To protect her at all costs. The sickness in Mitch's stomach intensified, but the anger continued to build up inside of him. Jerome was twisting the facts and Mitch wouldn't let it end like this.

"I distanced myself?! Are you kidding me? Jerome, you were the one to ditch me for her, instead of meeting up with me, instead of recording with me, instead of just talking to me! I put up with it for months, because I knew how much she meant to you. Not in a million years could I have distanced myself from you, Jerome. I yearn for you to simply notice me once in a while, that's how desperate I am, so don't you dare telling me I am responsible for this mess!"

His voice was shaking as well as his hands, while he took a step back and leaned against the wall of the hallway. A little part of him screamed at Mitch to apologize and to undo the past minutes, but the rest of him simply wanted to run far away from Jerome and the mistakes they both had made.
Instead he continued to lean against the wall in silent darkness. Frozen. He felt still sick and had to take some deep breaths. The unexpected fight was wearing him down and he had been exhausted enough already from his little tour through the neighborhood.

"Wait a second – it's not that you don't like her. You're… Mitch, are you jealous of Louise?"

He just now realized?
Mitch looked up abruptly to stare into the surprised eyes of his so-called best friend, but the sudden movement only increased the sickness in his stomach. Now he knew. The secret was out. Jerome knew and in a second Mitch would have to deal with the hatred in his eyes, the last look he would ever see of him. It all became too much and before Jerome could react, Mitch ran towards the bathroom, due to the fear of being physically sick.

Had it been the stress of the past weeks? The worry to not let anyone see behind his mask? The realization that everything was over now?
They had known each other forever and were practically brothers, but now that the love he had for his best friend had grown into something supposedly even more fulfilling, everything was falling apart around him.

Suddenly the light was turned on and a figure sat down beside him, putting a comforting hand onto his back in the process. Jerome.
When Mitch was able to breathe again and the urge to throw up had disappeared without anything actually happening, the American began to say as if nothing had happened before, "Dammit Mitch, that's what you get for running around in the middle of the night while it rains. Let's get you out of your clothes."

He stood up and gave Mitch a towel, before he grabbed more and larger ones out of the bathroom cabinet. Why? Jerome knelt down again and carefully peeled off his hoodie. The emotions churned up again, he felt conflicted between anger and the ever-present need to be close to him. Just a little bit, he told himself. Enjoy the closeness as long as you can, before he disappears forever.

Why hadn't he escaped from him yet though?
He was unable to bring himself to ask Jerome, because he was afraid to scare him off for good.

"You're incredibly self-destructive if you want to be, you know that?"
How in the world was he able to still sound as if nothing had happened?

"Raise your arms."
Mitch obeyed the hidden command and stared at the ground, even though Jerome sat behind him now and couldn't see his flushed face. The urge to bring the adorable boy back to his senses was overwhelming, so he clenched his fists to refrain himself from saying something stupid. He should just continue to enjoy their last minutes together, until it all would be over.

But why hadn't he left already?!

With a sudden movement Jerome embraced him from behind while putting the towel around his wet shoulders. It lasted merely a second. Then he simply began to rub the towel with his hands, so that Mitch's frozen skin would heat up again.

"Stop it."
His trembling voice was barely above a whisper, but in the oppressive silence Jerome was able to hear him perfectly. He continued his soft gestures and ignored the words of the Canadian.
"Please, Jerome, stop it. Just leave and let us get it over with already."

"You're not telling me what to do, Benja."
The familiar nickname was too much and with a surprisingly strong shout he got rid of what bothered him the most at the moment.

"Why are you still here, Jerome?!"
His torturing movements finally stopped, but his hands continued to rest on his arms. Mitch pressed his lips together, afraid of what would follow. But it needed to happen, otherwise he would never be able to move on. At least he couldn't try to.

"What a stupid question…"
Jerome chuckled and Mitch gasped at the fine sound near his ear. Such bittersweet teasing.
"I'm your best friend. Where else should I be?"

Soft lips brushed over the thin skin of his left ear, then hesitated for a second, before they were pressed on a spot below it. His mind went completely blank in an instant. Nothing mattered anymore.
Jerome's lips continued to sweep over his skin, until he found the spot he must have been looking for. Mitch's pulse went through the roof and then completely stopped, as the lips began to gently suck on his pale skin.

"What are you doing?" he murmured and tried to keep the sane thought of what was right and wrong in his mind, but it was erased when Jerome bit and then gently licked over the bruised skin of his throat. With a gasp he closed his eyes and let his head fall back onto Jerome's shoulder.

"You have no idea what goes on in my mind. Don't expect me to be like everyone else, understood?"
Mitch was able to keep another gasp in by biting onto his lower lip, when two strong hands left his arms and instead grabbed his hips to pull his body towards Jerome's. The heat in his back revived him and his needs, and before he could think about it his parted lips begged, "Don't stop, Jerome, please don't."

The grab on his hips tightened, suddenly the lips were back on his throat, but this time Jerome placed a gentle kiss onto his carotid artery and then licked over the pulsating skin painfully slowly. He wasn't able to hold back a low moan and he could feel the other grin, before Jerome began to suck on his skin again.

He must have hit his head pretty hard on the run. It wasn't real, Jerome would never drive him crazy by doing… this. But then again his lips felt so real, as well as the pain and the pleasurable sensation of his bites and kisses.
And then they suddenly stopped.

"You don't know anything about my feelings. I've learned to hide them years ago, Mitchell."

Another bite.
Another kiss.

His hands were trembling as he grabbed Jerome's shirt clumsily with one hand. Then he began to process his words. "What are you-" He didn't get the chance to finish his sentence, as Jerome painfully pressed his fingers into his hips and then continued.

"You didn't have to lie to yourself for years. You didn't have to force yourself to move on while keeping our friendship alive. You didn't give your heart away, even though it belonged to someone else entirely. You simply chose one way, but it's not that easy."

His heart stopped beating.
It wasn't true.
Jerome… did he really?

"For years I looked at you the way you look at me, Mitchell. So don't you dare try to run away from me, now that you've presented me what I was yearning for all that time."

He whimpered.
No matter if it was real or not, he never wanted to wake up again.

What was a lifetime filled with heartache and unfulfilled desire compared to an endless moment of happiness and love? And then, when he realized what his words really meant, his heart began to beat again with a strong pace, while he filled his lungs with a deep refreshing breath.

Jerome felt the same.
What a heretic thought, so absurd, unreasonable even, but his heart wasn't willing to listen to his mind any longer after all the pain it had to endure.

Another lightning strike hit the ground, followed by the deafening thunder. Slowly Mitch forced himself to open his eyes again and to raise his head. Then he threw a shy look over his left shoulder.
Now or never.

Sitting on the ground he turned so that he was facing Jerome, whose hands were still gripping his hips. Mitch placed his hands onto his shoulders and then looked up into the other's eyes. They were pitch-black from the desire he wasn't willing to hide any longer and Mitch was drawn to his glistening lips. Their noses touched and he was a breath away from placing his lips onto Jerome's, as his consciousness appeared at the worst possible moment.

He stopped.
"I can't."

Mitch was about to pull away again, but a hand grabbed his neck and held him in place forcefully, centimeters apart from Jerome's lips. "Why?"
His voice was cold and on edge. A shiver ran down his spine.

"You're with Louise. I'm neither going to be some kind of affair, nor a stupid and meaningless one-night stand. I don't want to be second best, Jerome."
His counterpart stayed silent for a moment. Then he began to laugh huskily.

"Oh Mitch…"
An honest smile appeared on his lips and for a moment the dark expression faded into the background.
"You never were, nor will you ever be second best to me."

The grip on his neck tightened and he was pulled forward, until Mitch could feel Jerome's breath on his lips. His eyes sparkled mischievously and took his breath away.
"You are the jackpot."

Then Jerome leaned forward, stole a kiss from him and relinquished his grip on Mitch to place his arms around his back. He was falling, falling away from reality while he died a thousand deaths and was revived by those sweet, sweet lips over and over again.
I'm dead, I have to be, I'm dead, dead, dead, dead, dead-

Nothing was left from his earlier roughness, instead Jerome placed him carefully onto the forgotten towel on the ground to keep his bare skin separated from the cold tiles. His lips were still connected to Mitch's in an innocent kiss, but then he broke it when Mitch gently shoved him away.

"I love you, Jerome."
His mind was screaming at him to stop then and there, the mess that was awaiting him on the following morning was too much to deal with, but he wasn't able to hold back any longer. It was all or nothing, a life with or without Jerome and since he actually had a chance with him, something he had never dreamed of…

"I love Louise."
He froze. Had Jerome just been playing with him?! Had it been a sick joke to break him once and for all, a-

"But I dream of you."
A kiss on the forehead.

"I cherish you."
A kiss on his cheekbone.

"I adore you."
A kiss on his chest, directly above his heart.

"I care for you."
A kiss on the dark rings under his eyes.

"I find you irresistible."
He hovered above his lips.

"I can't imagine a life without you, never could, and now that you've given me the chance to love you, to not just be a best friend to you, don't expect me to back down again. I'm too far gone, Mitch. This is what I dreamt of. Just accept it."

Their second kiss was even better than the first, as their lips slowly began to move in sync. It was careful and shy, both didn't know what to expect from the other at first, but with every movement, every caressing they learned to please the other in a bittersweet and unimaginable way. Mitch's heart began to race again happily and he had felt more alive in the past minutes than he had the whole past year.

He should just give in to Jerome, because he loved him, he loved Mitch, even though he had been together with precious Louise for so long.
But was it fair to just steal him away from her? His stupid mind tried to imagine a what-if scenario, in which their roles were reversed. Wonderful Jerome would have been by his side, telling him day in and day out how much he meant to him and then-
From one day to the other he would be gone. In the arms of a girl that always had simply been a friend to him. Someone he thought he could trust as well. There never would have been a sign, nothing, and he would start to blame himself, because it must've been him that had somehow pushed Jerome away from him…

"Stop, Jerome!"
He forcefully stopped the kiss and managed to push Jerome off him long enough to slip out of his grasp and to stand up on trembling legs. His wet pants were clinging to his skin, but he brushed the uncomfortable feeling aside and tried to catch his breath again. When Jerome stood up as well, disturbingly calm, the dark look in his eyes was back and made Mitch step back until he hit the wall. Not that it mattered anyway, because Jerome was in front of him in an instant and pressed his shoulders painfully against the wall.

"You want to run again, don't you?" he whispered in his ear and feeling the heat of Jerome's body, Mitch forced out a shuddering "Yes." It was no use denying it anyway.

"Life isn't easy, Mitch, you can't run away forever. Once in a while you have to take the chance, even if it means that you lose sometimes."
Compared to Jerome's deep voice the kiss on the spot under his ear was surprisingly soft, but it didn't hold him back from replying.

"From what I understand you ran away as well."

"And see where we ended up, caught in the middle of a fucking love triangle because you aren't willing to accept that not everyone can be happy when love is involved."

Jerome's one-sided words flared the anger up again and with a humorless laugh Mitch muttered, still pressed against his warm chest, "Idiot, as if I don't know that."

"Then choose, Mitchell."
Jerome let go of him and backed away, until he stood in the middle of the dark bathroom. The rain was hitting the small window behind him and just now did Mitch take notice of it, but Jerome's following words shoved the thought back into insignificance.

"If you stay, I'll never let go of you again. If you choose to run away, we're done. I can't force myself to pretend as if nothing is wrong, while being your best friend and her boyfriend at the same time."

All or nothing.
A life with or without Jerome.

And then he was able to finally make a decision.

Jerome's arms caught him in a tight embrace, as Mitch flung himself at him. Both were silent for an eternity, but they couldn't care less while they enjoyed the calming presence of each other. Hours had passed, since he had woken up from a horrible nightmare about a possible future outcome. Hours had passed, since he had thought that kissing Jerome was an unreachable dream.

"I don't want to run anymore," he muttered and buried his face in the crook of Jerome's neck, tired and exhausted not only physically, but emotionally as well. The low chuckle of his best friend and lover calmed him down, while he leaned his head against Mitch's.

"Then you simply have to stop."
And so he did, frozen in Jerome's arms, but for once the restlessness inside of him died down to make way for something much better.

Love.
What a wonderful feeling.

AN: Second and last chapter of this short story - let me know what you think about it and make sure to follow me on Twitter for more info about my stories and me! -at- Milumaus =)