Redeeming Endeavor: The notification for the last chapter did not go out to everyone. Make sure you read that. And even if you have, you might want a little refresher since it's been a while.
Chapter 25: The Law of Distal Attraction
Even though they were separated, Roxas found ways to fight the long distance. Unfortunately, that directly contradicted Naminé's plan to confirm her feelings. It was a bit hard looking at the bigger picture when someone was essentially shoving the photo in her face.
For the next few months, Naminé dealt with text messages, calls, video conferences, and even snail mail from Roxas. Distance, and perhaps the shame-shield provided by technology, only emboldened him to exercise his flirting prowess.
Naminé could have handled it better. She could have ignored everything, but in reality she enjoyed the attention. Not only that, but she enjoyed talking with Roxas. So with every text message, call, video conference, and mailed envelope that came, she answered.
She wasn't dealing with it. She was actually taking it in.
The only reason why she didn't want to make anything official was so that she could clear her head. It shouldn't have developed so quickly, and it was rather fickle of her to loathe him at the beginning of summer and like him- like him a lot- by the end of it. That carried some implications. If she was so quick to start liking him, wasn't it plausible that she'd grow bored of him quickly as well? She had to make sure she knew her feelings weren't just flares of excitement over a new friend.
Roxas was just making it terribly difficult, and it wasn't entirely his fault. If she could ignore him for longer than a few hours, he'd back off.
Of course, Kairi liked to remind them that they were practically dating and that most people would label them as a couple: an official pair of boyfriend and girlfriend. People who claimed to be "just friends" typically didn't tell each other about their romantic feelings, nor did they usually know that the feelings were mutual. Kairi teased Naminé about that when she got the chance, as if Naminé and Roxas were some contrarian, pseudo-hipster, or counter-cultural pair that didn't subscribe to the labels of society.
Though it might have seemed that way, it was the opposite of what Naminé really wanted. But nothing in real life actually adhered to the scenarios of she had imagined. Like most people, she had her ideal way of falling in love and set of events that would unfold like a completely possible love story. She'd find a boy, maybe in a library or a park but most likely in school or the town center where she occasionally volunteered. She'd do something and somehow catch his attention, and he'd approach her because he'd be a lot smoother and super confident and she'd sure as hell be too shy to approach him. They'd talk and immediately hit it off because he'd appreciate art and listen to the same music and hate the same trivial things. They'd become friends, best friends even, and after months of countless lunches together, stargazing, and conversations that never should have ended, he'd one day confess that he had liked her all along.
It was entirely possible, right? Idealistic, but possible. She didn't believe everything she read on the Internet, but she had come across many a story that involved meeting in the most unlikely places. Who actually met in an airplane and sat next to each other and talked the entire flight? That was the sort of thing that only happened in movies. Two people bumping into each other and falling in love? Yeah right. Normal people excuse themselves and continue on their way. And then there were those stories about how two people had grown up together and had been friends pretty much their entire lives, only to discover that the one they loved was right next to them all along.
Actually, that sounded a lot like Kairi's and Sora's story.
Naminé tamed her imagination, but reality decided to be more unpredictable. Instead, she liked a boy she knew- in the sense that she knew he existed, anyway- since childhood. That was rare enough. Then they spent a good decade loathing each other with no intention of clearing any possible misunderstandings. They talked out of necessity because they happened to be around each other, and neither was shy when it came to voicing their displeasure. She essentially went from finding his face punchable to one she'd stare at every so often. That was the crazier part. If he wasn't far enough from what she imagined already, he didn't think much of visual arts at all, and instead of listening to the same music, he'd told her to listen to his and open herself up to more genres than she cared to hear.
Yet she fell for him. And if she were given the chance to choose between her ideal boy and Roxas, she'd choose Roxas. And if she were given the chance to replace Roxas with her ideal characteristics, she'd choose to keep him the same. Even if nothing went according to plan, and even if they couldn't have a normal relationship at the moment, Naminé wasn't just going to ignore her feelings or his. Not after they had the guts to yell about it in an airport.
So when Naminé's laptop lit up, she scrambled off her bed and knocked her textbooks to the floor in the process. After deeming herself presentable in the mirror, she did nothing to restrict the smile on her face as she answered Roxas's call.
The school day finally ended, and Roxas was one of the few students left in the hallway. While Sora met with a tutor, Roxas passed time by looking at Naminé's photos on his phone. She didn't post anything recently, but Roxas acquainted himself with everything there. HE lingered on a picture that featured both of them staring back at the camera in Club Spades.
"Huh. That girl looks way out of your league."
Roxas found Sora's tutor, Joshua, looking at the picture. Joshua didn't look the part- his long blond hair, untucked shirt, and generally messy appearance painted him as a delinquent- but he was one of the top students in their year. Roxas was pretty sure Joshua ranked second, just slightly behind the one person Sora could've asked for help, but didn't because he liked to make a competition out of everything with said person.
Roxas tucked his phone away and stood up. "Yes she is," he replied.
"She single?" Joshua asked.
"I said she was out of my league. I didn't say she was available," Roxas said.
"You also didn't say whether or not she was single."
"I'm pretty sure you don't actually care. I always got the impression you played for a different team," Roxas retorted.
Joshua smiled. "Let's skip to the end of this conversation then. I just wanted to know if you two were dating. Think about that for a while." He tucked his hands into his pockets and walked off just as Sora arrived.
Roxas moved on and drove home with Sora. Ever since Kairi left, Roxas was always looking for changes in Sora's attitude. There were none: Sora went about his day as his happy-go-lucky self even without his girlfriend around. Roxas always wondered how that was possible, especially since he couldn't go more than two hours without talking to Naminé. He wouldn't call it an addiction— surely he could stop if he ever wanted to— but it was probably the closest description of his recent behavior.
As soon as he reached his room, Roxas turned on his computer and called her. He changed clothes as the call went through, but it connected before he finished.
"Oh no. No no no. We are not having that kind of call," Naminé said as her image refocused from pixelated tiles to a clear video.
"Don't act like you didn't enjoy it," Roxas said as he pushed his head through his shirt. "Anything exciting happen today?"
"Well, thanks to your text, my phone buzzed in the middle of a math quiz and prompted a lecture afterwards of how we're supposed to have them turned off," Naminé said.
"You could always do that," Roxas suggested.
"Or you could be a good student and not text while both of us are in class."
"Is this your way of telling me that I should change instead?"
"I only want what's best for you," Naminé said. "What about you? You ready to help me study?"
"I'm pretty sure someone tried to hit on me, but I could be reading into it. He basically asked if I was single," Roxas said nonchalantly.
"Wait a second. He?" Naminé asked.
Roxas ignored her. "Other than that, today was uneventful. So I'm ready to study when you are."
"I always thought you had a feminine face. No wonder boys find you attractive," Naminé said to herself.
"Wait, what?" This time, Roxas was ignored.
"Let's get started then."
Roxas had become accustomed to his new routine with Naminé, which basically entailed following her lead. He was okay with that. It made things easier for him. He'd make an advance, then she'd squirm a little and manipulate the conversation without turning him down. Did it make her uncomfortable?
Even if it did, he wasn't going to stop unless she demanded it. Given their history, Roxas secretly enjoyed teasing her. It wouldn't feel right if he treated her lovingly, at least not without making fun of her. Maybe that would eventually change, but for now it didn't feel right.
For the next few hours, Roxas watched Naminé recount her exam material and recite the Citric Acid cycle from memory. With her midterms coming up, he promised to help her study one of her weaker subjects.
His attention was more focused on her than the review document she sent him though. His eyes jumped from her face, lingered on her neck, and darted to her shoulders left uncovered by her halter top. Would her skin be as soft as it looked? Roxas imagined the feel under his fingers. When would he see her again? He needed to confirm it himself. As soon as he realized what he was thinking, Roxas shook his head and found Naminé staring directly into the camera.
"Are you even listening to me?" she asked, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Of course I am," he lied. There was no way she fell for that. "Continue from where you ended."
"Remind me where that was, please?"
He cleared his throat. "That one part in the middle."
"Which part?"
"Oh, you know… the one with ATP involved." He smirked. He knew he had been caught.
"You're supposed to be listening!"
"And I have been, until you started reciting it a fifth time when the other four times were correct," Roxas said, leaving out the part where his thoughts drifted to unrelated topics. "And I always listen to you. Don't act like I don't. I've listened so much that even I could recite the Krebs—"
"Citric Acid."
"Same thing— point is I have it memorized too, only because I listened so many times."
"Prove it then," Naminé said.
"Seriously?" Roxas raised a brow. When Naminé didn't react, he closed his eyes and parroted the entire cycle back to her. He silently congratulated himself for studying so intensely two weeks prior when he had his own exam.
Naminé pressed her lips into a thin line. "Fine. You know it, but can you just listen to me one more time? I need to be sure I have this down."
Roxas laughed. "Well be my guest. Besides, I love it when you talk dirty to me."
"And now I know where your mind has been the whole time," Naminé said, her blush apparent even on the computer screen.
"What? I find smart girls sexy. Could be worse, right?" Roxas shrugged. "I only date girls smarter than me too. That's just my personal standard."
"Oh really?"
"Yup."
"You only date girls who are smarter than you," Naminé repeated.
"That's what I said."
"Huh. That doesn't really tell me much, does it?" Naminé turned away from the computer screen. "I mean, that's quite a large dating pool."
Roxas's mouth dropped open. He laughed, dragging out a long "O" as he sat back in his chair. "I can't believe… you are… you are so mean! I kind of like it," he joked. A website link appeared in the chatbox below the video feed. "What's this?"
"A list of home remedies you can use to treat your recent burns," Naminé said. "You're welcome."
Roxas shook his head. How did she do that, and why did it have such an effect on him? It couldn't have been normal. Exchanges like that weren't supposed to make him wish she were with him just so he could smash his lips against hers and feel her body pressed against his. He probably should have been worried that he found Naminé's wit arousing. It was probably another thing he carried over from their past relationship. He was a glutton for punishment now.
"God you're so hot," Roxas said under his breath.
"What?" Naminé smiled at the camera, leaning closer for him to clarify.
Roxas snickered. It was better that she didn't hear him say that. It was probably sexual harassment. "Nothing, nothing!" He waved it off. "Let's continue. What else do you got?"
Months passed, and Naminé eventually scrapped her old plan to get some space. Not only did it suck, but she actually had tons of space in the form of physical distance. There was also an ocean— granted, not an entire ocean— between her and Roxas. So she embraced the attention. She expected the calls from Roxas, and expected him to be ready for her to call him whenever she wanted. Though they still lacked the label, Naminé considered herself taken.
She just never told Roxas that part. It still didn't make much sense to call Roxas her boyfriend when all they had done together was talk for a few hours every day on the computer. Some things were better shared in person anyway.
Kairi probably would have freaked if she knew, but she hadn't bothered them in a while. It definitely had to do with her walking in Naminé and Roxas's conversation of making asiten, which was really just a stronger version of asinine, an actual word that would spread enough to be added to the dictionary. It wasn't their most profound conversation. Kairi mentioned that she had lost all hope for them after listening to them for a few minutes.
Given that she talked to Roxas daily, Naminé noticed that Kairi handled the distance with Sora in a different manner. Naminé didn't know whether or not it was the same the previous year, but Kairi rarely talked to Sora on the phone. Dating him didn't mean talking to him a lot— or at least Kairi didn't make a big display about talking to him. Perhaps she was still trying to hide that fact from their mother.
Admittedly, Naminé eavesdropped a few times when she did hear Kairi talking on the phone with Sora. The conversations were pretty mundane. Worried that something might have been wrong, Naminé pulled a page from her sister's book and decided to find out for herself. It took her a few days to muster the courage to talk to Kairi about potential relationship problems, but Naminé wanted to let her sister know that she was there. Praying for the best, Naminé brought up the topic at the end of one of their conversations.
"Why do you think there's something wrong?" Kairi asked.
Naminé blushed. Why did Kairi have to look like the question was completely unwarranted? "I just thought there was trouble since you weren't talking to Sora," Naminé said.
"I talk to him though," Kairi said.
"Yeah, but not… you know. You guys are dating, so I thought you guys would want to talk more or something."
"Nam, Sora and I are fine. He's my best friend, and we can live without talking to each other every day," Kairi said.
"Well if you're so okay, then forget I said anything," Naminé said. Sure, she compared her habits with Roxas to Sora's and Kairi's, but if she was going to be teased about it, then she'd just leave Kairi alone.
"Oh don't take it that way! Get back here!" Kairi ordered Naminé to stay in the room. "Fine. If you really want to know, I don't think I could talk to Sora every day. I honestly have no idea how you and Roxas can do that."
Naminé sighed. She sat at the end of Kairi's bed. "You miss him a lot," she said.
"So much that I try not to think about him." Kairi hugged her knees to her chest and hid her face. "Stupid, I know. My solution to this long distance thing is more distance."
Naminé got what she wanted. Too bad she didn't plan anything to say in advance. "Um, is it helping?" she asked. "How's Sora taking it?"
"Sora's getting by the same way he has when I didn't know he liked me. It's just easier if we… ugh." Kairi raised her head. "I'm just going to tell you, and you're not going to tell anyone else. The biggest reason why we don't talk to each other often is because any conversation we have that lasts over half an hour turns into a discussion of how awful it is not being able to have sex."
"W-What?"
"Yeah, I know it's not guaranteed we'd ever find enough time alone, but at least we had the option." Kairi leaned against the headboard, her chin held high. "Judge all you want. I miss it too much to care."
"I'm not judging you," Naminé replied quickly. "I'm just surprised."
"I know you have something to say though, so just say it," Kairi said.
When did they get here? This was definitely not on the list of possible directions Naminé came up with in the few seconds since their talk began. If she knew it was going in this direction at all she would have avoided it. She never even suspected that Kairi had already gone that far, if only because she never saw Sora going through with it too. Naminé pushed her initial reactions aside, ignoring any judgments she already made. Left with nothing to say, Naminé blurted a jumbled mess of words to fill the gap in conversation.
"Was he big?"
The soft hum of the air conditioning came to a slow end, rendering the room still and silent. Naminé opened her mouth, closed it, and mentally cringed. She needed to leave. "That was not— I did not mean to ask that. I didn't want to ask that 'because I don't want to know, not really, not really at all."
Kairi giggled, her laugh a crescendo of stutters to squeaks and gasps for air. "That was the first thing to come to mind?" she asked.
Naminé burned with shame, the room growing hotter with each second. "No it wasn't! I just had a bunch of questions and just picked one! I have no idea why it was even there because I don't want to know!"
"Yeah, sure," Kairi said as she regained her composure. "I'd say that's the last thing I expected you to say, but that didn't even make the list."
"I think we should—"
Kairi interrupted her. "Nam, Sora has the biggest one I've ever seen."
Naminé blushed, her shame replaced with curiosity. "Really?" she asked, her eyes widening.
"I'm dead serious. And just so I know, how many penises do you think I've seen?"
"One?" Naminé ventured a guess. Her answer clicked a few moments later. "Oh. Oh. That makes a lot of sense." Naminé's shoulders drooped. Head bowed, she placed her feet on the floor and turned her back to Kairi.
She tried to run out of the room. She really did. But Kairi was faster, so Naminé was pulled back onto the bed and thrown onto her back.
"No! Let me die in the comfort of my own room!" she yelled in her struggle to break free.
"If you wanted privacy, then you shouldn't have asked for private information!" Kairi pressed a pillow into Naminé's face. "I'm telling Roxas what you asked me, you perv!"
"I'll kill you if you do!" Naminé said as she pushed Kairi off her. The two broke into a fit of laughter, resetting the conversation. "I'm sorry for asking that," Naminé said as she fanned herself with the pillow that was previously suffocating her. She told herself her reddened face resulted from the sudden increase in temperature.
"Don't worry about it," Kairi replied.
"I can't believe you actually saw it."
"Never really got a good enough look. Too distracted by other things."
"This can't be appropriate," Naminé said. She turned herself over, tucking the pillow underneath her arms. "Talking with your sister about your sex life? We shouldn't be so casual about it, right?"
"I don't know. But I want to talk about it and I don't have anyone else. Who am I going to go to? Mom? My track teammates? I don't trust any of them with that information, and I can't talk to Sora about it because it'll make everything worse."
"Is that healthy? And is Sora even okay with it?" Naminé asked.
"I think we're much better off if I don't tell him how badly I want to sleep with him. It's not like I'm unsatisfied with what we've done. And like I said, he'll be fine and get by like he always has," Kairi said dismissively.
Naminé had no idea what Kairi meant by that, but chose to ignore it. "It's your relationship."
"Don't you and Roxas talk about this stuff?" Kairi asked.
"What stuff?"
"Sex."
Naminé blushed. "Of course not!" What do you think we talk about anyway? Actually, don't answer that."
"Nothing exciting, apparently," Kairi muttered under her breath. "Didn't you guys confess to each other? You're talking every day because you're dating, right?"
"Wha— no! We're just trying to get to know each other still," Naminé said.
Kairi shrugged. "Sounds like dating to me. He doesn't need to be your boyfriend to date him. It's the other way around: you have a couple dates, then decide on whether or not to date exclusively."
Naminé bit her lip. "If you put it that way, then maybe we are." She quickly backtracked. "But we never talk about that stuff. There's no… uh, physical relationship. Not like there can be."
"The fact that you call it a physical relationship probably means you're not ready for one," Kairi pointed out.
"We don't think of each other like that," Naminé said. She kept a "not yet" to herself.
"You mean you don't think of him like that. He's a guy. He's gone all the way with you at least once with his imagination."
Naminé groaned. "Why would you say that?"
Cut the crap. If you're trying to be naïve, stop. It's not cute. It's just unattractive," Kairi deadpanned.
Naminé frowned. In her last conversation with Roxas, they both expressed a similar and strong opinion on willful ignorance. He'd call her out too if he saw her now. "Sorry. I just like thinking Roxas is better than that," she said.
"I'm tempted to ask what makes him better for not thinking like that, but we'll ignore that for now," Kairi said. "Just do him a favor and stop making assumptions. You're in for a world of hurt if you paint him up to be someone he's not."
Naminé rolled her eyes. Her sister was right. Rather than come up with a smarmy comment on Kairi's sage advice, Naminé changed the subject. "Have you ever noticed that our most notable conversations revolve around boys?" she asked.
"What else would it be? We could talk about school and rehash everything we know about each other. You could also listen to me complain about Mom. But isn't that boring? We're twins, Nam. I can practically read your mind. Why not talk about the one thing new to both of us?" Kairi asked.
"I'm not saying we shouldn't talk about it. For the record, I like having someone to talk to about this," Naminé said.
"Good. I'm only slightly less lost than you are when it comes to relationships." Kairi smiled. "All right. Go and tell Roxas everything we just talked about now. I'm going to call Sora and I don't want you listening."
Naminé wanted to deny it, but lying wouldn't benefit her at all. She got up and threw a pillow at Kairi. "I know you only knew that because you're doing the same exact thing," Naminé accused.
"See? There's that twin telepathy I was talking about."
Redeeming Endeavor: I'm going to shorten the chapters so I can update more often. This story should end by September, since I've got two or three chapters left and an epilogue around this length. I found that I've lost my touch with these characters (they're not even mine, and the disconnect is really messing with me), so if you feel like nothing really happened, it was more a way for me to reacquaint myself with them. I need to rattle off some chapters and turn the last page.
There are no notes available. I just struggled a lot, rewrote this a few times, and then chopped the original chapter in half and am posting it here now. School has started again, so I hope everyone who is back and is going back has a wonderful year. If you're done with school, then I hope you enjoy weekday outings and any other adult benefits that come with a new school year.
Hoh. Lee. Sheeeeeeit. This took way too long.
I'd like to thank TheShadowRiders, monkmonkeys, Mina Arellano, BrotherGrimSVSD, GengaJupite, It's My Lucky Charm, Kinetic Monkey, Justice Tokidoki, Xerzo LotCN, LemonCookie, FromSoraXWithLove, ShadowTwilightXIII, PumpedUpKyx, Bezerker21, Tenishi Yami- Angel of Darkness, Le Neko-neko, Sookdeo, Draconic, Alrysse, Vitality Astral, Pili1995, Versivalia, pyororo67, Kuroiikawa, Omega, Welllookatthat, Pur3picness, Pink Star Art, Dancing under the velvet moon, HopelessRomanticCookie, ChuckleBunny, xuxin, Awkward Dork, Jazzypicks143, EnterAbyss2991, Bguest, CascadeofRaindrops, CarelessWhispers13, Burai Stelar, Dramamamapwnsall, A-Scattered-Dream, Lilly, PantiesOnFire, Keytotongu, Prince Sky Heart, PinkParadise23, killingtex, Wolve'sApprentice, shoang, RoxasNami5ever, Twenty-Twenty-One, and Satyrykal for reviewing after reading. Gotta say, some of your reviews made me laugh. You guys are funnier than I am. As always, let me know if you guys find some errors that need to be corrected.
Harmless(?) Author Fact #25: Find me on Xbox Live! Gamertag is Darth Darda. We can play together (or if you're silver, the most we can do is chat) if we have any of the same games, or even chat!
Chapter Data- 4122 words, 828 minutes.
I kinda wanna update ATH. Perhaps I'll do that before updating this again. Take care, everyone. I'll see you around.