Chapter 3
The next day Spock reported to detention with the rest of the people who were present for the food fight. The gymnasium was not fitted with any chairs so students had seated themselves on the floor. Most were clumped together in groups with their friends, although Spock estimated that, as this was a punishment, they would not have much time to interact with one another. He angled himself toward a sparsely populated corner of the room, where he sat close to the wall. He heard a teacher's voice call out, informing them that the detention time was simply to be spent in silence, as there were too many people participating to have them do much else.
Spock seriously doubted whether they would have the ability to even remain quiet. From what he had garnered of Human nature, they were extremely restless and social creatures. However he was perfectly content to sit in silence. He even viewed this punishment as an opportunity to meditate. He straightened his back and closed his eyes, allowing himself to slip into a calm state. It took longer than usual. He supposed he was out of practice, having not found as much free time in the fast paced life that was lead on Earth. Soon he was relaxed and at peace in his meditation.
Unfortunately, it could not last. He was so encompassed in his meditation that he did not notice the change in the air currents as someone sat down beside him. He also did not notice when that person began chuckling softly under their breath. He did notice, however when they flicked the curve of Spock's upper ear with their fingers. He was pulled from his meditation and had to inhale deeply in order to quell the irritation rising within him. Slowly he opened his eyes and turned his head to see the person who had flicked him.
To absolutely no surprise, Spock thought to himself, it was Jim.
"Can you feel that?" he asked in a hushed voice as he flicked Spock's ear once more. Spock's eyes narrowed slightly and he had to remind himself that reacting emotionally was illogical in this situation. Jim's blue eyes stared back into Spock's and he saw that they held a mischievous humour that he had not encountered in any human before.
"Yes, I can," he said calmly and turned his head back to the front, breaking the hold of Jim's eyes. Unfortunately, though Spock had answered his absurd question, Jim continued to flick the tip of Spock's ear with his index finger.
"Are you sure?" he asked. "Haha, this is fun," he added, flicking Spock more vigorously.
Spock's arm flew up and his fingers wrapped around Jim's wrist. He brought both their arms down and released Kirk quickly, as if to minimize any feelings he might absorb from the human.
"Please refrain from doing that," He said in a firm voice, working to control the anger that was sparking inside him. He was somewhat perplexed by this. Though his mother was human, Spock didn't often encounter problems when controlling his emotions and thinking logically. Perhaps it was due to the increased amount time he had spent with humans recently, Spock thought, although most humans had been nothing but welcoming to him. Perhaps it was just Jim's constant and incessant irritation of Spock that was challenging his control. Whatever it was, Spock did not wish it to continue.
"Your blood's, like, green right?" Jim asked a smirk growing on his face. Spock nodded in silent assent, not willing to continue a conversation with this boy and encourage his antics. Spock saw that on Jim's other side, stood his friend Leonard McCoy, who Jim often referred to as 'Bones.' He looked as exasperated by Kirk as Spock felt.
"Goddammit man, would you leave him alone," he said gruffly, imploring Jim.
"I suggest you follow the advice of your friend. He seems to be an intelligent person," Spock murmured sternly. Jim laughed loudly at the comment, not worrying himself with the rules of the detention. Kirk appeared to be endlessly amused, Spock noticed.
"Yeah, Bones is a smart one. Grumpy as hell, though. Y'know you're a real downer sometimes," he added to his friend, seeming to be joking, as he always was. 'Bones' did not look amused. He glanced from his friend to Spock a couple of times with a peculiar look of frustration on his face. Then he shrugged.
"Whatever. I'm going to go sit with Hikaru and the rest. You two… have fun, I guess." The boy shook his head and ran his hand through his hair before moving over to a cluster of people who were not heeding the rule of silence by any stretch of the imagination. Jim turned back to Spock and grinned widely.
"I do not understand the reason that you are currently sitting with me and not your colleagues." Spock said, a questioning tone to his voice.
"Eh," shrugged Kirk, "you're new. And you're an alien. And you have green blood. That's pretty cool. Plus I haven't had any new toys to play with in a while." Spock frowned at the analogy. He was not sure if it was a human expression, although he harboured an inkling that it was not.
"So how d'you like Earth so far?" Kirk asked. Spock felt slightly suspicious of the newly civil direction that the conversation was taking.
"This school is adequately furthering my education and the grounds are aesthetically pleasing, to an extent."
"Wow, you really are Vulcan."
"Technically, I am only half Vulcan, my Mother is Human."
"Half Human, huh? So, why do you have as much of a stick up your ass as the rest of the Hobgoblins?"
"Hobgoblins?" Spock queried
"Yeah, that's what Bones calls you guys, and I suppose you can see the resemblance," he said, tilting his head slightly as if he were appraising Spock's similarities to small green creatures that had warts and stole the possessions of Humans.
"Seeing as Hobgoblins are mythical creatures known for mischief and trickery, I would say that the resemblance lies with you," Spock said, evenly. Jim laughed loudly, his head falling against Spock's chest as his shoulders heaved with laughter, Spock's body tensed in response to the unwelcome proximity. Jim tried to draw breath and failed, as shudders of laughter gripped his chest once more. After the laughter had abated, Spock placed his hands on Jim's shoulders and straightened him, angling Kirk's body away from his own and drawing back quickly.
"So, you've actually got a personality under all that Vulcan bullshit, then. Good to know. You were starting to become boring." Spock pursed his lips ever so slightly, affronted.
"All Vulcans have personalities, James, it is just that we use logic to control our emotions and decisions in a way that humans do not," Spock explained, his voice tinged with annoyance.
"James, huh? You know my name, Spock? Now, I never told you what my name was. How could you possibly know that?" Jim's face radiated pure glee.
"You know my name, information that I do not recall imparting to you." Spock countered.
"Yeah, well. I find out we've got a Vulcan coming in and you expect me not to look into it? I checked you out," Jim explained with a wink, "I knew your name before you even got here, Spock. Also, nice: trying to avoid the question. I heard that Vulcans couldn't lie, but you're sneaky little fuckers, aren't you?" Spock turned his head away from Jim's expectant face. It was obvious that he was not one to drop a subject.
"Seeing as your voice is louder than any I have encountered prior, it was impossible for me not to learn your name after hearing it from the mouths of every teacher we share on more than one occasion." Spock explained truthfully, although he had not needed to hear Jim's name more than once for it to be fixated in his mind.
Jim seemed to sense this to some degree because his look of self-satisfaction only increased. However, contrary to his expression, he said, "Well, Spock, I'm offended," not sounding offended in the slightest. "I am an upstanding student, dedicated to my studies. Just because I am a lowly Human does not mean that you can look down on my humble attempts at getting an education." Jim's voice mockingly innocent.
"You are offended? You are the one who has done nothing but insult me throughout this entire conversation. Furthermore, I do not recall ever saying that I kindled any condescension towards Humans."
"Careful now Spock. Dare I say I picked up on a little emotion there."
"I am unaware of what you are referring to," Spock said quietly, trying to keep his composure. He could not allow his face to portray any expression, as Jim would pounce upon the display like a hunter to prey.
"Sure, sure." Jim drawled, grinning. He looked up into Spock's eyes, "you can deny it all you want, Pointy, won't make it an less true."
Spock looked down from his slightly elevated height and met Jim's eyes, "Pointy? Was that a derogatory reference to my ears?"
"No, it was a derogatory reference to your green blood," Kirk said rolling his eyes, though he didn't seem exasperated at all.
"I am detecting large amounts of sarcasm within your comment," Spock stated, never understanding the need for such a concept himself.
"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock," Jim replied, dryly.
"I am not, nor have I ever had, any relation to the fictional character of Sherlock Holmes."
"It's an expression, Spock."
"I deduced that from the tone with which it was conveyed. However, I did not agree with the analogy," Spock replied.
At that time he noticed that Jim's friends were being abnormally quiet. Well, for them, at least. Spock looked over and saw that many of them were sneaking the two curious glances before turning back to the group conversation.
"I do believe they're talking about us, Spock," Kirk said, noticing Spock's gaze. The thought didn't seem to bother him.
"I had come to the same conclusion. Perhaps they wish for you to return."
"Yeah, probably, I am the sun around which their solar systems orbit: their reason for being: their sustenance of life." Kirk dramatised everything, Spock concluded.
"Indeed," Spock replied, wryly.
"Was that sarcasm, Spock?" Jim asked, incredulous.
"Once again, I am unaware of what you are referring to," Spock said, this time a small amount of humour coloured his voice. It wasn't much, but it caused a wide smile of achievement to spread across Jim's face.
Jim spent the rest of the detention sitting by Spock's side, continuing to annoy him with pointless and inappropriate questions, all the while inventing with new and creative names that somehow referred back to Spock's Vulcan characteristics.
After the detention had concluded, the students, all of whom had in no way remained silent, made their way back to the dormitories. Jim, without saying a word in parting to Spock, re-joined his friends and was quickly as immersed in the conversation as if he had been with them the whole time. Spock returned to his room to find a message on his PADD, it was from his mother.
Call me when you get this.
He did so, albeit somewhat warily.
"Mother," He greeted when she picked up.
"Spock," She said in return, her voice firm. "Do you want to explain to me how you received a detention on your first day of school?!" Amanda demanded.
"Mother, It was not about me, alone. Fifty-four students were issued a detention as a result of a food fight in the cafeteria, an incident I was not involved in." It was partly true. He had not thrown any of the food himself.
"Still Spock, you're hardly ever in trouble, I'd hate to think that you're not doing well in your new environment."
"I can assure you, Mother, that such an event will not occur again."
"Good. I worry about you Spock."
"That is both unnecessary and illogical. I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself."
"Well I'm your mother, it's my job," she said, a smile audible in her voice. "I miss you Spock," she added. And Spock who would usually never engage in such an emotion driven conversation, eventually replied with.
"I find I must concur with this statement."
"Okay, well, you stay out of trouble, young man," Amanda told him, voice warm once more.
"I will," Spock agreed.
"Okay, I love you Spock, goodbye."
"Goodbye, Mother," He said and ended the call.
The rest of the week went by without incident, and thankfully, Jim Kirk did not do anything excessive in order to annoy Spock. After a while Spock even became accustomed to the weight of Jim's feet on the back of his chair and the occasional flick to the ear when Jim was feeling particularly bored. T
he weekend was drawing near and Spock pondered idly whether he would be able to spend any time with Nyota, as he walked into the last lesson of the day on Friday; health. This class, Spock felt, was one that he did not find had any relevance to his education, however it was a required subject and Spock did understand its value amongst Humans: creatures who were so prone to doing what they wanted, without thinking of the consequence. Especially, he had noticed, teenagers. Spock had only had one health lesson so far and it had been uneventful. He had sat at the furthest distance from the front of the class as he could and had listened inattentively as the teacher explained the inner workings of the male reproductive organs, to many inappropriate remarks and unnecessary laughter from Spock's peers, mainly Jim. The lesson that Spock was currently in appeared to following in a similar direction and Spock, already having learnt both Vulcan and Human anatomy at a young age, once again let his focus wander. He did however hear when the teacher noted parenthetically how many interplanetary species, such as Vulcans, had similar biological construct to Humans.
"Really?" a loud voice issued from Spock's left. Spock felt exasperation course through him and was unable to prevent the common, human phrase 'here we go' flash through his mind.
"So, do Vulcans even have dicks?" Jim called out loudly, the class breaking out into snickers and giggles, and Spock felt the green blush rise in the tips of his ear.
"I assure you, Vulcans are equipped with necessary reproductive organs," he whispered back at Jim. "Our anatomy is not that dissimi-"
"James Kirk, see me after class," the teacher said angrily, interrupting Spock's hushed attempts to amend the situation.
"But, seriously, I'm curious. What's the point of this class if we don't learn how to have sex properly?"
"That is not the purpose of this class, Jim. The purpose is to make you aware of-"
"Of how to have sex, right?" Jim was smiling; he knew that the teacher would have no response. Spock turned to face Kirk.
"Vulcan's anatomy, as I stated, is very similar to that of a Human's."
"So you do have a dick," Jim said, now talking directly to Spock. "Is it green?"Spock opened his mouth as if to say something, but Jim cut him off, "or do you get your bits from your mom's side?" He smiled widely and cocked his head to the side, staring at Spock's crotch as if he could see through the fabric to ascertain the species of Spock's 'bits.' The whole class was engulfed in laughter. The teacher looked distraught.
"Mr Kirk, remove yourself from my class immediately and report to detention. This behaviour is unacceptable." Kirk slid his books smoothly from his desk into his arms, all the while grinning at Spock.
"Alright. Bye folks, as always, it was a pleasure brightening the dullness that is your lives." He winked at Spock, and mock saluted the teacher, before exiting the classroom, ruffling McCoy's hair playfully as he passed his angry friend. The sullen boy did not look amused.
Spock willed the green tinge that had risen on his cheeks to subside, and returned his focus to the front of the classroom, pointedly ignoring the stares of his classmates.